No Name Thread!!!!!!

[Felix]

This may seem a strange name for a thread but I will try to explain myself. When I found this board a little over a year ago something had hit me like a sledge hammer and frightened the life out of me to put it mildly :eek: to explain I will rewind my clock so to speak. I'll go back to November 2005 Bomb Fire Night. I realized because of a good friend and Yachica that I wanted to look like and bring out my masculinity. The only time prior to this that I had strong feelings about such things was during my adult hood was when I first came out and was extremely butch and did wear mens clothing. Further back than this was in early child hood when I had strong feelings about wanting to be a boy.

So what has happened since November 2005? Well my curiosity about my gender and my strong masculine feelings came to the fore in 2006 and I decided I wanted to dress more representative of how I felt. Yachica has helped me no matter how weired it has made her feel at times and I can never thank her enough for being there for me 110% and more. I will always be there for her no matter what!!! I found this site and it blew my mind away cos here there were people who were like me and thought like me. It was a bit scary but I stayed and I'm so glad I did!! Psychologically I have been journeying and it has been intense and interesting. Just lately I seem to have come to some sort of inner peace and maybe equilibrium, if that is the right word. I have found some sort of peace with my male side everything has settled. Like I know that at this moment in time I have reached as far as I can go and I feel happy with that. I have realized there is no point in beating myself up over other people and how they feel. They will see what they want me to be and no more. It feels great when I'm called Felix but I can handle the 'Other' no use beating myself up over it, patients is the key to everything so that's how it has to be. Yeah I'm gonna get frustrated over certain things now and again but hey I'm human so am allowed.

So it's 2007 and I have emerged to the world, well my world in Hull. I have emerged in all my masculinity and to those I trust and feel comfy with revealed my name Felix. So this is where I am now comfy with who I am adding all the time to my new persona creating something for the future if the chance ever comes my way, to have chest surgery and who knows to go on hormones.

So It's May 2007 and I feel like I'm finally chilling and enjoying myself, 'Felix' at last xx Felix :hugs:

[Taylor105]

Dude....I could just feel the confidance swimming in this message. I am so glad that you are on the path to becoming the ultimate you and that you have your woman by your side. And you have all of us here who are your friends who are with you all the way. I am happy that you are so happy. I'm glad to be traveling this road with you as I learn about myself too. Hugs!!!

[Felix]

Hi my fellow traveler and good friend, thanx Hun xx Felix :hugs:

[xsideburnsx]

Reading that thread was really nice. I too could see your confidence shining through. That's a great thing to have and knowing you are on your way to a happier you...gives myself and I'm sure other's faith that in the end...we will all pull through ok. :thumbsup:

[Felix]

Thanx Jacob, we are all here for each other and sometimes just knowing you peeps are here to listen makes all the difference xx Felix :hugs:

[Dasein9]

:hugs:

[kerrianna]

Felix, that was a wonderful post. :hugs:

I could say almost the same things about myself. I felt a real deep happiness reading about your acceptance, your calmness, and your understanding of where you truly are. I'm glad to have been a part of your journey and glad you are a part of mine. :hugs::love:

[Question Mark]

That's great, Felix. Your words not only reflect your confidence and happiness, but give the rest of us some reassurance as well.

[Felix]

Thanx Das :hugs:

Thanx Kerrianna and Mark I am honored to be part of your journeys to asnI am with everyone here :hugs::hugs: xx Felix

[ZenFrost]

It's great that you're feeling comfortable with who you are and the path you walk. Congrats.

[Alaceann]

It's nice to see someone becoming happy with themself and I am so glad for you that things are going well. I like your full picture avitar, you look realy good in it.:hugs:

[Felix]

Thanx Zen and Alaceann :hugs: xx Felix

[happyfish]

That's awesome. :hugs:

[Felix]

Thanx Happy :hugs: xx Felix

[Taylor105]

I can say that for myself I have been getting happier and happier every day now that I no longer have to hide who I am. People tell me that they can see my eyes looking brighter. I see the same thing when I look at you bud!!

[Felix]

Awww! Taylor my friend you are very sweet and a good mate :hugs: I'm glad you are feeling happier with each passing day and that people are noticing. The eyes are an amazing part of our personalities cos ya can tell so much by them :happy: xx Felix :hugs:

[Taylor105]

I totally agree with you on that. I get compliments on my eyes all the time. Even more so lately. I guess they must be shining more. lol

[Felix]

Keep em shining my friend, keep em shining :thumbsup: xx Felix :hugs:

[Taylor105]

Right now I'm in an awkward stage at least appearance wise but I'm working on it. I'm just glad you are doing so well. :)

[Felix]

I know what ya mean about appearance. I guess I've took on a more mature kinda conservative look cos it's the only way I feel I can pass well. I'd love to wear other stuff but I just don't feel right cos of my boobs they are not right except in anythin but a shirt. Dunno what I'm gonna do in the summer when we are on holiday lol. Oh well will deal with that when it comes xx Felix :hugs:

[pocoyo]

Aww that's brilliant.
I'm glad you have reached a state of equilibrium, and are feeling good :happy:

(Btw I know what u mean about sites like this seeming scary when you're 1st learning about yourself... I avoided them/occasionally peeked at them for ages before properly allowing myself to become involved.)

Good for you Felix dude :hugs::love: xxx

[Taylor105]

I know what ya mean about appearance. I guess I've took on a more mature kinda conservative look cos it's the only way I feel I can pass well. I'd love to wear other stuff but I just don't feel right cos of my boobs they are not right except in anythin but a shirt. Dunno what I'm gonna do in the summer when we are on holiday lol. Oh well will deal with that when it comes xx Felix :hugs:


I understand what you are saying. For me it is not so much the boobs part. It's that if I try to dress more grown up I don't pass because of my face!!!

[Felix]

Thanx Guys :hugs:

I was really chuffed the other night when Yachica had been talking to a friend and she sent her a pic of me she said I looked like a man and she just couldn't get over how much like a man I looked :heehee: xx Felix :hugs:

[Kimberley]

A heartwarming post Felix.

I know you will continue on your path and be even happier.

:hugs:
Kimberley

[Felix]

Thanx Kim Hun xx Felix :hugs::hugs:

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

Wonderful post, Felix! I'm so happy you're feeling more centered.

BTW, kudos to Yachica. Partners also face "transitioning" and from what I've heard that can be just as tough for lesbian partners as it is for hetro partners.

[scarlet]

thats probbly the best part about this place. Before I found this site I had battles going on in my head at times , at times thinking I was the only one who could be this messed up. But at least now Iknow it's not just me we're all messed up,but enjoying it . I'm glad you are also.:happy:

[Felix]

Thanx Marlena that's sweet :hugs::hugs:

Thanx Scarlet and yeah that's what we are all here for support and friendship and too try and make sense of everything xx Felix :hugs: