Safety Man

[Maggie Kay]

I subscribe to a podcast called Selected Shorts from National Public Radio
http://www.npr.org/rss/podcast/podcast_detail.php?siteId=9911210
One recent story is by Dan Chaon called "Safety Man" . It is the story of a young widow who uses a full size inflatable ladies companion as a visual deterrent against criminals. She uses this figure in her car and places him in the widow at night. The story goes on to discuss her fears and musings about having to live each day with constant fear and anxiety. In the end, she begins to talk to Safety Man as a spouse and he tells her "You think that someday you are going to hit bottom. I'm here to tell you that there is no bottom." In each day no matter what fears we face or what impossible situation we have, there still are daily needs to me met. There are children to feed, work to do, taking care of the mundane things of daily life. These will not go away. He then says " It will be alright" and she, as if to believe it herself, says "I agree" .
I was thinking of the constant anguish I have over being a Transwoman. Many hours of my day are lost mulling over this issue. I too worry that someday I will hit bottom. I fear that I will not be able to go on and do those daily things. This story helped me to realize that I have been making it and that it is possible to live this way. Day by day.

[Stephenie S]

Honey, honey, honey. How can you be in anguish over something as wonderful as transition? Please, please, try to dwell on the positives instead of the negatives. Here you are, finally living life the way you should have all along. Don't feel bad, dear, feel good!!

About the doll: I once worked at a marina in Baltimore where one of the boat owners had a full sized Indian he set up in the pilot house on his boat when he wasn't onboard. It freaked me out every time I saw it.

Lovies,
Stephenie

[Siobhan Marie]

Honey, honey, honey. How can you be in anguish over something as wonderful as transition? Please, please, try to dwell on the positives instead of the negatives. Here you are, finally living life the way you should have all along. Don't feel bad, dear, feel good!!

Oh Kay honey, I so agree with Stephenie on this, what is it that's worrying you? what is it that's bothering you. I envy you, can you believe that? because it's true. I so want to be where you are, living the life I should be living but I'm currently stuck in drab having to present as a man which isn't easy. Honey please please don't be sad, be happy if anyone deserves to be happy right now, it's you.

(goes over to Kay and gives her the biggest hug and cuddle that she can)

Lots of :love: and loads and loads of :hugs:

Siobhán x

[Maggie Kay]

You two are so sweet! Thanks so much!

I am anguish because my SO wants me to be no more female like than I am now and I am busting out all over to progress. This will inevitably lead to hurting her more and that makes me so sad. The new hormone regimen I am on makes me even more on the move toward full transition. I love her so much and to know that I will be causing her more pain in the future, is a terrible burden.