does anyone feel different ,now that been on hormones for a few yrs ?

[Wendi {LI NY}]

well .I do . I dont have the desier to get all DOLL UP< it has become a chore now . My tg Girlfriends said that I am no fun any more ..
I also dont get that crazy about going out to clubs. I enjoy going to lunch and a little shopping .or just sitting home reading a good book and great glass of wine. As far as dressing femme ,give me a nice blouse and slacks and I am good to go !:D Wendi

[JOEY88]

do you still want to be a women

[Mezimi]

heh, maybe u lost the thrill and exploration in it all... so it is just a normal aspect of life to u. I prefer it like that anyway :)

[AmberTG]

Wendi, you sound like a typical woman, nothing wrong with that!
Ask any 10 women if they get dolled up regularly, I'd bet 9 of them would say no.

[melissaK]

I'm coming up on a year on hormones, without real life transisitioning (RLT) or full time living (FTL). I'm 53 and I have lost track of the cycles of CDing pink fog and SRS transistioning desire I have fought my whole life. It's very different now, and its the hormones.

And I want to venture this thought to the Harry Benjamen guideline creators and modifiers out there, before RLT/FTL every T girl should consider going on hormones. Not huge 5-8 mg/dy grow big boobs amounts, but normal middle age GG HRT 1-2 mg/dy amounts. It has calmed me across the board.

The manic pink-fog, the obsessive desires to change my body have all abated. I still cross dress, but its very much like Wendi suggests - blouse and some chic jeans and I'm content.

I think low hormones is an underexplored option. Certainly its not going to be every t-girls shining path, but its an option.

And if I have a giant pink-fog flare up I'll change my theory. But I feel so different inside that I just don't see that as likely.

hugs
'lissa

[CharlaineCadence]

Ok this might sound dumb but... If you look at the natrually born women and look at their growth pattern. You can see that they go through the same stages as we as transwomen do. They start out as we do exploring everything, dolling up when erver they can, ect. then as they grow they begin to slow down, learning that they can be themselves and beautiful without dolling up all the time. In our way we go through an adloesence of our own. we start out exploring everything, Wanting to go out all the time, dress up get pritty ect. Then we have our mellowing phase we begin to realize that we do not have to have the clothing or makeup to be women. that in fact we are women. so we begin to live as ourselves growing like children into our own women.

[Sharon]

A few years? Heck, Wendi, you're practically describing me and I've only been on meds since January.:happy:

I usually make myself up to a minimum, although I usually manage to at least put some coverup on when I go out, mostly, however, just to hide the few stray hairs that haven't yet fallen victim to my electrolysis treatments.

The point of your post, if I'm reading it correctly, is that once we make this transition, the novelty soon wears off and we slide into a routine, just as every other person does. I just like to break out of my rut every now and then and remind myself that looking my best can make me feel good, such as when I go out with some friends.

[Ashly]

...... but normal middle age GG HRT 1-2 mg/dy amounts. It has calmed me across the board. ......

Feel exactly the same way. It all calmed me down...feel better then ever..even the blood pressure is normal ;)

However, I still can't find any fun in wearing pants/jeans whatsoever.

[Scotty]

I'm the same way - don't have the desire to get dolled up very often.
I enjoy silky pajamas and other female items around the house...

Part of me thinks the thrill wore off, but I'm still me - female inside...and partly outside...

[MJ]

well .I do . I dont have the desier to get all DOLL UP< it has become a chore now . My tg Girlfriends said that I am no fun any more ..
I also dont get that crazy about going out to clubs. I enjoy going to lunch and a little shopping .or just sitting home reading a good book and great glass of wine. As far as dressing femme ,give me a nice blouse and slacks and I am good to go !:D Wendi

omg you must be my long lost twin sister :eek: i feel the same way you do lol

[melissaK]

However, I still can't find any fun in wearing pants/jeans whatsoever.


I'm hopelessly a child of the 60's . . . hip huggers still are galmour to me. :heehee: How did Neil Diamond put it " forever in blue jeans . . . " (OK, my nose is growing, I don't like blue jeans ALL the time . . . there IS a time for Prada and Lancone)

hugs,
'lissa

[Wendi {LI NY}]

omg you must be my long lost twin sister :eek: i feel the same way you do lol

Hi Sis , Well I am very ,very glad that there are others like me . HEY , Maybe I will get Doll -up and go to a club? [lol] Serious thank you for the comments .I am not alone :hugs: W
Wendi

[Cara Allen]

Hi, Mellissa! I found your post really interesting, as I am in your "boat!" I am also mid 50's and I want to start horemone therapy... working with my therapist. I wonder if you have noticed any other changes with a low dose prescription, after a year? Have you had any breast development? changes to hip or butt size? Skin softness? I am trying to work out options, and while I want some boobies, I cannot see how I can fill a C Cup and keep my life going... Small boobs, some development in hips and bumm would be desired, but I think I must go for very very gradual changes to allow me for a controlled transition... Can you please tell me? Seems like you have had some really nice emotional adjustments, and that is sooo important...
I'm coming up on a year on hormones, without real life transisitioning (RLT) or full time living (FTL). I'm 53 and I have lost track of the cycles of CDing pink fog and SRS transistioning desire I have fought my whole life. It's very different now, and its the hormones.

And I want to venture this thought to the Harry Benjamen guideline creators and modifiers out there, before RLT/FTL every T girl should consider going on hormones. Not huge 5-8 mg/dy grow big boobs amounts, but normal middle age GG HRT 1-2 mg/dy amounts. It has calmed me across the board.

The manic pink-fog, the obsessive desires to change my body have all abated. I still cross dress, but its very much like Wendi suggests - blouse and some chic jeans and I'm content.

I think low hormones is an underexplored option. Certainly its not going to be every t-girls shining path, but its an option.

And if I have a giant pink-fog flare up I'll change my theory. But I feel so different inside that I just don't see that as likely.

hugs
'lissa

[Cara Allen]

Hi, Char!

I agree completely. It is complicated more, in a pre horemone , pre transition phase, because we have so much "maleness" to overcome, that CD's tend to go "to the wall" with dressed, skirts, nylons, all the time. Now, I love doing that, and would prefer to dress that way, but after doinbg this for such a long time, I know that this is not "normal woman" behavior. It's nice once in a while, but all the time? I'd be spending an hour and a half, every day to do that. Unless you had a job that dictates your dressing stylishly, it would be weird to do that, just to go to the grocery store...
Ok this might sound dumb but... If you look at the natrually born women and look at their growth pattern. You can see that they go through the same stages as we as transwomen do. They start out as we do exploring everything, dolling up when erver they can, ect. then as they grow they begin to slow down, learning that they can be themselves and beautiful without dolling up all the time. In our way we go through an adloesence of our own. we start out exploring everything, Wanting to go out all the time, dress up get pritty ect. Then we have our mellowing phase we begin to realize that we do not have to have the clothing or makeup to be women. that in fact we are women. so we begin to live as ourselves growing like children into our own women.

[Ashly]

Cara Allen...I started about 7 years ago..low dosage..2mg daily. After about 2 years I saw the changes you mentioned...b-cup boobs..smaller waist (strange?) ..more hips..softer skin..a bag full of emotions. Overall I am very happy and healthy. I am 60 now.

[Cara Allen]

May I ask, does your job allow you to transition? How loong were you able to maintain before you started "showing?"
Thanks!

Cara Allen...I started about 7 years ago..low dosage..2mg daily. After about 2 years I saw the changes you mentioned...b-cup boobs..smaller waist (strange?) ..more hips..softer skin..a bag full of emotions. Overall I am very happy and healthy. I am 60 now.

[AmberTG]

Cara, some info from a short timer on HRT. I take 2mg of estrogen daily, considered to be a low dose. I've been doing it for about 8 months now and my boobs are shaped quite differently now, although they don't have much size yet. My waist is a bit smaller now also, but that might be from a bit of weight loss. I'd like to think that the bit of "middle age spread" that I was developing has gone to my butt and hips, but I couldn't prove it with a tape measure.
My skin is softer and my nails are thinner and break more easily now. The jury is still out on the body hair thing, I never had much body hair before, but I find it easier to shave my legs now.

[Cara Allen]

Thanks for the information... It is really appreciated!
Cara, some info from a short timer on HRT. I take 2mg of estrogen daily, considered to be a low dose. I've been doing it for about 8 months now and my boobs are shaped quite differently now, although they don't have much size yet. My waist is a bit smaller now also, but that might be from a bit of weight loss. I'd like to think that the bit of "middle age spread" that I was developing has gone to my butt and hips, but I couldn't prove it with a tape measure.
My skin is softer and my nails are thinner and break more easily now. The jury is still out on the body hair thing, I never had much body hair before, but I find it easier to shave my legs now.

[Cara Allen]

Can anyone tell me... I have also read that your upper torso looses defilition and size... Is this true? Not top heavy anymore?

[melissaK]

Hi, Mellissa! I found your post really interesting, as I am in your "boat!" I am also mid 50's and I want to start horemone therapy... working with my therapist. I wonder if you have noticed any other changes with a low dose prescription, after a year? Have you had any breast development? changes to hip or butt size? Skin softness? I am trying to work out options, and while I want some boobies, I cannot see how I can fill a C Cup and keep my life going... Small boobs, some development in hips and bumm would be desired, but I think I must go for very very gradual changes to allow me for a controlled transition... Can you please tell me? Seems like you have had some really nice emotional adjustments, and that is sooo important...

Cara,

Every girls path is unique. I have had CD/TS desires all my life. But I spent years avoiding them. About 15-17 years ago I got a grip on myself enough to seriously think through transistioning. I opted not to.

I opted for intentional repression of CD/TS feelings in order to hang on to a traditional Ward Cleaver lifestyle (wife, kids, house, cars and a six figure salary). I am a good role player and I can lose myself in my at work professional role, at home Dad role, spare-time car-nut hobby role, etc.

Role playing means you aren't dealing with your own emotional needs. It has been a very hard path with increasing mental health problems from emotional repression.

Despite seeing a therapist along the way, I had a pretty serious mental health breakdown a year ago (depression coupled with DID issues). It meant I had to do something. I wasn't going to last doing what I had been doing.

This led me to try the low E approach. It has restored my mental health to a significant degree. I still have the Damocles-like Sword of full time transitioning hanging over my emotional self, but I'm coping with it without the self destructive mental health problems.

My transition desires abate when my dosage is about 3+mg a day (I weigh 150 lbs, 5'7", am in good health, got blood work done to check liver function, and I don't use any spiro). But at 3+ I get breast growth. Not my goal (in my heart of hearts it is, but this aging male body isn't going to be passable without a herculean effort by plastic surgeons and hair transplant specialists - if they could move all the hair on my body to my head I'd be home free ;^).

When I am at 1-2 mgs a day breast growth seems to stop, but transition desires recur to some lesser degree. I'm not so much measuring breast growth by cup size, as judging by sensitivity and firm tissue swelling behind the nipples. As it is, in a year I've gone from dead flat to an A-. I notice, but no one else does - lots of Gmen have fat there and are more developed there than I am. (And I monitor my weight closely so I know I am not just gaining weight generally.)

I also notice my sex drive gets pretty hammered at 3+ mgs. Sperm count is 0, so you better be done with kids. Arousal is slow and penis volume less, and I start thinking about viagra. At 1-2mgs arousal is more normal, but still slower and more mellowed compared to 0mg, but I dont' need viagra. (FWIW I have never used Viagra.)

As for other side effects, like less body hair - I haven't seen that. I'm pretty hairy. A fat ass, nope. Wider hips, nope. Skinnier waist - nope. Emotional lability- I've always cried easily and have more typically fit a sterotypical woman's emotional response than a mans, so no change there either.

Six months ago I dropped back to zero for 45 days to see what would happen. As the E worked out of my system I certainly didn't need viagra, but, transitioning desires came back with a vengeance and my mental health quickly deteriorated. So, back on E. Everything smoothed out after about 10-20 days.

So, If I grew to an A- in a year (with a two month time out), where will I be in five years? They say you can expect breat growth to take after your own Mom to some degree, and if so, I am in trouble as she was an honest D. Well, you see my concern as B+ cups on a guy will get comments and they will not favorably impress my wife. I can't see this path working long term unless I want to deal with some real breasts.

Cara, you seem to be accepting of making a transition and you are ahead of me there as I still would prefer not to. I hope my comments add to your information base and help you sort out your own options and pick your own path.

hugs,
'lissa

[Cara Allen]

Gosh, Lissa, I feel so unhappy for you... That is truly stuck in the middle. Did you say how old you were?

I am through with the kids phase, my kids are grown. I am willing to do whatever it takes to accomplish transition sensibily. However, there is the job thing to think about. I am not in a field that will allow that, so I will have to retrain. At my age (56,) I will probably be doing a desk job somewhere for reduced money, but I can't keep this up. I expect my quality of life to be much better, and that is a trade I am eager and willing to make. The trick is a peaceful, long transition (5 years?) that will allow me to find and fit into a new lifestyle. Light dose horemones would be about right for me. I have begun to talk this over with my SO, and she will probably be supportive. We'll see, and for sure, I will keep everyone posted.

[Maggie Kay]

I now am taking 1.5 MG estradiol gel daily and 50 mg spiro. It is enough to keep my mental state borderline stable and yet not too much to have a lot of worries about health risks. I'm 56, 5' 10" and weigh 198 lbs. I have changed my hormone regimen from using a progestrone/estradiol/estrone/estriol cream and 1800 mg Cimetidine. It worked for about 5 years but lately the cream supplier changed formulas and I got super sensitive to P causing depression. It also cost me $200 a month. I had an acid refux condition that the cimetidine cured and I kept taking it because it is an anti-androgen. Not as strong as Spiro. Now I spend $50 a month.

I developed a fair amount of breast tissue, just under a B cup. I lost a huge amount of muscle mass and strength. My head hair stopped falling out and instead of being like my grandfather on my mothers side who was bald, I have a fairly nice head of hair. Then again I started before a lot was lost. My skin became very soft and smooth and easily cut making mechanical work very hard. Glove are a must. Now on the new regimen, I have sore nipples again, growing there again. My spirits are way up but not euphoric. I do cry easily and still worry about being a transwoman (just a lot less, now).

However, I do still have the same problems as before, I still want to be me and please others which often hurts me. I find that getting called "Sir" at the post office or store lately cuts me like a knife. One clerk did it about 6 times on Saturday and it really hurt a lot more than usual. I felt like everyone in line was turning their heads and staring as he said it. He didn't do it to be hurtful. He knows I am a GM but won't use another title because he is a non native English speaker. Others there avoid the term and with me.

I tried to go with the HBSOC with a therapist and endo but everything went wrong. My funds to pay for the care evaporated. I am one of those who are forced to self med. and I feel badly about it. It makes me feel even more like a social outcast. I don't want to be viewed as a nutcase or freak because TG is so badly handled in our society. Just because I express a different gender than what is between my legs doesn't mean I am a mental case or should be treated with disrespect.

[Wendi {LI NY}]

However, I do still have the same problems as before, I still want to be me and please others which often hurts me. I find that getting called "Sir" at the post office or store lately cuts me like a knife. One clerk did it about 6 times on Saturday and it really hurt a lot more than usual. I felt like everyone in line was turning their heads and staring as he said it. He didn't do it to be hurtful. He knows I am a GM but won't use another title because he is a non native English speaker. Others there avoid the term and with me.

[/FONT]I tried to go with the HBSOC with a therapist and endo but everything went wrong. My funds to pay for the care evaporated. I am one of those who are forced to self med. and I feel badly about it. It makes me feel even more like a social outcast. I don't want to be viewed as a nutcase or freak because TG is so badly handled in our society. Just because I express a different gender than what is between my legs doesn't mean I am a mental case or should be treated with disrespect. [/QUOTE]

I hate that word SIR , I get it only sometimes now ,when someone thinks he or she figures me out ! My comment is ,GEE you must been at the top of your class! ASSHOLE! It is very ,very dis-hearting to hear . Wendi:mad:

[Kimberley]

Pretty much describes me on any day and I am not on hormones although I wish I were. Still it is nice once in a while to get dressed to the nines.

:hugs:
Kimberley

[helenr]

I am 60, have been a transvestite since age 5-6, realized I am more of a transsexual the past 10 years. Started anti androgens last December, estrogen patch in May. I find the 'fetish' aspect of crossdressing is gone, which is positive, as well as any typical 'male sexuality' response. I still enjoy dressing en femme under male drab but it isn't a physically titilating experience but mentally satisfying. Re body effects, I feel that I have lost 'pool privileges' due to my obvious breast development. It isn't anything radical, but the shape of the breasts, pouty nipples and immediate underlying flesh don't 'look male' anymore. Being fairly light (140 lbs now with more fluid retention, I suppose) I can't pass off my development as man boobs as we see on larger individuals. So, hiding this change from co workers could be a challenge. As I am retired, I am not in this dilemma. I am married to a sweet, tolerating (for now) woman and I do fear her negative reaction to body changes. I tried to go without the patch for a week or two and found myself 'compelled' to resume applying it. I like my little titties, though I know that it isn't always easy to go back to flat chest again. Tough decision, but being a closet transvestite for a half century was that easy either. hugs to you all, helen

[Ashly]

Cara Allen...I am semi-retired..I work in an office (much less money..) owned by a very understanding female. Let's say I wanted to go all the way I would have to spend lots of $$ to get my face done ;)...Right now, I can still go to the beach wearing a looser fitting t-shirt.

[Cara Allen]

Hi, Helen!

A couple of questions please?

First of all, you have breast development since just May? What dose do you take?

Because of your age, did the therapist/doctor give you a run-around?

Glad that the estrgen makes you happy.

I am hearing from quite a few people that horemones keep the urge to dress quiet, and that they won't stop the treatment out of sadness.

I THINK I HAVE FOUND THE CURE FOR TRANSGENDERISM!!! ESTROGEN!!!


I am 60, have been a transvestite since age 5-6, realized I am more of a transsexual the past 10 years. Started anti androgens last December, estrogen patch in May. I find the 'fetish' aspect of crossdressing is gone, which is positive, as well as any typical 'male sexuality' response. I still enjoy dressing en femme under male drab but it isn't a physically titilating experience but mentally satisfying. Re body effects, I feel that I have lost 'pool privileges' due to my obvious breast development. It isn't anything radical, but the shape of the breasts, pouty nipples and immediate underlying flesh don't 'look male' anymore. Being fairly light (140 lbs now with more fluid retention, I suppose) I can't pass off my development as man boobs as we see on larger individuals. So, hiding this change from co workers could be a challenge. As I am retired, I am not in this dilemma. I am married to a sweet, tolerating (for now) woman and I do fear her negative reaction to body changes. I tried to go without the patch for a week or two and found myself 'compelled' to resume applying it. I like my little titties, though I know that it isn't always easy to go back to flat chest again. Tough decision, but being a closet transvestite for a half century was that easy either. hugs to you all, helen

[melissaK]

I THINK I HAVE FOUND THE CURE FOR TRANSGENDERISM!!! ESTROGEN!!!

A conclusion you will find at the end of Ann Vitale's writings/essays as well.

"After more than fifty years of treating gender issues hormonally, it is beyond dispute that despite some possible negative physical side effects, the introduction of cross-sex hormones has proven to be the center piece of a successful treatment regimen for this population. "

from: http://www.avitale.com/hbigdatalkplus2005.htm, See also her earlier 2003 paper/essay: http://www.avitale.com/developmentalreview.htm

hugs,
'lissa

PS. Cara, I'm 53. It's in some post of mine somewhere. And of course for Captain Lex and crew, the cures the T on his good ship.

[Shelly R]

well .I do . I dont have the desier to get all DOLL UP< it has become a chore now . My tg Girlfriends said that I am no fun any more ..
I also dont get that crazy about going out to clubs. I enjoy going to lunch and a little shopping .or just sitting home reading a good book and great glass of wine. As far as dressing femme ,give me a nice blouse and slacks and I am good to go !:D Wendi

Hello Wendi!
Good for you!
Yes, even I feel differently after 3 years. I don't have to try so hard anymore. My features are feminine enough I don't worry about it anymore. Getting dolled up is a pain, except for going out to a nice restaurant. normally I wear coulotts, wedges, nice blouse, I don't spend any more than 15 minutes on makeup, mascara, blush and lipstick. I do spend a lot of time on my hair though, wash and setting every 4 or 5 days, setting (drying) takes 20 minutes, maybe. Out the door ASAP. I have one good note I have had two friends ask me if I have had FFS recently, no just the hormones :) It's no longer important for me to go to clubs, I get enough time out in other ways.
I think much of why we no longer spend large ammounts of time getting ready any more, is the fact we are comfortable with the way we look, are more experienced with the lifestyle, and have received the validation we needed to become more like the rest of the female population.

Michelle "Shelly"