Transitioned or Transitioning?

[Kimberley]

I posted this to my journal and as a reply to a posting on another site. It is NOT meant to be disrespectful or trolling. (Karen please feel free to remove it if you think it is too controversial) It is only a personal statement of where I am in all this; nothing more and nothing less.

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An epiphany? I don’t think so but certainly a recognition of where I am.

"I think transition is anything but a plan or goal. This is why so many "fail". It comes naturally as a product of life experience and at a point when "living the lie" is no longer feasible.

Having said that, I believe transition is a mental state, not a physical one. The physiological change is only the end of the path; the icing on the cake to use a tired descriptive.

I think if we truly examine some of us "in transition" it becomes quite obvious who has a goal and who is transitioned. Those with a goal are busy dealing with others and the effects on their environments or making major issues out of who stole the tissues. Those who are transitioned know themselves and their feelings and are not so much concerned with the physical as they are with just being themselves."

Looking at this and at my therapy it suddenly made sense. Things over the past few months have really turned for me. I think that because I wrote the above without any consideration, strictly off the cuff, it says a lot about myself and where I am today.

I will still not pursue SRS because of familial relationships that currently exist. But that really is a secondary issue isn’t it? It really matters how I feel, not look that counts. Looks are less important here. I AM ready, just unwilling. There is a difference.

:hugs:
Kimberley

[Sharon]

I agree that the most important part of transitioning is that which comes from within us -- our emotional self-acceptance. However, I also feel that an actual physical transition is also not to be downplayed. By doing so, you are proclaiming, not just to yourself but to the world, "this is me."

So, while I agree that your own mental acceptance is most important, I feel that the outward transition(even if no surgery is involved) is also important unless you feel you can truly live peacefully as your genetic self.

[Kimberley]

Thank you Sharon. The physical is absolutely important but comes as a result of finding the real person first; that person who can understand and live with themselves. If for some physiological reason I couldnt proceed I would be terribly disappointed of course but I could live with it and be satisfied in the knowledge of myself and that I can still live with true self expression as in an RLE situation.

As always, you are a sweetheart with a great point of view. thanks again.

:hugs:
Kimberley