Mother knows?

[angelfire]

Alright, so as most people here say, Mothers always know. Well, I think mine may have figured it out.

I am out to 1 of my friends, who is also a partner on a project we are working on. So today he had to come over to my house to work on it, because I have the programs we need, and he does not. I still live at home.

So my parents decide to be generous, and order chinese for us. Its labour day weekend, so they ask how everyone's weekend was. I say "Meh, kinda boring. Could been better.", and my friend says "Well, I'm here, so it should be amazing." and I say, jokingly "I've had better."

Now this part kinda took me off guard. My mother says "Would it have been a better weekend if he wore a skirt & heels?" and I just kinda say nothing and continue eating, everyone else kinda laughing, but with an awkward look on their face.

So I have to step outside for a minute after dinner to take care of something, and my friend follows me out, and says "Was the skirt & heels comment a jab at me, or at you?" And I just kinda say "I have no idea." and walk back inside. When I get back in, he goes to the bathroom, and while I'm in the kitchen, my mom winks at me. I say "What?" and she just winks again. So I say "Ooookay. Thanks for dinner", and proceed to continue working on the project.

So I am thinking she knows, and feel a little awkward. I have been considering telling her for a little while, but haven't thought of how to go about doing it.

So, do you think she knows, or am I just reading too deeply into this comment & gesture?

[Kris]

Okay, I gotta say that is just WEIRD!

I am a mom and I think my 21 year old son is a cross dresser but NEVER would I consider joking or outting him in front of his friends. NEVER......

I would think that with a wink.... maybe she thinks you are gay? I am assuming that you friend is a male as well??

I mean even if you were a cross dresser, that doesn't insinuate that you would wear a skirt and heels for another guy, ya know?

I would surely ask my mom what she meant by that BEFORE considering telling her .. but then again, you know your relationship with your mom better..... and you are a better judge of what her intentions were.

I could be TOTALLY off base.

Kris

[Jackie67]

Mommy always new from the getgo. I am a twin and when we came home I was dressed just like my sister.:happy:

[Jodi]

Alright, so as most people here say, Mothers always know. Well, I think mine may have figured it out.

I am out to 1 of my friends, who is also a partner on a project we are working on. So today he had to come over to my house to work on it, because I have the programs we need, and he does not. I still live at home.

So my parents decide to be generous, and order chinese for us. Its labour day weekend, so they ask how everyone's weekend was. I say "Meh, kinda boring. Could been better.", and my friend says "Well, I'm here, so it should be amazing." and I say, jokingly "I've had better."

Now this part kinda took me off guard. My mother says "Would it have been a better weekend if he wore a skirt & heels?" and I just kinda say nothing and continue eating, everyone else kinda laughing, but with an awkward look on their face.

So I have to step outside for a minute after dinner to take care of something, and my friend follows me out, and says "Was the skirt & heels comment a jab at me, or at you?" And I just kinda say "I have no idea." and walk back inside. When I get back in, he goes to the bathroom, and while I'm in the kitchen, my mom winks at me. I say "What?" and she just winks again. So I say "Ooookay. Thanks for dinner", and proceed to continue working on the project.

So I am thinking she knows, and feel a little awkward. I have been considering telling her for a little while, but haven't thought of how to go about doing it.

So, do you think she knows, or am I just reading too deeply into this comment & gesture?

You "think" she knows. Come on. How dense are you? Of course she must know. It is high time that the two of you talk to preclude any misconceptions by her.

Jodi

[Carin]

Well, she definately thinks she knows something, and whatever that is, she is ok with it. So now all that is left is to make sure that she knows the right thing. Cause she is going down a path, and it is better for you and her and the both of you if she goes down the right path.

[racquel]

My :2c:,I think Mom suspects your are gay and suggesting the friend wear "feminine" clothing was her way of saying she is o.k. with it; because many people consider cross-dresser's to be gay she was telling you she loves you and supports you.Again this is my :2c:

[dakota_ann69]

Okay, I gotta say that is just WEIRD!

I would think that with a wink.... maybe she thinks you are gay? I am assuming that you friend is a male as well??

Kris

I tend to agree with this but the bottom line is that you and mom need to clear the air.

My mom always knew about me although we have never openly discussed the issue of being a crossdresser. Maybe it was the panties in the drawer that tipped me off while still living at home. :heehee:

[Veronica 1]

I agree. you have to have a talk with Mom and set her straight. Let her know where you are coming from and set her mind to rest about any thoughts of being gay. Which could bring up a whole new set of problems as she could be OK with you being gay, but as a crossdresser you could be entering a realm that she has not considered and may not be understanding of. Go slow and choose your words carefully.

[angelfire]

I never really considered that she may think I was gay, because I have made it clear to her in the past that I am attracted to women. I have had girlfriends as well, so I don't know if she still seems to think I'm gay, or if she just knows I'm a crossdresser. Who knows, maybe she found my stash or something, but didn't say it.

The main reason I haven't told her yet is because I agree that I need to choose my words carefully. It is definitely something I need to think about before, and what needs saying, but more importantly, how to say it.

I know she will accept me regardless, I just need to think about how to tell her, which seems to be taking me a while. I was considering just leaving her a note, but wouldn't want anyone else to get curious and read it. Any advice on how I should come out to her then, would be my next question.

[Mary Morgan]

Take her to lunch and have a girl to girl chat. I think you will be very pleasantly surprised. I think she needs and wants clarification, and yes, she will be supportive.

[MJ]

You "think" she knows. ??? , she Knows it time for the truth , take her to lunch and spill it . the fact that she winks at you and is not freaking about it would suggest she's somewhat understands so take mum out have a chat set her strait

[Margot]

Take another tack. Just ask her why she made the comment and ask her if she thinks you or your friend are gay. This should open her up for comment.
:hugs:
Margot

[Corinna E]

when my mom found out it's cuz she came into my room early in the morning to wake me up and found i fell asleep in total femme mode. so she was more confused than anything. she was definately loving and supporting but it was hard for her to separate gay from trasngendered. make sure you think it through and choose your words wisely, your gonna get nervous, very nervous, so maybe run through with your friend a few times to get your words straight before going into it, that way you wont freeze up!

hope i was helpful and best of luck hun!!

<3 always, cori

[DonnaT]

Ask her, "How did you find out?"

You may need to remind her of the comments and winks.

Then let her tell you what she knows, and how she came to know.

If it's a 'gay' thing, you can set the record straight. If it's a 'CD' thing, then she knows and now you can open up to her.

In either case, she seems to accept what ever it may be.