Is it odd?

[Tobie]

I've noticed that for the most part, folks on this forum(not just this area, but the whole thing) have a very clear:

a) This is what I was born like.
b) This is what I want to be accepted as now that I'm an adult.

For me.. I find myself floating a bit, though more specifically in this area of the forums. Why? Because I would 'categorize' myself as bigender. I do live my life primarily as a female, and I have no problem with my female parts(though for a plus size gal, I have awfully small boobs). I also live part of my life as a male, because it is a part of me. I don't want to transition, I have an interest in doing so. I DO have an interest in learning to appear male in public so that I don't feel confined to my home when I'm in a male mood.

OK, my train of thought for this whole topic went kaboom.. I'll be back when baby stops crying.

[CaptLex]

No, not odd at all. Lots of people are in-between and/or fluctuate depending on their mood that day. Nothing wrong with that. :happy:

[SirTrey]

Tiergan,
I'm sure it can be confusing to be caught in the "middle ground" of all of this...but...all of us are to one degree or another....Just depends on the percentage....There is nothing cut and dry about being trans whatsoever....and each person experiences it completely differently....When you think about all of the different factors involved, that being genetics, gender identity, sexual preference, and more....plus....add to that the societal and familial influences and pressures to conform....it's no wonder that you, and a lot of others, are confused....You are who you are, just be the best YOU that you can be....whoever and whatever that is, both in the moment and overall....Self acceptance and comfort is the key here, IMHO....for all of us. **Trey**

[Syr_SwitchyGQ]

No... bigender is not odd... and as has been said before there are different degrees of trans... for example, I love presenting as male and passing as male, but I don't have a long back history to anything trans. I never wore my daddy's ties as a kid. I never got mistaken for a boy (well, ok, when I was a baby and bald for two years, but that doesn't count) as a child. I did all sorts of girly things and enjoyed many of them. I currently have no desire to be on T or transition fully or whatnot. However, I do still consider myself trans. So... you're not alone, nor does your identity make you odd.

[privateperks]

Gender is a spectrum, just like sexuality - so, why wouldn't some people be in the middle? Ain't nothing odd about that. I'd consider myself pretty much in the middle as well and that doesn't really bother me as much as it used to. Used to be I felt like I had to play for one team or the other but these days - I just don't believe in two teams.

[Tobie]

....... (well, ok, when I was a baby and bald for two years, but that doesn't count).....

I had to giggle at this part.. my mother is fond of reminding me that I was bald until I was four.

Thank you everyone. :hugs: I just feel a bit out of sorts here sometimes.. because I'm not strictly one gender or the either. I'm both(mentally at least, my body's definitely female), and finding just the right niche to fit in is hard.

[Victoria Anne]

Tiergan I don't know if I should reply here as I am MTF but we do share being trans? The advise you have been given is sound after all we are but a small thread in this tapestry of life are we not ? sepeate we are all different but together we do make a grand pattern. Just be the best person you can be , be true to yourself.:hugs:
viccy

[ZenFrost]

This isn't the first thread that's brought this up. A lot of people are in the middle here. In fact I think we all are in some way or another. But this isn't a place where people are judgmental about that kind of thing, because we're all on the Trans spectrum somewhere, it just happens to be a huge spectrum.

Don't feel bad about being what you are, and don't think we're gonna dislike you 'cause your 'not man enough' or something silly like that. We don't believe in absolutes, and we don't expect you to be strictly one or another.

[DW]

Who says that any of us HAVE to fit into a nich? We are who we are, niches be damned. I am genetic male, like dressing fem. I don't consider myself as being in anyone's nich, just my own.

[DanielMacBride]

You know, this is one of the biggest things I have come to terms with since I realised that my physical appearance does not match my gender - firstly, there are no absolutes with gender, it is a fairly fluid thing; and secondly, almost every transperson I have ever spoken to tells me that their gender doesn't stay in one spot on the spectrum so to speak.

It took me a while to get my head around this because I had been so well trained in the binary gender thing, and some days it still messes with me ;) But what I have found is that regardless of how I can express it or what it feels like, the only major issue I have with my gender is other people's perceptions! ;) Some days I am totally Daniel, others I feel more like a butch girl - but that's okay because that's just different facets of the complex being that is me, being expressed :)

As others have said, just be you - thats all anyone can really aspire to ;)

:hugs:
Daniel