need advise (talking with wife)

[quietone]

hello every1 yes its the quietone needidng advise.i just want 2 know how do i go about wearing womans clothing since i just opened 2 my wife? she didnt take it very well. but were talking.

[Sandra]

Well if she didn't take it very well I suggest you carry on talking, answer her honestly with any questions she asks, obtain some literature on cding for her to read and of course she could join this forum. My guess is that she is hurting, confused and probably angry that she wasn't told sooner. You have to let her set the pace and take it real slow, because if you try to push the chances are she will dig her heels in and you will get know where.

[Sheri 4242]

Well if she didn't take it very well I suggest you carry on talking . . . You have to let her set the pace and take it real slow, because if you try to push the chances are she will dig her heels in and you will get know where.

Sandra GG is absolutely right. You've opened the door, but you cannot force her through it. This is a time for honest communication -- at her pace and even if you have to cover the same questions over and over.

Otherwise, it is difficult to answer your question because you leave out important factors. We don't know how long you've been CDing, to what extent, and where you want to go with CDing (for example, is it just an "at home" thing, or do you want to go "out and about)?!!!???

[GlitterGG]

Go at your wife's pace. If you've been doing this for a while but have been keeping it a secret, she will likely feel angry that you didn't trust her with the truth from the start. If you yourself have just started CDing, you may have questions. It may very well help your wife if she joined the group. But definately go at her pace, and without question keep the lines of communication open with her.

[Sheila]

The girls have given you really good advice ......... slowly slowly and baby steps ....... even if oyur wife appears to be accepting and wanting to move forward still baby steps hun........ sometimes through love we actually go faster than we are really ready to accept it mentally ..... I know I did and we ended up in a bump or two.

:hugs:Jess

[SANDRA MICHELLE]

Yeh we don't have enough information on your situation so the standard response to your question should be as noted already, go at your wifes pace with her feelings in mind.

[Kellicd]

You have opened the door. That's a step. Now back off a bit and allow her to digest this. I bought my wife a book to read when I came out. It's "My Husband Wears My Clothes" by Peggy Rudd. The point I'm at now is that she's accepted it although she's made it clear that my dressing does NOTHING for her. Therefore I try to do a lot of cleaning while she's at work when I dress. She's coming around to stating that she can see her Maid was here today. I often stay dressed when I accomplish a lot of quality cleaning or even a few loads of laundry.

Good luck Girl.

[marie354]

It would be so nice if there were some rules that would make it all work out, but there really aren't any. :sad:
:happy: But the good thing is, take it slowly at her pace and things may work out fine.
Slow and sure seem to work the best from what I've experienced and read here. I waited about 5 years for my GF to accept it and now she even participates a bit. As a matter of fact we're supposed to get our nails done later today for tomorrow. WooHoo!

But as others have already said, be patient and go at her speed, even it her speed stops once in a while. You have just put a 5-pound potato on her plate and it will take some time to devour it all before she's ready to start asking questions. They will come as she feels more comfortable about asking them.
:hugs:

[Mitch23]

some excellent advice from the girls as usual. Perhaps we should put together a FAQ pack as this issue comes up so often

Mitch

[az_azeel]

Hi quietone... I think I said this to you when I welcomed you in the newbies section.. as the rest of the girls have said take it one step at a time there is no quick fix.. but go easy on the rocky road and take care :hugs: