Dominant, Submissive or both?

[Annie D]

I would like to think that I am a liberated person and and in my lovemaking that my partner and I share equally in the experience but in my "too much testerone" years my "wham-bam-thank you mam" changed to helping her to be as satisfied or more satified than I was. In each of these encounters, I felt that I was in charge or the dominant participant not partner.

Now, as Annie, I want my wife to be in charge more and I want to more submissive. Is that my perception of being female. Is that the way that I perceived making love as a result of my growing up in the "War Baby era"?

Here is the $50 question: When you make love to your significant other, are you more dominant, more submissive or do you each take on equal roles and is this a perception that you have in your male sexual role?

Annie

[Raychel]

Pretty much equal roles here. But mostly I will take it any way I can get it. :devil::devil:

[DonnaT]

Equal roles. Not that I would mind her taking more agressive one once in a while ;)

[Kate Simmons]

I prefer equal myself. It's a team effort I figure.;):happy:

[Michelle-NC]

For the most part, while as Michelle, it is definetly submissive. There are times, when I am completely dominant, but very seldom as Michelle.

Of course,that is just our lifestyle, and we like the kinky stuff.

[Laura C]

Hi I'm very submissive in any role Just use me lol.

[Melissa A.]

I have always been submissive, regardless of what gender role I am in. But I could see myself being dominant if I was with a particularly submissive person, Especially as Melissa. But my preffered role is submissive. I don't think this has alot to do with "normal" male/female roles, as I am probably even more submissive as a guy.

Hugs,

Melissa:happy:

[Carol A]

Just wish I could we are both to old, but in our younger days my wife took charge and just LOVED to tie me up and have her way:p

[kaitlin]

Hi Girls, I will have to say we or I am all three. Most of our lovins is on an equal level no matter how I'm dressed, but we do swap up. We are very into bondage, and take turns as to who is the dom:dom:. I have to admit I would keep the role of sub if she wanted me too! :chained:Kaitlin

[rickie121x]

... the $50 question: When you make love to your significant other, are you more dominant, more submissive or do you each take on equal roles and is this a perception that you have in your male sexual role?
Annie I am seventy three now, and have some perspective on the role changing that has happened in my lifetime. There was the exciting ramp up as my social abilities allowed me to have more action - then the wonderfully long plateau of maturity - and this period, when any action I might be privileged to received is indeed a godsend! Crossdressing, tho I love it greatly, is less of a factor - much less, than the notions of dominance and submission.

For most of my Testosterone years, I believed that I was the Dominant. And I acted like that - at least in my love making anyway - taking responsibility for "her" pleasure. My pleasure? That somehow was never a question - I was just doing what I was "supposed to do", IE. creating the mood, providing the repertoire, and "doing" the action. All of that wasn't too bad, as that was what I believed most everyone expected. That was the "traditional male sexual role" in those old days. Well - as it was described in "Playboy" magazine, anyway. (Where else was I supposed to find out about sex?)

As I progressed through life, and enjoyed new female sexual partners, my perspective slowly changed with the result that "she" could become more active in the collaboration of allowing our pleasures to surface. Yes, things were better....

Ah, then it happened! Somewhere in my forties, I became brave enough to let my BDSM dominant self to become part of my relationships. I was very pleased to be the dominant at the parties we attended and in public... but was able to exchange roles and allow "her" to become dominant in our bedroom. This often resulted in an emergence of a new source of pleasure for my ladies - not all of them, but most. GG's seem to have a capability to switch roles quite easily, when given the opportunity and freedom to do so. :happy:And, there is absolutely nothing like partnering in the emergence those kinds of unbridled orgasmic happenings. It is one of life's great joys!

Of course my notions of Dominance and Submission are just a bit more strongly flavored than what most might enjoy, but then, what's a little whipping and bondage between friends?

Rickie

[tricia_uktv]

Hmmm, whats dominant?

[Priscilla Ann]

Way back when....I used to switch back and forth between being dominant and submissive.

[MsJanessa]

I would like to think that I am a liberated person and and in my lovemaking that my partner and I share equally in the experience but in my "too much testerone" years my "wham-bam-thank you mam" changed to helping her to be as satisfied or more satified than I was. In each of these encounters, I felt that I was in charge or the dominant participant not partner.

Now, as Annie, I want my wife to be in charge more and I want to more submissive. Is that my perception of being female. Is that the way that I perceived making love as a result of my growing up in the "War Baby era"?

Here is the $50 question: When you make love to your significant other, are you more dominant, more submissive or do you each take on equal roles and is this a perception that you have in your male sexual role?

Annie

in My male persona it is straight vanilla style---with some special techniques I like to do thrown in but no D/S or B/D. When I'm in femme, which is most of the time that I make love I'm completely Dominant---as a matter of fact unlike most CDs I equate being en femme with being Dominant

[docrobbysherry]

I guess I'm sort of like an old Harly. If a lady will kick start me, I'll take her where both of us want to go!
Never been concerned about what Sherry does or doesn't want. All I know is she's real good at the "kick starting" part!
RS

[Annie D]

Is taking charge of the love making a result of our age? I am 60 and grew up with macho leading men in the movies, lots of westerns (John Wayne, Gary Cooper, Steve McQueen, James Garner, et al) to be my male role models and of course Playboy magazines to provide my sexual role advice. I took the advice but wanted to look like the women in the pictures.

Today, our leading men are less macho and more metrosexual and I think that is going in the right direction in my being less dominant.

And YES! I like to be completely in bondage too!!

Annie D

[DKA]

Dominate Me Baby!!!!

[obsessedwithpantyhose]

i know for myself i always made sure she was "happy" by the time we were done,, i know, call me crazy:tongueout

[sissy_she_boy]

I am always the submissive passive bottom in all of my realtionships. I have never been the domme one in a realtionship before. Thank goodness there are men out there that prefer a girl to be passive and submissive!!

kisses
sissy dana

[Mitch23]

I like to let her take charge in the bedroom and to decide what we do and how we do it. she is a naturally dominant school ma'am. it helps us to balance our unequal sex drives - i am more active than she so she decides when to grant favours and when to withhold them. it makes me more attentive to her needs during the est of our lives as well

mitch

[Eugenie]

Well, as a matter of fact, I've been rather submissive for a vey long time, even when being in a relation as a male...

But submissive for me doesn't mean that I'm looking for being dominated or passive. For me, it means more being fully dedicated to the sexual pleasure of my partner. And in turn that is a source of great satisfaction for me, even if not a sexual one.

:hugs:
Eugenie

[angelfire]

As a man, I'm a switch. I like being dominant sometimes, and I like being submissive others. When dressed, always submissive.

[Annie D]

For those of you who are submissive, do you think that being feminine is being the non-aggressor? Are we stereotyping ourselves as "the little woman"? Personally, I must confess that that is part of what I am and how I want to be treated when enfemme.

Annie

[Marvina Martian]

I have always been the submissive one. I prefer the bottom and to let her have her fun. In fact, most of the time she has to jump me when she can just to get any ;)

I prefer to be led and unfortunately most of the time so does she.....

[JacquiUKTV]

...

But submissive for me doesn't mean that I'm looking for being dominated or passive. For me, it means more being fully dedicated to the sexual pleasure of my partner. And in turn that is a source of great satisfaction for me, even if not a sexual one.

:hugs:
Eugenie

I believe you've hit the nail on the head. I've never made love crossdressed and have no desire to do so, but the "femme" inclinations seem to make me more empathic to my SO's needs....or so I'm told.

[ubokvt]

I dislike the terms sub dom they color the experience to much. Besides any one who understands sub dom know its the sub who is in control. Have you ever tired giving up on out comes and just being in HER space and fallowing. Lettting go and just being content with what ever happens. Experiencing her in a differnt context.

[Jennifer Lynndon]

I'm definitely a switch when it involves romantic activities :heehee: ... but than again ... I really like it kinky! :dom:

[christina marie]

way back when,some where in my memories,when there was a sex life, i was usually the dominant one. always wished i could try the other side though,as am a sub at heart!

[Jessika Paige]

sadly, i am nearly always the driving force. just cant get her to take the wheel. she tries but i never see the animal inside. i wish she'd go primal on me!

[Jennaie]

As a man, I have always felt forced to take the top, but I have always wanted to be the bottom.

[pattysn]

My lady likes to keep me tied to a chair a lot of the time.

[Carol A]

Oh now are you such a bad girl she has to keep you tied up?:p

[KathrynTX]

I'd say that I'm mainly submissive in boy and girl mode, but have fantasies about being dominant with a GG while dressed.

[laura.lapinski]

If top means dominate, we are a 50/50 split. She has to be on top to climax, and I could do either. I love being both, but probably like bottom better.

[Bethany_Anne_Fae]

In guy mode definitely Dominant without question.

As Zara... not so much.

Besides... Authority needen't raise its voice ;)

Now where did I leave that crop?

LOL

Zara

[quiet_time]

I have found that if I am with a guy, then I immediately am more feminine and extremely submissive to him. I completely and totally love this feeling. However, if I am with a girl 99% of the time I am dominant towards her. I make sure guy or girl is pleased, but I try and take total control of the situation with the girl.

This has just added to my confusion about my preferences, because I would assume I would be the same towards both, but am in fact complete opposite.

[suzi_cd]

very submissive here

[LisaLedoux]

I used to be much more dominant but as I have gotten older, calmer, and more fem, I now find myself fully submissive.

[JoanFlores]

Submissive is the best for me.

[Kali]

As my SO often points out, I'm not submisive, but will occaisionally play one in the bedroom ;)

[Vickycd_pa]

As Vicky very submissive. Luv how my Gf takes charge....:D

[chrissietoo]

My first sex was on my back with an older woman straddling me. If felt right then, and it feels right now!

[Suzy Harrison]

Well I like to practice 'safe sex' - so I just say 'no'

[Marie O]

I love being Submissive, My wife seems to enjoy the Dominate role!

[Naima]

Definitely submissive. I'm just a sweetheart. lol

[RuthieER]

I consider myself a femme bottom and a butch top. I find it very easy to be submissive when dressed, and difficult to be submissive when I'm in guy mode.

Ruthie

[Valeries_Online]

I would say I switch. When I dress I usually start out as submissive. I want to be taken desperately by my wife. After being taken a while it excites me terribly and I begin to take. I don't think I've ever stayed submissive the whole time being dressed. I love to be submissive and dominant. I've noticed though after being submissive when I do dominate my wife it is more passionate domination than when not dressed.

[tracigirl_tv]

As for me, I am essentially submissive although I can and do enjoy the spectrum of D/s. I've found there is nothing quite as freeing as surrendering it all to someone you trust not to hurt you, but to push your boundaries (or what you thought were your boundaries). My partner's pleasure is my pleasure.

[Alicia_lynn419]

I tend to be (when the mood hits me) to be more Dom as my male self and sub as my fem self.....

[kristinacd55]

I've always preferred being the sub even b4 my wife found out about my cding. I always have to force myself to be dom, it's just not this girl's nature! :happy:

[stormrider]

I have been submissive for as long as I can remember, even before I became aware of my true femininity.

Michelle

[Bravesoul]

I have to be very careful how I answer this, my SO is now a member and she keeps checking up on me. If she see this I am submissive, if she doesn't than I am the dominate one. lol


But truly, I think we are 50/50..

Right Hun??:bonk:

[silkenhose]

I was not certain until my wife reminded me....... i am 100% submissive, guess i have been too busy with chores to think about this

[tinadcd]

Switch in drab, very sub dressed. I live to be dominated!

[cb]

Hi all,
My very supportive wife is starting to really enjoy dressing me up, tying me to the bed and having her way with me.
Fabulous!
Its a great life!
CB

[Rachael Turner]

Dom here definitely. Enfemme or in drab. I have a bottom streak but still call the shots even when doing that.

[angelfire]

Switch in drab, very sub dressed. I live to be dominated!

I'm pretty much the same. I can't be dominant while dressed. Its kind of weird for me in drab though. I am generally dominant, but want to be submissive, but can't do it willingly. I'd need someone to basically find a way to force me.

[Amy Hepker]

I have always been submissive, so do you want my address where to send my $50.00???