leaving the house for the first time

[CAROLINE FROST]

i am writing this as a female all dressed in my finery. i was born a male with the heart and desire of a female, my wish from being eleven and putting on my first pair of knickers has always been to go out as a woman and be accepted as such.
The only thing is i am a male and terrified of being caught as a woman. my mother (whom i told when i was twenty about my passion for dressing as a women) told me men like to do this for sexual stimulation which i have to agree with initially but now i find that it isn't such a turn on but more a need. She also led me to believe that men like myself either ended up in court/prison or listed as a sexual devient, which with my current job i couldn't afford ( my governing body would terminate my license to work).
My other problem is that i am happily married to a wonderful woman whom i adore but doesn't know that i love dressing and behaving as a women when she is at work. I would love to be able to leave my house and socialise as a woman but fear that my secret wouldn't be accepted by anyone. so i write this as a princess tied to my tower with the whole world being my dragon ( tormentor) does anyone have any suggestions for me as to how i can leave my prison and gaoler and escape into what i know is really a wonderful world.

[Dita_B]

We all go through this stage sooner or later, Caroline. At some point you'll have to bite the bullet and come out to your family, if not you'll risk the family will catch up with you one of these days...

I had a very non accepting wife, who is now turning around as she respects my right to be who I really am and to express myself as such. It was not an easy route and it still isn't easy as she still has a hard time with it. But now at least I can come and go from the house as Dita and that is an enormous relief.

So if you want to liberate yourself from your imaginary prison, you've got to find a way to come out to your loved ones...

There are lots of threads about the subject on this forum, just do a search and read how others did it before you...

:love:Dita.

[StacyCD]

My wife was 'shocked' when I told her about crossdressing. She has kind of accepted a don't ask don't tell policy which has worked (ok) for the past year. However, I want more but I don't want to push too hard. If you are like most CDs it will not go away so sooner or later you will have to have the 'talk' with your wife. Good luck!

[paulaN]

The way to break free of those chains is to have [the talk] with your wife.

[shirley1]

i fully empathise with you although my difference is i'm single so it should be easier but it isnt apart from theres less likelyhood of my relatives finding out - i think this must be the most difficult thing for any guy to do walkiing out their own front door knowing everyone in the neighbourhood could and if you do it often enough will see you - i did it once in broad daylight as i say i still havnt come out to people i know it was a mistake the way i did it drunk i had seen 2 guys walking down road dressed as women but to this day i dont know if they were trannies or just guys having a laugh but it hit a nerve with me that day and i decided i was going to do it - good luck to you but for gods sake dont do it under the infuence of alchohol - the paranioa i suffered after my escapade was increadable i obviously wasnt ready to do it and ended up giving my home up caus i didnt feel comfortable where i was living i think you have to really do have to try an come to a stage where you really dont care about what people think or say otherwise you will be stuck in your home not wantin to out again - best of luck !

[mike47]

Caroline,
I don't really know what to say actually. I am a single man with kids/grandkids. My son knows but not my daughter. He took well but stated that she would not take it so well. I would have to agree with that. The best of luck that is for sure. It is great to go out and have few drinks while dressed. I will admit to that.

[trannie T]

I know that it is no comfort for you for someone to tell you that your prison is your own creation and you are the gaoler with the key. Let yourself out of the cell have 'the talk' with your wife.
Good luck to you.

[Marvina Martian]

I too would have to say that you should speak with her about it. If not anything but to put your own mind at ease. It is very hard to happily live with yourself whey you harbor such a huge secret for years.

Telling her is the hard part. I told my wife years ago when we were first dating. We dressed up for Halloween and of course I went as a girl. After the party I told her that I felt really good and comfortable in the clothes. We talked over the next few days and it evolved into a don't ask, don't tell kind of thing.

Recently, after over 13 years of marriage I have again brought the subject into the limelight and have talked about dressing more, just because I want to. She is beginning to accept it more and more as she knows me so well and only wants what will make me happy.

This weekend we spent a "girls weekend" together and had a great time!

So there you go, a positive story about telling your wife!