Girl Friend Problem

[OlgaS]

I have a lot of close friends who are female, one who I have gotten very close to. I did fall in love with her but she is with someone else now. She has gotten very close to me and I think she knows I'm not your ordinary guy. I have tried to push her away as I think that I would lose her friendship if I told her.

I have not opened up to many people and she is the first one in a long time. I have given her enough chance to walk away but she keeps saying she wants to be apart of my life. I know if she gets any closer to me she has the ability to open me up which scares me. I want to keep her our friendship but I have never let anyone this close before.

All of my closest friends are female, and they all want me to be happy but I find it hard to find a female partner and then tell her I feel more sexy and turned on in her clothes than mine.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Olga

[Alice B]

The chance is rare, so let her in and let her know. She most likely already suspects and if the friendship is as close as you say it will not go away. No matter what. There are no gains without risk.:hugs:

[Emily Ann Brown]

Boy do I relate. Nothing ventured nothing gained sis.


Emily Ann

[Joanna-Louise]

The chance is rare, so let her in and let her know. She most likely already suspects and if the friendship is as close as you say it will not go away. No matter what. There are no gains without risk.:hugs:


Boy do I relate. Nothing ventured nothing gained sis.


Emily Ann

I agree totally, when i told kim who i was feeling inside i thought she was going to run a mile, Infact it was kim that introduced me not only to this site but rose's forum too as she felt she needed to research and talk to other people in my poisition to help understand more.

going with the flow here, but nothing ventured leads to nothing gained. I'm sure the friendship will be strong enough to take it, if not then the friendship probably was not as strong as it was (sorry to sound harsh there)

Hope it goes well for you, whatever you decide.

jo
xx

[DonnaT]

I have tried to push her away as I think that I would lose her friendship if I told her.


You've tried to push her away? Wouldn't you lose her friendship if you succeeded? Isn't that what you are trying to avoid?

So, you've a catch-22 situation. Push away, lose friendship. Tell her, lose friendship.

Except that, you can discipline yourself to not open up and tell her. You have a choice here. If you are really concerned.

But, if you want to establish something more than a friendship, tell her so she has a choice as well.

I do have another question though. Do these girls think you are gay? A lot of times girls think a guy is gay in situations like yours.

Ask your friend if this is what she thinks?

[Billijo49504]

Tell her!!!! If she is good with it, you might have a chance. But if she is'nt, would you really want to be with her, and have her find out several years from now???? It might be real messy ..... BJ

[Raychel]

Tell her. If there is true love there she will still want to be by yor side for the rest of your happy lives. If there is not then life will go on and you will eventually find someone else to be happy with. :2c:

[morgan51]

Tell her so you can live happily and openly no relationshipcan endure a lie. I had to tell my wife before we married so she could make a decision about my dressing and her aceptance. I was real scared at the time but all worked out well. I wish I could just be open and honest without fear but I'm not wired that way. Slowly I'm learning to trust my wife's love for me and tell her everything. It has been an on-going process. I love her so much and am developing a level of trust I didn't think I would ever have with anyone. Morgan:happy:

[TV Wannabe]

I think I would tell her, and talk about it with her. the worst that could happen is she doesn't want to go out with you.
Good Luck

[Jena11]

Take a chance and tell her, It may bring you closers as friends or maybe closers as more than friends, Then again it may not but at least you were honest. Jena

:2c:

[Nikki A.]

I've got a similar situation with someone I work with except that it is a friendship and I'm not looking for romance (she is married and I would never do anything to cause trouble).
That said what are the consequenses of teling her, will it affect your working relationship with her or with others if she reveals your secret. If unaccepting will she remain a friend and if accepting how might it change your relationship? If there are more positives than negatives tell her, if not, keep quiet. As for me, I'm still deciding on whether I should add her to my circle, although I think after the last two Halloweens she may have some inkling.

[Claudia Zylindrias]

Funny enough I agree with the general sentiment of everyone here. Tell her you never know when your going to hit the lotto, so to speak. I'm in the best relationship ever going on 4 years with kids to boot. 6 years before we me i made myself a promise to be completely honest with anyone that wanted to be close to me (friend or SO) in order to avoid the issue i had had with my first wife. This relationship is so great i may even marry again.

In short go for it tell her if you want to have a relationship with her, trust is earned never given.

[Suzie S.]

Olga, we only go around once in this crazy world! I agree with everyone here, be open and honest with her. If it is a sincere friendship, she will not run from you if you tell her. If it does blossom into something more than friendship, all the better! Sometimes true love happens when you least suspect it! :happy: I wish you the best! :hugs:

[TxKimberly]

Off topic, but the first thing I thought of when I read the title to your post was "Well Duh!"
The workds "Girl Friend" and "Problem" go hand in hand! :-)

[Angie G]

Check it out and see how open she is to CDing of she is good with it then tell her it may bring you closer good luck hun :hugs:
Angie

[femboy_01]

Hmmmm a toughie, but I would tell her and confide in her.

Serena

[Hali]

Hi Olgas i happen to be single and i know how it feels about chosing a partner that can understand our Cding.
Well i have an on-and-off girlfriend for five years...this girl is ultra feminine...that is, she doesnt like guys as per going out with them she always critisize men as beign unkept etc. one day i suspected her of cheatin on me with another guy...and suprisingly she comfessed to me that she only likes "girly guys" or many be "soft guys" that are "neat" and so on that she can never go out with a straight man that she is BI-sexual or atleast By-curious.
Yeah, from my own observation you can know if your girlfriend is "CD friendly" by:
1 she'll not be giving you hot rough sex only a soft and "girly sex"
2 she'll be utra feminine...e.g admiring girls more or complementing them more
3 extra submissive in bed
4 she'll always find guys wearing eye pencil and girly stuff a bit sweet

Hey and so many other things

...in fact i waz able to detect from early stages in our relationship that she might like CDs and after that scandal i confessed to her about ma CDing and she told me that its OK with for me to crossdress. Hey this girl may accept me at that moment to cover her "promisquety" but its very unlikely cos since that day things have seriously changed between us.

So look hard into her and keep on mensioning stuff about CDing and Bisex if you notice any excitement then try other methods to confirm. Bye

[Scotty]

I'm in the same boat, getting very close to a gal that I know will NEVER turn into anything (Kinda like it that way) but she trusts me. I need to know I can trust her and maybe I'll open up to her.

But that trust issue is a hard one - think about what that person does when they are angry - do they still keep quiet or do they blab about you to other people?

Gotta always think to the future...

[Glenda]

I have always had close friendships with women. They feel comfortable sharing their feelings with me. My buddies would rather I take their wives or girlfriends to a club rather than going themselves. I also spend a lot of time with my buddies doing guy stuff. It was like this for years. When I turned 45 I discovered my desire for crossdressing. Up to that age I didn't have a clue. Bottom line, now when I go with the girls for a girls night out I may be dressed as well. If you consider her a close friend then tell her. It may make your life a lot more fun.