Here We Go Again

[Michelle PJ]

With much anticipation, I was on the verge of making an appointment for chest, stomach and bikini waxing. Why? Because shaving sucks. The results of shaving are OK immediately when finished, but a day and more later; watch out! I develop terrible razor burn, ingrown hair and such pain I can barely sit down.

As such, this time around, I figured I'd try waxing. However, in order to be considerate to my wife, I informed her of my desire. Unfortunately, she was having none of it. So, rather than have a big fight, I went ahead and shaved. Once again I'm paying the price.

What's been your experience with shaving and getting "permission" to maybe try something more effective.

Happy New Year!

Michelle PJ

[SandyR]

Hi Michelle!

I shave my legs everyday, even this morning I got some red bumps, not bad, but still. If you keep it up everyday it does get better, the skin gets use to it. As for me, I opted for laser hair removal on my chest and back. The back is doing great, but my chest is still getting some in-growns. Its getting way better, no doubt and the hair is really gone...love it. Its worth the cost. Lucky for me my wife supports it, in-fact she is doing her legs.

Hugs!

SandyR

[eden_medea]

With much anticipation, I was on the verge of making an appointment for chest, stomach and bikini waxing. Why? Because shaving sucks. The results of shaving are OK immediately when finished, but a day and more later; watch out! I develop terrible razor burn, ingrown hair and such pain I can barely sit down.

As such, this time around, I figured I'd try waxing. However, in order to be considerate to my wife, I informed her of my desire. Unfortunately, she was having none of it. So, rather than have a big fight, I went ahead and shaved. Once again I'm paying the price.

What's been your experience with shaving and getting "permission" to maybe try something more effective.

Happy New Year!

Michelle PJ

i have cancelled many a waxing appointment - mostly because of the relative expensiveness of it. shaving basically sucks, i have to do it every 3 to 5 days and it takes over an hour, just another burden... kind of like being a real woman and having to deal with things like menstruation ... except a lot more often. what is your wife's major objection - when i was living at home my mom was against my crossdressing very much so but she didn't mind if i shaved or waxed... waxing doesn't necessarily have to mean feminization, maybe that argument would work on the mrs.

[MarciManseau]

Does your wife ask for your permission when she goes for a wax or a perm? I'm really amazed at how some people just allow someone else to make decisions for them.

I truly don't mean to hurt anyone's feeling. I really don't understand is all.

If it's none of my business or I'm offending someone, please message me and I'll delete this.



Hugs, Marci :hugs:

[Michelle (Oz)]

I now use an epilator rather than wax. I don't shave other than as a touch up. I get red spots for 24 hours from epilating and in grown hairs as I used to do from waxing.

What I don't understand in your situation is why your wife would see a difference between waxing and shaving. I could understand if she was opposed to shaving as well because the appearance is changed. However, the appearance is the same for shaving and waxing at least for the first day or so.

Michelle (Oz)


Does your wife ask for your permission when she goes for a wax or a perm? I'm really amazed at how some people just allow someone else to make decisions for them.

Hugs, Marci :hugs:

Marci

No need from my point of view to delete your message but I understand the issue of keeping the SO comfortable with appearances. CDing seems to me to be a careful juggling act with one's SO made even harder by changing moods.

Michelle (Oz)

[jennifer41356]

Does your wife ask for your permission when she goes for a wax or a perm? I'm really amazed at how some people just allow someone else to make decisions for them.

I truly don't mean to hurt anyone's feeling. I really don't understand is all.

If it's none of my business or I'm offending someone, please message me and I'll delete this.



Hugs, Marci :hugs:

dont feel bad Marci, I often wonder the same thing, its your body , i would think one be able to shave what they wanted , just my :2c:

[Tamara Croft]

Does your wife ask for your permission when she goes for a wax or a perm? I'm really amazed at how some people just allow someone else to make decisions for them.

I truly don't mean to hurt anyone's feeling. I really don't understand is all.

If it's none of my business or I'm offending someone, please message me and I'll delete this.



Hugs, Marci :hugs:No offence taken and I actually agree... since when is it anyones business what they do with the hairs on their own body?? If my fella told me I couldn't shave my legs, I'd tell him to take a flying run and jump :shocked:

[Marvina Martian]

Hmmm, I have never needed to ask for permission to do anything.....Sure I usually do inform her of what I am up to (usually, but not always ;) ). Like when i made an appointment to get some laser done. I just told her when I was going and asked her if she would like to come along and have some done as well.
Just my view, although I am a bit headstrong on things that I want to do sometimes.....:bs:

[Kieroney]

Well, I have been shaving for eight years, bumps very seldom, ingrown hairs knock on wood few and far between, I pluck the center of my chest cavity, makes the chest shaving alot easier. Secret for me, dry skin, rubbing alcohol, and lubriderm, and of course a fresh mach fusion razor and soap. Shaving cream only used on face after I take a shower,chest shaving every four to five days, legs five to six, and arms seven to nine, and I use man nair that works in three minutes only on the arms, legs once in awhile if I wait almost two weeks. When I get out of shower I apply lubriderm on face arms and legs, behind. Ches:2c: ,rubbing alcohol, and the a little lubriderm. Tanning once in awhile also helps keep away the bumps. Tryed waxing, sucked broke out bad. Just remember soap first, and new high dollar razor. Oh yea, its my body, I do not need permission to do what I want with it.

[SiobhanW]

But that's what many of you miss when it comes to your CD'ing, and what a great many of the GGs complain about in the friends and family area.

I asked my wife's eldest the other day about how she felt about body hair and she said that she liked a man with body hair. So if she fell in love with a man, partly at least because he was this huge hairy beast of a thing, how would she feel if he said "Right, the hair's coming off" several years into their relationship?

Discuss everything with your partner and if she doesn't want you to make any changes to your appearance, then you should go with that request. My :2c:


However, in this case, where you're already shaving. I don't quite see what the objection would be.

[MJ]

With much anticipation, I was on the verge of making an appointment for chest, stomach and bikini waxing. Why? Because shaving sucks. The results of shaving are OK immediately when finished, but a day and more later; watch out! I develop terrible razor burn, ingrown hair and such pain I can barely sit down.

As such, this time around, I figured I'd try waxing.
However, in order to be considerate to my wife, I informed her of my desire. Unfortunately, she was having none of it. So, rather than have a big fight, I went ahead and shaved. Once again I'm paying the price.
What's been your experience with shaving and getting "permission" to maybe try something more effective.

Happy New Year!

Michelle PJ

i Don't understand... you shave already right? .... so what is the difference between shaving your body as opposed to waxing .. the end result is the same .. it's your money next time just go get waxed.. why tell her... if she is going to act like that then what she won't know won't hurt you ..IMHO

[Maggie Kay]

I recall, my SO being very upset at discovering my smooth shaved skin even though I was never very hairy. It was a mark of manhood that she didn't want to see go. In fact, she recoiled and pulled away from me when she first touched my skin and said "You feel like a woman!" She hasn't really touched me since and that was four years ago.
BTW, epilator is the best way for me. I do a full body "mowing" every two weeks, but I am on HRT so my hair grows slower in these areas now.

[obsessedwithpantyhose]

i been shavin my legs for yrs and my upper inner thighs still burn:mad:

i use the "intuition" shaver in the shower then apply cream rinse on my upper thighs to keep them moist, works great till the next day when the hairs start to grow back then i ITCH and burn like crazy,,MAKES ME NUTZ...

my x didnt want me to shave my legs but we seperated for a week (long story), and while i was at my moms i shaved them then we got back together and she said she liked how they felt, go figure

i keep my legs hairless better than my face

i HATE hair on my bod,, i want laser from below my eyebrows down to my toes,, leave the eyebrows and hair on my head,,,

[Daphne7]

I like when my hubby shaves his legs.... I don't remember how he first asked me about it. I think he talked about how in the past he had shaved them once and we just let the conversation roll from there. I have never been turned on by the 'big hairy guy' look. i'm not one for dudes with lots of chest and back hair.

Since you shave already her issue is probably about something else. Maybe she was concerned about how much it costs or if someone sees you (gasp, what will other people think). She may have a boundary issue with you going to a spa/salon.

I'm surprised about some of the other posts regarding money. "its your money just go do it" Money is a HUGE factor that really should be talked about. Its one thing if you each have an allowance- you can spend your allowance however you want. Or a situation of non-married partners that already split everything 50/50- then it is your money and go ahead. But i caution married people to be very careful when dealing with conflicts about how much money is spent on CDing. Some roads you go down you can never return from, don't pick a road you'll regret!

I suggest married people sit down and devise an allowance that each partner gets monthly. Then each can spend as they like without needing "permission". i guess the hairy line is that your wife gets to buy her self-care products out of the regular budget. It may take a little research to determine what amount of guy self-care comes from the regular budget (perhaps you can cut back on some guy things and use some of the money to get girl stuff) and then a lot of discussing to come to an agreement.

[Sapphire]

For some of us with very sparse body hair this is not a problem. But bear in mind that your partner may much prefer you with body hair than without it. The absence of normal body hair from a man is perhaps much more repelling to women than is generally admitted. While there will always be exceptions, the general rule seems to be that women do not like any competition with their femininity.

[Tamara Croft]

i Don't understand... you shave already right? .... so what is the difference between shaving your body as opposed to waxing .. the end result is the same .. it's your money next time just go get waxed.. why tell her... if she is going to act like that then what she won't know won't hurt you ..IMHOMaybe the SO likes to see him/her in pain after the shaving?? who knows.... But I agree, go get waxed... it's extremely painful mind you... lol... tell your SO that, she might agree then :heehee:

[insearchofme]

Painful? Please.... it just stings is all.

[Tamara Croft]

Painful? Please.... it just stings is all.How about I wax you and see how painful it is then :tongueout My mum said I was sadistic :cry:

:lol:

[paulaN]

I shave my legs and pits year around. My wife does not really like it. I have shaved my chest a couple of times in the past and my wife hated that. She likes my hairy chest even though it is not thick. And when I shave my chest I can not shave close enough to get rid of the stubble. So this fall I went to a salon and got my chest waxed. I loved that, I had no stubble, it was so smooth. However it did not last as long as I would have liked. And when it started to grow back it it did not seem to be pickie. So I had it done again at the same salon. Another 40 bucks gone. Now just today I bought a waxing kit at Right Aid. 10 bucks. I got the one that I thought was the best. And I did it myself this afternoon. I have to say I'm hooked on a smooth chest. I am saving 30 dollers every time I do it now. And I have enough lift over to do it again so I am saving even more. I am glad that I let someone else do it for me the first couple of times. And as for the wife.Well lets just say she has not said anything about it. I know she does not like it but she has not asked me to wear a shirt when we are intimate. Like she has when I have shaved. And as for me I am hooked on hairless, I love it clean and smooth, pits, legs, boys, and chest.

[teresa jeen]

i just shaved my underarms tonight for the first tim, is there anything i shoul know??

[Eugenie]

I alternate shaving and using depilatory cream.

I don't have so much the problem with in grown hair...

The problem with depilatory cream is that you need to have hair that are a minimum length... But that can turn to an advantage as it forces you to let your skin rest a while without shaving... But after using depilatory cream, one's skin is far smoother than shaving can achieve...

When shaving, I know that the effect is very temporary, sometimes, if I want to go out with friends, I have to shave twice in a day...

At first when my wife found out that I had shaves all my hair (which is naturally very abundant) she was very unhappy with me... Now she tolerates it...

:hugs:
Eugenie

[MsToriJones]

Eugenie,
I was actually going to suggest the use of creams. And if you only uses the cream the hair will soften over time. At least this has been my experience when I use Nair.

[Phyliss]

With much anticipation, I was on the verge of making an appointment for chest, stomach and bikini waxing. Why? Because shaving sucks.

As such, this time around, I figured I'd try waxing. However, in order to be considerate to my wife, I informed her of my desire. Unfortunately, she was having none of it. So, rather than have a big fight, I went ahead and shaved.

Michelle PJ

Comments have been made about "why get permission"? simple answer , respect.


Another comment has to do with "cost" ... agreed, money can be a factor, when balanced against the mortgage payment, ( wax or make the house payment???) [at least you'll look nice when you're evicted]


Seriously, I think there is a particular "boundry" that is being crossed. Shaving is a personal thing done by yourself, getting waxed by somebody else is, perhaps "over the mark" in that somebody else will be touching your body in areas that shouldn't be touched. Nothing intimate or sexual here but to get at particular parts "they have to be touched"

Now, I understand that getting a simple "haircut" the barber has to touch your head, but that is a publicly accepted thing. Having somebody remove hair in the bikini area is quite different.

I went from shaving my legs, (which "she" didn't like at first) to my bikini area. Really didn't enjoy the constant work to maintain the smooth feeling. Finally decided on the "wax thing" [which is NOT painful, just a mild stinging sensation for a very few seconds] . Didn't ASK permission but rather went ahead and did it. After 3 years I don't think she still realizes that I do this. Presumes I shave "really close" (I have a unique situation here, so don't even ask why she hasn't figured it out)

Again, my opinion, for what it's worth, is most likely a personal boundry/privacy thing.

[Michelle PJ]

I very much appreciate reading all the thoughtful feed back on my recent "hair care" issue. You guys (I mean girls) are great. I love it here at crossdresser.com.

Michelle PJ

[Pamela Julie]

Get the waxing. How is she going to know how the hair was removed. Get a small area done first, such as just the chest or stomach, to see how your body reacts to the waxing. You may also want to consider an epillator, as this is similar to using an electric shaver, except the hairs are pulled out instead if being cut off at the surface, waxing does the same thing. Plan on a few days to a week recovery after the first time waxing or epillating. It gets much better from that point on.

[katia]

Tried the epilator on my chest and arms ,but gave up due to the rash and the pain,just shaved my legs for the second time this week and it feels good( nylons feels great agains them ) so i will stick with shaving for a while before trying the epilator again.

[teresa jeen]

i just love the feel of smooth skin. especially when i crawl into clean sheets!! ohh sooo goood.

[charllote34]

Hi michelle , your not alone i sufer with all the pain you do re your hair removal, its been that bad i have had time off work with it .As you know its no joke !!Waxing is something i have tried on my chest and so far no probs xx