need advice (dad's gf "borrows")

[OC-crossdresser]

ok this is the deal. dad has a 20yr old girl friend when he was gone she went into MY room and took a few of MY things (undies corsets ext) and i was PISSED i took the 3 things out of the laundry i took them back...BUT we left for a few days she came back in MY room took even more! THIS TIME i said to her " hey Amanda had anyone been in my room my stuff is all messed up" she said " o i didn't go in their my friends might of...if any of your friends things are missing tell me so i can sort them out" i said ok..it was just some things no big deal...THEN i noticed MORE she took....this time (today) i put a KEY lock on my room door!!! BUT my question is should i go in dads room and take MY stuff back..

p.s dad knows a cd knows but is not like it

p.s.s i sent Amanda a msg that the things are mine...she was all happy i told her we can g shopping ext...

but still if she ASKED to have the things i would of given them to her and more BUT she just took them!

so should i take back whats MINE!?

[Ekatcha]

Theft is theft. Dunno another way to put it.

Perhaps if you two come to an agreement, things will be ok, but I'd keep an eye out personally. Watch out for anything else going missing... one never knows. It's one thing to ask to borrow or have, another just to take. You're smart to put a lock on the door... but you shouldn't have to. *shrug* perhaps she just needs some rules to know the lay of the land, so to speak. I'll hold out hope for the better but secretly assume the worst (my nature though).

[Sheri 4242]

Maybe you need to have a heart-to-heart talk with her! Sounds as if she knows exactly what she is taking -- and I'll bet she knows they are yours. Ask her if she is just borrowing w/o asking, or is she trying to send you a message?!!! Then, play the conversation out based on what she says -- and be reading between the lines!!!

[OC-crossdresser]

Theft is theft. Dunno another way to put it.

Perhaps if you two come to an agreement, things will be ok, but I'd keep an eye out personally. Watch out for anything else going missing... one never knows. It's one thing to ask to borrow or have, another just to take. You're smart to put a lock on the door... but you shouldn't have to. *shrug* perhaps she just needs some rules to know the lay of the land, so to speak. I'll hold out hope for the better but secretly assume the worst (my nature though).

i was going to take back my clothing and put it in my locked room...talk to her explain steeling is WRONG and to ask ext...but take back what she took as to show her its mine! ext..

[jessbcuzz]

Ask here how she would like it if you were to go into her bedroom and take her clothes to wear? Better yet, take something of hers and let her see you in public with it!

[NZ_Dawn]

IMHO this is not good behaviour on her part. She has encorached upon your privacy in perhaps an arrogant manner as well as taking (Borrowing without asking permission = theft) your personal things. Give her the message loud and clear that you do not find this acceptable: does she do this with just anyone? Perhaps you may want to ask her WHY she has gone into your room and taken these things? In all this however tread carefully. I note the relationship between her and your father! All the best.

[battybattybats]

If your dad knows you dress (and doesn't like it) then tell him what she has done and ask him to let you get your stuff.

I'm sure your dad won't be impressed with her even if he doesn't like what you wear.

She has to learn not to touch your stuff. Be nice but be firm.

Honesty, it's a weapon of offense and defense. In this case I'd certainly use it.

I went through a similar situation, my (alcoholic) step-father was going into my room and going through my porn magazines. I discovered it because of a) ciggarette ash caught in a couple of pages and b) one magazine was left in a hiding spot in the bathroom on top of the linen cupboard which I found when trying to get the shaving mirror down.

I put locks on my door too and I told my mother. There were tensions between them after that but what of it? That is not my responsibility it was his.

The lock didn't entirely stop him, as he still managed to sneak in a few times after that when the door or window was unlocked. He also stole cash. I put a mousetrap in his hiding spot (non set, it was a message not yet violence). That stopped it.

Disrespecting your stuff is not ok and its not something to put up with.

[psion128]

Damn. I'd be pissed off too. My 2 cents:

I'd take my stuff back w/o letting anyone know. The lock is a good idea and once things are back where they are talk to her. Have a "heart to heart" so she don't do that again. Basically she dissed you. No question about it. I believe she knows you are a CD and does your immediate family know(in the household). If your still in the closet. That may cause you some problems. But for real, see if you can really trust her.

[Danielle1960]

Tell your dad and take it back.
Confiding in him would show your trust in him and even though he won't necessarily belief you.. (just a guess) at first it would be good for him to know.
Keep the 20 year old girl out of the loop during the conversation and retrieval process. Even though Dad might be able to use some dating advice it won't go over well keep it all in the common ground area.
Danielle
P.S. Arrgh the more I read your problem the angry I get:mad:

[Karren H]

Hold the phone!!! I'm confused as to why she want's them... If you originally retrieved them from the laundry then maybe she was going to say..... (I'm going out on a big limb here) WASH them?? Why else would she throw them in the laundry? Dahhhhh Maybe she's a clean freak or something???

If not then maybe your dad is using her to try to get you to stop crossdressing..... Why not go over and steal all her bras and panties..... lol Just kidding....

Or plan C - talk to her and your father......

Karren

[AngGG]

Let me preface this by saying it is absolutely wrong to take and use something that you have not been given permission to use, and not return it to boot, then to be rude enough to do it again! If it was me I would take my stuff back and lock it in my room.

Ok now I have to ask....does anyone else see the irony in this thread??? Usually its something like..."when I was younger I used to steal my sisters(could also fill in mothers, aunts, sisters friends), _________________(fill in any article of clothing)


:hiding:

[Stephenie S]

It sounds to me like you two really need to talk to each other. She put them in the laundry? Why? Maybe they were dirty?

The situation as you have described it shows two people who don't have a clue what each other are doing. Talk to her. Ask her WHY. TELL her you want her to leave your stuff alone. You should not need a lock on your door in your own home.

Communication. It's a good start.

Stephie

[crimsoncage GG]

Let me preface this by saying it is absolutely wrong to take and use something that you have not been given permission to use, and not return it to boot, then to be rude enough to do it again! If it was me I would take my stuff back and lock it in my room.

Ok now I have to ask....does anyone else see the irony in this thread??? Usually its something like..."when I was younger I used to steal my sisters(could also fill in mothers, aunts, sisters friends), _________________(fill in any article of clothing)


:hiding: `Oh yes I do, the shoe is on the other foot now.:tongueout

Talk to your dad, get your stuff back. Lock your closet.

[GlitterGG]

Be nice but firm. Confront her, communicate with her, tell her to knock it off. Those items are yours. PERIOD. She needs to return every one of your items.She wouldn't like it if you went and took her things would she? And even if it was her friends that took it, so what? Where the hell do they get off rooting around in someone else's room? And where the hell does your dad's gf get off by allowing her friends to disrespect you that way? Damn straight I'd be pissed, and you have every right to be as well.

[OC-crossdresser]

OK a lil update..i promise their was no intent on 'washing the cloths for me" cuz 1 there back in HER closed now and 2...i have found 2 items (a cute top n expensive skirt!) that she CUT UP!!! she is a sl&% and dresses that way...so she takes my stuff then cuts it up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she is over now but soon i think they are all leaving then im returning MY STUFF also i told dad she went in my room and took some things of mine..he asked ...drugs...i said no nothing illegal just i want a lock and told him not to tell her that i knew, he simply said ok..thats how i got the lock..

i mean its 1 thing to take my stuff but to CUT IT UP!!! omg I'm more pissed! i payed like 35$ for that skirt! GURR this is so got to stop!

[27th Jennifer]

That's not ok at all, under any circumstances, regardless of what she took.

[Shelly Preston]

This is totally wrong

Taking clothes and cutting them up is unforgivable :angry:

It was clothes this time

Will it be money next time +? Be extra careful

[Alice B]

This girl has some real issues. Be careful.:mad:

[OC-crossdresser]

This girl has some real issues. Be careful.:mad:

thats why i got a KEY LOCK for my door just me and dad have the 2 keys so if anything is messed up i could oney point to dad HAHA

i hope once i take ALL my stuff back this is not a prob anymore...cuz of the lock

[Tamara Croft]

I really don't know how you've kept your cool about it. If they were my clothes and she'd cut them up, I'd be in her wardrobe doing the same damn thing... silly :censor: :Angry3: Obviously that's not the best way to go about doing things, but jeezz... what a cow :mad:

[OC-crossdresser]

I really don't know how you've kept your cool about it. If they were my clothes and she'd cut them up, I'd be in her wardrobe doing the same damn thing... silly :censor: :Angry3: Obviously that's not the best way to go about doing things, but jeezz... what a cow :mad:

IT GETS BETTER! her n her friend went out to smoke a cig so i went in closet and are you ready!..the cut list is now...top...tube dress....2 skirts....i got to save my stuff b4 she kills any more lol

[Tamara Croft]

Why is she cutting up your stuff though? have you asked her?

[OC-crossdresser]

Why is she cutting up your stuff though? have you asked her?

cuz she is a s%&t and likes stuff to show all tummy and all legs and part rear end...

[AllieSF]

IMHO, your problem may be minor when compared to what your Dad may have got himself into. I don't know your age, but assume you are in your teens. Your Dad is dating a 20 year old, which is not so bad for your Dad, but for you?? She brings her friends over to go through your stuff? Wow, imagine what she may go through of your Dad's stuff, like old credit card bills, bank accounts, etc. I recommend that you maintain a locked room, get your stuff back from her, tell her to stay out of your room, advise your dad that she is now cutting up some of your clothes, and she is taking her friends into your room and closet. Sounds like a bad situation for both of you especially your Dad if she decides to play with Dad's financial accounts. Good luck.

[Tamara Croft]

cuz she is a s%&t and likes stuff to show all tummy and all legs and part rear end...Interesting.... I just looked at your profile picture :whistling:

[OC-crossdresser]

Interesting.... I just looked at your profile picture :whistling:

i never said i am not one:heehee: LOL thats why she cut em..

and my dad is deep in shit long ago with her but its HIS problm not mine lol

and I AM 21 dad is 63 she is 20 lol

[RobertaFermina]

Does the word 'sociopath' come to anyone's mind ?
I suspect that making agreements with her, or your dad, for that matter, are of no use.
Lock and Key are great. Leave no Key behind. Don't think a key in your pop's custody is safe from her.

Ouch!

:rose: Roberta :rose:

[AmandaM]

Hmmmmm......

She's boinking your dad, that's what he gets. What does she get? Money? Cars? His retirement? Sounds like a lose-lose for you. Can you move?

[Sinthia]

I believe in total honesty. Do not take her things in retaliation. Tell her that you know that she has taken some of your clothing, and that has to stop. Let her know that if she would like to borrow something, then ask you if she can. If you come on as a "sister" to her, you may gain a great friend.

[OC-crossdresser]

I believe in total honesty. Do not take her things in retaliation. Tell her that you know that she has taken some of your clothing, and that has to stop. Let her know that if she would like to borrow something, then ask you if she can. If you come on as a "sister" to her, you may gain a great friend.

thats what I'm trying....and may dad is dumb about young women but he has plenty of money for it...

[jennifer easton]

this all sounds quite bizarre! smells of a fish.

[Melissa73]

i have to admit to knowing how you feel. about a year ago, i was living at a local motel (where i worked). And well it was a very "loose" motel operation, but one housekeeper actually went through my room when i wasnt there. And she found my "clothes" But she also took my brand new bra. (2x). But it really felt as A violation of my privacy.....and then i rethought it. It was kinda my punishment, since i did it to my sister when i was younger. Sneaking through her room and taking her clothes.

But the worst part of the situation, was that word got out that i dressed and me being too shy and no afraid could only deny it. (dont think it was believed but who knows).

Michelle

[Wenda]

My advice: make detailed notes, this could be a sequal to Desperate Housewives! This is just frickin' weird. Your dad is older than me, humping someone young enough to be his granddaughter for god's sake. There's issue #1, You can't be Wrong and Strong, and your old man is in NO position to be strong.
#2, what this babe is doing is so frickin' wrong that I can't believe we are still chatting about it. There has been lots of good rational advice about talking to her, your dad etc. This babe obviously has your dad conned, you cannot expect him to be of any help. She sounds like a profiteering sl*t! You say your dad knows but does not approve. I did not approve of my second son dressing because he is large and has a huge frame, and obviously not femme. He was the subject of ridicule. I didn't advise him to stop dressing on moral grounds, but on the basis that he was exposing himself and his brother to ridicule. Think about why your dad doesn't approve.
Maybe this is childish, but it sounds like the maturity level of your dad and his GF is pubescent, so it might work. How about going into her stuff, and reclaiming all of your stuff that she has stolen including the stuff she has cut up, and some of her stuff. Then, have a meeting with her and your dad, produce your thjings, one at a time, and confirm that she took them and cut them up. When you finish her inventory, then produce your inventory of her stuff, and ask her and your dad, which ones you can cut up to your liking.
This b**ch sounds dangerous and your dad sounds like he may not be much help. All the best!! wenda:thumbsup:

[OC-crossdresser]

My advice: make detailed notes, this could be a sequal to Desperate Housewives! This is just frickin' weird. Your dad is older than me, humping someone young enough to be his granddaughter for god's sake. There's issue #1, You can't be Wrong and Strong, and your old man is in NO position to be strong.
#2, what this babe is doing is so frickin' wrong that I can't believe we are still chatting about it. There has been lots of good rational advice about talking to her, your dad etc. This babe obviously has your dad conned, you cannot expect him to be of any help. She sounds like a profiteering sl*t! You say your dad knows but does not approve. I did not approve of my second son dressing because he is large and has a huge frame, and obviously not femme. He was the subject of ridicule. I didn't advise him to stop dressing on moral grounds, but on the basis that he was exposing himself and his brother to ridicule. Think about why your dad doesn't approve.
Maybe this is childish, but it sounds like the maturity level of your dad and his GF is pubescent, so it might work. How about going into her stuff, and reclaiming all of your stuff that she has stolen including the stuff she has cut up, and some of her stuff. Then, have a meeting with her and your dad, produce your thjings, one at a time, and confirm that she took them and cut them up. When you finish her inventory, then produce your inventory of her stuff, and ask her and your dad, which ones you can cut up to your liking.
This b**ch sounds dangerous and your dad sounds like he may not be much help. All the best!! wenda:thumbsup:

Ya she just left so ima go repo my s$#t she wear the camp tube dress cut short to be a long skirt...right in front of me she wear this! WOW:Angry3:

[OC-crossdresser]

UPDATE: i took my stuff back a lil more stuff cut then i expeted...im going to send her a text explaingin what i did and why :-P

[Ekatcha]

I honestly don't think you have anything to explain to her, nor why. I suspect that the theft of your outfits are probably just the tip of the iceburg... maybe that hasn't been shown yet, but I reckon it will at some point in time. Someone so inconsiderate is dangerous... not just the fact that she raided your closet and took what she saw fit, but then felt the need to cut it up to claim it as hers... something wrong with this chick, no way around it. I shant be surprised if other bits around the house start to disappear. She's trouble... old man rich or not... be careful of your things and yourself.

[OC-crossdresser]

mmm i am....my stuff is locked in my room :heehee:

p.s so after a took my stuff back....i said well its 1am...i was looking at her other CUTE tops and like 8 cute jackets! so i threw on a cute top my sticky bra (gives me tiny breast lol) and a socal jacket...n went to n in out the lady taking money n giving food didn't even 2ed look lol...tho pep inside looked lol..i went drive threw...

p.s.s so since she cut my stuff i feel she ows me lol...so i also took a cute tiny green wife beater saying " hustler honey" mine now lol

[GlitterGG]

I'd put all her stuff back. I know you feel she owes you, and you're right, she does. But taking her stuff kind of puts you down on her level. You have to be better than her. Be careful with this chick, it seems there's more trouble down the road where she is concerned.

[Stephanie-L]

OK, I see very bad things here. 1. Your dad is dating/sleeping/living with a girl younger than his child (you). That indicates some big problems with relationships on his part. 2. She is taking and mutilating your things, possibly with her friends help. It looks to me that she is trying to get rid of you, you are a source of competition for your fathers attention. It seems like you and your dad have a good relationship and she is jealous of it. So she is trying to force you out. I would not be surprised if she is talking trash about you to your dad, things like you tried to kiss her/hit on her, or you were mean and yelled at her, or even accusing you of striking her. This is a very immature girl, but it seems a very manipulative one, so watch out. I worry that her physical attacks may move from your clothes to you. It looks like your father isn't totally taken in by her since he let you have the lock on your door, but if he was really aware he would have confronted her. If you can try to keep an eye on the money, what else is a 20 year old girl doing with a guy 3 times her age? She is basically a prostitute trying to control her john. Don't try to make deals with her, it will just give her ideas or leverage, she will never be your friend or shopping partner or sister, she only sees you as the ENEMY, competition for your dad, and his money. My advice is to maintain your relationship with your dad as best you can (difficult when she could be trying to poison it) and get out of there if you can possibly afford to. Living with them is just giving her the opportunity to make it worse, if you are on your own you have more control over your relationship as an adult with your father. This is just my opinion, I am not a shrink, but I have seen lots of this type of stuff in my life. Good luck to you....Stephanie

[OC-crossdresser]

I'd put all her stuff back. I know you feel she owes you, and you're right, she does. But taking her stuff kind of puts you down on her level. You have to be better than her. Be careful with this chick, it seems there's more trouble down the road where she is concerned.

her "stuff" haha i took ONE tank hustler tank top...thats it...other then that i wore the jacket out that night for a in n out run but hung it back up..i "barrowed" it HAHA and I DID return it....but the hustler tank is mine :-P

[OC-crossdresser]

OK, I see very bad things here. 1. Your dad is dating/sleeping/living with a girl younger than his child (you). That indicates some big problems with relationships on his part. 2. She is taking and mutilating your things, possibly with her friends help. It looks to me that she is trying to get rid of you, you are a source of competition for your fathers attention. It seems like you and your dad have a good relationship and she is jealous of it. So she is trying to force you out. I would not be surprised if she is talking trash about you to your dad, things like you tried to kiss her/hit on her, or you were mean and yelled at her, or even accusing you of striking her. This is a very immature girl, but it seems a very manipulative one, so watch out. I worry that her physical attacks may move from your clothes to you. It looks like your father isn't totally taken in by her since he let you have the lock on your door, but if he was really aware he would have confronted her. If you can try to keep an eye on the money, what else is a 20 year old girl doing with a guy 3 times her age? She is basically a prostitute trying to control her john. Don't try to make deals with her, it will just give her ideas or leverage, she will never be your friend or shopping partner or sister, she only sees you as the ENEMY, competition for your dad, and his money. My advice is to maintain your relationship with your dad as best you can (difficult when she could be trying to poison it) and get out of there if you can possibly afford to. Living with them is just giving her the opportunity to make it worse, if you are on your own you have more control over your relationship as an adult with your father. This is just my opinion, I am not a shrink, but I have seen lots of this type of stuff in my life. Good luck to you....Stephanie

this may be all true BUT me n dads FREDNSHIP is so beyond strong .. he knows how i feel about her...and i know i am her enemy thats why i got closer...keep you friends close and enemy's closer :p

and he did not talk to her about raiding my room cuz i asked him NOT TO as it would cause drama between me and her..id rather get the lock and call it a day (as i did)

my dad has had many wifes and no he is not a player...he is the nicest man alive! say different...ill have to talk via e-mail i cant say it hear...:rolleyes: he is 63 and lonely for physical compassion...thats what he pays for..not her love..he gets love from me...