talking about crossdressing at work

[occdresser]

first of all nobody would ever guess that I am a crodresser, so every once in a while the subject would come up about "those crossdressers". Usually the conversations are very short. My boss in training brought it up one time and he said that they should stay on the opposite side of town. I told him do you have a problem with them, not sarcasticly, he said no problem at all. Any way, the question is what did you say to a coworker when the subject of crossdressing was brought up!;)

[Michelle S]

I ask what they think about Giuliani. It opens up the conversation without it looking like it might be about me.

I did have a conversation with two friends of mine - they are a couple - about cross dressing (in general, they don't know I CD). They are very liberal and were sympathetic but you could hear a sense of pity in their voices. They knew CDers have an inner need, but it was still something they *felt* was very strange. I did not know what to do with that. They do not have that kind of tone when talking about gays. This was several months ago.

This weekend he gave her a surprise birthday party. I got her a pair or earrings. She and all the other women really loved them. One said I could make a living helping husbands and boyfriends buy gifts. Some day I'll probably tell them.

[CherylKCCD]

Whenever the subject comes up I say " It doesn't make them a bad person."

[angelfire]

I usually say something like "Well, emo/scene guys my age wear women's pants and it seems to be the style, so who cares?"

[Dayna]

I recently transferred to a new department at work; I am the only guy among seven women. We all went out for drinks one night, and they said to me, "Tell us about yourself..." I told them I was married, two kids, I ride a bike... "Anything else?" "Well, let's see...I've been a crossdresser since I was a teenager, but it will take a lot more booze before I tell you about THAT..."

They all had a good laugh, subject changed, and I just smiled to myself-- I am willing to bet I was wearing prettier panties than ANY of them!

[Ashley Lynn Swift]

well when it comes up at work, which is usually just about everyday weather its somebody calling me be my femme (work) name, which they voted on last friday "Katie" and i can't stand it my names not Katie it's Taylor, i usually make a joke out of the topic whatever it is that they said (namely the 17 year old little S*** host Kraig who i inturn named him katlen, whichever body loves.) like i wonder if I would get better Tips if i came in all dolled up, or even better what would the Manager's reaction be, one of our managers is very homophobic Lol~

[Sarah Plumber]

My normal response is "good luck to them".."what ever floats your boat".."as long as it's in the right place at the right time".

If it's my wife I'm talking to about any sexuality/gender issues which did come up recently I said that I admire anybody who can openly express their sexuality.....and I do ......She knows about me and she knows that I wish I had the courage to to follow suit.

[Angie G]

It's been talked about mostly as a joke :hugs:
Angie

[Kate Simmons]

A few years back (before I retired) I was talking to a co-worker and he said he was going on vacation. I asked where and he told me that he and his wife were going to Providencetown while Fantasia Fair was going on. Playing dumb I asked him what that was. He said the whole town is full of crossdressers and he and his wife liked seeing them, meeting them and taking pictures. Evidently, they were fascinated by the whole thing. I asked if he ever dressed up and he told me no. I asked what he thought of the guys who did and he said:" They are beautiful and most are great people". Nice to know we are appreciated by some people.:happy:

[Joy Carter]

Just some advice to those who are thinking about coming out. "DON'T !"
You have no idea how cruel people who you have known for years can be.

[Jocelyn Quivers]

I usually hold my tongue and remain silent. For fear that I might out myself. Jocelyn

[gennee]

I haven't come out to my coworkers about my crossdressing (and won't) but if I told them they would probably be shocked.


Gennee

:D

[occdresser]

Just some advice to those who are thinking about coming out. "DON'T !"
You have no idea how cruel people who you have known for years can be.

thanks for the advice, I have never considered it, ever!

[SexySteph]

I carry one of those satchels, messenger bags to work and my female co-workers call it my "murse" or man purse. They are always calling me a metrosexual and things. They asked me if I would ever get my eyebrows waxed. My response was I already do on occasion. The conversation turned to CD'ing and they both were of the opinion to each their own. Admitting to them I wax my eyebrows was one thing but I wasn't about to fess up to wearing panties. I agree you have to be careful around work gossip travels fast.

[Rhonda480]

It always seems to evoke pity. I guess that is why it is so hard to follow through. But so far I have not been in a position to voice my opinion and unfortunatly i am not sure what i would say at this point.

I really love the responses so far....thanks for the thread!

[Darla in Pa.]

I't is a very scary thing to think that we are more or less controlled by other peoples opinions or values. And i for one do which I believe creates a lot more stress in my life (but excitement to) Burning at the stake for infractions out of the normal guidelines of society has been banned for centuries so it has gotten better. (VBS)

Darla

[Sweet Jane]

ummmm..I have found normally the most ignorant boors are the ones with all the opinions on crossdressing or sexuality. We have one at work and the last time he ranted off, when there were CDs on TV, I sort of said to him... "why are you getting so defensive. It doesnt worry me if you crossdress"....hahahahahaha

[Stephenie S]

OK, here's what I did.

When the subject came up and someone said, "Oh, that's disgusting, or whatever", I said, "Why is that so disgusting, I do it."

Well that got some conversation going, let me tell you. I just kept saying, "Yes, I do that sometimes, what's so bad about it?" I kept insisting that they tell me WHY it was wrong or bad or whatever. Of course, when it comes right down to it, there isn't anything wrong with it and it's pretty hard to argue against CDing. People wanted to say, "I don't know, it's just wrong." Which, of course, is a pretty stupid position to take in an argument. After a while, people at work just got used to it, and now almost everyone knows.

One thing in my favor was that I am fairly well liked at work. I am a hard worker, and popular, so it was hard for people to say I was somehow a bad person, when obviously, I was not a bad person at all. Not everyone has this advantage at work, but I think it helped me tremendously. Now SOME people at work think I am insane, and some think I am imoral, but most don't care a bit, or are supportive. I think that most people in the world are like that and that most of our fears are only in our heads and not in other people's minds.

Lovies,
Stephenie

[Rachel Morley]

I gotta be honest ... at work? .... it's never ever come up. Out of work though, a few years ago, "in a past life" so to speak before I was married and living in the US, it came up a couple of times socially and the people who were discussing it were really not knowing what they were talking about. They're conversation was short and they kept adding stuff about drag queens as if the two were similar or the same. :rolleyes: Me? ... I said nothing much except one thing. "I thought that typically drag queens tend to be gay men, whereas I think crossdressers just do it for the clothes."

Obviously, I was playing to the crowd and trying not to go into too much detail or give myself away.

[Michelle S]

I am reminded of the first time a friend told me he was gay. As a 19 year old college student (late 1970's) I was fairly homophobic. He was telling me about his ex-roommate, what a great guy he was, and then said rather bluntly, "we were both homos". (Obviously he had self acceptance issues as I would learn later.) I sat up, my back was stiffened and my eyes widened, looking outward, not toward him. I thought for a minute and decided there really wasn't anything wrong with it and relaxed.

[Sinthia]

A few years ago when Pres. Clinton said: 'Don't ask, don't tell' a few of us at work were talking about that statement, and gays in general. We all knew several gays at work, and all of them, both male and female, were widely accepted by everyone at work. One young fellow in the department that I worked in said one day a friend of his said: 'Well, Steve, you realize that I am gay.' Steve said he looked at the guy for a few seconds and replied . . . 'We have been friends for three years and you were gay all this time, so it can't make any difference to me.'

I love that answer. You know someone, for a while or a long time, and you base your friendship on your feelings for that person. Not whether they do not like sports, drive redneck trucks, or wear panties and bras. The few people that I have come out to, or who have heard of my activity, also seem to feel the same. They liked me before they found put, so it can't matter.

[trannie T]

Several years ago some of my coworkers were talking about their strangest sexual encounters. One guy, a rookie, told about the transvestite he'd met. He became very upset about the abuse he received from the others. I heard about it after the incident, glad I didn't have to break up a fight.

[Leah B]

Personally, I'd have no problem with people at work knowing. I'd happily make myself an example, just to get that many more people to think about tranny issues, and perhaps to convert a few more to our side.

That is I would let people at work know, except that Sobe is set against it, for reasons I'll never understand or agree with. But I respect her wishes here (after all, she doesn't totally get my CDing either).

Still, it's frustrating to have to lie about it (and I have had to directly lie about it at least once, and be dodgy on plenty of other occasions).