Possessed?

[Taylor105]

Man oh man. In coming completely out I had/have a Shelly myspace page that I wll be getting rid of on Friday. Now that even my nieces and nephews know I don't need to keep that page up to keep an eye on them anymore. They are now on my real myspage page now.

There were still some friends on my Shelly myspace page that didn't know. So what I decided is that I would go ahead and send a message to the ones that I really liked and was hoping to keep them as friends and just have them go over to my Taylor page.

I don't know how many of you guys have a myspace page or not but if you have a page and you have had it a really long time you start to build up a pretty sizeable group of "friends" on there. In my case I don't know how I managed to do it but I had almost 100 people on my Shelly page. I have/had a relationship with every single one of those people as far as talking back and forth. I didn't make a mass bulletin to shout it out to everyone on my friends list. I sent individual messages to the ones who I thought would be accepting and really hoped to remain friends with so I was hoping that they would switch over to my REAL myspace page.


The mass of people that I chose to write to either popped right over to my Taylor page and said they were supportive or acted like it was no big deal (which is exactly what I like). Then there are the people who read your message and just choose to ignore it completely. You know how you can look at your sent messages to see if it's read? So anyway, there are people like that. They've decided they don't want to be in your life anymore but they don't want to be rude so they say nothing.



There is this one lady who I have been talking to about a year now. She was one of my very first myspace friends. We are both martial artists so that was what connected us. I have talked to her at least three or four times a week for a very long time. I was pretty sure it was going to be no huge thing with her. I really like her and I know she likes me. We were just good buddies online. So I was shocked and simply could not believe it when I got her response to my message. She said that she didn't believe there was any such thing as my being a boy trapped in a girl's body. And that it wasn't of God. That it isn't possible and that I was possessed by a demon.

Hmmmm.....okay I kinda felt upset about this but then I was just like..whatever! If this lady thinks this about me there was probably no real friendship to begin with. I only wish I had known that it would turn out like this a year ago. I wouldn't have wasted my time on her.

This message that I got from this lady got me to thinking about you guys. I was wondering if you all have had anything like that said to you at one point or another? What is the very worst thing you have ever been told in coming out? Just curious. I don't want to think I am the only one.

[xTwo_Of_Heartsx]

my mom thinks that my trans-ness is because I am posessed by Demons.
she used to beat the crap out of me when I was a kid, and scream things like "in the name of jesus christ, get the f.uck out of my daughter!"

=/

[Bethany_Anne_Fae]

Hope you dont mind if I respond here...

I have recieved that comment many times over the years. The difference for me is that I am a "willing" participant.
Growing up, my sister and I always believed we were in each others bodies. As twins grow there are connections that simply cannot be broken or explained. Believe me, I've tried to figure it all out on my own through much research, but there is nothing out there that can explain the what I call the bottom line.
When she died, the rest of her finished the journey over to me. I'm sorta complete and a half so to speak lol.
Crazy??

Probably, but I AM very happy these days ;)

*hugs*

Zara

[Kate Simmons]

Yeah, I've been accused of that once or twice but quite honestly I've found out that the "demons", discarnate spirits (or whatever they are) are leary of me because they know who I really am. In any case, I'm no respecter of persons or spirits and call a spade a spade and very few challenge me. Anyone who says this of someone else is just a case of ignorance as usual because their thinking and tolerance is limited and they cannot simply accept folks for who they are.:rolleyes:

[Emily Ann Brown]

EX is sure I'm possessed by demons...GIGGLE GIGGLE.


Emily Ann

[Felix]

Don't know what my ex really thinks. She did used to call me a freak but said she was only joking now i am not sure what she really thinks. Oh well her loss!!! xx Felix :hugs:

[aethen]

It's been my experience that people who think in these terms-- that the devil and demons are active in the world in that kind of a physical level--simply don't process the world the way other people do. Logical argument is wasted on them not because they're stupid or stubborn, but because their brain is not processing what you're saying the way your brain is processing it.

The best analogy I can think of is trying to run a Mac program on a Windows PC. There's nothing wrong with the Mac file, nor is there necessarily anything wrong with the Windows PC (though, analogy aside, there's usually something wrong with Windows :D ) But the data gets looked at and the Windows PC simply does not process it.

That in and of itself doesn't make them a bad person. The real test is how they treat you from here on in. If you tell the person that you don't believe they're right, and that you don't want to be lectured about it, can they accept that? If so, maybe the friendship can continue to exist on some level.

As an agnostic myself, I do try to remember that not everyone who takes that kind of view of the world is trying to make me feel bad. Sometimes they honestly do care, and honestly do want to help. If their idea of help is screaming about Hellfire and brimstone, I probably don't want to talk to them, but I do have friends who are worried that being gay is going to affect my immortal soul. They also know that I know they're worried about it, but if that comes to dominate our relationship, I'm just not going to talk to them any more.

My several cents,

~Mark

[ZenFrost]

I've always been of the belief that it's wrong to push your religion/beliefs on another person. And that includes saying someone is possessed if they don't fit in the normal standards of society. So in my opinion, it's just plain wrong to accuse a transperson of being possessed, it's just the whole concept of fearing what they don't understand without putting any effort into trying to not be so ignorant.

[aethen]

I had a bit of a rebuttal written to the previous post, but I'm removing it because I don't want to lose sight of Taylor's initial problem.

Instead, I'll say this: when I came out to a friend of mine for several years, I had already guessed she would have problems with me being gay. She did, and she told me so. I responded that I didn't agree with her and while I appreciated her genuine concern for my moral welfare, I made it clear that I did not want to hear about it (though the conversation wasn't quite as eloquent as I make it sound). She's never mentioned it since. I have no idea if she still thinks I'm going to hell or not.

We don't talk as often as we used to, but that's much more a product of changes she made in her own life than anything else. When she is online, we talk. She's actually inspired me a few times in my life, in ways that had nothing to do with religion, and that's something I would have lost if I had just written her off after her first reaction. We were both willing to overlook our differences in opinion about homosexuality--that took both of us.

So Taylor, my point is that your friend might not be willing or able to overlook your "possession", and if that's the case, it's truly a shame. But I suggest giving her a chance if you haven't yet. Maybe in time she'll learn that what you're going through isn't what she thought.

A few more cents,

~Mark

[Cai]

I'm not sure Zen is saying that people shouldn't express their religious beliefs, just that they shouldn't push those beliefs on others.

But there is a line where expressing their belief is pushing their belief on others, in a case like this where someone believes a TG person to be possessed, and says so.

That brings up a whole other question, too: is it appropriate to maintain a religious belief that causes you to have a negative view of others? And if we ask a religious person to let of negative and judgemental viewpoints, are we asking them to give up their beliefs?

(I'm not saying that all religious people are judgemental, of course - I consider myself to be a strong Christian. Just some people.)

[ZenFrost]

I'm not sure Zen is saying that people shouldn't express their religious beliefs, just that they shouldn't push those beliefs on others.

But there is a line where expressing their belief is pushing their belief on others, in a case like this where someone believes a TG person to be possessed, and says so.

That brings up a whole other question, too: is it appropriate to maintain a religious belief that causes you to have a negative view of others? And if we ask a religious person to let of negative and judgemental viewpoints, are we asking them to give up their beliefs?

(I'm not saying that all religious people are judgemental, of course - I consider myself to be a strong Christian. Just some people.)

Yes, I didn't say expressing you beliefs is wrong, just pushing them on others. Taking what Domi said as an example, that isn't just 'expressing' beliefs. That's pushing them, and it's just plain wrong what his mother did.

But calling someone possessed... in today's society we tend to think lightly of that, it's used more as a joke these days. But think about what it really means. Demons are supposed to be horrible, cruel, truly evil creatures. If she honestly thinks you're possessed, that's equating your transness to something truly evil. That doesn't sit right with me.

But I digress, you wanted to know if any of us had had a similar experience? I've been called a lot of bad things for just being different. People have told me that I'm 'not right,' 'going to hell,' 'going against God,' and other similar things. I tend to eliminate any friendship with them if they don't cut it out right away because I just don't want to hear it.

[hayden von beethoven]

My ex-girlfriend's (Deana) mother used to tell her that I was nothing but a life-ruining lesbian out to steal her away from God, I was a tool of the devil and I was after nothing but her baby. I wanted to cut her baby out of her and sacrifice him in the name of Satan and convert his soul to evil, because of some androgynous woman in the bible or some shit? No clue, I've never and plan to never read the bible. But yeah, that was her basis. I was a biblical evil doer, because of who I am.

And I prefer to be androgynous. I chose to say f.u to the gender deal. But, ya know, sometimes I am a boy. Sometimes boy is all I can say about myself.

But Mrs. Copas can shove one up real nice and tight for all I care. I was (Deana has tried to admit this) the best thing Deana could've done for herself and her son.

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut shit happens right? -sips coffee-

[obsessedwithpantyhose]

the black and white edges of what "people" consider "normal" r getting realy fuzzy and for the most part they just dont know how to wrap their tiny little pea sized brains around it all so they just lash out and dont think twice about how it hurts the other person,,,
quoting the bible has been the biggest and most miss used crutch on the planet,,,,:2c:

Jesus needs to make a comeback and open up a HUGE can of whoopazz:D

[DanielMacBride]

I have had both my grandmothers turn on me (before I came out as trans, they still don't know yet and this is why) when I came out as lesbian and when they found out I'm Pagan - they both within a week of each other wrote me letters stating that they wanted NOTHING to do with me because I was evil and Satanic and possessed and blah blah blah.

I have also faced the argument from Christians that "God doesn't make mistakes like that" countless times, and found the perfect comeback for it on a mailing list I am on recently:

(Quoted from a post on TransFamilyofCleveland mailing list):

"God doesn't make mistakes. He makes all kinds of intersex babies,
blue babies, spina bifida babies, hare lip babies for a purpose. The
Christ said it in his second commandment: Love your neighbor as
yourself. Most call it unconditional love.

So, this is why God made me transsexual. So you and others can
love me unconditionally as I rise to God's challenge."

Even though I am absolutely NOT a Christian in the accepted sense (I refuse to follow what most people deem to be "Christianity", but have read the Bible, own several different translations thereof and have the utmost respect for the teachings of Christ the man, although I myself am a Pagan/Witch with strong Druidic ties), I really like the reminder in the above statement that being a TRUE Christian (and just plain being a decent human being in my book) is about unconditionally loving all other beings (human and animal).

That was the core of what Jesus taught - "love your neighbor as yourself" means to treat others as you would be treated, and to love everyone unconditionally and without fear/judgement/expectations. Sounds pretty much like the gist of everything Christ preached, to me! :)

I suspect that there are more than a few "Christians" who would do well to be reminded of that....

Daniel

[Syr_SwitchyGQ]

That was the core of what Jesus taught - "love your neighbor as yourself" means to treat others as you would be treated, and to love everyone unconditionally and without fear/judgement/expectations. Sounds pretty much like the gist of everything Christ preached, to me! :)

:clap: Well said, Daniel... I'm not sure how Christian I am anymore, but the Christianity I do believe in is exactly what you said. :happy:


I suspect that there are more than a few "Christians" who would do well to be reminded of that....

:dry: You mean like the idiots in my hometown who protested when our city decided to create a memorial for a gay man who was killed in a hate crime? Then again, these are the same idiots decided that one of our highways was "sacred" according to the book of Revelation...:rolleyes:

[Taylor105]

Well, good news. After having deleted her from my myspace she friend requested me again! lol I said why are you wanting to be on my friends list after having told me you think I am possessed? She said she wished she could take back what she said and that she wanted to hear my life story and how I came to be in the position I am at in my life before she judged me. And it was all good from there. She loves me. She has left some cool comments under my pics and said things like How hot I looked and stuff like that. lol She loved "Shelly but she loves "Taylor" too knowing I am one in the same. So I guess my charm won after all. lol

[CaptLex]

So I guess my charm won after all. lol
I have no doubt. :koc: I'm glad she came to her senses - she'd definitely be missing out if she lost you as her friend. :hugs:

[Taylor105]

I have no doubt. :koc: I'm glad she came to her senses - she'd definitely be missing out if she lost you as her friend. :hugs:

That was very nice to say. Thanks so much!