Did something stupid

[Andrea_cd]

Well after months of toning down andrea i went and splurged on a impulse , brought myself some lovely breast forms and two gorgoeus bras , $200 later and i used the family credit card instead of getting cash out thru the bank , my wife is going to do the end of month statement and im going to be dead meat , really scared right now , my wife and i have had a rough patch lately and it was just getting good , buying the forms was great but stupid , now i'm waiting for the hammer to fall , looks like the conversation i never wanted to have with my wife is about to happen.

Wish me well , even tho i did the dumb thing in the first place

[dakota_ann69]

My advice to you is just to be honest and open with her. Best of luck!! Let us know how it turns out!! Can't really give too much advice as my wife has known since we got married and is tolerant, but doesn't want me dressing in front of her or the kids. Which is great for me!!

[Emily Ann Brown]

OOPSIES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Somebody in another thread asked what is the pink fog......this is a good definition.

For what my opinion is worth if I were you I would have the discussion before the bill arrives. There is an amount of anger that will come from the shock caused by the bill that you don't need as a part of a "honey, I am a crossdresser !" discussion.


Emily Ann

[Alice B]

You are in a pickle. Be open and honest with her because it is too late to be anything else. Good Luck!:hugs:

[Melinda G]

Run! Run like the wind!:2c:

[Rosaliy Lynne]

OOPSIES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Somebody in another thread asked what is the pink fog......this is a good definition.

For what my opinion is worth if I were you I would have the discussion before the bill arrives. There is an amount of anger that will come from the shock caused by the bill that you don't need as a part of a "honey, I am a crossdresser !" discussion.


Emily Ann


You are in a pickle. Be open and honest with her because it is too late to be anything else. Good Luck!:hugs:

as well as good advice. were I you I would follow it. and good luck ducky - you might need it.

[JoAnnDallas]

If you bought them online, check the site. Many times they will say that your credit card will be bill using a non-discript name. Like "ABC Enterprise".

[MJ]

[QUOTE]OOPSIES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Somebody in another thread asked what is the pink fog......this is a good definition.
so true emily

and yes i got my hormones on line doing the same thing 3 years ago ... don't Evan ask you don't want to know

i hope it turns out OK for you

[Dita_B]

If you bought them online, check the site. Many times they will say that your credit card will be bill using a non-discript name. Like "ABC Enterprise".

Depending on what the general consensus is in the situation between you and your wife you may still get lucky if you want to avoid the confrontation by putting another label to your purchases. Indeed the statement may show "ABC Enterprises" as many of those outlets are used to exercising discretion. If that is the case, you may be able to crawl through the eye of the needle as long as you find another explanation for your purchase. Like buying a tool or so... or even better, buy her a present of $200 and make it arrive in time...

Wish you luck and I am afraid you gonna need it...

:love:Dita

[CDBarbie]

If, as it appears, she doesn't know, then you must talk to her. Don't wait, it will only make things worse. If you are not willing to be open and honest with her it can only lead to disaster later.
The pink fog is a good discription, but, I wonder if there isn't an underlying part of you that want's her to know, subconciously. Maby this is your sub-concious working for you. Sometimes, sharing your secret seems impossible, but if she "finds out" than it is easier for you..
If the cat is truly out of the bag, please talk with her, be honest and open.
Good Luch.

[Deborah Jane]

Depending on what the general consensus is in the situation between you and your wife you may still get lucky if you want to avoid the confrontation by putting another label to your purchases. Indeed the statement may show "ABC Enterprises" as many of those outlets are used to exercising discretion. If that is the case, you may be able to crawl through the eye of the needle as long as you find another explanation for your purchase. Like buying a tool or so... or even better, buy her a present of $200 and make it arrive in time...

Wish you luck and I am afraid you gonna need it...

:love:Dita

I agree with Dita, buy a tool or something [using cash], then when she asks about it, just show her what you bought!

[Stephanie Blue]

Andrea, what a drag (no pun intended) I feel terrible for you. Two reasons, one that you have to hide who you are and two you are headed for one sh-t storm. On the bright side once it's over no matter the outcome it will be a huge weight off your shoulders. But I agree with the general view here and I think you should tell her before the bill arrives. So sorry sis, best of luck,Steph

[crunchysoda]

My vote? Be honest before the bill comes and I too think it's your subconcious trying to get you to tell her the *truth*.

[AllieSF]

I learned the hard way a long time ago. So now when I screw up, I try to reveal it to who needs to know as soon as possible. It hurts at that moment and maybe some while longer. However, my peace of mind after the revelation is great and I avoid all those awful anxiety trips that makes everything look more than half empty. Come clean and over the long run you will live a much healthier life and maybe even improve your relationship at the same time. Good luck.

[Sandygal]

I will be waiting for your new thread at the end of the month. "Got caught today"

[Shelly Preston]

If your sure you are going to be caught

Use the statment as a positive step tell her how you could have paid cash but would have avoided having to tell her

It was your way of forcing yourself to be truthful

You will find may other thread on the best way to tell your wife

I suggest you read as many of those as you can and get yourself prepared

[angelfire]

Well, either cover up what you bought with the 200$, because like others said, they usually use generic names. Or, you could have the discussion with her, and if so I strongly advise BEFORE the bill comes in.

[Wickanne GG]

You might find some reason in post #20 of this thread,

http://crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=65688

It is very well worded. There are some other posts that may be of interest to you in that thread.

:love:
Wickanne

[GACountrygal]

be honest with her....now's the time for it. No need to lie and dig a hole of shame and guilt.

[janet1234]

Good luck, keep us posted.

[Veronica 1]

Another good reason to not have a credit card for general use. Good luck.

[Karren H]

Stupid is as stupid does.. Lol. Firstly.. $200!! They have like gold nipples or something!! Lol. And if you hadn't spent that much you might have been able to pass it off as an oil change and a lube job.. But you'll be getting the lube job instead.. Sorry.. You'll know better next time I guess..
Good luck with that one..

Karren

[SherriePall]

That's why I take care of the bills.

[Andrea_cd]

Thankyou girls for the kind words and advice , i didn't use the credit card to buy them i used it to draw the $200 out , which shows up on the statement as a cash withdraw , and yes part of me would love to tell her everything , i hate hiding things from her i love her very much but i don't think that she would take this in a good light and her family has some pretty powerful lawyers as friends which scare the doo doo's out of me if she wanted to leave me i would be a dead duck.I'm going to try and do the end of month statement myself , i know i should tell her everything but the thought of losing her and my beautiful children terrifies me beyond beleif , if it turns out shee is going to see it anyway then i will have to bite the bullet and come clean and pray that she loves me as much as i love her and we will be strong enough to work thru this , even if it means Andrea takes a vacation for a few years , decades whatever it takes.

LOL Karen no they aren't golden nipples , i forgot to say that i brought a high waisted body breif as well , Nancy Ganz does wonderful shapewear.so the 2 bras $40 each the breastforms were $60 and the body brief was $55, all things i was planning to buy over a long period , i was alone the shops were there , so i brought , damn the Pink Fog

[Mitzi]

There are a couple of things you can do to avoid the "TALK", but only if your wife doesn't keep track of statements, just looks them over when they arrive.

Go to the credit card website and request an address change, like to your workplace. This will be done immediately. Then change it back after you've received the statement.

The other is to request the statement be changed to online. The trouble with this is it may take a billing cycle to take effect.

Of course, if your wife tracks things on the computer...

Mitzi

[Andrea_cd]

Well i sounded out my wife very gently to see what kind of response i might get.....not pretty , really not pretty , i asked what she would think if i shaved my legs , it went downhill rapidly from there , weird looks and silence , im in big trouble and i would give anything to take back what i did the other day , but i can't and now im going to have to pay for it

[Desiree2bababe]

You might be best to get the statement and pay it before she sees it. I know that was a major conflict in our marraige. Wasn't so much the dressing as it was the constant need for new things.

[melissaK]

I'm all for honesty, BUT, timing is everything. And the reality is many of us live in a carefully negoitated truce with our SO - a detente so carefully arranged that it makes us qualified to work at the UN.

Any chance the breast forms place will bill under a brown wrapper name and you can claim its golf clubs or auto body tools?

If not, Honey, I'd get to know my mailcarrier ASAP. $20/ Starbucks gift card to your route delivery person to have them hold the statement for pick-up at the Post Office is doable. (Gifts larger than that they can't accept). Or, can you call the CC company, find out the date the statement will mail, then be sure to be the one picking up the mail for that week? Or, go to PO and put a three day vacation hold on your mail when the statement should arrive. Pay this bill yourself.

Maybe you could send your wife for a three day spa getaway the weekend the bill comes in?

Well, people are most resourceful when cornered. You'll solve it - one way or another.

Hugs,
'lissa

[RobertaFermina]

I hear that you are concerned for your relationship to your wife and children.

There is plenty of advice here about telling/not-telling, and managing the information trail. Good Luck, which ever path you choose.

It seems more important to meditate on what is so beautiful about your relationship with your wife and children that you would be so sad to lose them, or have something come between you.

I believe you will weather this storm in good shape, or bad. You can recover from the worst consequences if you carry yourself through adversity with humility, strength, and integrity.

I would put the greater importance upon how you wake up every day and remind yourself about these precious beings that you have the privilege to care for and enjoy, and how you will carry yourself, take your actions and keep your Word to repay Creation for your ticket to this party.

What you do every day from today forward will give you the consciousness and build up the character to cut through any pink fog and sustain you as a role model, protector, and nurturer of your precious family.

All my heart opens to the ache you report feeling, May creation's Love flow upon you and yours !

Be Well.

:rose: Roberta :rose: