Question for M2F AND F2M Only

[Sheila]

"How do you percieve the gender you dress as, and how do you relate and incorparate that into your dressing ?" and is that perception based on a particular person in your life or on several ?

added .-------to clarify what i mean

I am more intersted in the perception that you have of the inner gender you dress as ........ in otherwords as a M2F how do you see gentic women, their strenghts, weakness, their dreams and desires, hopes and aspirations. As a F2M, how do you see gentic men, their strenghts, weakness, their dreams, desires, hopes and aspirations

[JOEY88]

the gender i dress as is female,i incorporate that by dressing as one and putting in my fem persona into what i ware the best i can describe that persona as is like Regina Specktor she a music artist

[Kate Simmons]

Hi Jess, I think it's just what a feminine "me" would be like. It's me but me represented as total freedom to be myself. Kind of hard to explain. If I patterned myself after anyone, it was my Grandma who was an independent and spunky woman. As far as my "mannerisms", most of them were learned from observing my wife for over 25 years, who is a very feminine woman but independent in her own right. Kind of the best of both with some of my own thrown in. Anything but "typical" for sure.:happy:

[dakota_ann69]

Hi Jess, as I am not completely out of the closet yet it's hard for me to say. To me it is my femme side and that is my state of mind as I dress, as for people I admire for me that would be my SO, even though I cannot dress in front of her I take note of ever facet of how she looks everyday and try and reflect that in my appearance.

[Trinni]

I am also not out of the closet and I have to agree with dakota_ann69 when she states her femme side and it is a female state of mind. Because of that, I don't have anyone my perception comes from.

[Veronica Fallon]

Hi Jess,

I feel my femininity almost all the time to a large degree, dressed or not. It's just a major part of who I am, & dressing only reinforces & enhances the feelings. The more done-up I am, the deeper I feel as a woman & the more it comes through in my persona. I guess I perceive femininity partly from the real part that's inside of me, & partly from my fascinated observation of women throughout my life. I like to think of my feminine self as having qualities of many women I've admired through the years.

However, my look was recently compared to Sandra Bullock, who wouldn't be a bad role-model for us if you think about it- she's got some definite masculine vibes going on, & yet she's all woman!! :gorgeous: I only wish I had her confidence!

I hope I perceived your question correctly...

Veronica

[Carin]

I used to percieve my gender expression through clothing as female gender, not based on anyone in particular.

However, my perception now is based on me, and i have a hard time expressing what that is (see my confused (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=65574) thread).

[Carroll]

For me, its, well me. When I am dressed I perceive myself as 80% of Carroll and 20%Chris mixed in there. I do tend to take more of a female attitude when I am dressed. When I am in male mode, which is more often, its about 60% Carroll and 40% Chris. I tend to have a lot of female mannerisms that, for me, are normal. Thats why sometimes people get the impression I might be gayish. Ist that what you are looking for?

[PaulaJaneThomas]

"How do you percieve the gender you dress as, and how do you relate and incorparate that into your dressing ?" and is that perception based on a particular person in your life or on several ?

I'm just me. A mix of both genders I suppose.

[Sheila]

For me, its, well me. When I am dressed I perceive myself as 80% of Carroll and 20%Chris mixed in there. I do tend to take more of a female attitude when I am dressed. When I am in male mode, which is more often, its about 60% Carroll and 40% Chris. I tend to have a lot of female mannerisms that, for me, are normal. Thats why sometimes people get the impression I might be gayish. Ist that what you are looking for?

not really but I it was the bad wording of my question that has brought about your reply, for that I am sorry I am more intersted in the perception that you have of the inner gender you dress as ........ in otherwords as a M2F how do you see gentic women, their strenghts, weakness, their dreams and desires, hopes and aspirations....... hope that clears it up

[Ashly]

.....
I feel my femininity almost all the time to a large degree, dressed or not. .....

That's exactly how I feel too

[Sheri 4242]

"How do you percieve the gender you dress as, and how do you relate and incorparate that into your dressing ?" and is that perception based on a particular person in your life or on several ?

Jess,

This is an interesting question, though it contains some complexities. I would have to say, to answer the last part of your inquiry first, that there is no particular person which my dressing is based upon. Maybe several people, but too many to name.

What I perceive is also fluid -- IOW, it has been changing as far as what I relate to.

I think, though, that perhaps what you are really seeking is where I was for a very long time -- which was as an older teenager -- late high school or college coed, and with an "attitude" as far as clothing style! Frankly, I think this is normal for many of us: we get "stuck," if you will, at an age where we truly wished to dress as the GG's of that day and era. While my CDing goes back to my earliest of memories (and short denim skirts -- for which I still have an affinity), I recall vividly my high school days and the popularity of miniskirts and minidresses of that time (mid-to-late sixties). I oh so ever wanted to dress like the girls I knew then!!! I honestly believe I was "stuck" in this mode for a very, very long time!!! Some called this style "elegantly sl#tty," and I guess it was!!!

Only in recent years have I started switching to more age-appropriate clothing, thanks in no small part to my wife. Some still borders on the too-short category, but my wife has shown me a world of stylish clothing that is age-appropriate while being sexy and chic!!!

Unfortunately, the whole way along this journey I tend to gravitate towards expensive clothing. At least now that I am heading towards this new style, I have found a wardrobe consutant to help me with my sizes (and I never even have to directly interact with this consultant, though she is always available if I want to contact her).

[Marla S]

I am more intersted in the perception that you have of the inner gender you dress as ........ in otherwords as a M2F how do you see gentic women, their strenghts, weakness, their dreams and desires, hopes and aspirations. As a F2M, how do you see gentic men, their strenghts, weakness, their dreams, desires, hopes and aspirations

GGs in general are more adequate role models than GMs to me.
In that they are an inspiration, but nothing I'd be able to copy or to emulate ... and I don't try to ... not anymore.
The GGs' world is a complete different world with desirable aspects, aspects to envy, aspects to dream about, but also aspects that are not so desirable.
The GMs' world is one that is by far less desirable.
I am a GM, nothing will change that, but try to eke out a similar degree of freedom to express my feminine aspects like GGs have to express their more masculine aspects.

[maryjanecapri]

i try not to think of me having a gender. i just go about my "mary" way placing myself happily in the middle. part of me is female and part of me is male. and i try to dress to reflect that. confusing? sure. but it comforts me most times.

[DanaJ]

This may not answer your question, but I am me - I don't change personas when I am en femme or drab. When I try to affect a more feminine mind set when dressed, it just doesn't feel right to me. So, in short - I just stay the same whether in male or female appearance.

[Jillm]

Jess, your question is very complex, and to answer fully I could probably write a book, but to keep it simple; I crossdress because I feel more comfortable in a dress than a shirt and tie, I don’t think I could ever understand the inner gender of a gg. I think every person; male or female has different strengths, weakness, dreams and desires, hopes and aspirations. I think the only way I could know that information is if I knew that person. I was never inspired by anyone, when it comes to dressing. I was a teen in the 80’s so I find that I like to dress 80’s type styles. Whenever I put on black pantyhose and a pair of shorts, my SO always tells me the 80’s are over, move on. So I guess in that aspect I incorporate an era into my dressing not a person.

Jill

[sissystephanie]

Hi Jess, I think it's just what a feminine "me" would be like. It's me but me represented as total freedom to be myself. Kind of hard to explain. If I patterned myself after anyone, it was my Grandma who was an independent and spunky woman. As far as my "mannerisms", most of them were learned from observing my wife for over 25 years, who is a very feminine woman but independent in her own right. Kind of the best of both with some of my own thrown in. Anything but "typical" for sure.:happy:

Salandra is right on! When I am dressed, it is very much the "feminine" me! However, when dressed I do want to be like the GG's around me. As long as they are class action GG's! I want no part of being perceived as a "tart" or "****."

Sissy

Mor Girl than man sometimes

[Sheri 4242]

I am more intersted in the perception that you have of the inner gender you dress as ........ in otherwords as a M2F how do you see gentic women, their strenghts, weakness, their dreams and desires, hopes and aspirations

Jess,

I guess I answered your question incorrectly -- or rather I thought you were looking for a different kind of response. Now that I understand, let me take another stab at providing you with a reply . . .

I have a difficult time stating my perceptions b/c of the complexities of what "makes" a mtf crossdresser. That said, there are a number of GG's that are inspirational to me b/c of their overall femininity. There are some GG's that don't fit into this equation -- for example my mother (which I realize is in diametrically opposed contrast to a great many on here).

Dana said:

This may not answer your question, but I am me - I don't change personas when I am en femme or drab. When I try to affect a more feminine mind set when dressed, it just doesn't feel right to me. So, in short - I just stay the same whether in male or female appearance.

A small part of my answer would mirror what Dana saiys, but a larger part would not. I do feel there are two distinct personnas within one -- this is why I have often said on here that I have a dichotomous personna. A more feminine mindset does feel right to me!!! But Dana nailed it when she said, "but I am me . . ." -- IMHO, we are all different, and what makes "me feel like me" is not necessarily going to be what makes Dana feel like Dana. We both have two different mindsets to get to the same end, which is true for all of us to some greater or lesser degree!!!

In the main, along the lines of what Jill said, I crossdress because I feel more comfortable in bra and panties, and a skirt, than I do in a shirt and tie! Likewise, I don’t think I could ever fully understand the true "inner woman" of a GG -- but I know I have certain feminine aspects to my very being that are natural -- and thus I partially understand this "in the natural" -- or, better said, my sense of "the natural."

Marla, in part, said:

The GGs' world is a complete different world with desirable aspects, aspects to envy, aspects to dream about, but also aspects that are not so desirable. The GMs' world is one that is by far less desirable.

I can relate to that sentiment in total!!! I do think we are all struck by the "grass is always greener" mindset -- so living it would not be all that we probably perceive!!!

Hope all of this is a better response than my first post!!!

[Zee]

How I perceive genetic females?... Wow, that is a question that I could take all day to answer.

In a nut shell: I see genetic females as:
Wonderful
Complex
Beautiful
Heavenly
Emotional (in a good way)
Pleasing to look at
Incredible
Diverse personalities

In no way is this a comprehensive list, but you get the idea.

[bi_weird]

Alright I'll weigh in from the ftm side of things, how I view gms. What a great question...
Well my view of guys is largely based on my brothers and dad, as those are the guys I've always known best. They're pretty stereotypical, I suppose. Beer and football and all that masculine bravado. But it's a lot more than that. Guys, the sort that I find myself wanting to emulate, have a real dependable streak. The guys who I care about most and want to be like the most are people who I know will be there for anything, and that includes when I need a shoulder to cry on. They take care of each other and sacrifice themselves for their family/friends/SO. There's a genuine want to be a caretaker.
Hrm dreams hopes and desires. That's hard to think about. The guys in my life aren't exactly talkative about those sorts of mushy things. That's actually a character trait I've moved away from purposfully in recent years - I used to be really closed up, but found it stifling and unhealthy.
So yeah, I guess in most ways I'm going for typical guy, but I want to be one of the good guys, and I don't want to be as closed off as many guys tend to be. I feel like there was more to this response, but I've lost it. Maybe I'll wander back over here later.

[Sweet Jane]

Jess...I am just me..I know lots of people don't understand that...I am a starnge femme/man mix and when I dress, I just dress for me...I don't think of femme qualities. Everyone has their good and not so good points, man and lady.....I tend not to pidgeonhole peoples traits by gender..I have seen sensitive guys and brutal women????.....I prefer to just judge me, as odd as I am

[DanielMacBride]

What a great question! :) And some interesting answers, too.

For me, I am male and dress that way all the time now (although only very recently out). I grew up with 2 brothers (one older, one younger) and my dad was not what I'd call a great role model (violent and a bully to be polite about it), but I guess my perception of the male gender is pretty much a combination of what comes naturally to me, my brothers' behaviours and a few other males who I consider role models.

I haven't really spent a lot of time specifically observing GMs to determine masculine behaviour or traits as I seem to have a lot of these naturally, but what I observe about males that I try to incorporate into myself, I would call more genderless traits. If you want an idea of one of my biggest role models, its John Butler - he is a dedicated family man, passionate about life and his music, vocal about the things he believes in, and not afraid to show his softer and more emotional side (yet he does it without being a sissy or overly feminine). I can't really articulate it but that is a man I aspire to being like :D

Daniel

[Emily Ann Brown]

I agree with everyone....awesome question dear.

I dress because my head sings a female song. I am really no different except for the clothes which tell everyone around what gender I am feeling. I am gentle and sensitive by nature (a definite female strength) and love children (need I elaborate on that one?). I love color and expressive clothes (ex really didn't want a "dandy")...women are so interesting in their wardrobe while I always felt repressed as a guy in what I "COULD" wear. I enjoy art and crafts and sewing and flowers and decorating....any one interest can be "male" but all together I become a nesting female (thank goodness females want to because the macho guys can't hardly feed themselves much less provide a home environment for a family).

Answer the question better?


Emily Ann

[Angie G]

Hay girl that's way to much thinking I just want to drerss :hugs:
Angie

[Karren H]

Huh? Well call me shallow.... I just like to wear womens clothes!! Lol. Ohh and their makeup, hair.. Jewelry.. Shoes... Accessories!!!

I feel like myself no matter what gender I'm dressed as... Maybe caught between two genders.. I don't know... But I never I dwell on it.. Its just something I enjoy (enjoyed) doing.. Plain and simple....

Karren

[Nigella]

I dont percieve anyone as a specific gender, there are enough people out there to do that for us.

We are taught from an early age to "recognise" a "girl" or a "boy", and that teaching stays with us.

I try to, and very often do, see each and everyone I meet as an individual, making no assumptions as to who, what or why they are, just accepting them as they are.

Makes sense, if so let me know!!!

:love:

[Chantelle CD]

"How do you percieve the gender you dress as, and how do you relate and incorparate that into your dressing ?" and is that perception based on a particular person in your life or on several ?

added .-------to clarify what i mean

I am more intersted in the perception that you have of the inner gender you dress as ........ in otherwords as a M2F how do you see gentic women, their strenghts, weakness, their dreams and desires, hopes and aspirations. As a F2M, how do you see gentic men, their strenghts, weakness, their dreams, desires, hopes and aspirations

Agree, good thread dear!!

How do i perceive the gender i dress as?

I perceive woman as beautiful, soft, graceful, elegant, nurturing, giving, emotionally open, sexy, alive and full of expression. This view is not based on any one woman, or group of woman, but the way i see all woman have the power to be, when they feel good.

How do you relate and incorporate that into your dressing ?

Like most have said, its just me, all those things i feel inside, not to say that chantelle is full of herself <giggles> but she is the opposite of what i can focus my male self as, everyday, i am a mix of the 2, more so the male, mostly because the world , makes me be that way, if i had my way, i would ebb and flow between the 2 as situations called for, or as my feelings wanted to be expressed at any one moment.

[flatlander_48]

Alright I'll weigh in from the ftm side of things, how I view gms. What a great question...
Well my view of guys is largely based on my brothers and dad, as those are the guys I've always known best. They're pretty stereotypical, I suppose. Beer and football and all that masculine bravado. But it's a lot more than that. Guys, the sort that I find myself wanting to emulate, have a real dependable streak. The guys who I care about most and want to be like the most are people who I know will be there for anything, and that includes when I need a shoulder to cry on. They take care of each other and sacrifice themselves for their family/friends/SO. There's a genuine want to be a caretaker.
Hrm dreams hopes and desires. That's hard to think about. The guys in my life aren't exactly talkative about those sorts of mushy things. That's actually a character trait I've moved away from purposfully in recent years - I used to be really closed up, but found it stifling and unhealthy.
So yeah, I guess in most ways I'm going for typical guy, but I want to be one of the good guys, and I don't want to be as closed off as many guys tend to be. I feel like there was more to this response, but I've lost it. Maybe I'll wander back over here later.

It is a protection mechanism. If we exhibit vulnerability, we may be viewed as weak.

[BarbaraTalbot]

I was a closeted dresser. I thought it a bit weird, but didnt realy want to put conscious thought into discerning a motivation. Frankly, I was a little fearful of what I might find in the dark recesses of the closet.

I now have the benefit of all I have learned very recently, mostly from other's on this very forum. In hindsight I would say that one of the reasons I never dressed in total in the last 38 years since the first time, is I feared that I might somehow magically become a girl in some way. I realize this isn't rational, but this thinking for me is rooted in the very confused psyche of a 3-4 year old being lectured on Mosaic law as found in Deuteronomy.

Now that I think the motivation is to become a girl for a short while the question becomes, which girl? I really think that hasn't changed for me in all these years. It is my older sister I want to be, but the young joyful version, before my parent's abuse cause her to withdraw a bit into herself. I want to be en femme, who she should have become. She is genetically me with 2 "X" chromosomes. She is bright, pretty, petite, tender, and was the one holding me in my memories and in childhood photos, rather than my mom. She always appreciated my little jokes, even made my favored genre of humorous expression the subject of her master's thesis.

I wish I could share all this and my admiration for her in this context, but circumstances in her life have been such that although I think she would not in anyway attempt to shame me, she would feel burdened by the knowledge.

[Carol123]

I feel totally female when i dress, inspiration comes from every woman i have ever known, or worked with and most of which have been very good role models

[DonnaT]

I feel no different, and don't perceive anyone differently, genderwise, when I dress. I am the same in either mode. A transgendered guy.

[mistunderstood]

As a F2M I identify all male but yet all of my role models are strong women. I believe in women libers so to speak. As A male I all ways watch other males and try to copy what I see mind you the good stuff. Like being courtiest,consiterite, kind and just show some manners. But I do like to be rude when I am hanging out with friends like rude jokes I like dirty stories and smash'em up things.
As for dreams right now I am so busy trying to be a guy that I have not thought about that.
As for there strengths Men are good at fixing things make snap decisiones . Weakness are quick to anger,judge others and sometimes the lack compation for others.

[Toyah]

"How do you percieve the gender you dress as, and how do you relate and incorparate that into your dressing ?" and is that perception based on a particular person in your life or on several ?

added .-------to clarify what i mean

I am more intersted in the perception that you have of the inner gender you dress as ........ in otherwords as a M2F how do you see gentic women, their strenghts, weakness, their dreams and desires, hopes and aspirations. As a F2M, how do you see gentic men, their strenghts, weakness, their dreams, desires, hopes and aspirations


Or not !!!!!
I think most women would find a guy dressing up like them as kinda offensive so I dress how I want to, not like someone else :hugs: