ex wife trouble

[tina jayne]

hi its been a rough few days my ex wife ( bunny boiler for hell ) has decided to tell every one who i know and even got in contact with my company and told them of my cross dressing :sad:i did not know this untill my boss asked to speak to me then she told me i just said nothing but i was so mad and upset , to think that i have been split up from her for 10 years and because she did not get the house back ect she has done this how low can people get ,that has realy put me back on trusting people bye for now tina

[Lucy Bright]

Tina - that's really low! People do some pretty crazy things during break-ups, but ten years on she hasn't even got that excuse for her vindictiveness. But what about your boss? Did she call you in in a supportive way - i.e. because she thought you ought to know what your ex had been up to? Because I can't think of any other good reason.

Kisses and hugs, :hugs:

Lucy

[Brianna Lovely]

Although I think that was a mean thing for your ex to do, I feel that you should have been up front with your boss.

Being a TG person is nothing to be ashamed of. Saying, "Yes, I'm a crossdresser, so what?" may have eased your mind a bit.

I do hope you have another chance to be honest with your boss.

[Sandra]

I hope your boss was ok with you? It seems strange that after 10 years she should do this, but it was a very nasty and mean thing to do.

[Rachaelb64]

hi its been a rough few days my ex wife ( bunny boiler for hell ) has decided to tell every one who i know and even got in contact with my company and told them of my cross dressing :sad:i did not know this untill my boss asked to speak to me then she told me i just said nothing but i was so mad and upset , to think that i have been split up from her for 10 years and because she did not get the house back ect she has done this how low can people get ,that has realy put me back on trusting people bye for now tina


Ow! That hurt a lot! Your ex is not related to mine is she? Mine try the same stunt a fewe months back. She threated to tell everyone so I called her bluff and she backed down.

Look on the positive, things can go up from this point, the damage is done, close the door and move on and show her your the stronger person in all this.

Good luck :hugs:

[kim85]

that is nasty i cant believe she did that after 10 years. :hugs: good luck hun. And dontlet one person stop you trusting others. Just take it slow

[TxKimberly]

And the irony is, if she gets any kind of alimony from you, what she just did had the potential to impact your ability to provide it. Not well thought out on her part.

By the way, how did your boss take it? You OK on that front?

[SANDRA MICHELLE]

Wow maybe you have a legal case for a hate crime. I would certainly look into it and let her know that she should look out for her in-appropriate actions. Once it is out like this I feel your best approach is to handle it as a matter of fact thing and as if it should not be an issue for anyone unless it affects your ability to perform in the workplace. Good luck with the law suit!

[MarciManseau]

hi its been a rough few days my ex wife ( bunny boiler for hell ) has decided to tell every one who i know and even got in contact with my company and told them of my cross dressing :sad:i did not know this untill my boss asked to speak to me then she told me i just said nothing but i was so mad and upset , to think that i have been split up from her for 10 years and because she did not get the house back ect she has done this how low can people get ,that has realy put me back on trusting people bye for now tina

I'd just tell people she's a very disturbed person and vindictive, and then say nothing more.

Hugs :hugs:

[Shelly Preston]

I just hope your boss is sympathetic

Maybe she will say no more about it and just wanted to let you know how bad your Ex wife was

[marie354]

I'd just tell people she's a very disturbed person and vindictive, and then say nothing more.

Hugs :hugs:

I agree, The same thing happened with my second wife. I just told people that she was just mad that she lost me and was trying to get back at me by spreading nasty roumers. I'm not sure if anyone believed her or not. Some did, I'm sure, but others just ignored it.

[Karren H]

Well two can play this and since you have nothing to loose anymore... Call all of her friends and employeer and tell them she is really a he who had a sex change... hahaha

All's fair in Love, War and Crossdressing!!! hehehe

[jaina]

hi its been a rough few days my ex wife ( bunny boiler for hell ) has decided to tell every one who i know and even got in contact with my company and told them of my cross dressing :sad:i did not know this untill my boss asked to speak to me then she told me i just said nothing but i was so mad and upset , to think that i have been split up from her for 10 years and because she did not get the house back ect she has done this how low can people get ,that has realy put me back on trusting people bye for now tina

This is the price you pay for choosing to be in the closet. It allows people power over you.

[Niya W]

Although I think that was a mean thing for your ex to do, I feel that you should have been up front with your boss.

Being a TG person is nothing to be ashamed of. Saying, "Yes, I'm a crossdresser, so what?" may have eased your mind a bit.

I do hope you have another chance to be honest with your boss.

Why would she have to tell her nboss unless she plans to transitions ?? What you do on your own time is your own bushiness . Would you expect some to have to tell their boss they are gay ?? Its not a matter of being in the closest, but why should my boss know what i do off the clock

[Kimberley]

I am so so very sorry to hear this. Unfortunately it is a repeating story and there really is nothing any of us can do about it.

I hope you can come out of this okay. She sounds like she needs a therapist, not vengeance.

Hopefully it will backfire on her and at least some of those she has contacted will come to your defense with a simple "Who gives a damn."

I do disagree with informing your boss or anyone else you dont want to. It is your life and your business, not theirs. If you were using company time that is a different story.

:hugs:
Kimberley

[JenniferR771]

Karren's right. If anyone asks, just say it was her idea for you to dress all along. She married you because she likes crossdressers, right?

[Alice B]

It depends upon how far you want to push it, but if she is doing this 10 years after the divorce you may have grounds for a law suit. Maybe just threating her with it will shut her up. It is very sad that she is such a bitch.:hugs:

[Joanna-Louise]

I'm sorry to hear what your ex did hun, I hope you can start trusting in your friends soon to help you through this mind bending situation.

Jo
x

[Niya W]

If she waited ten years ,its not a law suit i'd running to the court house for . I'd talking about a restraining order. Getting a good lawyer to figure out what your options are. I mean how many people wait would even wait 5 years to get revenge. 10 years later harboring a grudge, thats a head case if i ever heard of one.

[Amy Hepker]

I am sorry to hear that Tina, My X wife did the same thing to me, but very few believed her, and others never said anything. What can you do except come clean and stop hiding it, just tell them the truth, but also tell them you are not Gay, but just a crossdresser.

[Sarah Rabbit]

10 yrs is nothing to a Vindictive EX (be it male or female) who seeks revenge for any injustice 'Real' or 'Perceived'. The thing now is how are you going to deal with it. Even if you deny it, mud sticks and there will be those who will believe. I would have been upfront with the boss, after all they can not kill ya, can they.

Sarah R. :bunny:

[Noel Chimes]

I have to agree with the legal road. It has been 10 years and she chooses now to bring up your personal habits. At least speak to an attorney if the situtation causes you any problems especially on your job. Hopefully your trust level will start to return, but it will never be the same.

[tiffanyanne_69]

That is so unfortunate . . . I'm so sorry.

I told my wife about 4 years ago and we've been through many times counting right when I told her until just the last few weeks that I thought we'd get a divorce (and it is NOT all or even mostly about tiff). She actually "outed me" partially to my parents, but after she did that (which was right after I told her 4 years ago) she apologized and has vowed that she would never tell anyone ever again unless I said it was OK. Also she said that she would never use that against me. Who knows what would happen though, but to be honest, now that I've actually fully accepted "Me", I don't care . . . sure, it would be traumatic, but it would actually be somewhat of a relief I think.

[Julie York]

Sorry to hear about that.

It's strange that people who do these vindictive things have no understanding of how they are seen by everyone else. They think they are getting one up when they are actually losing points.

No matter who she phoned etc, I think most folk would go slightly cross eyed and think. "Wow what a cow!" regardless of their feelings towards TG etc.

[trannie T]

As much as I think people should venture away from the closet this is not the way to come out. A lot of people are going to be looking a bit more closely at you for a while. Keep your chin up, be strong.

[Brianna Lovely]

Why would she have to tell her nboss unless she plans to transitions ?? What you do on your own time is your own bushiness . Would you expect some to have to tell their boss they are gay ?? Its not a matter of being in the closest, but why should my boss know what i do off the clock

I did not say she "had" to tell her boss, but it's a moot point, since the ex-wife already told the boss. Besides, I was under the impression that London had laws against gender discrimination.

An interesting question. I do believe in a person's right to privacy, but I wonder. If a co-worker told the boss, you are Gay, and you're not, or the boss thought you were Gay, and you're not, or you are Gay and you tell the boss, what's the difference if you're dismissed?

People routinly get fired, for what they do, off the clock.

[marny]

Sounds very bad. She is obviously still bitter and hasn't moved on. At least you aren't in Canada. A couple of years ago the lawmakers here decided that a former spouse who is unsatisfied with ther settlement could reapply, particularly when their former spouse has become more financially successful. The first wife didn't know. Actually I didn't either and hadn't started then but I have to keep under a different radar. Your Ex sounds vindictive but it usually comes down to money. You should get an intermediator. Good Luck! :2c:

[suzannecarr]

Why would she have to tell her nboss unless she plans to transitions ?? What you do on your own time is your own bushiness . Would you expect some to have to tell their boss they are gay ?? Its not a matter of being in the closest, but why should my boss know what i do off the clock

exactly! it seems that some people on this forum find something wrong with everything, who walks up to their boss for no apparent reason to say, "how was your hunting trip, how bout that football game the other night, btw, im a crossdresser, how does that grab ya?.suzanne

[sterling12]

Hmmm, "The Wrath of a Woman scorned?" I can't imagine any rational reason for doing this.

But please, share with us what you believe might have set her off? After 10 years to suddenly start playing "take no prisoners," seems odd. What was her justification for doing this?

Peace and Love, Joanie

[tina jayne]

she has just finished with her boy friend and she wanted to come back to the house because i said no thats when shit happoned thanks for your support:love: bye tina

[Kieroney]

It just shows why she's the ex, could be worse sister, you could be married still to that bi---, remember when people talk about you that's a compliment, its always feels great knowing how people want to make you no. 1 in there lives, considering most of them have families, which they are Ignoring talking about you. I love it when people talk about me,its means I'm the no. 1 thing in there little lives, and as long as they keep talking, I always will be. Just tell them you a cd so what, most of them wish they had the guts it takes to come to grips with issues in there lives, I've noticed around my work place that subject matters have gotten deeper,and people are always asking questions, everyone has skeletons in there closets, it just takes a leader to bring them out. Tell your x-wife thank you. She's just jealous that you look better than she does when your dressed up anyway, and wishs deep down she could still control you. Kieroney.:happy:

[UASIANGAL]

I won't offer any advice, good, bad, funny or stupid but the silver lining I see? Here's where you see who your real friends are - those that cares about you and accept you.

[Victoria Anne]

My dear I hope you are ok , how did things go with your boss ? I do understand and feel for you , my ex has destroyed my relationship with three of my kids and continues on to as she put it "destroy me", ther was no issue until I remarried , 7 years later it has been 17 years now and she is still at it . Good luck sweetie, and don't give in to her , it would only give her power over your life and emotions.

[claire angie]

hi well to be honest my ex is wanting to do the same and out me but so far she hasent, otherwise i would have heard about it from my two girls, as they would be the first so she could destroy my relantionship with them and everybody else around them. i do belive the day will come and it will be something i will have to over come.

so i hope you can move on and put it behind you, try not to show to her that you are hurt :love:

[jonnie64]

So sorry to hear! What a very low thing to do! They have a saying in the CIA:

Admit nothing, deny everything and make counter accusations!!

Good luck!!

[MarciManseau]

Well two can play this and since you have nothing to loose anymore... Call all of her friends and employeer and tell them she is really a he who had a sex change... hahaha

All's fair in Love, War and Crossdressing!!! hehehe

Love how you think!! :love:

[Michellebej]

Hon,

My ex did the same thing to me, except for my employer.

My Parents just flat did not believe her. One of my sisters is just kinda neutral about it, not sure if she believes or not, but; doesn't really care.
The other two sisters believe her, but; could care less. I was told that my youngest sisters answer was " Really? What size dress does she wear, now I know what to get her for Christmas".

This affected the kids the most. My oldest told me he doesn't care what people wear as long as they are good people.

My middle child is in complete denial, and is mad as heck at his mother for "lieing about Dad".

My youngest just refuses to listen to her, and acts as though nothing has changed.

Fortunately she has spent so much time as the vindictive ex that most people believe that this is just another chapter of "the sky is falling".

I feel your pain.

Just do as I do, play it off as the latest from the "Vengfull ex".

As that great Canadian Philosopher Red Green says " Hang in there, we're all pulling for you".

Michelle

[Sinthia]

My ex doesn't like me telling anyone that I crossdress, so I don't think I will ever have to worry that she will pull some shenanigans like that. But everyone that I have told do not have a problem with it, so she couldn't cause any damage anyway.