I'm not allowed to go on what is usually a family outing because I crossdress........

[Karren H]

Yep...... That's what the wife alluded to over the last few weeks and at the time I had no idea what she was talking about.. My daughter has always been into theater and dance so when they started advertising for "Hair Spray" the movie, she was excited to say the least.... On numerous occasions since then, my wife straight out told me that I wasn't going, just she and the daughter... I thought. "Ok... they want a little Mother Daughter time... awwww isn't that special...... fine with me!!!

What I didn't know at the time and appearently she did know was that John Travolta was staring and crossdressing in the movie.... Ahhh Haaa!!! Now I get it!!! That's why she kept telling me I can't go!!! Not that I'm big on musicals anyway... She's probably affraid I'll show up in a dress...

A couple days ago we were watching TV and the Hair Spray ad comes on..... about half way through she turns to me and says "You know that's John Travolta"? Ahhhhh No I didn't, I replied...... "Yes, and he really wanted to do the part.... took hours to do his makeup every day"... Good for him!! I said... With a SMILE!!! Funny that she seemed to want to talk about it with me.....

So hope everyone enjoys the movie..... guess I'll have to wait till it hits the DVD's........ Don't tell me the ending.... hate that.... SIGH

Hmmmmm Maybe if she takes the son, then I'll dress up and go see it at a different theater.... or maybe the same theater??? :D

Love Karren

[Marla S]

.... or maybe the same theater??? :D
Sounds like a good idea.:heehee:

[Lovely Rita]

Karren, I was going to mention theater, movies etc. as a Karren activity but I thought it was too easy.

Something for a rainy day:thumbsup: I see you have the umbrella:D

[Sheri 4242]

On numerous occasions since then, my wife straight out told me that I wasn't going, just she and the daughter . . .

Karren: I really don't understand?!!! Of course I know how very well known you are on ths forum, but I really don't know that much about your CDing and your family. Obviously your wife knows you CD -- or at least so it would seem. Does your daughter know and how old is she? My first take is, let's say for the sake of argument, that your daughter doesn't know about your crossdressing. In that case, what would be the big deal?!!! None!!!

The other "side of the coin" considerations would be that your daughter knows and either (a.) has no problem with it, or (b.) does have a problem with it.

If the situation is (a.), then again, there should be no big deal. If it is (b.), then going as a family -- with little or no commentary (a just let it "soak in" type of approach) -- would be the way to go. If your daughter falls within (b.), you should absolutely go, then let what is on the big screen be "food for thought." Depending on your daughter's age, it could be a springboard for future talks if she is younger, and "ditto" if she's older, just perhaps a substantive conversation in the near future.

Sounds like this is a bit of a conflicted situation, Karren! That said, I'm certain you will handle it correctly -- you are more than just the wit of this forum -- you are the "wit and wisdom" of it in many people's minds, and that wisdom will serve you correctly, of that I feel confident.

(((By the way, I have four adult children. One knows I CD to an absolute certainty -- I dress freely around her and she has NO problem with it. The next only knows that I dress "from time-to-time" like on Halloween and for things like charity "Mr. Cutie" contests. That child has NO problem with it -- in fact, if discussed fully, they would probably have no problem with knowing the whole deal. The next child probably has no idea -- but if they did they would probably not be very flexible about it -- they constantly say how "open-minded" they are, but they are as close-minded and dogmatic as they come. The fourth child is so uptight they could make diamonds from coal if placed in the proper place -- if you get my drift. They are very intollerant, totally lack one single empathetic bone, and well, they would not only be unapproachable to discuss CDing, they would become hostile. I tell you all this b/c the four of them represent another way of looking at your situation. The first child I mentioned would greatly enjoy the movie, as would the second child. The third child is an enigma -- and who knows -- they probably would enjoy the movie up to the point that it crossed into their life. The fourth child might enjoy the movie b/c it is a movie and this child NEVER misses an opportunity to (1.) spend money, or (2.) "go" anywhere as long as someone else is footing the bill -- but would be disgusted if they thought about anybody they actually knew being a CDer. Is your daughter represented in any of the personalities I have mentioned? If so, PM me and maybe I cn give you a more comprehensive response from personal experience that would help.)))

Godd luck!!!

[Emily Ann Brown]

ROFLOL.....not at you sis, at the concept of punishing you by not letting you go to a movie where the lead character is a man dressed as a woman. I guess you'll just have to stay home and watch one of the 20 sumpin CD/TG Hollywood movies you have collected.

Emily Ann

[goofus]

Don't wait 'til it hits the DVD's. If you really want to see it, go by yourself, heck with the wife!

[Carin's Wife GG]

which is a horrible place for her and for you. I can guess she would feel like everyone in the theatre would somehow *now* that you are a CDer. Of course they wouldn't but that seems to be how her head works at this point in time. I am sorry you won't have the chance to see it with your family.


Louise.

[Brianna Lovely]

When your wife and daughter go, you and your son should both get dressed and go together, to the same theater. Then out for a nice dinner afterwards.

[KandisTX]

I think my wife and daughter would have a blast if Kandis went with them to the movie.. LOL..

Kandis:love:

[Sheri 4242]

I can guess she would feel like everyone in the theatre would somehow *know* that you are a CDer. Of course they wouldn't but that seems to be how her head works at this point in time.

Louise,

You've touched on a significant truth that affects people on any number of subjects, CDing included. Often a person will think others know something, as in your example, about which there is no way the general populace has -- or could have -- the slightest clue!

If Karren's wife is in that mindset, she could be imagining that everybody knows when the truth is that nobody knows!

I am convinced that if Karren will take what I said and combine it with your keen insight, she can closely figure out what is going on with her wife's thought process.

(It is so great to not only see you actively posting, but to see the wisdom we have come to expect from you!!!)

:love:


Sheri

[Wendy me]

let them go and enjoy the movie .... that simple .... if you want to see it go any other time you want .... might open some doors for you ask how the movie was ... and ask if John Travolta relay looked like a girl ... and if the movie was good .... then you might ask your wife if she would go see it again this time with you....

[JoAnnDallas]

:rofl::rofl::rofl:......Karen....that funny....I can see her looking at the AMC channel listing and seeing that "Some Like It Hot" is airing and telling you you can not watch the AMC channel that evening. This has got me thinking, was the part of the girl's mother a CD role in the orginal movie??

[kassandra richard]

JoAnn, the original "Hairspray" had Divine (THE Drag Queen herself) in the role that Travolta is playing and Ricki Lake as the daughter. But I don't believe that the mother is, in the context of the storyline, a CD but a GG. Never saw it other than clips, but it seems that Divine played it over the top.

Here's the IMDB link to the original movie:
http://imdb.com/title/tt0095270/

Turns out that Divine was cast as Edna after Christine Jorgensen was unable to take the part (probably on account of her lung cancer).

Kassandra

[susie evans]

karren don't worry your daughter allready no's about you and would probaly not have an issue either our youngest daughter is a model and she figured susie out about 15 years ago but i just learned about 3 years ago that she new maby you and her should go to the movies are a play kind a like a daddy daughter date you never no what you might learn........ just a thought

:love: susie

[SherriePall]

Karren -- Maybe your wife is afraid you'll jump up during the middle of the movie and yell something like, "Hey, I look better in that dress than Travolta does!"
JoAnn -- The mother is supposed to be GG but since Devine played her in the original movie, it has been tradition even on stage that it is done in drag.

[Tree GG]

Option #1: She's still afraid this CD thing you do that she knows naught of will explode and you'll turn into a singing, dancing, twinkling guy in a dress by being exposed to said thing. No need to encourage you with a positive role model :D Or it may be contagious. I notice the son is still on the maybe list.

Option #2: She really did want some mother/daughter time and thought you'd complain and whine about being drug to a musical and how stupid that is. (It never ceases to amaze me that my husband says Darlene wants to do that stuff, but he wouldn't be caught dead there in previous years.)

Either way, you're handling it with good grace and a lack of anger that I can appreciate.

[teresa jeen]

oh well its just a play. why dont she take all the kids and you can get ready and go SHOPPING.

[BarbaraTalbot]

I was in Jr high when Saturday Night Fever came out. I remember that Jr high school kids thought it was cool and that the girls thought Travolta was cute.

I babysat for a young couple in their late twentys. The had the movie on laser disc and the wife GUSHED about how good the movie was. I was babysitting while they went to a class on The Hustle. Every woman at the time wanted Travolta.

I seem to remember that you are about young 50's? (im 42 in male mode 38 en femme) Im guessing your wife was very into Travolta back then whether she mentioned it at the time or since.

I'm wondering if rolling around in her mind was the possibility that a sexy MAN might enjoy dressing, and thats OK.

Now, before you order matching nighties from VS for the both of 'you-s", I should warn that my wifes take on this is the opposite. She has heard the rumor that Travolta is gay, and if he ever comes out, it would give more fuel to your wife's resistance to Cding.

Funny how two people can see things so differently. I see it as a hopeful opening, and she doesnt see it as positive or negative, but could see it being negative, IF Travolta is Gay or Bi and admits it (like that would happen)

"Tom, come out of the closet...I'm not in the closet..." ~South Park

[Kieron Andrew]

i dont get it...why cant 'he' go..... its gotta be the mother daughter thing....but it would be nice if it was a family affair, you dont HAVE to be dressed to go

[Sporco]

Actually, I think the original "Hair Spray" (1988) was wonderful and didn't need to be remade. I don't think it could be improved upon.

It starred Ricki Lake, Divine, Sonny Bono, Deborah Harry and others.

If you haven't seen it, you should make a trip to the video store and rent it!

[Tamara Croft]

you are more than just the wit of this forum -- you are the "wit and wisdom" of it in many people's minds, and that wisdom will serve you correctly, of that I feel confident.Jeez... someone get me a bucket :puke: (or you both get a room)...

[cindybarnes]

Karen,, I would take my daughter and make my wife stay home,, she always gets the wrong impression when we see a movie with any CD related topic. Am I bad ? LOL
so ask your daughter if she wants to see it again with you !

[Karren H]

Well If my wife want's to take the daughter then I'm fine with it.....

But talk about turn arounds.... Tonight, my wife said "Come on were going to TG Maxx shopping" So we get there and after looking at some jewelry we end up in the childrens isle.... Niece is having a baby girl.... So we start looking at little girls dresses and I'm pulling them off the rack saying "Ohhh this is really cute" and she grabbing them and putting them in the cart..... We had a greatest time buying dresses together!!! lol And when I get home she hands me the DVD set for Stargate SG-1 Season 10 that she picked up this afternoon!!!! Now that's love!!! hehe

Karren

[SandyR]

Karen,

I think you and the Mrs...are "re-connecting" Its good. Mine won't shop for her self alone, cause she trust my taste in womens cloths......

Hugs.

SandyR

PS - I love Star Gate!

[Jodie Wexler]

Actually, I think the original "Hair Spray" (1988) was wonderful and didn't need to be remade. I don't think it could be improved upon.

It starred Ricki Lake, Divine, Sonny Bono, Deborah Harry and others.

If you haven't seen it, you should make a trip to the video store and rent it!

I agree 100%. These gems of B-Movie history do not need the big Hollywood treatment. It often waters down the original premise and story. Big budget remakes does not mean better movies.

[Nylonkaren]

Sounds like a movie to see just for fun. I don't mind going in drab, that is how I dress most of the time. I just want to see the movie. I think you need to go to a different theatre the same night yourself if possible.

[Country girl]

I don't think Karren really cares whether she sees the movie.

Karren, That's great about you and your wife shopping and her surprising you with the Stargate series. :hugs: CG GG

[Sheri 4242]

Jeez... someone get me a bucket :puke: (or you both get a room)...

:lol2: Okay, I give! I give! :lol2:

So, my bad, you are the wit and wisdom and Karren is your apprentice . . . :lol2: . . . I just wish I had read your response either before I ate or long after I had eaten :tongueout !

(PS: what happened to that photo you had in your signature area? It so'oooo reminded me of one of the actresses that was in a Hugh Grant movie! Too, cute! H'mmm - maybe we need a larger room! :D )

[LilSissyStevie]

Actually, I think the original "Hair Spray" (1988) was wonderful and didn't need to be remade. I don't think it could be improved upon.

I saw it Sunday with my wife and two of my daughters. It's not a remake of the original movie but an adaptation of the stage musical which was an adaptation of the original John Waters film. So it's two adaptations removed from the original and there are a lot of changes to the story besides just the singing and dancing. I thought the music was unmemorable (because I can't remember any of it!) but the fashions were to die for. This movie is petticoat and crinoline heaven! I'll buy the video just for that. The crossdressing John Travolta has a much bigger part in this movie than Devine had and kind of steals the show.

Something bothered me about this version that wasn't clear to me until later. There was the stale, musty smell of political correctness about this film that contrasted with the radical individualism of the John Waters version. John Waters got his point across without lecturing the audience. I like the original better but I'll still get this one for the petticoats.

[Joy Carter]

I agree 100%. These gems of B-Movie history do not need the big Hollywood treatment. It often waters down the original premise and story. Big budget remakes does not mean better movies.

Allot of remakes around these past few years. I can't wait for the re-remake of Lassie. You know Lassie was really a boy.:D

[AmberTG]

OH YA!! A classic indeed! My ex has the movie on video tape and I got it for her on DVD a couple years ago. I've seen it several times, Divine did a great "over-the-top" job in that movie. I've seen the trailer for the new version several times and it does look good, I didn't know it was John Travolta at first, they did his make-up really well. There's some other big stars in this version also.
There's another B movie with Divine in it that I saw a long time ago called "Lust in the Dust", it was pretty funny at the time.

[Sheri 4242]

Jeez... someone get me a bucket (or you both get a room)...

Okay, so maybe I wasn't as funny as I thought, but . . .


(PS: what happened to that photo you had in your signature area? It so'oooo reminded me of one of the actresses that was in a Hugh Grant movie! Too, cute! H'mmm - maybe we need a larger room!

I see you changed your signature photo back, and I've got to say (a.) it does remind me of that actress -- I'm going to go to a movie database and find out who she is, b/c (b.) she IS really, really cute -- and the two of you could be twins!!! I'm trying to remember which Hugh Grant movie she was in. You got any ideas on which one I am talking about???

[Sharon]

I don't understand why you assume the worse of your wife in not wanting you to go to the movie with her and your daughter. While you may be correct in your feelings, it is also possible that she just wants to spend time alone her child.

And there's also the possibility that, since you like to wear skirts, she may as well wear the pants in the family and just start dictating the rules. :p

[Tamara Croft]

I'm trying to remember which Hugh Grant movie she was in. You got any ideas on which one I am talking about???No idea, take your pick: - http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000424/

[Karren H]

I don't understand why you assume the worse of your wife in not wanting you to go to the movie with her and your daughter. While you may be correct in your feelings, it is also possible that she just wants to spend time alone her child.

And there's also the possibility that, since you like to wear skirts, she may as well wear the pants in the family and just start dictating the rules. :p

Now that's funny for a couple reasons... She owns maybe one skirt and one dress.. All she wears are womwns jeans, hence my lack of love for anything denimish... And I affectionetly refere to her as "She who must be obeyed".... Hehe... You must not be married, Sharon? And I'd love to meet a wife that wasn't in charge of her husband and family... Any man that thinks he's in charge is just fooling himself, IMHO!!!!

Ohhhhh and when my wife goes out of her way to tell me on 3 or 4 maybe 5 times in one week, when someone else brought it up, that I wasn't coming along.... Well let's just say it wasn't ment that they wanted to spend quality time together... Matter of fact, She can't wait till the daughter goes back to college.... She's had 2 months of quality time so far and she's going bonkers...

Karren

[noname]

Why not exclude her from a family outing for her being who she is. I doubt she'll have a problem with it as she understands that people sometimes need to be excluded.

[tommi]

Well If my wife want's to take the daughter then I'm fine with it.....

But talk about turn arounds.... Tonight, my wife said "Come on were going to TG Maxx shopping" So we get there and after looking at some jewelry we end up in the childrens isle.... Niece is having a baby girl.... So we start looking at little girls dresses and I'm pulling them off the rack saying "Ohhh this is really cute" and she grabbing them and putting them in the cart..... We had a greatest time buying dresses together!!! lol And when I get home she hands me the DVD set for Stargate SG-1 Season 10 that she picked up this afternoon!!!! Now that's love!!! hehe

Karren

SG-1 season 10 ,my wife would more likely give in to my dressing than buy me that.

[GlitterGG]

I think my wife and daughter would have a blast if Kandis went with them to the movie.. LOL..

Kandis:love:

Damn straight!!! I'd love to see it with Kandis. I think our daughter would probably get a kick out of it :happy:

[Sheri 4242]

No idea, take your pick: - http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000424/

I had no intention of hijacking this thread, but BEG appologies to insert something here that Tamara GG and I have been talking about in this thread. (Tamara started it by telling Karren and me to "get a room." :tongueout )

Anyway, the actress I was talking about earlier is Emma Chambers -- who's name should be instantly reconizable in the UK!!!

A RL photo is difficult to find, but that said, go to http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/womanshour/2002_25_fri_03.shtml to see Emma's pic, or to http://movies.groups.yahoo.com/group/emma_emma_or_alice/. If you go to imdb and pull up the movie Notting Hill, you'll see a tiny photo of Emma (who played Hugh Grant's sister) -- but her makeup was rather exagerated in the movie (on purpose) to make her seem sort of delightfully ditzy. She is also very well-known to BBC and U.S. PBS fans b/c of her role in The Vicar of Dibley.

One thing I have learned about Emma Chambers is that she is NO ditz!!! As one reviewer wrote, "In the flesh she's . . . (b)right as a button with large blue eyes and the sort of grin which melts the hardest heart. The actress who stars in recent Julia Roberts hit Notting Hill loves working on any project . . ."

Oh, FYI: Emma Chambers comes from Westcliff-on-Sea, Essex. I think from her various available photos, it is easy to see that she is a beautiful woman who has a playful side -- and her various bio's show a woman who loves her work and is highly intelligent.


HIJACK OVER -- HIJACK OVER -- HIJACK OVER -- (((WHAT DO YOU NEVER SAY IN AN AIRPORT? "Hi, Jack."))) -- HIJACK OVER -- HIJACK OVER . . . :D

[AmberTG]

Well, I must say that I'm enjoying this thread! even the sniping on the side is entertaining in a way. Methinks "someone" was having a bad day when the sniping started.
Karren, if I lived in your area, I'd go with you to see the movie, how often do you get a chance to see John Travolta in drag?
The theater trailer that I've seen made it look pretty entertaining.

[Fab Karen]

Eh, see the original John Waters movie, the musical is yet another Hollywood watered-down version for the masses.
Travolta had a ton of latex glued on to look like that.

Just tell your wife you've planned some father-daughter time renting a movie...it's called "Breakfast on Pluto":tongueout

[NewBetty]

Don't wait 'til it hits the DVD's. If you really want to see it, go by yourself, heck with the wife!

Or you could rent the original movie version John Waters directed.
It's merely one of my favorite movies... ever.

[Fab Karen]

Option #1: She's still afraid this CD thing you do that she knows naught of will explode and you'll turn into a singing, dancing, twinkling guy in a dress by being exposed to said thing. No need to encourage you with a positive role model :D Or it may be contagious. I notice the son is still on the maybe list.

Hmm, let's examine these concepts: Personally, I very rarely sing. I do enjoy dancing. I only twinkle on somewhat rare occasion, when wearing a sparkly or glittery outfit.:D

[Sheri 4242]

Well, I must say that I'm enjoying this thread! even the sniping on the side is entertaining in a way.

I hope nobody thinks Tamara and I were sniping b/c we weren't. We were having a "fun sidebar." I was truly complimenting Tamara b/c I think she and the British actress Emma Chambers could be related!!! To each their own, but I think Emma Chambers is cute, funny, and highly talented! Before I edited this post I originally asked, "Did I miss somebody else sniping?" Then I started reading the "revolution" threads and it struck me that maybe somebody thought the complimentary exchange I was having on this thread was being used to continue that conflicted exchange which got rather ugly. So, first, my exchange with Tamara on this thread (with Karren on the sidelines) was sincere with a hint of the humorous. Second, I am sorry the revolutin thread is closed b/c, after reading it, I have something to say as an American, conservatively socialized, and highly educated in the law, psychology, and political science. (Sher had a brag post, so I'll make one, too!!!) That said, I have to say as a well-traveled American, that I understand why many Americans are called "ugly Americans" to many of our allies -- and the term is often deserved I am sad to say. Furthermore, while we Americans, as a society, seem to think we have a corner on fundamental rights, we often don't truly appreciate the legal limitations of our own system.

At any rate, my goal in the exchange Tamara and I were having in this thread had nothing to do with sniping, or with the "revolution" threads. It was simply just a light-hearted and sincere excange and not to be used to futher anyone's agenda to the contrary!!! (And I think Tamara will agree with this assessment.)

[Kendra Irene]

Karren
I just saw the movie and I think the reason your wife didn't want you along is that she didn't want to be embarrassed when you start to sing along with John, at the theatre.:D

:<3:Kendra

[Angie G]

I think I'd stay home and dress :hugs:
Angie

[Karren H]

I don't think Karren really cares whether she sees the movie.
CG GG

Not really.... I figure I'll see it some day.... and my wife made it clear that I wasn't coming along again last night....


Now, Karren, I'm curious in what ways she might think you are limiting her freedom to feel justified limiting yours the way she does?

Well, marriage is a compramise... and if that equates to mutually limiting each others freedom....... But I get my freedoms... get to play ice hockey when ever I want!! :D Within reason... when were not doing something family wise... with her permission..... Which is very important to me....

Karren

[Robin Leigh]

I still think she's being a bit unfair, bossing you around like that, Karren. But you two seem to have a compromise that works... until one of your kids stumbles across your vast net presence. :devil:

:hugs:

Robin

[Tamara Croft]

Methinks "someone" was having a bad day when the sniping started.Methinks "someone" was perhaps having a bit of a giggle...

Sheri... I can't figure out how you think I look like her lol!!!

Oops... sorry, hijacked again *slaps self*

[Sheri 4242]

:thumbsup:


I still think she's being a bit unfair, bossing you around like that, Karren. But you two seem to have a compromise that works... until one of your kids stumbles across your vast net presence.Robin

Robin: That is a very astute observation!!! Relationships have to come down to what works for the two involved -- and there is an art to compromising!!! Often people tend to think life is a "one size fits all" type of thing, but it isn't. And, just as each one of us is different and unique, so are our corporate selves (presuming one looks at marriage as a three-fold being: the two individuals and their combined identity). I really liked the way you stated what you did in your post, b/c as long as it works for Karren and her wife, then that's great regardless of whether or not any of us think it is fair or unfair!!! Great post!!!!!!!

:thumbsup:

[Marcie Sexton]

Perhaps it a little fear, or envy, or.....or...uhhhh, heck who knows, I guess thats what makes a woman a woman...

[Jodi Lynn]

I get the same reaction from my wife whenever a crossdresser is on TV. She will say something about the only reason I want to watch is because of the crossdresser in the show. Then she will say something about how it is sick.

[Sally2005]

Could it be that the wife GG wants to test the waters about the CDing thing with daughter GG and if its cool drag daddy CD out on adventure sometime?

[jenniferj]

What you are seeing is the one-dimensional definition (in your wife's eyes) of you as a crossdresser - she is assuming that any interest in the film that you might have is simply that of comparing notes with another guy in drag.

I hate to admit my age, but when "Tootsie" first came out my sweet wife and I went to see it at my suggestion. She wasn't happy - it took a while to convince her that:

1. I have seen every Dustin Hoffman film.
2. I think Jessica Lange is hot.

This may take some time- eventually she will see that the crossdressing is but one part of the multifaceted person she married. (and loves)

jj

[LisaDelNorte]

I experience similar roadblocks from my wife. She is understanding of my GID and knows quite a bit about the subject, but she doesn't want to be part of anything that may encourage me. However, I must admit that when we are surprised by a transgender "episode," such as happened when we rented Anothy Hopkins' movie "The World's Fastest Indian," she is not reactionary. It is only when there is advance knowledge that she will be opposed to seeing the program or movie. BTW, the portrayal of a TG in the movie is very positive, if you haven't seen it, rent it!

[occdresser]

that movie will be on my list of "top ten movies to see before I die"