is it me or what? [Archive] - Crossdressers.com - #1 Community & Forum for Crossdressers, Family and Friends

CaptLex

08-30-2007, 04:42 PM

Ok to me or just the why my mind works, but it seams to me that f2m cd's have it a whole lot easier being out and at passing then m2f cd's do.

Missy
Yeah, Missy, it's you. Actually, let me correct that . . . it's not just you. This false idea and misconception goes around this place more often than a rabid, runaway panty thread. :rolleyes: I don't know where people get that idea, but it's not true. It's not a whole lot easier - it's not even a little bit easier. If you're not familiar with the hard times we go through because of our transgenderism, we'd be happy to enlighten you - or anyone who is really interested in learning, not just making assumptions.

Anyone can just drop in on any given day and pay a visit to our side of the fence, and if they can keep their mouth shut long enough to read and listen to our stories, they will see that it's just the other side of the same coin. I really don't understand all this "they have it easier" song-and-dance routine. :idontknow: Do any of you really want to live my life? I doubt it. I would happily lend it to any of you for a week and we'll see if you even make it that long.

The grass ain't always greener folks, but even if it was . . . why these comments? Why try to make us feel like you envy us? I don't get it. :wall:

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 04:52 PM

Yeah, Missy, it's you. Actually, let me correct that . . . it's not just you. This false idea and misconception goes around this place more often than a rabid, runaway panty thread. :rolleyes: I don't know where people get that idea, but it's not true. It's not a whole lot easier - it's not even a little bit easier. If you're not familiar with the hard times we go through because of our transgenderism, we'd be happy to enlighten you - or anyone who is really interested in learning, not just making assumptions.

Anyone can just drop in on any given day and pay a visit to our side of the fence, and if they can keep their mouth shut long enough to read and listen to our stories, they will see that it's just the other side of the same coin. I really don't understand all this "they have it easier" song-and-dance routine. :idontknow: Do any of you really want to live my life? I doubt it. I would happily lend it to any of you for a week and we'll see if you even make it that long.

The grass ain't always greener folks, but even if it was . . . why these comments? Why try to make us feel like you envy us? I don't get it. :wall:
:yt: everything he said is true, and more besides....trying being me and having a size 40F chest that i cant not bind well, try being me when im binding AND packing and i still get called 'she, her, ma'am'.....try being me that because of my body shape, clothes that i want to wear do not fit.....just try being me for 24hrs im sure you'll be screaming to go back...at least with M2Fs you can outwardly see what you are trying to achieve and 9 times out 10 you get the response you deserve...in the right manner because no one dare say anything else....yes you try being me!...time and time these threads keep coming up, and to be honest with you im sick of it, no one has it easier or better, we are all in the same boat fighting to fit in....:Angry3:

Kate Simmons

08-30-2007, 04:56 PM

Huh?

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 04:57 PM

Huh?yeah exactly Sal

Tamara Croft

08-30-2007, 04:58 PM

Ok to me or just the why my mind works, but it seams to me that f2m cd's have it a whole lot easier being out and at passing then m2f cd's do.

MissyWoW... just wow... what a statement to make!!!! This just emphasizes how many members here, are lacking awareness regarding the day to day life of a FTM CD/TS. Have you actually taken the time to read anything in this section (transman where you should have had the decency to post this) or the TS section? One can only presume that you have not, or you would know just how hard it is for them. To live through the days of sneers, gossip, being called a butch lesbian, laughed at, jeered at, not taken seriously… oh it’s just a phase and my most hated one ‘she’ll grow out of it’… I could go on, but I will not, because I already know what kind of life they have. If I were you, I’d catch up on some reading, because evidently, you do not actually have a clue do you?!?

Kris

08-30-2007, 05:03 PM

I would like to ask a few questions but do not want to offend anyone....... so I want to ask permission to ask a few questions FIRST......

Knowing that (hanging my head in shame) I have not read any of the TS or F2M parts of the site........

So the questions might be obvious.. but this just sparked a whole lot of thought... and questions.

That does not mean that I think the F2M's have it easier...

Kris

Daintre

08-30-2007, 05:04 PM

The Capt, and Kieron have given a very good answer. Rather than ask questions like this, maybe it would be a better idea to visit the other side and as the Capt eloquently said ....be quiet, read and learn. I think you will understand a lot more. I have read much of what is there and I can tell you I am impressed by how the guys handle the abuse and all the malarkey they deal with.

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 05:05 PM

Julie York

08-30-2007, 05:10 PM

They're so approachable you have to ask them if they will be offended if you ask a question.

HAHA

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 05:11 PM

They're so approachable you have to ask them if they will be offended if you ask a question.

HAHA:rolleyes::straightface:

Tamara Croft

08-30-2007, 05:12 PM

They're so approachable you have to ask them if they will be offended if you ask a question.

HAHADon't be so obnoxious :slap:

Julie York

08-30-2007, 05:15 PM

Don't be so obnoxious :slap:

Do you not see that someone who has no problem or objections or anything with the FtM has to ASK if they can post a ****ing question?

Hasn't any little alarm bell gone off with ANYONe yet?

brylram

08-30-2007, 05:17 PM

They're so approachable you have to ask them if they will be offended if you ask a question.

HAHA

How can you expect ANYONE to be approachable, when they're approached with the equivalent of a slap to the face? Try it some day... walk around asking people questions that will clearly offend them, or doing something else that will obviously be offensive, and see how many positive responses you get.

Jesus, use a little fu**ing common sense Julie, and get off your high horse.

Do you not see that someone who has no problem or objections or anything with the FtM has to ASK if they can post a ****ing question?

No-one has to ask permission, but if it's rude, people will say something. That's perfectly reasonable.

Tamara Croft

08-30-2007, 05:18 PM

Maybe Kriss asked because she's NEW?? thought of that?? why don't you ask HER instead... :rolleyes:

You have something against the FTM's Julie or what? cus I really get a sense you do....

Kris

08-30-2007, 05:25 PM

They're so approachable you have to ask them if they will be offended if you ask a question.

HAHA

Julie,

LMAO.. you are out to make me feel stupid these days, aren'tcha? LMAO

Kris

Julie York

08-30-2007, 05:31 PM

Maybe Kriss asked because she's NEW?? thought of that?? why don't you ask HER instead... :rolleyes:

You have something against the FTM's Julie or what? cus I really get a sense you do....

I really get the sense that you have lost touch with what is going on on this forum Tamara. You've been gadding about so much in the FtM pirate ship you can't see what's right in front of your nose. And naturally you can't see what's being said behind the scenes. You can't see what's being said on Yahoo.

I really get the sense that the FtM have no idea how much they have put public understanding backwards by all the bad feeling and bitching and seperation they are so determined to create.

When someone feels the NEED to ask...... to be so nervous of posting on the Transman forum that they have to ASK if they CAN...they feel so nervous that they NEED to ask if it is alright...then don't you think something has seriously ****ed up?

Or can't you see that?

Have another rum and carry on eh? You're having a good time with your buddies, that's all that counts. **** 'em.

I have absolutely nothing against any FtM other than their whining about how little they are understood, whilst making a determined effort to keep it that way.

Kris

08-30-2007, 05:31 PM

Do you not see that someone who has no problem or objections or anything with the FtM has to ASK if they can post a ****ing question?

Hasn't any little alarm bell gone off with ANYONe yet?

Whoahhhhhhhhhhh Julie,

I am not going to get into some cat fight with you. I will say that rather than ASSUME anything, I have respect enough to know that my questions might sound offending. I do not MEAN any offense, but depending on the person, they might believe that I am trying to be sarcastic or nasty by asking it. I want to lay the ground work WAY ahead of time that I do not mean to offend.. and my questions might seem...... DUMB (for lack of a better word) to someone who is living this life.

Now, judging from your posts of late, that I have had the opportunity to read, you are certainly NOT one of these people. You don't seem to give a darn about anyone but yourself......... so, gladly Ms Julie, I bow out of your world and will be completely comfortable in mine - where I will continue to be considerate of other peoples feelings and ask - or lay the ground work IF there is to be a misunderstanding.

Now, can you PLEASE find something better to do - and GET OFF MY BACK?

Kris

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 05:34 PM

I have respect enough to know that my questions might sound offending. I do not MEAN any offense, but depending on the person, they might believe that I am trying to be sarcastic or nasty by asking it. I want to lay the ground work WAY ahead of time that I do not mean to offend.. and my questions might seem...... DUMB (for lack of a better word) to someone who is living this life.
The only way i took it was you were being polite enough ask if we minded being quizzed a bit...:hugs:and i for one will answer anything if its done in a polite and respectful manner :D

Julie York

08-30-2007, 05:38 PM

Whoahhhhhhhhhhh Julie,

I am not going to get into some cat fight with you. I will say that rather than ASSUME anything, I have respect enough to know that my questions might sound offending. I do not MEAN any offense, but depending on the person, they might believe that I am trying to be sarcastic or nasty by asking it. I want to lay the ground work WAY ahead of time that I do not mean to offend.. and my questions might seem...... DUMB (for lack of a better word) to someone who is living this life.

Now, judging from your posts of late, that I have had the opportunity to read, you are certainly NOT one of these people. You don't seem to give a darn about anyone but yourself......... so, gladly Ms Julie, I bow out of your world and will be completely comfortable in mine - where I will continue to be considerate of other peoples feelings and ask - or lay the ground work IF there is to be a misunderstanding.

Now, can you PLEASE find something better to do - and GET OFF MY BACK?

Kris

None taken. Your mistaken assumptions about my character are based on a lack of knowledge because you are relatively new.

I don't believe I was every in the vicinty of your back so relax.

brylram

08-30-2007, 05:41 PM

None taken. Your mistaken assumptions about my character are based on a lack of knowledge because you are relatively new.

Her 'mistaken' assumptions are from watching how you interact with others. New or not, you show someone your bitch face enough, and they'll start to think it's the only one you have.

I really get the sense that you have lost touch with what is going on on this forum Tamara. You've been gadding about so much in the FtM pirate ship you can't see what's right in front of your nose. And naturally you can't see what's being said behind the scenes. You can't see what's being said on Yahoo.

I really get the sense that the FtM have no idea how much they have put public understanding backwards by all the bad feeling and bitching and seperation they are so determined to create.

When someone feels the NEED to ask...... to be so nervous of posting on the Transman forum that they have to ASK if they CAN...they feel so nervous that they NEED to ask if it is alright...then don't you think something has seriously ****ed up?

Or can't you see that?

Have another rum and carry on eh? You're having a good time with your buddies, that's all that counts. **** 'em.

I have absolutely nothing against any FtM other than their whining about how little they are understood, whilst making a determined effort to keep it that way.

Are you SO busy being indignant over the apparently 'horrible, unreasonable, and whiny' requests of people for respect... and the entirely reasonable negative responses to offensive posts... that you can't see that maybe we're "whining" for a reason? We're reacting to unpleasant behaviour from others (well-intentioned or not), and we're not gonna just say "oh, dear... Julie doesn't like the idea of showing others respect, let's just allow offensive behaviour to continue rather than addressing it." No matter how conceited you are that you can expect that.

I do believe you said in your posts.... you said packing...... ok laugh here... do you mean carrying a gun? If I don't laugh at me, my life would be miserable - so feel free to laugh at me.

lol, no... fortunately it doesn't mean carrying a gun. :p It means putting something in your pants to create the appearance of a male 'bulge'. It can be anything from rolled up socks, to condoms filled with hair gel, to expensive prosthetic penises.

Kris

08-30-2007, 05:45 PM

The only way i took it was you were being polite enough ask if we minded being quizzed a bit...:hugs:and i for one will answer anything if its done in a polite and respectful manner :D

Thank you so much......... I appreciate you understanding my point.. as SOMEONE WITH MANNERS WOULD.......... eh hem....

Anyway......

I do believe you said in your posts.... you said packing...... ok laugh here... do you mean carrying a gun? If I don't laugh at me, my life would be miserable - so feel free to laugh at me.

I am assuming that I have upset others besides Julie.. so if you don't mind Kieron .. I will PM you..

Thanks,
Kris

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 05:46 PM

Thank you so much......... I appreciate you understanding my point.. as SOMEONE WITH MANNERS WOULD.......... eh hem....

Anyway......

I do believe you said in your posts.... you said packing...... ok laugh here... do you mean carrying a gun? If I don't laugh at me, my life would be miserable - so feel free to laugh at me.

I am assuming that I have upset others besides Julie.. so if you don't mind Kieron .. I will PM you..

Thanks,
KrisStart another thread Kris away from this one :Dbut no not a gun its the male equivalent to the breast forms only ahem! down the pants...now go make a new thread to ask the rest :D

Julie York

08-30-2007, 05:47 PM

Her 'mistaken' assumptions are from watching how you interact with others. New or not, you show someone your bitch face enough, and they'll start to think it's the only one you have.

I agree. Show someone how whiny and petty someone can be about whether a post open with hey guys or hey ladies, ...they might start to think ALL FtM are like that.

Anyway this is fun but I have to work tomorrow.

Catch you later.

Tamara Croft

08-30-2007, 05:49 PM

I'm sorry, please just go passed this post, because it is directed at Julie, not anyone else and I'm sorry for the following outburst, but it is going to be said!!!!
I really get the sense that you have lost touch with what is going on on this forum Tamara. You've been gadding about so much in the FtM pirate ship you can't see what's right in front of your nose. And naturally you can't see what's being said behind the scenes. You can't see what's being said on Yahoo.LOL... really, get over yourself... I couldn't care less what is being said about me on yahoo or anyone else, as long as this forum is running well, then I'm doing my job and as the forum is overwhelmed with daily posts, then the only problem is you isn't it.
I really get the sense that the FtM have no idea how much they have put public understanding backwards by all the bad feeling and bitching and seperation they are so determined to create.What do you care? I mean really, when do you ever show any support to the guys, other than bitching and moaning about changes that literally don't affect you, because the only time you ever post is in the lounge or to piss someone off, which of late, is all you ever do isn't it?

When someone feels the NEED to ask...... to be so nervous of posting on the Transman forum that they have to ASK if they CAN...they feel so nervous that they NEED to ask if it is alright...then don't you think something has seriously ****ed up?Yeah, you're seriously ******* up... People are nervous when they are new, don't you remember being new? scared to ask something? no?? probably not, you always did have such a big mouth didn't you.
Or can't you see that?No, just can see you being you as per :censor: usual...

Have another rum and carry on eh? You're having a good time with your buddies, that's all that counts. **** 'em.What's the matter? are you jealous? seems so doesn't it... Maybe I hang around with the guys more, because they simply have a whole lot more respect for others... and yeah, I'm having a great time, pardon :censor: me!!!!
I have absolutely nothing against any FtM other than their whining about how little they are understood, whilst making a determined effort to keep it that way.Whining? wow, you're one to talk, whinging about this, whinging about that... segregation... jesus efffin christ.... get the :censor: over it... if you can't get over it, then that's your bloody problem isn't it!!!!

Now you can say what the hell you like to me, people can talk about me, I don't really give a shit.... but I'm sick of this shit on the forum, it's time people started to flaming grow the hell up!!!!!

Kris

08-30-2007, 05:53 PM

None taken. Your mistaken assumptions about my character are based on a lack of knowledge because you are relatively new.

I don't believe I was every in the vicinty of your back so relax.

None taken? Did you misconstrue my thoughts and opinions as a way to make sure that you are not offended? Please.. reread what I wrote. I SO do not mind if I offended you. As you don't seem to mind if you offend others, I actually am a bit miffed that you aren't offended, as I didn't get the desired result that I intended on getting.

LMAO at my mistaken assumptions. I have read posts here for about a month and I have yet to see one place where you have been considerate towards another human. I believe my assumptions are right on. This is who you have shown the entire time I have been here.

" I don't believe I was every in the vicinty of your back so relax"

What the heck does this mean? Every in the vicinity of my back? EVERY .. VICINTY?

People in glass houses need to be careful about throwing stones.

brylram

08-30-2007, 05:58 PM

I agree. Show someone how whiny and petty someone can be about whether a post open with hey guys or hey ladies, ...they might start to think ALL FtM are like that.

Oh yes, cause there's no problem at all when a certain sort of action causes some to feel discluded... so obviously we were whining for the hell of it... probably just to be annoying and throw your precious perfect forum out of whack, right?

And heaven forbid you might have to acknowledge that most of the changes made have been positive... in fact, rather than taking everyone away from each other, I think it's left everyone just as close together (everything is STILL all right next together for mtf's and ftm's)... but now people can SEE everything there is, right up front. So contrary to your whining about segregation, I think it's made it more obvious that there's a range of people here, and as a result will probably promote awareness and participation in the long run.

What you're whining about isn't segregation, it's visibility... you don't seem to be able to handle anything other than everyone shoved together in a big indistinguishable (and frankly not optimally organized) blob.

GypsyKaren

08-30-2007, 06:04 PM

This is not a "Let's Argue" thread, so take some of this to PM's, would you please?

Karen Starlene

mistunderstood

08-30-2007, 06:23 PM

Wow I leave and it blows up in here.

privateperks

08-30-2007, 06:37 PM

Karen, i understand that this isn't a free for all. But at the same time, this is *not* a private issue. We've been trying for the last few weeks really strenuously, and well before that - to keep this kind of insensitive posting out of this forum. This is a SERIOUS let down when it comes as it does on the cusp of an attemp on our part to try and be more included here at crossdressers and neither to isolate ourselves nor allow others to isolate us by their remarks.

It is really offensive. I somehow doubt it would be overlooked if I went into the girls section and told them how easy they must have it since they can raid their wife's drawers to get underwear and clothes instead of buying them and how easy it must be to hide a penis as opposed to breasts, and that at least they can take hormones if they want to grow some while no amount of chemical magic will help us out in the penis department . No, I suspect that if I said that kind of thing, I'd get kicked out of here - *and rightfully so.* Or to parody another common remark around here 'oh, you're such a good looking guy, why do you want to grow a pair of horrid boobies for?' Also really insulting, but something that's appearently to be tolerated when its flung at us - while standing up for ourselves draws remarks that we're somehow bullying the board, when all that we ask is people show us a little respect too, as we do by adressing people properly and not continually whining about how hard we have it compared to every other group of people on the planet and thereby trivializing their own problems.

Now, to top it off, we get someone who asks respectfully if she can ask us questions - everyone here is totally cool with that - only to get jumped on by the board harpy who has shown a distinct antagonism towards ftms - not to mention towards everyone else.

Are you saying that both these continually insulting posts, which - and let's face it - would not be tolerated from some random redneck peckerwood biggot randomly coming on here - and the continual antagonism of one specific poster - are going to be tolerated?

I get it if ya'll are into freedom of expression and letting everybody have their say and lets all try to understand that Julie occassionaly feels the need to act like a total cow, etc etc let's stand in a circle holding hands to get in touch with our inner whatever, but this kind of thing is going to drive ftm's off this board if it is tolerated. I am actually on the verge of going myself since it looks that we have very few supporters on the staff here and that as far as ftm's are concerned, it's open season here at cross dressers.

This is not an isolated case, and while on one side the problem is with a specific poster - that is *not* all that it is. I'm not pissed at you specifically btw, just at the general apathy shown in the ongoing toleration of this bull shit.

:mad: :mad:

Jaysus, where is the "bottle breaking ready for a bar fight" icon where you need one?

GypsyKaren

08-30-2007, 06:55 PM

Perks, I truly understand how you feel, and it's fine to argue a point in a constructive manner, but personal bickering will not be tolerated, I don't care what forum it's in. We have a PM system, use it.

One other thing, ordinarily I would have deleted some of the posts here, but I give you guys a greater latitude because to me you've earned it (I'm not saying that's the problem here, it's others), that's why I politely asked for peace

Karen Starlene

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 07:27 PM

I hope the guys here realise some of us want to understand more.
We sure do Lizzie, there are some girls here that have really taken the time to get to know us, and we welcome those with open arms, the ones that dont or are ignorant is definitely in the minority

brylram

08-30-2007, 07:28 PM

May I add my bit?

The very first post demonstrated ignorance (not in a perjoritive way) and actually was "useful" in that it demonstrated what many do ..
Stereotype / assume as a result of not taking the trouble form an opinion from informed facts / observations.

It needed challenging. Of course, if I was repeatedly misrepresented I would give an emotional response because I would be fed up from the repeat nature of avoidable ignorance.

I have learnt a lot from this thread - I never realised how much cr+p my transmasculine brothers had to endure. Thank you for enlightening me and from your responses I can feel how much you are hurt by such things.
And as a "newbie" here, it was "enlightening" to see how someone can divert a thread by making personal attacks rather than debating the issue.

I hope this doesn't sound patronising as I dont mean it to be ... but I will be more aware of transmasculine issues as a result of coming here and I hope to make some contacts and share all types of exchanges.

To finish, I so understand the emotional charge resulting from the feeling of being (yet again) attacked/insulted/misrepresented. I hope the guys here realise some of us want to understand more.

Lizzie.

PS
and .. Kris ... I have noticed how repectful and careful you are in your posts. It is a quality some of us could do well to imitate. L

THIS is exactly the kind of response we've been hoping for all along... just a "hey, I can see things are a little less than ok, and/or I want to pay more attention to what's going on with you guys". I appreciate this a huge amount Lizzie, I really do. :hugs: I realize very much that there are a good lot of you who would like to understand... unfortunately it's the one's who are being negative and rude that are the most vocal. I hope that our responses to those who are offending us are not being taken as general ill-will towards mtf's, we love those of you that are kind to us and give us a little understanding, we just can't tolerate those who do the opposite.

And Kris, you too have been a great relief to have in this thread. So I'd like to thank you as well... and to extend thanks to every member, no matter their label, who has supported us. :hugs: To you all.

mistunderstood

08-30-2007, 07:31 PM

I would like to ask respectfully if we can just lock this thread. I feel like all it will do is keep the fight going. Thank you all the girls who are tring to see what we see every day. Thank you Kriss GG for being respectfull and asking questions.
I do not like being steped on but I am also tired of fighting.

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 07:32 PM

and to extend thanks to every member, no matter their label, who has supported us. :hugs: To you all.hear hear! i second that

Marcie Sexton

08-30-2007, 07:32 PM

Nature of the beast my dear...we just aren't meant to look all girlie girl with out some major help...

...but with that said you don't live in this area...even the gay/lesbian community have a hard time being accepted...can you think what we m2f and f2m deal with here...perhaps that is the reason I have yet to meet any one of either gender that my wife and I can socially meet...

Kris

08-30-2007, 07:35 PM

Lizzie.

PS
and .. Kris ... I have noticed how repectful and careful you are in your posts. It is a quality some of us could do well to imitate. L

Lizzie + Et al ~

I sincerely apologize for letting my reactions get the better of me on this and ANY post that I get involved in. I feel absolutely like a heal for making the mistake of being pulled into a temper tantrum that brought me down low enough to respond with emotion rather than wisdom.

I am glad that you notice how respectful that I try to be. I do not and will not ever try to offend anyone - and am ashamed of the fact that I was brought to that today. Please forgive me. I did not mean to "hy-jack" this thread.. however it seems that I managed to accomplish that unintentionally.

Please accept my deepest apologies .. everyone. I was disrespectful of your site, and your time of reading.

Kris

CaptLex

08-30-2007, 07:40 PM

I feel absolutely like a heal for making the mistake of being pulled into a temper tantrum that brought me down low enough to respond with emotion rather than wisdom.
You have nothing to apologize for, Kris. And throwing a temper tantrum is something that happens to all of us sooner or later here, so I'd say that means you're not a newbie anymore. :hugs:

brylram

08-30-2007, 07:41 PM

Please accept my deepest apologies .. everyone. I was disrespectful of your site, and your time of reading.

I don't feel you were disrespectful at all... except to Julie... but she seems to go around looking specifically for that. So no worries on my end, I think you were great, and even if emotion was behind your responses, they seemed reasonable to me and I didn't get the impression you were being impulsive at all.

Kris

08-30-2007, 07:44 PM

I don't feel you were disrespectful at all... except to Julie... but she seems to go around looking specifically for that. So no worries on my end, I think you were great, and even if emotion was behind your responses, they seemed reasonable to me and I didn't get the impression you were being impulsive at all.

Awe man, you're gonna make me cry... I was disrespectful of your space to throw my tantrum. I WAS wrong. I have higher expectations of myself and I wish those around me hold me to those higher expectations as well.

Now enough with this... lets all just be friends ... I am not above having a huge slumber party.. wanna come?

Kris :tongueout

Amy

08-30-2007, 07:44 PM

I should probably just let this thread die and not add anything to a smuldering fire but I did have some thing to say. I've enjoyed the time I've spent on the guys side of the fence. I had a question a little while ago and yes, I did ask permission before I posted. Not because I feared the guys would be offended by being asked a question but out of respect. You don't just barge into someones house or dare I say get on a ship before asking, "permission to come aboad." I rember back hen there weren't half the number of f2ms that are heree now and every tiime they tried to post some thing there threads would become inandated with m2f comments about panties and what have you. I feel when I post in this forum I post as a guest and should respect that.
My question was answered specifically and respectfully and I learned a lot about the f2m on this forum. Thank you Gentlemen for your kind responces.

JamesAlan

08-30-2007, 07:48 PM

Tempers can run high when you are barraded with misunderstandings and sometimes with direct insults. I had to leave the thread and come back when I cooled off to make a response. My girlfriend and I have had discussions on what each of us will have to go through. Neither of us have it easy and understand that. Being able to pass when you have feminine features is hard, you get read as a butch lesbian instead of a guy. One of the struggles of what we go through. But no one that travels this path will have it completely easy (unless you are a complete recluse and inherited a fortune lol). Glad to see the thread calmed down a bit while I was calming down. Hugs to the girls that want to understand. I'm new to discovering my own transexuality. I haven't seen what the guys have gone through before I came along. I just got a little taste of it.

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 07:51 PM

I am not above having a huge slumber party.. wanna come?
YAY! a slumber party!!! woohooo! *Kieron goes to hunt for his best clean PJs and sleeping bag* :D

Thank you Gentlemen for your kind responces.YVW! anytime Amy :)

Tamara Croft

08-30-2007, 07:53 PM

YAY! a slumber party!!! woohooo! *Kieron goes to hunt for his best clean PJs and sleeping bag* :D
You're such a goof.... your words :devil:

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 07:54 PM

You're such a goof.... your words :devil:but such a wuvable one *your words:tongueout*

Tamara Croft

08-30-2007, 07:55 PM

but such a wuvable one *your words:tongueout*Gawd... the cheek... :slap: (my hand) :p

GypsyKaren

08-30-2007, 07:57 PM

Oh geez, I think I preferred the fighting...

Karen Starlene

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 07:58 PM

Oh geez, I think I preferred the fighting...

Karen Starleneahhh come here you know you wanna join in :hugs:

Tamara Croft

08-30-2007, 07:58 PM

Oh geez, I think I preferred the fighting...

Karen StarleneDon't make me come up there and slap you melady... :slap:

Kris

08-30-2007, 08:23 PM

I was gonna say.....

Just like a woman.. can't ever make them happy...
always complainin about summpin.

:tongueout

Kris

JamesAlan

08-30-2007, 08:27 PM

Oh boy, slumber party!!! :Party: *grabs clean pj's, flashlight, sleeping bag, munchies, drinks, and scary stories books* I'm ready :D:thumbup:

privateperks

08-30-2007, 08:29 PM

I've got the ferret!

(Well, you've gotta have a ferret at slumber parties don't you know )

:D

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 08:29 PM

*grabs clean pj'syou know when theres girls involved we all grab clean PJs lol

JamesAlan

08-30-2007, 08:31 PM

Most of my pj's are clean, they are barely slept in :heehee:

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 08:31 PM

I've got the ferret!

(Well, you've gotta have a ferret at slumber parties don't you know )

:Dok please explain this to me....

CaptLex

08-30-2007, 08:34 PM

I just realized . . . Missy is going to come back and wonder what the heck happened to her thread. :eek: Just another crazy day at CD.com . . . we'll blame it on the full moon and lunar eclipse. :heehee:

privateperks

08-30-2007, 08:34 PM

Ferrets (getting on the I love my furry slinky more than anything on the face of this planet soapbox) make excellent company in any activity involving sleep or even just laying down as they typically snooze around 16 hours a day, more when older. They are the perfect size and shape to curl up on stomachs providing company, warmth, and something fuzzy to pet - and when in deepest state of sleep can be passed around like a party favor without even waking up.

StephanieT

08-30-2007, 08:44 PM

I would never assume that anyone has it easy in this world of discrimination. It seems like if you don't fit the perfect mold that society has created, a person will face ridicule from others. You are too fat, too thin, too short, too tall, don't have the right job, not enough education, etc, etc. I get really tired of others judging me for what I am not. I am a good person and try to treat others with respect and I expect the same from others.

Several years ago, I had a severe physical injury. I was not allowed to bear any weight on one of my legs for 6 weeks. Because of this injury i got a handicap parking permit and an electric cart for transportation around work so I would not have to walk on crutches. I was amazed at how cruel people could be. One guy asked me why I had the cart and why did I not get up and walk with crutches and be a MAN. That made me realize that until you have walked in another persons shoes, you should not judge what they are going through.

Kieron Andrew

08-30-2007, 08:46 PM

until you have walked in another persons shoes, you should not judge what they are going through.
never a truer word spoken :)

Kris

08-30-2007, 08:48 PM

That made me realize that until you have walked in another persons shoes, you should not judge what they are going through.

StephanieT,

Can you please not bring this up at the slumber party?

And if they are guys are coming (obviously I invited them) who is REALLY gonna wear PJ's anyway?

I'm naughty!

Kris :devil:

JamesAlan

08-30-2007, 08:48 PM

Personally, I would have tried to run over his toes for that comment. But yeah, I've been discriminated again my entire life for being "fluffy." I try not to judge others because I know how much it hurts to have it happen to me.

JamesAlan

08-30-2007, 08:51 PM

You naughty girl Kris. But I like that. Now just gotta drag my sweet kitty to the slumber party, need to find some catnip to lure her with lol.

Dee Talbot

08-30-2007, 09:43 PM

Ok to me or just the why my mind works, but it seams to me that f2m cd's have it a whole lot easier being out and at passing then m2f cd's do.

Missy
Sure they have it easy!!! I mean clearly, read a few posts in the Transmen forum and you will see what a breeze it is for these gentlemen :rolleyes:

Or, you could ask Brandon Teena how easy it is!!!! Yeah!!!! Oh, wait....that's right...he's dead because of intolerance.

Sorry to be bitchy. It must be a woman thing :straightface:

Dee

Edit**** Well Crap!!! There I was posting "on-topic" and being a good gg, without reading the whole thread. Come to find out, you are all having a slumber party and I crashed it LOL!!!!!

Kris

08-30-2007, 10:01 PM

It's okay Dee...

A few :drink::drink: and we will getcha all loosened up.

Kris

JamesAlan

08-30-2007, 10:53 PM

As someone tells a scary story, I hide in my sleeping back and inch over like a giant worm to scare someone. he he he That'll liven things up.

DanielMacBride

08-30-2007, 11:12 PM

Geez, looks like I missed all the fun....Kris, ignore Julie, she's a veteran s**t stirrer (yeah I found that out pretty fast even though I'm relatively new too). As Kieron said if you are interested in any aspect of ftm stuff, feel free to venture over our side of the fence and ask, you have done nothing to offend us and we are happy to field questions from people who are genuinely interested :)

And thanks for actually asking btw, its nice to see that some people can do that and have their assumptions challenged without getting on their high horse ;) :hugs:

Daniel

GypsyKaren

08-30-2007, 11:31 PM

Ferrets? Slumber parties? Now I really should close this thread...

Karen Starlene

Kris

08-31-2007, 12:24 AM

Ferrets? Slumber parties? Now I really should close this thread...

Karen Starlene

You're just jealous because you haven't been invited yet.. and with an attitude like that.. you'll be outside with Donkey ( From Shrek)

LMAO..

Just kiddin

Kris :tongueout

Daintre

08-31-2007, 01:21 AM

May I please add this....Yes Julie can be a pain in the a**, but I also know that she can be a voice of reason at times. I post here very seldome..why?..well I do not like to intrude, but, if I feel that if I am passionate over a thread, I will post

*I posted this because I felt strongly about this thread....what I find discouraging is the fact that the thread was subverted.

ZenFrost

08-31-2007, 03:40 AM

Well, I've been away at school and have therefore missed this whole thread. Though, I would certainly have preferred to spend my time on this thread than sit through some very boring classes. :dry: I'll start with the original post:

Ok to me or just the why my mind works, but it seams to me that f2m cd's have it a whole lot easier being out and at passing then m2f cd's do.

Missy

Yes Missy, it's just you. You and many other misinformed people who don't try to see things from our view. It's true that girls can wear pants while guys can't wear skirts, but the second that gender identity comes into play it becomes a whole other ballpark. And I don't see how we have an easier time passing... we're short, our hands are small, our voices are high, we have wide hips, and lumps of flesh are attached to our chests that are really hard to hide. How is that 'easy?'

As for the rest of this thread, I want to commend Perks and Logan for 'saying it like it is.' I also want to thank Kris for being so cool. And Tamera... words can't describe how much I love you right now. :wuv:

I hope you ladies and gents don't mind me passing on the slumber party, it really just isn't my thing.

P.S...

May I please add this....Yes Julie can be a pain in the a**, but I also know that she can be a voice of reason at times. I post here very seldome..why?..well I do not like to intrude, but, if I feel that if I am passionate over a thread, I will post

*I posted this because I felt strongly about this thread....what I find discouraging is the fact that the thread was subverted.

I don't mean to be rude but I think there's a big difference between being a pain in the arse and being malicious. And she's shown us nothing but spite every time we try to speak up about being treated hurtfully by other members on this forum.

Kris

08-31-2007, 04:28 AM

' I also want to thank Kris for being so cool. And Tamera... words can't describe how much I love you right now. :wuv:

I hope you ladies and gents don't mind me passing on the slumber party, it really just isn't my thing.

:tongueout

Well aren't you just a party pooper! Anything that could change your mind? :cheers: I am sure that we could think of SOMETHING to do at the party that you would like to participate in once you have had a few :drink: maybe??

:hugs: Kris

Kieron Andrew

08-31-2007, 05:07 AM

:tongueout

Well aren't you just a party pooper! Anything that could change your mind? :cheers: I am sure that we could think of SOMETHING to do at the party that you would like to participate in once you have had a few :drink: maybe??

:hugs: Kris
wave some rum under his nose

DanielMacBride

08-31-2007, 05:34 AM

LOL yep that'd work ;)

Daniel

brylram

08-31-2007, 07:47 AM

Toyah

08-31-2007, 07:51 AM

Ferrets? Slumber parties? Now I really should close this thread...

Karen Starlene

Ask Tamara about nipple clamps and jump leads !!!!!!:D

Kieron Andrew

08-31-2007, 08:06 AM

I gotta say... I actually really don't like the direction this thread has been taken.... I put a lot of work into trying to address an issue, and I feel kinda hurt that it's been made into a slumber party.

There are already party threads, and it'd be easy enough to start a new one... but please, leave serious threads alone. I feel all that came previously in this thread is being belittled.ok i know i helped take it off topic, and for that i apologise, i was just sick of the B/S, but i must say i have to agree, this may as well be closed now

privateperks

08-31-2007, 08:56 AM

Fair enough, just thought it would be good to lighten the mood a bit. My apologies.

brylram

08-31-2007, 08:59 AM

That's alright guys... I WOULD like to keep it open so that future readers could submit their own comments/thoughts... but I'm not sure if they might just stop at the part stuff and not go any further, so I'm not sure how effective it would be at achieving that goal.

Kieron Andrew

08-31-2007, 09:05 AM

brylram

08-31-2007, 09:08 AM

lol, Lex to the rescue eh? Well, he did do a fantastic job on changing my t-log's thread name... so I trust him with the job. :p

Kris

08-31-2007, 09:32 AM

I gotta say... I actually really don't like the direction this thread has been taken.... I put a lot of work into trying to address an issue, and I feel kinda hurt that it's been made into a slumber party.

There are already party threads, and it'd be easy enough to start a new one... but please, leave serious threads alone. I feel all that came previously in this thread is being belittled.

Brylram,

I am sorry. Please accept my apology. I was trying to lighten the thread. It IS an important issue, I couldn't agree more. I simply wanted things to go in a lighter mood, and everyone to stop fighting. I will try to remember not to do this again in the future...

:hugs: Kris

brylram

08-31-2007, 09:37 AM

That's ok Kris... I totally understand the feeling of wanting a lighter mood. Sometimes moods are better left heavy though.

Hopefully over time the fighting will get to be less, but for now I think we're just at a point where it needs to happen for a while... I havent been here long, but I get the impression things were building up for a while before I joined, and everything just kinda got to be too much or something. That's the problem with not talking as we all go along... once conversation starts, too much needs to be said, and it's all built up too much importance.

I may not have been here for the build-up, but damned if I'm not good at picking up on what's going on and then joining in. lol :p

*note* By the way... to all non-ftm members who'd rather use my first name than my username, it's Logan. Just 'cause I know some people like it better that way. (I know, I know, Kieron "just put it in my signature"... I still say non!)

Kieron Andrew

08-31-2007, 09:41 AM

lol, Lex to the rescue eh? Well, he did do a fantastic job on changing my t-log's thread name... so I trust him with the job. :pi just like getting him to work *ok im dead*....*finds a girls skirt to hide under*

Kieron Andrew

08-31-2007, 09:42 AM

*note* By the way... to all non-ftm members who'd rather use my first name than my username, it's Logan. Just 'cause I know some people like it better that way. (I know, I know, Kieron "just put it in my signature"... I still say non!)well put it under your avatar then, instead of signature :tongueout

Taylor105

08-31-2007, 09:46 AM

brylram

08-31-2007, 09:49 AM

well put it under your avatar then, instead of signature

*gasp* and give up my precious "member" title?! rofl... a'right, a'right already... I'll do it.

LOL at This false idea and misconception goes around this place more often than a rabid, runaway panty thread. hehehe

The man has a way with words... undeniably. :D

Robin Leigh

08-31-2007, 11:46 AM

Kris

08-31-2007, 12:03 PM

Sorry, I haven't read the whole thread. I don't want to get angry or depressed.

But I'm continually amazed when MTFs suggest that it's somehow easier for FTM. We all get treated as gender traitors and objects of ridicule. And if anyone says that MTFs are in risk of danger when en femme, please remember that none of us are exempt from such violence.

It's hard enough for GMs to be accepted as men (as anyone who's been the brunt of homophobic comments should well realize). But that's nothing compared to what it must be like for an FTM.

Sure, some GGs may give a MTF a sour or patronizing look. So what? GMs can be far more patronizing & callous.

:hugs:

Robin

What worries me is how GM in society can be horribly cruel. I have heard many stories of men (F2M) being gang raped and/or beat to a bloody pulp and as Dee suggested, killed.

A lady (M2F) often still has his size and strength to use to protect himself from others and I don't MEAN that she can take on a gang and that violence doesn't happen... but not as often as I hear about it happening to GF...

That alone makes a difference in my book....... but I think everyone has prejudices to deal with in their own life.. but there is no misery meter that says who's got it worse.

Kris

CaptLex

08-31-2007, 03:30 PM

The man has a way with words... undeniably. :D

:bow:

John

09-01-2007, 10:14 AM

Wow, didn't I miss the fun! :rolleyes:

Christ, can't leave you lot alone for five minuits, can I? :heehee:

Brylram,

I am sorry. Please accept my apology. I was trying to lighten the thread. It IS an important issue, I couldn't agree more. I simply wanted things to go in a lighter mood, and everyone to stop fighting. I will try to remember not to do this again in the future...

:hugs: Kris

Ah, how could you have know that putting 'party' anywere on the ship instantly melts the thread down into just that? :heehee: I agree that it was getting intence though. Oh, and welcome on bord, wench :D

CaptLex

09-01-2007, 02:35 PM

Ah, how could you have know that putting 'party' anywere on the ship instantly melts the thread down into just that? :heehee: I agree that it was getting intence though. Oh, and welcome on bord, wench :D
Haha, Jhonny, you're so right. That's why I thought the party part of the thread should stay - it says it all about us, really. We're not just about arguing our point - we're also appreciative of fun and supportive people that get us and share the good and bad parts of our lives. And even if we usually take a thread off course, we get it back on and continue it.

Only problem I have is that it was a pajama party - c'mon, what self-respecting pirate wears pajamas? :raspp: