Wife is starting to accept me

[Miss Petra]

Just over a year ago I came out to my wife that I could no longer hide who I was inside. She discovered that I was a crossdresser early into us dating. It was always a cat & mouse dont look dont tell policy till a year ago.

It has been hard for both of us with new ways of understanding each others needs & wants. Boundaries were set feelings were shared & accepted by both parties. One year later she is realizing that I am not gay I am not going to leave her & I am a better person when I am able to express & release this part of me.

Just last night she picked out a purse for me out of her collection she thought I would like and asked me what my sizes were. My birthday is coming up at the end of this month :) She also wants me to go to the Tri-ess support group but she hates my animal print blouse:heehee:

Thank you for everyone in these forums for your good advice. We listened & followed it & it worked for me & my wife.

For the newcomers here listen there is some great wisdom in these halls.


Hugz,


Petra

[LindaMarie]

Petra,

I'm so glad to hear that things are going well between you and your wife. I hope you appreciate her understanding and accepting you. That's a wonderful thing for both of you.

All the best.

Linda

[Sweet Cindy]

I love hearing stories like this. Thanks for sharing, Petra and have a happy birthday. By the sounds of it, it may be the happiest ever!
Very happy for you, babe.

Cindy

[susie evans]

life is good and even better when every one is on the same page pacients and under standing :hugs:

susie

[Sarah Welch]

Yay, always nice to hear good news.

[Angie G]

Thats great Petra just keek it slow hun :hugs:
Angie

[SherriePall]

Petra -- That is great news! Make sure you tell your wife how much you appreciate and love her.

[Bernadina]

Hmmm. Maybe time to ask her to help you shop for new blouse.

[suzanne]

Fabulous news! I hope things continue to progress between you and your SO.

[RachelDenise]

Petra, it sounds like a happy ending in the making. Thanks for sharing.

[faltenrock]

Very nice for you Petra, wish you a happy birthday.

After I came out to my wife, she bought some black classic pumps for me,
that was the most wonderful Christmas present for me.

Doreen

[Suzie S.]

Petra, that is so wonderful to hear! There is a lot of good advice and caring people to talk to in this forum! It's heartwarming to know that we were able to help and guide both of you in a positive direction! Remember, openness and communication always need to be ongoing! Keep in touch and let us know how you both are doing! :happy: Early 'Happy Birthday' wishes to you also!:D

[Raychel]

Sounds like a dream come true to me Petra. It give me hope that someday I will be in the same position.

[Mitch23]

Sounds like a dream come true to me Petra. It give me hope that someday I will be in the same position.
me too - guess i still need to tell my wife i love her despite her non acceptance,

mitch

[Di]

Very happy for you hon:hugs:

[DawnL]

Petra, that is wonderful. My wife too thinks I am a better person when I am able to express all of me.

[Jocelyn Quivers]

Glad everything is working out for you Petra, there is no greater joy than having an accepting wife. Jocelyn

[Holly]

Petra, this is in deed wonderful news. And you are absolutely right about the amount of wisdom that is to be found here. Happy early birthday wishes to my sister to the north.

[Dixie]

That's so neat Petra, I'm so happy for you.

[Hali]

Petra I think you are Beginning/Finally going to see the Light of the Day in your life or can i say be Happy in your life, one advice TAKE IT EASY WITH HER cos we wouldn't want to frighten her with too much of our CDing right?

[Sheri 4242]

Petra,

Your posting is really good news, and I am very happy for you! Things sound as if they are progressing so well. I've stated many times that (a.) boundaries can be very healthy in a relationship b/c they give one party or the other a chance to grow within a specified comfort level (or at least within a negotiated level based on respectful understanding), and (b.) boundaries aren't engraved in stone -- they are more "stopping off points" that can (and should be) moved as growth results in better comprehension.

Two things I'd like to comment on:

First, you have exemplified, and excellently so, that it often takes time for certain aspects of CDing to reach a necessary assurance level (e.g., that you are not gay, or going to leave, and that you are a better person when able to express your femme side); there is no correct time frame -- it is unspecified and takes patience. It sounds as if you get an A+ in that department! I've known men who basically said something once and thought that was good enough. That isn't necessarily so . . . some (many?) of our SO's need to hear it a number of times and in different terms.

Second, often our SO's have a certain idea about style, etc. -- and while their ideas do not necessarily mesh with our own sense of what we want to wear, it can be extremely helpful to listen to the wife b/c by their very participation they gain a certain amount of ownership of our CDing. (It is all so'ooo psychological -- LOL!) That partial ownership translates into growth, which, in turn, leads to new levels of acceptance. For example, my wife wants me to progress out of a stage I have been stuck in regarding miniskirts and other Juniors' "teeny-booper" styles and dress more age-appropriately. It speaks volumes when she buys me an outfit from White House/Black Market.

At any rate, good job -- and happy upcoming birthday!!!

[Sheila]

Petra,

I am glad things are working for you and yopur wife it is good to hear:hugs: