Cultural influences

[Maggie Kay]

I found a reference to a cultural phenomenon in the US that occurred until the 1950's or so. Namely, this was that boys were raised in feminine clothes including dresses until elementary school. The Sears catalog stopped featuring dresses for boys in 1940. The father was typically absent and had no role in child rearing. With only a female role model boys became very much feminine and compliant. They lived in an exclusively female world. Then when they were in school, they had to learn how to be a boy and often over reacted by getting too aggressive towards females. Reference: "Cultural Anthropology" 9th ed. by Haviland P 143 and "Women in a Sexist Society" by Nancy Chodorow P 193. I suspect that for boys like me with no father at home, this process was retarded even more. I was born in 1951. I recall having a female baby sitter who had no problem taking me into the women's locker room a the community pool where I changed into my swim suit along with the other women. I never had a male role model my entire childhood. Those fathers that I did know were cruel and beat their children, who were my fiends.. When I was told by my mother that I was going to be a man, I cried as I didn't want to become one of those monsters. I was interested in monster movies at the time and all I could relate to was them.

[Sejd]

Hi Maggie
It's like reading my own story. I thought for a while that my absent father was to blame, but it seems like we either have this different take on our sexuality or not. At least that's what my sexologist told me. But I think it would accelerate TS to grow up with only female influence as I did. I was also taken into the women's locker room by my mom while my dad went and changed by himself in the mens room at the swim bath. Weird to say the least. Years later he took me to the steam room at the pool, and I was in shock to see the old men naked. I also believed that when I grew up, I could choose to be a woman or a man. Turns out I was right! LOL:thumbsup:
hugs
Sejd

[helenr]

Hi, early childhood experiences are so profound. I believe that my mostly absent , distant acting, father surely didn't help me overcome my leaning towards the feminine. I was close to my mother, watched her put on girdles,etc and recall trying on my older sister's pink nylon briefs-that, curiously, she never cared for! She preferrred white cotton lollypops, or whatever the name was. I think I also gathered up discarded nylon hose and put them on too, as this young age-like 6-7. I so wonder about the in utero hormone influences--I wasn't born any hemaphodite but I believe feminizing estrogen must have had some role on my later behavior. Lots of boys play girl dress up for kicks, but some stick with it longer! I am a bit skeptical, to be honest, about any experiment with crossdressing boys --sounds like one of the many great fiction tales I have read. helen

[DianaGomez]

Thats interesting

[Stephanie Anne]

Great story. I would be interested in learning more.

I know for my liffe I didn't have one parent more influential thanthe other. That's not to say my parents didn't make lots of mistakes rasing me and my brother, just hat I didn't have a female centric upbringing. in fact I spent more time growing up with my grandfather and learning to be a grease monkey than anything. If anyting I was a tom boy - boy.

I guess I just always felt wrong as a boy and now a man. I remember my mom telling my stories of me as a little child having an imagninary friend that was a girl.

Funny all my cousins had imaginary friends as well, I guess it runs in the family. I was the only one that had an imaginary girlfriend it seems.

[Wendi {LI NY}]

WOW maggie-Kay,
you hit a nerve,I was raise by my grandmother in the early 50's. I went everywere with her ,locker room at the pool ,ladies bathroom etc.I also hated men, as my father was very abuse and took me from my mother to have his mother raise me. I still to this day have a low opinion of men. Maybe this is why I relate to femmeine needs? hugs,Wendi:love:

[wishonastar]

I was raised in California in the 50's. I had no father until my mother remarried. I did not see any of this.

In my grandfathers time they dressed boys in dresses because it was easier to potty train. Other than that I do not see dressing boys in dresses as anything but a " mental problem" with the mother!

[Maggie Kay]

If you read the post carefully, you will see that the dresses for boys was dropped in 1940 but the mindset of women towards their sons would not have changed by the early fifties. I was dressed in girls clothes as a baby in 1951. Not dresses but certainly girls clothes. I remember a pair of velveteen panties that my mother put on me as a toddler. A mental problem on the part of my mother, it could be but the reference I gave said that it happened widely. Obviously some here said that they did experience similar things.

[LilahCD]

Different world.. What a different society the late 40s/early 50s must have been. I almost envy Sejd and anyone else old enough to remember this period in American history.... Though the later adjustment in elementary school would be a definite trial which anyone younger could never understand.

Growing up, I was scolded, beaten and punished by grounding over feminine qualities and over fascination with girlie things in general, like makeup, dress, etc.. this is probably why I can never seem to say what I really mean here and just when I finally feel accepted, I bite the hand of anyone who shows understanding.. though that's being dealt with before too much damage is done. Hopefully.