Dawn D.
11-26-2007, 01:23 PM
As a point of reference to help follow my saga:
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=71182
As I had stated in an earlier thread it was my intent (with the blessing of my Wife) that I would come out to my Mother this last weekend. I was agonizing about when the right time would be. Should I do it during Thanksgiving day? No, I thought , that would be a rather selfish endeavor to steal a family event and possibly ruin the day for all if it didn't work out well. So, I procrastinated on Friday and when Saturday morning came I was outside doing some chores when it hit me like a sledge hammer....DO IT NOW!
Mother only lives a few steps from my house so there wasn't enough time to consider chickening out on the way over. I knocked on the door, she soon answered and let me in. We exchanged our usual pleasantries and then she asked "Whats up?" As I am thinking 'OK, how do I start this?'. By the way, please bare in mind that my Mother is a very conservative thinking and feeling person. Subjects of this nature have never really been a topic of interest or concern in our family as I was growing up. After a rather long pause she asked "whats wrong?". I still hesitated to answer. Of course the lump in my throat had to be cleared (which was not easy). And again after a lengthy pause she asked "Is there something wrong at home?" I mustered up the nerve to answer, "No". I then said "I need to tell you something. There is something going on, however, it is not something that I am ashamed of and it is not something that is wrong". I could see the questioning in the look of her face grow by the second. It was painfully obvious that all kinds of thoughts were racing through her head. Once though, that I had started talking, it was like a flood that came from my mouth. I began by explaining what I was about to tell her was something that had been with me my entire life and that it was (I believed) something that I had been born with. At this point already I could see it coming, the look. I had seen it too many times as a young boy. That look of disbelief and that I was exaggerating a situation. Sometimes when I get that look from her I just walk out in frustration. But, not this time. This time I stayed and this time I made her wait to say anything before I had finished telling her about myself.
When I reached the actual point of telling her of my being Transgendered and that I like to crossdress and feel feminine, I saw a very odd look on her face and I knew at that point I had either, a) convinced her about this that easily (not likely) or, b) there was a sudden realization from her view. It turned out to be the latter. However, before she gave me her response, she gave another look to me. This one I rarely ever saw as a child. That look a Mother gives a child when they are expressing unconditional love. I just stood there and cried. Then she dropped a bombshell, "You never knew this, but, when you were a baby, I had to take trip with you to Texas and your father stayed home. Well, your Aunt (who lived next door) one day went to check on the house we lived in. Thinking your father was off to work, she was going to do some house cleaning for him. When she came in she discovered him sleeping in bed and he had my underwear on! She just quietly left and only told me about it once we returned home from that trip." Needless to say I was floored! I almost needed a jack to lift my jaw back into place.
Please understand, my real Father was a very mean man and my Mother divorced him after he had put a gun to her head. I was still a toddler when this happened and I never new him until much later. I also never had so much as an inkling of an idea that he crossdressed. This revelation has suddenly made me aware of a point of validation in all of this. To me, I am now believing that this 'gift' (crossdressing) is somehow genetic.That it can be passed along the same as how baldness runs in families or the similar features of your face with that of your Father or Mother! However, this is a topic for another thread, I think.
So, in the end of all of this, she told me that "No matter what, I was her son and would always be her son and that she loved me no matter how I look." She did say that she was "not ready to see Dawn, but that may change." I assured her that it is not my intent to push her into seeing Dawn and that she could take all the time she needed. I gave her the seemingly cliché' line about 'not losing a son but, gaining a daughter'. At this point we hugged (which we almost never do) and I went on about the chores I had originally set out to do. Later in the day I brought her some articles from the various sites about C/Ding and what it means for her review. She gladly accepted them.
This is truly an amazing time in my life. In the past month no less than three new people now know about the existence of Dawn! All three of given their acceptance of this situation without any adverse reaction or consequence. So, I just have to ask "Who's next on my list......hhhmmmm?"
Dawn
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=71182
As I had stated in an earlier thread it was my intent (with the blessing of my Wife) that I would come out to my Mother this last weekend. I was agonizing about when the right time would be. Should I do it during Thanksgiving day? No, I thought , that would be a rather selfish endeavor to steal a family event and possibly ruin the day for all if it didn't work out well. So, I procrastinated on Friday and when Saturday morning came I was outside doing some chores when it hit me like a sledge hammer....DO IT NOW!
Mother only lives a few steps from my house so there wasn't enough time to consider chickening out on the way over. I knocked on the door, she soon answered and let me in. We exchanged our usual pleasantries and then she asked "Whats up?" As I am thinking 'OK, how do I start this?'. By the way, please bare in mind that my Mother is a very conservative thinking and feeling person. Subjects of this nature have never really been a topic of interest or concern in our family as I was growing up. After a rather long pause she asked "whats wrong?". I still hesitated to answer. Of course the lump in my throat had to be cleared (which was not easy). And again after a lengthy pause she asked "Is there something wrong at home?" I mustered up the nerve to answer, "No". I then said "I need to tell you something. There is something going on, however, it is not something that I am ashamed of and it is not something that is wrong". I could see the questioning in the look of her face grow by the second. It was painfully obvious that all kinds of thoughts were racing through her head. Once though, that I had started talking, it was like a flood that came from my mouth. I began by explaining what I was about to tell her was something that had been with me my entire life and that it was (I believed) something that I had been born with. At this point already I could see it coming, the look. I had seen it too many times as a young boy. That look of disbelief and that I was exaggerating a situation. Sometimes when I get that look from her I just walk out in frustration. But, not this time. This time I stayed and this time I made her wait to say anything before I had finished telling her about myself.
When I reached the actual point of telling her of my being Transgendered and that I like to crossdress and feel feminine, I saw a very odd look on her face and I knew at that point I had either, a) convinced her about this that easily (not likely) or, b) there was a sudden realization from her view. It turned out to be the latter. However, before she gave me her response, she gave another look to me. This one I rarely ever saw as a child. That look a Mother gives a child when they are expressing unconditional love. I just stood there and cried. Then she dropped a bombshell, "You never knew this, but, when you were a baby, I had to take trip with you to Texas and your father stayed home. Well, your Aunt (who lived next door) one day went to check on the house we lived in. Thinking your father was off to work, she was going to do some house cleaning for him. When she came in she discovered him sleeping in bed and he had my underwear on! She just quietly left and only told me about it once we returned home from that trip." Needless to say I was floored! I almost needed a jack to lift my jaw back into place.
Please understand, my real Father was a very mean man and my Mother divorced him after he had put a gun to her head. I was still a toddler when this happened and I never new him until much later. I also never had so much as an inkling of an idea that he crossdressed. This revelation has suddenly made me aware of a point of validation in all of this. To me, I am now believing that this 'gift' (crossdressing) is somehow genetic.That it can be passed along the same as how baldness runs in families or the similar features of your face with that of your Father or Mother! However, this is a topic for another thread, I think.
So, in the end of all of this, she told me that "No matter what, I was her son and would always be her son and that she loved me no matter how I look." She did say that she was "not ready to see Dawn, but that may change." I assured her that it is not my intent to push her into seeing Dawn and that she could take all the time she needed. I gave her the seemingly cliché' line about 'not losing a son but, gaining a daughter'. At this point we hugged (which we almost never do) and I went on about the chores I had originally set out to do. Later in the day I brought her some articles from the various sites about C/Ding and what it means for her review. She gladly accepted them.
This is truly an amazing time in my life. In the past month no less than three new people now know about the existence of Dawn! All three of given their acceptance of this situation without any adverse reaction or consequence. So, I just have to ask "Who's next on my list......hhhmmmm?"
Dawn