confussed

[malissa0311]

hello ladies im so confused right know i have been crossdressing for about 1 year now the more i do it the more i wish i was girl i realy feel that im a woman trapped in a mans boddy i have told my wife about my confusion and all she ask's is are you gay i am sort of attracted to men so does that mean that im gay. if any of you have any sugestions i would appreciate it and how would i start the process of becoming a woman so please help

thanks malissa

[MarinaTwelve200]

I would start with getting my feelings and motives straightened out. Yes, you could be trannsexual and a candidate for SRS, yes, you might be "gay", but these are the common, ordinary associations and "fears" or "speculations" most of us have with CDing. The "confusion" element comes about when something about one's own feelings do NOT quite agree or corespond with the KNOWN possibilities----"I may be gay, BUT..." or "well sorta, but..." statements are characteristic of this.

There are OTHER factors involved with CDing that have nothing to do with sexuality or gender. THESE are NOT obvuous to most people, yet can still be underlying causes or contributing factors to CDing. But sex and sexuality are so big a part of one's psyche, and CDing "Looks" to have certian "obvious" roots , that the other factors may be missed or ignored entirely.

This subject is quite complex, so I can only drop a few hints here and a few examples, just so you can see what I mean and give you other directions to search that might make more sense than your current state of "confusion".

Does CDing DO something for you? Sexual pleasure?, Stress releif and relaxation? altered state of mind? a "rush" or "High"? CDing or "effectively becomming a woman" MAY be the only way you know to achieve what you are after.---but not knowing whats really going on may interfere with exploreing other ways for the same effect.

Did it ever occur to you that you may be CDing to NOT become a woman, but rather "NOT be a man?"---or "NOT YOURSELF"---detaching from personal identity has several strong effects 1. A "rush" from breaking an internal "braiin taboo". the brain strives to protect its identy just as it strives for self preservation---hence a similar high is felt by those who risk their lives --as in the military or extreme sports. The Identity detatchment also is known to induce great relaxation or stress releif---as the worries and obligations associated with the other identity are "released" in the new, alternative identity. These effects may have been DISCOVERED by accident when you dressed for the first time (for whatever reason). It felt so good, you had to do it again, and again.---CDing was the only way you know how to get it, and you really might not know just WHAT the good feeling is.---until you really analyze yourself and forget about the gender, sexuality aspects of it for a while.

Other less obvious CD drives could be a FETISH for female clothing, etc. There is also a S/M element that is common "HUMILIATION" for example, despite our pride in seeing women as equals, there still is often an element of "degradation" or "loss of status" being associated with becomming one---hence ths "humiliation effect, which can be quite stimulating if one has S/M tendancies.

There are also other complex interactions of one or more other factors being involved.

My point is to GET AWAY from the sexuality/gender/TG possibilities and look for other reasons you may CD. It you ARE TS or GAY you likely WOULD know it, if the obvious possibilities dont make sense or are confusing, you are likely looking in the wrong direction for answers.

[Stephenie S]

Oh Marina, that was sooo well said. This should perhaps be a sticky.

Lovies,
Stephenie

[karla2016]

Yes you are!