How Long do You Want to Live?

[CaptLex]

There's a thread in the MtF section about women living longer than men. It reminded me that the first thing I was told when I asked my doc for testosterone is that it will cut my life expectancy. I know that may not be true in all cases, as it depends on other factors, but if it is, I don't have a problem with that - I'd rather live ten more years as a boy than 40 more years as a girl. And in any case, I don't want to live forever. I hope to make every day from now on count so that if I die sooner rather than later, I won't feel that I've left the party too soon. Now that Mom is in a nursing home surrounded by depressingly sick and incapacitated old people, I don't see what's so great about living that long anyway. No thanks. So, my question to you guys is: how long do you want to live? And is it a concern to you that men generally live shorter lives?

[SirTrey]

I can only answer that question this way because I'm not on "T"....Not yet, anyway....Because I emotionally and psychologically AM a guy....100%.....and because My role in My family is to BE the guy, I take on all of the pressures and stress that entails....so I probably WILL live a shorter life anyway, "T" or no "T".....I also tend to internalize My stress as men do....I know some people will disagree, but I strongly dislike crying and do My very best NOT to...which is also a factor, I'm sure.....but....I would rather live ten years as a guy than forty as a woman....absolutely....so if I die sooner as a result, I don't care....It's all about the ride and not the destination for Me...and this is My ride. **Trey**

[Cai]

I'd like to live long enough to feel like I've accomplished something with my life. I'm planning on being in med school until I'm 30, at which point I'll finally start my career. To then only live to be 45 or 50 would feel like a waste of time - I'd have spent more years earning the job than actually working it.

I dunno. I mean, I'd love to live to be 100, to see the changes in the world over that long of a timespan. But I wouldn't want to even see 60 if I wasn't happy and relatively independent.

[Adam]

i dont mind how long i live everyday i take a breath is a gift and that could be taken away any day im fine with that too

[JamesAlan]

I try to live by an old indian saying, "Today will be a great day to die." The thinking behind that is to not live with regrets and not to fear death. I have no regrets in my past. I look forward to the future for once in my life, it doesn't scare me. If my future is shortened due to T, then oh well. The thing that I truely live for is the day. If I don't get a tomorrow, I need to have a good day today. Live each day as though it were your last. That's what I'm trying to do know.

[nataliecd77]

I couldn't reall tell you Lex how long I want to live. Sometimes I'd like to live forever, but at others times I doubt that would be as nice as most think it is. I'd like to live long enough to see my grandchildren I guess. But I know all to well, that life is short and can always end unexpectedly, so I try to live my life well enough that if Today was my last day I wouldn't leave with too many regrets. So I guess I'd settle for 100 happy years or 40 depressing years anyways.
Natalie

[CaptLex]

I try to live by an old indian saying, "Today will be a great day to die."
Sounds like that old Klingon expression, "Today is a good day to die!" Good attitude, James, live for today - no regrets. :thumbsup:

EDIT: Well said, Natalie. :)

[Dasein9]

Forever.

[Sharon]

I'd rather live ten more years as a boy than 40 more years as a girl.

This is exactly my feelings also, Lex, 'tho I'm coming at this from the opposite direction. Hmm..., no one told me that I may live longer because of the meds. I just figure that I have a long time to go since people in my family routinely live into their eighties, with a few doing well to age 100 or so.

To answer your question, I want to live as long as I'm healthy enough to enjoy it.

[caderemington]

I don't know, I guess I'm feeling pretty cynical and everything, but I just don't want to live. I know that sounds harsh and everything, but its what I'm feeling. :sad:

[Dasein9]

I don't know, I guess I'm feeling pretty cynical and everything, but I just don't want to live. I know that sounds harsh and everything, but its what I'm feeling. :sad:


Cade, :hugs:

I know things are rough right now. And we're here for you. But I don't think any one of us is a proper counselor, and it sounds like you may need more than we have to offer. But your school has such a thing, and you've already paid for it with your tuition, most likely. (Schools have to have counseling available to avoid lawsuits -- for once, things work in our favour!)

Please, please, please look into an appointment at Student Services, or your school's equivalent.

:hugs:

[ZenFrost]

I don't much care how long I live. Just so long as I attain enlightenment before I die. :winkp:

[Tristan]

I don't know, I guess I'm feeling pretty cynical and everything, but I just don't want to live. I know that sounds harsh and everything, but its what I'm feeling. :sad:

Aww, Cade, :hugs: I've been there, end of my rope, not sure how I'd get up another day. Life can really suck at times, but it doesn't always suck. It may be hard to see it right now, but things do turn around. I agree with Das on maybe seeing someone at the school for some help. Most of all know you got a lot of friends here who care about you. :hugs:

[John]

cade: :hugs:

In the words of Eddie Izzard, I want to live untill I die, no more, no less.

[Lisa Golightly]

Well I wish you boys all long lives so you can enjoy all those lost years (and provide me with the most interesting things to read)... Myself? The best bang since the big one will suffice for me ;)

[trannie T]

A long life does not necessarily equal a happy life. I'd rather have quality rather than quantity.

[Syr_SwitchyGQ]

My mom tells me that ever since I was rather small I'd told her (repeatedly) that I thought my life would be short and that I probably wouldn't live past thirty five. (Creepy, I know.) That said, I really hope I live long enough to do something with my life. Other than that... oh well.

Cade... I know we talked about this already... but... :hugs: feel better, ok?

[Dee Talbot]

Years ago, Barb had to decide whether or not to take lithium for a bipolar variant, in spite of the shortening of her life span from the medication. She decided to take it and be happy, even if it meant a shorter life span. It wasn't my decision to make for her, but I preferred less time with her that was happy to more time with her in misery.

And then the point was moot because she couldn't take the medication due to a reaction.

As for me, I don't really know how long I want to live. My greatest fear and dread though is outliving any of my children.

Dee

[boi_0h]

I don't want to live to be old unless I can have a good quality of life, as far as the effects of T on life expectancy, I agree with you Lex...if i can live 1/4 of the time i would've had as a female as a male I'd take it no questions asked.

[DanielMacBride]

When I was younger I used to tease my kids and say I planned on being around till I'm at least 100 so I can crack them around the knees with my walking stick if they give me cheek....

Now, I really don't care. Aside from Sammi, I have nothing to really live for (and even that's a bit shaky right now as to whether I have her...) and if I got hit by a bus tomorrow I really wouldn't be upset about it. I think I'd probably be relieved actually.

Daniel

[veronica]

it's already been too long at 47

[Abraxas]

I want to live exactly as long as my mother does. Cos if she kicks off before me, I'm toast anyway. Just plain won't be able to function.

Me? Mama's boy? Nooooo, never.

[mistunderstood]

I want to live till same sex marriage is legal,lone enough till I can have full srs and then maybe if all that happens then we can discuss longer pass thoe's goals.

[happyfish]

Long enough.

[Taylor105]

This question really hits home for me right now. I am facing a scary situation with my health and I just really want to live. In the past I have been suicidal and thought that I just didn't want to live another day. But knowing I may not even have a choice in the matter is simply not okay with me. I want to live. And I will fight every day for the best life I can have. But I do agree with everyone who says they would rather have quality than quantity. So I'm kinda torn right now. Living every day in sickening physical pain is not how I want to live either.

[pocoyo]

*gives Taylor a big hug* :hugs:


-----

Ok I am a bit slow and tired today and finding it hard to make sense, but I'll try haha!:

That life shortening thing... that men live shorter than women.
I have sort of done a bit of research on it before, and I don't think its specifically/entirely because of T. Although that does play a factor. But a factor which I THINK can be overcome...

It seems to be because of a whole host of factors... e.g. lifestyles, men tend to smoke more and drink more for instance (or used to), and men's jobs are often more dangerous or more stressful (or used to be), and bioligically because often (& it used to be that) the mother was the main nurturing parent so it made more sense/didn't matter as much if the dad shuffled off sooner, 'cos he wasn't doing as much caring for the kid - caring which ensures the continuation of the species - as the mother.
Also because women are (or used to be) more beauty and health oriented, and so look(ed) after themselves better, and are also more likely to go to the doctors if they feel ill.
And also because men are more likely (here is where a lot of the T comes in) ... men are more likely to take risks with their health and like get in fights with a shorter fuse or do "macho things" (although I think this can apply to women with pmt too LOL).
Also the other reason T is "bad" and potentially life-shortening is because it encourages bad cholestorol, wheras female hormones actually decrease bad cholestoral and raises good cholestoral and also makes your body store fat more efficiently and safely.
The areas in which male hormones make you store fat (abdomen) is much more dangerous than if you carry weight around your hips for instance (which female hormones encourage).

It used to be pretty equal because in the olden days a lot of women died in child-birth/in child-bearing related things. But with better healthcare it became that women's life expectancy got longer. (In some countries that child-birth thing still applies, and there's different statistics for different countries).
Some reports say that the gap is way closing up again because women do so many more dangerous activities like males these days (e.g smoking and drinking, eating bad food etc).


If anyones reading this thread feeling a bit scared like "Oh shit... I'm scared to go on T because it might shorten my life"

Well please don't be too scared or worried! I think that ... looking at the evidence... basically, if you actually really look after yourself by eating well and sleeping well and exercising regularly then it shouldn't affect your life too much.

But don't take my word for it incase I'm wrong LOL! (Do some research for yourself if you're worried... weigh up the pros and cons... I just didn't want anyone getting all fed up about it because it might actually be manageable as part of a healthy lifestyle - and attitude!)

(HAHA not that cap was meaning to scare anyone!!.. but just incase anyone was a little worried as a side effect lol).


P.S. I probably left a load of important stuff out, sorry! :p

[CaptLex]

I probably left a load of important stuff out, sorry! :p
No, I think you were very thorough, except for one thing . . . you didn't answer the question. :p

[Kieron Andrew]

No, I think you were very thorough, except for one thing . . . you didn't answer the question. :p

:lol2: Lex im glad it wasnt just me that thought...wtf he didnt even answer the question after all that lol

[pocoyo]

Haha I only popped in to be reassuring, not to answer the question :p

But anyway, everyone knows I have elvish blood...

[CaptLex]

:lol2: Lex im glad it wasnt just me that thought...wtf he didnt even answer the question after all that lol

Well, he did warn us that he's slow and tired today - and after all those facts, he probably didn't even notice the question. It was interesting to read and it's good info for us guys to have, but all the while I was reading it I couldn't wait to get to the answer. And then he was gone . . . :idontknow:

It's okay, Poccy, we still love you - and thanks for doing and posting the research. :koc:

EDIT: See, he did it again . . . "poof" and he's gone. :p

[BarbaraTalbot]

I think Poco is right about this being a very manageable health risk. Men do die earlier, but look at 'em (present company excluded of course - you all obviously seem to take care of yourselves) They tend to let themselves go A LOT especially as middle age hits. No one chides them for the extra weight, the sedentary lifestyle (nothing wrong with that as I type type type the night away...)

When men die younger it is from accidents and or violence. this skews the numbers a bit. The remainder die eventually of maintenance issues. Hardening of the arteries and other heat issues lead the way. Cancer is next and both of these can be less likely with regular screenings and better diets that men tend to avoid. I wouldn't worry to much about it, all the men in my family lived to 80+ and no shortage of self manufactured T here!

Seriously though there may be specific risks associated with the actual T in which case whatever the health risk associated with it is, you simply take the steps that you can to minimize that same risk in other ways,usually the old standby your healthy intake of nutrient and exerciser for the body to rid it self of undesirable elements.

Don't some of the other transmen procedures reduce risks such as a mastectomy eliminating breast tissue as a possible source for future cancer? (which of course men can have and usually wouldn't think to have it checked)

[Albtraum]

Agreed on the quality over quantity preference. As long as I'm Hoss enough to do some of what I want to do and have enough marbles rolling around to remember who I am (if I live long enough to get senile).

That's how I feel NOW. I've seen plenty change their minds on down the road.

[jsoto81]

I don't care about length, i know it sounds cliche. But to be honest I've already died once so I don't care how long i live, just how I live. I want to live knowing that everyone in my life is happy, that they know I love them and that appreciated them, because if I can achieve that then I'll live forever.

[Anthony Jake]

I really dont know how long i would want to live for.
I sometimes wish that i wouldnt live anymore, and somedays im quite happy to exist.
Im hoping when i go to college i will feel better and less alone and more like i want to live a life as me.
I only want to live if i have a reason for living; i have sat many days and nights and wondered to myself why we exist... in the end we will all die and very few people will be remembered..so really why are we fighting to exist?
( i shan't bore you with more of my ranting on existance... )
I work in a nursing home at the moment, all the residents are female except for one man.. i just dont want to end up the way those people do..
I think id be happy if i got to about 60 really..but as my life goes on and i start to become more of who i want to be and do more of what i want to do i may decide id like to stick around longer :happy: