Going out first time

[tiffanythecd2001]

:happy:Hi, okay your walking down the street, first time, how do you handel all the bad name calling,Tiffany

[kassandra richard]

I'm fortunate that in all the times I've been out, nobody has made any comments about me within earshot. So I guess I've been able to filter them out and ignore them. Not sure I'd care though because most often the rude comments are equally unattractive people (however you wish to interpret that).

Kassandra

[joann07]

It never happened to me my first time, thank goodness, and of all the times I've been out up to this day.
However, the best thing to do is be confident in yourself, don't panic, and ignore it.
They expect you to react and be embarrassed, but don't give them the satisfaction.
Just go about your business and act busy.
Soon, whoever it is will realize that they're talking to nobody, but themselves.

One thing that definitely comes in handy is the cell phone.
If you feel like you're being heckled, just act like you're talking to someone even though you're not.
I've done this a few times, in male and in femme, when solicitors try to come up to me and they just go away when they see me talking or texting on my cell phone.

Anyway, as I said before, just be confident and don't let things get to you.
Act natural and whoever it is will be the one embarrassed because they're just talking to nobody while others around him or her will be wondering why this person is just talking to themself. :haha: :loser:

That's my :2c:

Hugs!

[Sandra]

First time it happened when I went out with my SO we just carried on walking and ignored them, even though I wanted to go punch the hell out of them :Angry3:

We have found that when they realise you're not to going to answer back or be intimidated by them they give up.

[MAJESTYK]

If it happens ignore it, be yourself and be confident! Apparently stupid people were granted the gift of speach also even though they dont often know how to use it.

[MJ]

If it happens ignore it, be yourself and be confident , ignore the name calling hold your head up high and keep walking do not do anything !!! try to get out of there sight Neanderthals forget very quickly stay in a public place until you feel safe to get to your car or bus i live in the heart of downtown red neck central and being full time i get the looks but hardly any verbal abuse in fact only once this year in April so you look better than i do .. i think my big ears give me away :heehee: "see avatar"

[CrossKimmy]

you just rignore it and walk like you own that street as if it were your runway!

P.S. that is the cutest dress I have ever seen

it looks great on you.

[tiffanythecd2001]

:happy:Hi; okay thanks for kind words, and thanks for kind remarks on dress, that dress only sent me back a whole $1.59, i really like it.Tiffany.:heehee:

[JoAnnDallas]

So far, I have not had any problems going out dressed. I dress to blend in and so far no problems. So I'll keep my fingures crossed, throw salt over my shoulder, stay away from ladderes and black cats, watch out for cracks on the sidewalk and I should be OK.

[Mirani]

I have had
"Your balls are showing"
"TRANNIE, TRANNIE, TRANNIE"
"GEEZER"
pointing and laughing .....

BUT I have been "out" many times and been treated with dignity and respect manytimes.

I NEVER dignify a lout with any response at all. No eye contact, no remarks, no reward for the idiot!

Hold your head high and go for it girl .. you will get stronger each time.

[Eugenie]

:happy:Hi, okay your walking down the street, first time, how do you handel all the bad name calling,Tiffany

Well, I was probably lucky, but I didn't get "bad name calling" on my first going out times...

My only bad experience came much later when I was far more experienced. One woman and her friend "read me" and one of them tried to refrain from laughing... But It wasn't that bad... The other one reacted quite nicely though...

I don't know if it was because I was a x-dresser or because I had dressed in a way that was very poorly adapted...

:hugs:
Eugenie

[StacyCD]

Since I hardly convince anyone other than I am a guy in a dress, I try hard to at least be a tastefully well dressed guy in a dress. I've had snickers and laughs from people before but as I've become more confident the comments have become somewhat fewer and farther in between. I also seem to hear fewer comments and most just leave me alone--but it's not because I am very 'passable.' Since I very much enjoy what I'm doing I just ignore the occasional lout!

[SweetCaroline]

Ignore it and hold your head high knowing you are doing something most people will never dream of doing, FULFILLING A DREAM.

The bad name calling comes from people who want to stop you, because they cannot deal with the beauty of reality, or that some people, like us, are courageous enough to deal with it.

Just be sure to know the reality of your surroundings before hand. Know where the safe points are, and where the authorities are located (they are there to protect your rights). If you can, find GG friends or fellow sisters to accompany you.

Good luck and good spirits!:D

[Sally24]

A Big :D works for me!! You'd be surprised that sometimes it turns people around if they know you are enjoying yourself anyway. If not, it takes the fun out of it for them!

[shirley1]

I have had
"Your balls are showing"
"TRANNIE, TRANNIE, TRANNIE"
"GEEZER"
pointing and laughing .....

BUT I have been "out" many times and been treated with dignity and respect manytimes.

I NEVER dignify a lout with any response at all. No eye contact, no remarks, no reward for the idiot!

Hold your head high and go for it girl .. you will get stronger each time.

you look convincing to me in your photo i think i look convincing when i dress up but maybe not enough to go out - if when i hopefully go to a tg nite meeting and they were to tell me i look good does that necessarily mean you look convincing ? i guess the only way you find out is to do it for real but its scary isnt it ! theres a woman who works at my place who is a genetically felmale but she looks like a bloke - its the joke of the office a **** ina frock i dont find it funny at all caus i just think what would they call me if they knew - nevermind maybe i'll just go out with others like a call from last nite a face in a crowd i will notice !

[Dawn Marie]

I must be one to the lucky ones because everytime I've been out all I got was complements. If someone did make a snide remarke I never herd it, or I just ignored them, for I am happy in my own femme world.

[Nicole Erin]

I'm fortunate that in all the times I've been out, nobody has made any comments about me within earshot. So I guess I've been able to filter them out and ignore them. Not sure I'd care though because most often the rude comments are equally unattractive people (however you wish to interpret that). That means it is usually idiots and low lives who make fun of others.
Kassandra

Kassandra is a really pretty lady in her photos. However, something about those arms and hands look like they could be dangerous and fast. I wouldn't want to smart off to her either :eek:

Now my thing - The times I have been out during the day en femme, I have not really had any smart remarks, but I am also careful where I go.

If I catch someone making remarks, I kinda have a habit of cussing them out. It scares some people cause they weren't expecting a reaction. People often think we will try to ignore them so when someone talks back to them, it freaks them out. Even in my day to day life people can tell I am CD when I am in male mode. Stand up to a bully once and they quit harassing.

[Staci G]

I was shopping one tme at Simply Fashions in Charlotte NC the SA was great she brought me everthing in the store to try on even an out fit that matched hers that day. anywho there were a few other ladies in the store and 2 young girls freaked out and started saying in a loud voice I might add "thats a guy in that dressing room trying on dresses" I was so humiliated but it did not slow me down. and the SA helping me told them to either leave or stop making a scene they left and the SA was happy too she said her best customers were crossdressers.

[JoAnnDallas]

The only time I had any bad comments was at HEF2006. Another Cder and I went to the bar to buy some beer. This male customer loudly started making remarks about the convention and the people attending. The lady bargtender went over to him and loudly told him to shutup or leave. He left in a huff. She appoligied to us and gave us our beers for free. We thanked her and aftr we left the bar, we had a good laugh. The hotel bent over backwards for us and 99% of the other guest acted like nothing was going on. BTW that was my first public outing.

[kassandra richard]

Kassandra is a really pretty lady in her photos. However, something about those arms and hands look like they could be dangerous and fast. I wouldn't want to smart off to her either :eek:

That's right! I know karate and a few other Japanese words, and have occasionally been known to utter threats in an obscure dialect of Geek (not a spelling mistake).

Truth be known, I'm actually rather shy (like a certain red-headed vixen here) and pretty much a softy. My arms got this way from picking up my kids and tickling them to death :) Oh, and from fending off my wife when she's more.... um, nevermind :happy:

Anyway Mademoiselle Erin, adieu and merci for the compliments.

:hugs:
Kassandra

[Butterfly Bill]

If someone yells "faggot" or something like that, I just walk on and ignore it. If someone says "nice dress" or something else in a sarcastic manner, I say "thank you" and likewise move on. I don't respond if they try to call me back.

[KimberlyS]

Tiffany, just like the others have said, I have received little to my face or ears other than many surprised looks, but the smiles and grins make up for that. I am sure there are comments out of my ear shot or staring behind my back. I just keep going about my business. Confidence and self acceptance are key as IMHO it rubs off on others.

[Mitch23]

I'm lucky in that I've had very little negative behaviour. a few wolf whistles, some surprised glances, sniggers etc - not even from groups of teenage boys or girls. I just act confident and smile. The holding the mobile is a good idea and i've used it a few times myself. I've walked through hundreds of shoppers on a busy day in town and not been conscious of anything at all

Mitch

[Melinda G]

I've never had a problem.

[shirley1]

as someone who hasnt yet gone out it must be very important to get it right ie look as convincing as you possibly can - the better you look the less likelyhood of attracting too much attention - meeting others and going out with them sounds like the best idea for me that way at least you are not on your own and can get some idea of how well you look to pass - i would imagine once youve been out a few times and had no bad experience ie no hastle name calling ect you would not be so bothered if it did happen sometime - but cetainly for me to go out the first time on my own and get negative reactions from people i think it would put me right off ever venturing out again - so i would need help and advice on how good i look before taking the plunge !

[PeggySue]

I have had some stares, but no comments. I hav been out since the end of Sept. and have had five men honk their horns at me, usually when I'm driving. That is one of the best ways to go out and not be up close and personal with people. However, wearing sunglasses coul help too. In any case, I try to look as femme as possible and often I'm ignored. I just try to walk tall and move on when someone is looking questioningly at me. If anythin is ever said, I will no doubt ignor them and move outthe door.

[Nicki B]

"All the bad name calling"?? :confused:

It's really not all that common honey.. If it happens, act like any other girl who gets a rude comment - either ignore it, haughtily, or be sarcastic back (blowing them a kiss often works, too.. ;))