Would you really want to be a woman?

[Kate Simmons]

This may sound like a dumb question and some will say, well of course but think about it. We are always asking questions about what would we do if we were a woman for a day or a week, etc. I know we have some gals here who are 24/7 and live as women basically and seem to do quite well and have adjusted to living like that but how many of us could really pass a real life trial test, given the opportunity? I tried this last year when I first retired and pretty much did it 24/7 for 3 weeks. I had to stop and look at things realistically and quite honestly was happy to get back to my "safe haven" as a guy. There's a lot more to it than dressing nice and looking pretty.

I know the shopping, clubbing, going out and glitter are nice but that is only part of it. Even if one is adept to all the mundane household chores like cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. you still have shopping and errands to run, grocery shopping, etc. Nothing glamourous about that stuff for sure. That's not even thinking about taking care of little ones,monthly stuff, appointments and the like. It takes a special type of fortitude to do all of this. Is it any wonder that our SO gets that "look" on her face when we say we are tired because we "worked" all day?

Bottom line like my wife told me years ago when I first came out to her, there is nothing "glamourous" about being a woman. It's really about hard work, dedication and caring for your loved ones. How women do it is beyond me and it takes a special person indeed to really want to transition and fulfill all of this criteria. It's not as easy as it may seem.This is why I have to think twice these days before answering that question.:happy:

[DAVIDA]

Hi Sal!
Leave it to you to get deep on us!:heehee:
I have actually thought about this same question before. I would love to be a woman. But, I would not want to transition from male to female to achive it. Does that make sence? The reason I say that is because I would have a hard time convincing myself I was a woman if I was to transition much less anybody else. On the other hand, if I were born female, that would not be of any concern. I personally think that I would welcome(maybe not enjoy) all of the aspects of being a woman that you brought up.

[battybattybats]

Nope, at least not at the moment. Because I like my male expression as much as my female. But then I rarely used to dress fully and used to be content just mixing femininity into my masculinity so one day that may change.

Living alone right now I still have all the housework and shopping to do no matter the clothes. Some aspects of womanhood I will never be able to experience without giant leaps of science: I might be able to carry a child with substantial medical intervention but not have a natural birth or other associated things.

But my only reason right now is simply that I like being a guy too. If I could be a 'were woman' or have a gender-change potion where I could switch back and forth to match how I felt inside at any time I'd take that option for certain.

[erickka]

Hi, Sal
You, again , have given us some good food for thought. I, personally , am 100% guy who just enjoys wearing skirts and heels. I would not want to endure the stresses of everyday life in which a GG goes through. That is why I have developed a very deep respect for the opposite sex, and continuously strive to keep in touch with their world, so that I can be a better person towards ALL people.

[Charlotte Cross]

Hi Sal
A full time female? Only if I could "play" all the time, dressing to the nines, shopping, clubbing, etc.

Being married to a wonderful gal, I realize just how much she has done for our family and the sacrifices she made and some of the bad times she endured.
I gotta tell you, I couldn't have done it and kept my sanity.

The way I figure it, I can still play golf, have a beer with the guys, work around the house and get my hands dirty, be a slob when I want to, you know, guy stuff.
But then I can get showered, pull on my stockings, strap on my heels, get dressed, and spend some real quality time with my better half.

I have the best of both worlds and I wouldn't change a thing, except maybe how that new sweater dress fits me.

Charlotte

[Ashley Williams]

Ah - the ultimate question.

Surely this separates the TVs amongst us from the TGs?

When I was younger I loved the 'accoutrements' of being feminine but was never in any doubt that I wanted to stay male - chiefly because I had and still have male sexual responses and would certainly not have wanted to have periods etc!!

However, I also have lived for extended periods on my own when I have had to fulfill all the household tasks including looking out for an elderly mother as none of my sisters would or could do that.

At my age now (52) your post causes me to seriously think about it - never having done so before.

Much of it depends on what happens with my wife and I. She has stated that she sees my refusal to promise to stop dressing as jeopardising our marriage.

One of the things I think she fails to take into account is how many traditionally female things I do already and that I thought she valued, including helping very much to look after her father, the reason for our most recent house move.

But back to the physical reality. Having been prompted by your question I can see no area of my life right now that is better as a man than as a woman - apart from sex and depending on how much effort it takes to become 'passable', would really not dismiss out of hand.

Hopefully, though, I will be spared the decision because I will come to a compromise that is workable with Rosemarie and will be happy to keep myself 'split.'

Do you think it is significant, thought, that my femme name and real name are the same - just spelt differently?

Again, it is not something I had every really thought about - but hmmm. That's what happens when you read such a good thread!!

Thanks.

All the Best

Lesley (ie)

[Kate Simmons]

My thinking exactly Charlotte. It's nice to be able to put the stuff back in the drawer or closet after having some fun. The SO's don't have that option, which is why we have to treat them right and be there for them as well.;):happy:

[Charleen]

Short answer-yes.
Long answer-In a way, I am. I am now adrogynous. I live alone, and dress as I like. When I go out, It's all woman's clothing. Yes, I have to do all the mundane things, but I am true to how I feel inside. Yes, getting dressed to the nines is great! In life though those times are the exception rather then the rule. Going to a club ect. Everyday life it's jeans and a blouse.
Even when I have to be Charlie at work, on the outside, I still wear my proper under things, though I leave the bra off as it really accents my bcup bust, a blouse, womans boots, mascara, and my earrings which are definitely womans.
I have gotten past the point where I feel I gotta pass. When I go shopping and such, I am addressed as both Ma'am, and Sir in the day. Even at work, I am called Ma'am occasionally.
We talk about balance here alot. For now I feel I've achieved a good balance of who I know I am inside, and the outside I was born with.
Good question Sal.
Love and xxxx, Lily

[Eugenie]

"Would you really want to be a woman?"

Well, had I known what I know now about 30 years ago, I would have answered yes...

But now, being already 61 years old, I don't think it would be worth going through a lengthy, costly and often painful process...

I had that discussion with my wife and she is of the same opinion as I am...

:hugs:
Eugenie

[Joy Carter]

Who says being a man is easy or glamorous ? I have worked long hours to put my family in a comfortable home. Sent one to collage and helped move her countless times. I shed many tears over my son who is multi handicapped. As well as worked to educate him on his daily living skills. My lovely wife has never left wanting for help or support from her husband.
Their are just some of us who it's not about the clothes. There are some of us who really know they should have been female. There just is no way I will ever change, because my loved ones depend on me for more than monetary support. I, whether you call it selfishness or not, do dress and expierence some aspects of being a female. Id truly like to do more. It's just not possible for me to do in my life.




Bottom line like my wife told me years ago when I first came out to her, there is nothing "glamorous" about being a woman. It's really about hard work, dedication and caring for your loved ones. How women do it is beyond me and it takes a special person indeed to really want to transition and fulfill all of this criteria. It's not as easy as it may seem.This is why I have to think twice these days before answering that question.:happy:

[Kate Simmons]

Great answers all. Sometimes it takes a bit of settling in. Many of us work hard at balance and even when we have a relationship, we can make things work. Who we are inside is pretty much reflected on the outside and when we are indeed true to ourselves, it seems to pay off in more ways than one and that is part of what life is really about.:happy:

[Dita_B]

YES, YES, and YES!!!

I just have to look into the mirror, and look myself in the eyes to know the answer...

I don't like the guy in the mirror, but I LOVE the woman I see there...

And I have told her many times that I love her...

:love:Dita.

[Rita B]

Salandra, I have done all the things that women are normally responsible for except for having children and caring for young ones. I agree that it is not all glamourous and fun. Granted, there is a lot to be said to just being a guy and hanging around in your boxers and drinking beer and watching football. Still, if I could be transformed into a woman ( nice figure, no beard, etc. etc. ) I would be very happy. I would just love being pretty without having to put on makeup and all the rest of the stuff.

[il.dso]

Thanks for asking this thought-provoking and profound question.
For me, I LOVE getting completely dressed up and have been doing so for over 40 years. I certainly wish that I could spend more time dressed up and had a more supportive wife and a more tolerant society. Despite these issues, at the end of the day, I do not wish to change completely to a woman. I am a man despite my unwavering passion and devotion to crossdressing.
Thanks again for all of your posts and understanding.

[Ashly]

....had I known what I know now about 30 years ago, I would have answered yes...
But now, being already 61 years old, I don't think it would be worth going through a lengthy, costly and often painful process......

I feel the same way

[Lisa Rose]

Yes, Yes, and Yes,. Joy and Dita reflect what I feel about myself. I've stated this before, I would have luved to be the mother of my children. As the father I was, in general, denied the role of care giver when it came to my children. I was viewed as strange when it came to changing diapers, wiping tears, and giving hugs when the kids were small. I luved those chores.

The only thing I would have missed was the opportunities for sports participation. Didn't really like the competition as a guy but would have relished the challange as a girl. In the '50's it was deemed butch to be an athletic female but as we evolve thru the 60's and beyond we found the value and potential of athletic females. If the feminist movement did anything it gave women the opportunity to ''be all' and not be retricted to the kitchen and bedroom.

Yes, Yes, and Yes. I would luv to be a women.

[Kate Simmons]

This is really much more than a thinking question and I am seriously interested in all your answers. Most of you I know pretty well and your heartfelt answers are greatly appreciated. One of the reasons I am asking is that my current personal situation can go one way or the other, depending on how things work out. I want to keep my options open though and it is not entirely out of the realm of possibility for me to transition or live 24/7.

I'm just wondering if it's worth it due to my age. Does it really matter if I'm a man or a woman? Seems like I have the best of both worlds right now and would it even pay to rock the boat? Even en femme, I'm kind of a tomboy, so really what's the diff? In any case, it's a lot to think about and just because I bailed on it last year doesn't mean I would never try it again (I'm a glutton for punishment sometimes :p).

The point is, if I really wanted to do it, I could. It is a lot to think about though in any case and as Joy said, we work hard in life regardless of who or what we are.:happy:

[melissacd]

To add to the complexity of all of this, is it about wanting to be a woman or is it about wanting to express yourself in a way that most resonates with what you like.

I am in a state of total confusion about who I am at this point in my life and have no idea yet where this is all taking me, however, I know that a big part of what cross dressing is for me is a form of creative expression that dressing as a (culturally defined) standard male mode does not allow for.

If I were to dress in female clothing 7/24 and use makeup and do my hair and in all ways present a visual expression of femininity does that mean that I am trying to be a woman or am I dressing in a way that is more in sync with who I feel most comfortable dressing as?

Is it more a matter of creative expression perhaps? I absolutely know 100% that I am not a woman and have/could/would never be able to measure up to many of the women that I know. There is a level of sacrifice that so many women give that are outside of the scope of what I feel that I can achieve. There is a very strong element of masculinity within me and it manifests itself in ways that would cause many women to say, there is a typical male. I know that. That does not mean that my self expression in how I dress cannot still be feminine. It is not female (biological) but rather it is feminine (gender - which is a cultural construct). There is a big difference.

My 2 cents worth.

[Angie G]

I think I like being a part timer But it is a thought. :hugs:
Angie

[MJ]

This may sound like a dumb question and some will say, well of course but think about it. We are always asking questions about what would we do if we were a woman for a day or a week, etc.
I know we have some gals here who are 24/7 and live as women basically and seem to do quite well and have adjusted to living like that but how many of us could really pass a real life trial test, given the opportunity? I tried this last year when I first retired and pretty much did it 24/7 for 3 weeks.
I had to stop and look at things realistically and quite honestly was happy to get back to my "safe haven" as a guy. There's a lot more to it than dressing nice and looking pretty.
I know the shopping, clubbing, going out and glitter are nice but that is only part of it. Even if one is adept to all the mundane household chores like cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. you still have shopping and errands to run, grocery shopping, etc. Nothing glamourous about that stuff for sure. That's not even thinking about taking care of little ones,monthly stuff, appointments and the like. It takes a special type of fortitude to do all of this. Is it any wonder that our SO gets that "look" on her face when we say we are tired because we "worked" all day?

Bottom line like my wife told me years ago when I first came out to her, there is nothing "glamouous" about being a woman. It's really about hard work, dedication and caring for your loved ones. How women do it is beyond me and it takes a special person indeed to really want to transition and fulfill all of this criteria. It's not as easy as it may seem.This is why I have to think twice these days before answering that question.:happy:

to answer your question Sal Hell no
i am glad you tried as now you understand the complexities in being a woman apart from living full time try finding a job .. and if you don't look perfect when you leave your house / apartment you can leave yourself open for a very bad day !!! , it's the other people we have to worry about if one gets read .. you never know how they will react.. and this passing thing is over rated the best i can hope for is to blend in ..

And at what cost... my wife ,kids ,family ,friends , myjob ...if i had not done this it may have been my life

[Teresa Amina]

The trouble with both "man" and "woman" is we're dealing with cultural expectations and assumed roles. I will Be and am Becoming, yet I've no intention (even if such we're possible) to take on those culturally stereotypical expectations. Wasn't there a fairly disruptive movement to end such oppression? I think they called it women's liberation, didn't they? But all it seems to have done is pile another burden on women- to go out and have a career, too, with no lessening of the other expectations.
We restructure our bodies, why not our assumptions? To Be a Woman it is not necessary to be Burdened as women often are.

[Julogden]

If I han't turned so #@!!* tall, and didn't have kids, I would definitely at least taken a shot at living as a woman 24/7 when I was young. I still think about giving it a try, but that would require me to develop a much thicker skin, as I know I'm not going to pass.

I wouldn't be all girly-girl all the time, other than makeup and a feminine hair style, as I'm most comfortable in jeans and a casual top or comparably comfortable clothing, but I would definitely get dressier, and enjoy it, when the occasion called for it. I think it would be exhausting to be in heels-and-hose mode all the time, and it's just not practical.:2c:

Carol

[Jilmac]

Hi Sal, Very profound but right on as well. I think many of us (myself included) wish secretly that we had been born female. But I also know from being close to all the women in my life, that it can be much more difficult than being a genetic male. As you stated, we can always revert back to our safe haven of masculinity, but genetic women are women forever.
Jill

[tommi]

20 years ago while living on my own I wish I knew then what I know now.
Married 15yrs with an 11 year old that I love more than anything else no
but dressing in the closet has still put levels of stress on my life and marriage.

[Maggie Kay]

Do I want to be a woman? Do I want to be a millionaire? Do I want to be famous?
Sure, yes to all of the above. Now for the brass tacks. Like it or not, I realized I am a woman and can only find peace if I start transitioning to be myself. Am I a famous millionaire? Heck no. Will I be despondent and consider suicide if I can't be a famous millionaire? No! However, if I am prevented from becoming my true self, I am despondent, I cannot work and I am a wreck.
For me it is so far past wanting. However, sometimes, I wish that it would all go away and that I could function as a male. No chance of that now. A tough road for sure.

[denise-x]

As long as I can remember, as young as age 3 or 4 I always had feminine desires. I always wanted to dress as a girl and do girlie things. I always wanted to be caressed by a man, to nurture my children and yes even take care of a home. However, as society dictated, I lived and tried to live as a guy is expected to. I went out for physical sports in school, even though I hated it. I strongly disliked manly type occupations or vocations. The only thing I had courage to do was wear womans clothing and go out in the evening. Personally, I don't see anything wrong in dressing as you want to be comfortable. I see Scotsmen wearing kilts,which is only a skirt, and it looks very appealing and comfortable, so why not all guys who want to wear skirts?
When I was in my 50's I expressed my feeling to a friend of mine. He looked at me and asked why I don't just go ahead and fillful my feelings. After telling him that I didn't want to be known as a queer or whatever name one calls a gay guy. He pulled me to him and held me and caressed me, well I had the greatest experience of my life. Even though I openly live as a man, I have many male and female friends who treat me and respect me as a woman.

If I had the guts, and didn't have any children, who'd disown me if they knew, I would have gone the whole way and transitioned.

Be true to yourself

LOVE TO ALL
:hugs:
Denise

[KatieC]

Assuming personality quirks, likes/dislikes, and abilities would all more-or-less be the same, I think I would have been happier with my place in the world had I been born female. But I wasn't, and there are so many wonderful things in my life that would be so different that I can't even imagine it (my wife and kids in particular) that I don't really dwell much on the "would you want to be a woman" question.

My transgenderedness is much more along the lines of "I don't want to be (seen as) 'male'" rather than "I want to be (seen as) a woman". If only our culture had a viable third-gender role!

Basically, I want to feel free to be "me", who is neither male nor female but rather a blend of the two, without the fear of ridicule or ostracism.

[Marvina Martian]

I have had this discussion with my wife recently...
I have thought long and hard and know in my heart that if we had never met I most likely would have transitioned long ago.

Now I would have loved to be born a girl, actually when I was little I always wished for it!
So now here I sit, A place between hurting the one person I love the most and my own happiness. Overall I am a pretty upbeat and happy person, even with hiding my secret. I could realistically keep hiding it the rest of my life and be OK. Although I would never be whole.

So, here we are.....At the crossroads of life.

Good question Sal ;)

[JackieInPA]

I have given this subject much thought...indeed i have thought about it every day since i was knowing enough to realizes girls and boys were different. I want to be a daughter, a girlfriend, lover, wife, mother, grandmother. I want it so that sometimes I feel an almost physical pain. Is the female world easier? Prolly not, but it is the world i want to live in. I am not and dont plan on transitioning. I dont feel that will make me a woman, i consider that extremem crossdressing lol. Now dont take offense, I admire those that have the courage to go that rout. If i cant have the real thing I'll settle for pretending when i can. I am married to a wonderful woman who accepts me for who i am and even plays around with me en femme. I have been called a lesbian in a mans body by several of my friends, more like a bi woman in a mans body, cause i do look at some men and wish, but i dont wish for man to man i wish for woman to man.

In 75%+ of my dreams i am a woman that tells me where my innermindset is i think.

[AmandaM]

I have thought about transitioning, but, I have to pass as a woman. I don't want to always be questioned about my gender. I don't want to be an outsider, I want to be free. To me, even though transition is desirable, being accepted is more important. In my 20's this was possible, now I'm not so sure in my 40's. It's like I am on this life train that moves too quick, along comes wife and kids and career and all of a sudden, I'm 20 years older and don't know how to get off the train, or if I even want to. I think my situation is similar to transsexuals 100 years ago. There was no operation, so what do you do? You kinda get taken for a ride.

[NYsong]

No, Yes, and all thats in between. Personally, when my social life is thriving (like its not right now), I love my position. I look great and feel great as both, and the ability to change fairly quickly is awesome.

[UASIANGAL]

My goodness, this question sure dug up a lot of deep thoughts!!! Gee, I just think it simply and straight forward SURE, I would like to be a girl in another life. I don't carry all boy's baggage to this question. If I imagine myself as a women, it would be right from the start and I would be just person like everyone else. Life is what you make of it so I would choose to make it wonderful. You didn't ask me if I wanted a sex change, hormones, pain, crabby boyfriend, ungrateful kids, lazy bum husband, or dish pan hands! God all mighty, it's an imaginary scenario girls! Be creatively positive .... geeeezzzz! :tongueout

[Sonia_cd]

First of all, thank you for asking this question on a serious level as opposed to posting a poll.

Second, to answer your question at a very simplistic level, no, I would not want to be a woman 24/7/365. Don't get me wrong, I admire and respect women for their versatility, nurturing ability, energy and ability to balance a career, home and family with such ease. Being all of that in one is certainly not an easy task nor is it acknowledged quite enough. Dressing to the nines, the wonderful fabrics and clothes are addictive and to die for, but that is almost like a reward for all the hard work that goes into being a woman.

Besides I like my life a guy enough not to want to give it up. Yes, I would love to walk into a store and try on clothes endlessly but I have to put up with unwanted advances from desperate men, comments about the kind of clothes I wear and let's not forget a woman's worst nightmare, sexual abuse. Do I really want all that? I really think not!!

Does that make any sense?

Love,
Sonia

[Nicole Erin]

...how many of us could really pass a real life trial test, given the opportunity? I tried this last year when I first retired and pretty much did it 24/7 for 3 weeks. I had to stop and look at things realistically and quite honestly was happy to get back to my "safe haven" as a guy. There's a lot more to it than dressing nice and looking pretty. That haven we enjoy is called "male privelege"

I know the shopping, clubbing, going out and glitter are nice but that is only part of it. Even if one is adept to all the mundane household chores like cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. you still have shopping and errands to run, grocery shopping, etc. I do most of that, my wife does not. Nothing glamourous about that stuff for sure. That's not even thinking about taking care of little ones,monthly stuff, appointments and the like. I do that too. Our "little one" is a preteen so he is lower maintenance It takes a special type of fortitude to do all of this. I have that special fortitude, IOW, I rule! Is it any wonder that our SO gets that "look" on her face when we say we are tired because we "worked" all day?

Bottom line like my wife told me years ago when I first came out to her, there is nothing "glamourous" about being a woman. It's really about hard work, dedication and caring for your loved ones. How women do it is beyond me and it takes a special person indeed to really want to transition and fulfill all of this criteria. It's not as easy as it may seem.This is why I have to think twice these days before answering that question.:happy:

I admit I AM guilty of letting the femme take care of most family obligations. I don't Xmas shop or any of that. But yeah most of that stuff I do anyways.

The femme and I kinda share a lot of chores. Depends on who is home and when and what needs done.

By the way, if I were to be a woman 24/7, do I have to have periods? :o

[LisaLedoux]

Years ago when I was younger the answer was NO! but now that I've gotten older, some of my sex drive has decreased and I am more financially sound and have more free time, the answer is a resounding YES!

[bEEb]

No. But I would like to have a body like one. Especially a buxom one.

[Mariah]

I am a female, Working on the outside now. :P


keris

[Carol A]

I think about it all the time BUT!, I had the chance to go full time last year when the wife was away in Germany for 3 weeks.
Oh my I had one hell of a good time going out everyday and enjoying my freedom, but after a week I was ready to go back being a male. Man all the makeup the time to get dressed or down dressing during the day it's a lot of work. As much as I would like to go full time I don't think so. :heehee:

[Jennifer Giovannetta]

Hi Salandra. The thought of being a woman permanently has crossed my mind a few times. The answer is no. I would not like to be a woman. You said it best, you reffered to it as your "safe haven as a guy". When I read this I had to respond because it really hit the nail on the head for me. Sometimes when I am dressed, I do not want to go back to being a guy. But when I do go back, its sort of like im home again. Dont get me wrong, I love to become Jennifer. And I am thankful for this, because I cannot imagine the wanting of becoming a woman full time. I like to be a man too. Thanks for the food for though Salandra.

[Colleentg]

Yes, I continue to dream it.

[Cassy11]

Salandra you really struck a chord in me when you mentioned hard work dedication and caring for your loved ones. When my mother inlaw who was ill and up in age fell and broke her hip she and my sister inlaw who has Down Syndrome moved into our home. My wife cared for her 24/7 until she passed. My sister inlaw still lives with us and requires a lot of care. She has been with us 8 years.

It seems to me when it comes to caring for the elderly parents or a sick sibling it's the women of the family who are called upon to do the task. It's very rare when I hear of a guy jumping up to say I'll do it. A friend on this site "Julogden" could probably say something about that.

I love the dressing and my wife supports my doing it but I couldn't be a woman 24/7

[srinn]

I probably couldn't act like a girl/woman all the time so the answer is no...

[Sinthia]

I grew up many years ago, and things were difinitely different then. One of my brothers and said more than once that 'that was all we knew'. You cannot go back and change the way things were when you were young, and it does no good to be bitter and hateful about not having things or having the time to do as you please as some of your friends did.

The same can be said about your question. Being raised as a male is 'all we knew'! I dream of being able to look and act female, being able to wear whatever I want whenever I want, etc., but I did not grow up that way, and would not want to give up the memories and life that I have had already. Perhaps I do not have as strong a desire at crossdressing as some of you seem to have, but I do enjoy the feeling that I do have, and do not want it to go away.

[Nikki A.]

Hi Sal
I guess it is all a matter of degrees. If we were GGs then dressing down isn't a problem, you are a woman and look it make up or not. For most of us this is not true, take off the war paint and padding and we are guys.
Being a woman is not easy, but neither is being a guy sometimes. In my case I am now Mom and Dad to my two teens, I'm lucky in that they are a help and do share the load.
I guess that my answer is yes. If I was naturally passable, and much youger and thinner. At this point in time, I guess the answer is no.

[wishonastar]

I do know that being a woman is not about glamor and being beautiful all the time. Nice clothes, jewelry, make up etc.

They have the same problems men do, zits, job problems, hair problems etc.

I think it is mainly about how one like ones self. I do not like my body or looking in the mirror. I do not like being a man it is too much pressure and stress to be in charge and being the one ALWAYS responsible for everything like money. I am tired of it. Anything does wrong it is my fault.

I do not know if I could make it as a woman because it is a different life style. I have been in this one for 50 some years. Also being a beautiful woman is a burden. I would not like the attention all the time. But once in a while would be nice.

So would I really want to be a woman? In the next life if it is possible. I am stuck in this one as a man, as frustrating as it is! And at my age making changes like that does not make sense.

[Stephanie]

These days, this sort of question is so difficult to answer because, at least to me, I don't see a LOT of clear differences between what it means to be "be a man" or "be a woman" (beyond the obvious anatomical differences) in today's society in terms of significant advantages or disadvantages. I can't really imagine any specific advantages to actually becoming a woman that would change my life in any significant way if I were given the opportunity to magically become a woman other than for being able to experience what it would be like to have a few different body parts and/or an expanded choice of "socially acceptable" attire every day. For me at least those two things wouldn't really be enough to convince me to want to become a woman on a permanent basis, which is why I have absolutely no interest in ever having a sex change. It would certainly be interesting to experience being a woman for just a few days to check it out but I don't want to alter my physical appearance permanently (other than maybe getting rid of annoying body hair), at least not until my next incarnation. :p Also, no sex change will EVER make anybody a true member of the opposite sex in terms of full biological functioning (i.e. pregnancy, etc.). Frankly, I'm perfectly happy being an open-minded man who just happens to enjoy playing "dress up" every once in a while for a bit of fun.

[Chrissy8888]

This is a difficult post to reply to. I am not really sure that this really has any baring on this post or not. It is my belief that everybody’s level of femininity (or desire to be a woman) depends on each individual. For some, they simply enjoy wearing female clothing. They like the way it feels and makes them feel. For others it is much deeper than that. Even though they may never have surgery they are truly transgender. Again it is an individual thing.

For the simple cross-dresser, the answer to this may (or may not) be hell no. For the transgender person it will be the same. However I think that the feelings of a true transgender person is more female oriented than male oriented. With that said several of you commented about how hard it is to be a woman. Well without a doubt that is true. Most woman I know go about 23/7. They never ask for anything in return. They just do it!!! Several of you commented on what it takes to prepare yourself as a woman. It does take great time to prepare yourself to look good. Just like men have been raised to be men, women have been raised to be women. Most of us despite our age are really like a teenaged girl. We are learning what it takes to be a woman.

So what about me. Well I really feel that I was born in the wrong body. It has always been that way. I remember being like 5 years old playing with a little neighbor girl and telling her I really wished I was a girl. Like many of you I even wished and prayed it would happen but it didn’t. I was made the way I was. So if I could live as a woman 24/7 would I. I absolutely would. However it is because my brain tells me what woman do in life is what I should be doing. Not the guy things. However I really don’t think I will ever be at a point where I could transition. I have really come to terms with that. So I will be the very best man that I can be, and the very best woman, all at once. I think even though you might look like a guy you can be a woman too. In today’s society there is not as much emphasis on being macho or in total control. Woman too (although not as much as should be) are becoming powerful. If I can just learn to balance both worlds than I will be was womanly and manly as I can. In my heart I will be both a man and woman 24/7.

Sorry that this is so long and don’t hate me for rambling or even deviating from the subject.

[Traci_Ann CD]

I never would've thought about this years ago BUT here recently.....it's something that has crossed my mind.

I think it would be a nice feeling to get up in the morning, take a shower, cleaned up and put some makeup on (lipstick, etc), slip on a tight-n-sexy business suit, some heels, grab my purse walk confidently out the door to work. Knowing I look very good-n-sexy and all eyes will be on me (women and men). Knowing I AM the center of everyones attention. Does have a nice feeling about it.


I know it won't happen right now....but who knows.....the more and more I think about it.....I may transition into womanhood somewhere down the road.

[Kieroney]

Funny you should ask that question, I find myself saying the same things, your wife is correct, being a woman all the time would be way to much hassle and a pain. If I was total complete gg at birth then the story would be different of course, I just like my cake and Icecream to.

[Kayla_CD]

I could never be a woman for real. I think half of what makes crossdressing fun is that it's special and different. If I had to spend an hour on hair and make up every morning I'd start resenting it.

[jennifer41356]

I would take it all, the PMS and all, I embrace all the it is to be female, I would take the good (and there is a lot) with the negative....I would do it in a second:love:

[Jennifer Brooks]

No. What I see them go through on a daily basis and how they get hounded by guys and made to feel like dogs at times.................. "Hell NO!" I'll stick to my dressing as time allows. :2c:

[alyssalove56]

wow, great thread.
as someone who only started really living my feelings in the last couple of years, i am trying to figure out where i am really. i can identitfy with many of the posts. i know i am soft and only comfortable when i am dressed en femme and expressing my true personality as a girl/woman. i also know i wouldn't trade my children, grandchildren, etc. for anything. i know that it took me forty of my fifty years to even be able to voice my feelings. i am lucky to have a mate and great gg friends to help... i hope a couple of my old male pals can handle it. BUT i must say, if lived in todays world and knew at a young age what i know about myself now, i would transition.
so to all of us who have made it work for so many years and found so much love in spite of what we went through, in spite of having to live every day with so much effort and travail- god bless us all.

[Jennaie]

Your question is simply "would you really want to be a woman". At this time in my life, I would not want to become a woman.

That said, I will say that looking back over the whole picture, I do honestly feel that I would have been more comfortable in this life had I been born female.

It's not all sacrifice, hard work, etc... I know lots of women who enjoy rockclimbing, backpacking, having a beer, and many of them are better at it than I am. I think I would have made a great woman, thats all.

[Donnadcd]

and without giving it a second thought. Wish I did it sooner.

[Megan70]

:happy:I love to dress, I love to do my makeup and wigs, I love to go out in public.... but only when I choose to, or have the urge. I would have to force myself into an unnatural action if I tried to transition and HAD to live as a woman 24/7 for a full year. I couldn't do it. I go through mood swings as it is and I hate having to force myself to do something when I'm not up for it.

Lets play devils advocate here and look at the other side of the coin.Say that:
You are born a girl , grow up expecting to be popular, beautiful. feminine, and a models body, BUT what if that didn't happen and you were born a woman (which is what you wished for) BUT grew up to be ugly, no one asked you out, unpopular, unfeminine, fat and frumpy with greasy hair and a bad completion with bad teeth.:eek:

Would you still want to be THAT woman you wanted to be born as?
I don't think so. We as transvestites think the whole feminine world as we know it and perceive it thru rose colored glasses is all hunky Dorey, but what if the opposite were true and you had no control over how you turned "out" as a genetic woman.
Disappointed, no you would have never known any other way and maybe yearned to be born a handsome guy and switch the miserable female life and body you were born into into that guy. A case of double role reversal.
Life always seems better on the other side, until we've reached it.
Something to think about.:straightface:

[sissystephanie]

There was a time, a few years back when my wife passed away, when I would have said very defininetly YES! However, that was then and this is now. My answer now would be a definite NO! For that, I thank with all my heart, my beloved GGF in Scotland! She convinced me to stay the man I was born and not to have SRS, which I was considering. I was very depressed, and felt lost without my wife.

I was born a man, but I long ago realized that I did like to dress as a woman. Purely to satisfy myself, not to attract men or for any sexual reason. Just because I like pretty clothes and the way feminine clothing fits me. I am 5 foot 10 inches, but small boned and not very heavy in the weight department. Size 16 fits me perfectly in most cases, as though it had been made for me.

When my wife was alive she always did my makeup and wig, so that I could easily pass. Now that she is gone, I do not try to pass since I am not very good with either makeup or my wig. However, I still go out in public dressed in feminine outfits very often. I believe that I am the epitome of a crossdresser, "one who wears the clothing of the opposite sex for the enjoyment of doing so." So, yes I love to dress up like a woman, but underneath the satin and lace I am still a Man and proud of it!

Sissy/Stephanie

Girl on the outside, man underneath

[TaylorAB]

Even with all that comes with it, I would want to be. I wish I had been from birth. When I see boy drab in the mirror, I feel that fate played a cruel game on me. :(

[Rene]

Without even giving it a second thought. I was four years old when I told a nieghbor lady I wanted to be a girl, nothing has changed. It is a struggle to keep from transitioning, but if I had a choise in the matter; with out question, all the good and bad.

[teresa jeen]

I would have wanted to be female for many reasons, one they are much more emotional than we are. thats a good and bad thing.but when we let our emotions go were better off, life is all about emotions, from birth to death.My emtions tell me that id be a better woman than a man. i had no choice being born with the wrong acurements. but... (theres that big ole but) that doesnt stop me from being the best i can be as a person no matter what i choose to wear that day.

[androgyne]

When I see boy drab in the mirror, I feel that fate played a cruel game on me. :(

Hunni, you look beautiful :)

[rickie121x]

If I could change, yes I would. And now for the but, the however, the considerations.... For many of us, the inner secretive wish to be a woman is deeply resident in our minds. Knowing that, for most of us, transitioning would produce only a facsimile of a woman, I could not deal with the difficulties and social disturbances that would cause for myself, my family, my friends and potential friends. I believe that it would be an extremely selfish act for me to undertake.

Further, I have lived nearly a whole "life" as a male, and know how to do that, rather well, I add. I do not believe that I could, in my remaining years, learn a whole new culture, literally a whole new social language - and - as a facsimile would face not only continuing social difficulties but also physical unknowns as the result of the surgeries.

A coward, choosing to run away from the conflict, yet to live another day; am I. But I get to dabble and to play with the womanly delights that cause me to be enlivened, delighted, and invigorated. Ummm, ummm good!

And I would guess that is why I am on the cross dresser website rather than writing for or hanging out with the transexual folks. Or, imagine this; reading recipies, makup tips, and love notions on Martha Stewart's website

Wheeeee, Rickie :love:

PS: And I agree with Teresa jeen that "I would have been a better woman than a man."

[dianarg]

Sometimes I really want to be a woman, but then I think about all the effort, and most of all the risks associated with it, like not finding a job or not finding respect, that I end up conforming to this way of life. I know it sucks to be dressed only at home, but it's the best way some of us can cope with it.

[LilSissyStevie]

I really wanted to be a girl up until I reached puberty. Once I realized what my "thingy" was good for, I didn't want to give it up. So, now I'm certainly not a woman and hardly a man nor am I anything in between. I'm a freak, a weirdo, an individual. :devil: Life is good!:tongueout

[Jan W]

Yep

[charllote34]

Another great topic by you salandra . Woman or not , man or not?? well each as there own ticks and crosses .Fortunatly for us we can experiance a little of the other but without actually physically being a woman i cant comment .Yesterday a GG friend of mine who knows i cd said to me its great being a woman , but she is completly crazy LOL :devil:

[Kelsy]

Yes Salandra,

As the years go by, I have realized that in fact that is exactly what I have always wanted to be. It is not , without a doubt just about glamour and glitter. Its is not about the clothes, the jewels the shoes etc that is all window dressing. a way to express yourself. It is about caring for others and hard work. It is also about being able to feel, to feel deeply emotionaly. being vunerable and being strong. I have always thought that men are the weaker sex. That being said I doubt wether I will ever transition. I Love my wife and she wants her man and I can be that for her. She accepts me as I am and that is a wonderful thing. Thanks for your thought provoking posts!!

:hugs:Kelsy

[Suzy Harrison]

Megan made a good point - what if you were an ugly woman - how would you feel? What if you were a girl - but you didn't look as good as you do now?

Having said that I still would prefer to be a woman. I don't believe for a moment it would be fun all the way, but it would be worth it I think.

Its odd but 20 years ago I would have said 'no' - but the older I get the more I feel I want this.....

[Kate Simmons]

I agree with Teresa Amina in that even given the opportunity I would not be a "typical" woman. For me being a woman is all about adventure and that is MY fantasy. No white picket fence, dog and cat or 3 1/2 kids for this gal. Being an adventuress who makes a difference is where it is at for me. On the other side of the coin, I had my family and a good life as my guy self and did my best as a husband and father and thoroughly enjoyed doing that even though it was partly an act with respect to who I was deeply inside.

Because of the way things worked out, however, after I came "out" and began exploring my feelings, I lost my family because they could not deal with the changes in me. Whichever way things go, I want my remaining years to be productive ones, so it seems I'm at a sort of crossroad right now. 2008 will be a "year of change" for me in many ways as it will be for the rest of the world and anything can happen really. Thank you all for your very profound answers and comments. You've given me much to consider.:happy:

[Suzie S.]

Hi Sal, deep question, but well worth answering. The answer is easy for me. NO WAY! :eek: Not in this life. I'm a guy, and a crossdresser, that's it. I've been a guy for 43 years, It's all I know. I enjoy doing guy stuff and being a guy. Sure I've fantasized about what it would be like to be a woman (most of us do) , and yes, it is is appealing to me, but it's just a fantasy. I'm not going to act on it. I have a real life, being a guy, a husband, a friend to many, a son to my mother, and I plan to finish this life as such. :happy:

I've never considered being born male as bearing a cross. I'm fine with it. I'll just continue to enjoy the life I have now as a crossdresser. ...and yes, if you remember the reincarnation thread, I did say in my next life I'd like to be born female. Why not experience the other side of the fence next time 'round. But right now I'm busy enough keeping up with all the responsibilities and expectations on the side of the fence I'm currently standing on. I do have to say my grass is quite green right here! :thumbsup::happy: (My neighbor's lawn really does suck, btw :tongueout )

[Teresa Amina]

the risks associated with it, like not finding a job or not finding respect

Hardly a problem for just women :2c:

[dianarg]

Hardly a problem for just women :2c:

yeah, but it gets much tougher if your a TS.

[Hali]

May be something happened to me during the great "hormone wash" (that is when we are babies during the trimesters as fetus cos am convinced that my desire for CDing is beyond psychological it has to be biological cos i dont think psychological desires can have such strength on me) or what ever they call it, i think my desire to immitate women doesnt stop at wearing their cloths am not happy with being rough or untidy or aggressive like a typical guy all i want is to be timid/gentle or neat or passive as per letting things go sometimes, .........in the end if you have such attitudes i just mensioned pple (men) will see you as being a bit weak and unfit for the man's world (what ever that is), so i choose to be soft, gentle, kind, smooth............to the point of desiring to have female body and attitude cos i find them more mature, i want to have the power to have babies
sometimes i find babies crying exciting and sweet.
Am not sure whether i'll have i better deal in life if i was a woman. My desire is to be a young woman- then a middle aged woman-then an old woman i want to have grand children as a woman i want to loose my hair due to old age as a woman i want to see how my breasts will age and sag as a woman i want to reach a stage where men wont find me attractive as a woman i want to die as woman.
Am not interested in gay men i want straight men whole'll love me as a woman (to adopt a child and so on, and raise a family).

But on the other hand i'll miss being a man cos it was fun and am kind of a role model for most men.

[JoAnnDallas]

I was reading recently where they for the first time was able to successfully transplate a womb and overaies from one GG to another. The GG that recieve them not only did not have any rejection, but started having her period.
I got thinking, if a post-op TS had this transplant, she would then be as close as possible to a real GG. She would have periods, PMS, and all that goes with it. She might even be able to get pregnat. LOL

[docrobbysherry]

At least, the kind I fantasize about having as a girlfriend. I often refer to Sherry in the third person, because that's how I think of her. So, I am my own fantasy girlfriend at present! Young, hot, ****ty, and she never nags or complains! Sherry is the perfect woman for Robert rite now!

No, I wouldn't change ANYTHING about my life, for the time being. Certainly not my sex! That would ruin the whole fantasy arrangement I've developed!
RS

[sybercom11]

My wife once said to me, you know if you were a woman you would have to put up with cramps and bleeding every month, having babies, being discriminated against in the workplace, other female physical problems, harassment, etc. etc. etc.

She said, you like playing a woman, but would you really want to be a woman?

I left that unanswered. But Yes I would want to be. Because being a woman is inside of me. There are things that males have to put with, so I could certainly deal with the things women have to put up with.

[fancy nancy]

If I could become a 100% woman,I would do it in a heartbeat .I always feel my true self when dressed in my dresses and tights.If I had the money to go through the changes I probaly would .

[Stormgirl]

Now that I think about it, I don't think I would really want to be a woman. I'm in one of my angry moods again. :mad:

[PortiaHoney]

Wow, what a lot of different answers. Mine, depends on the day, hour, minute. Which is why I haven't made any changes.
When I was a teen, I suffered very much pondering what if, should I, could I.
If I had been born female, I wouldn't have this dilemma - or maybe - I would just have the opposite problem - wanting to be a guy. Maybe, I am just hard to please.
I have finally come to terms with how I feel and have learned to live with it. I accept that some days I am, some days I'm not. I just don't have the commitment to change on the outside so I will just be who I am and accept that the person in the mirror is close to who I am inside, even though the reflection is not always what I want to see.
:happy:

[Joni Beauman]

I think so. It has been a lifelong thing. I am reading True Selves, an account by a Psychologist in SF who treats ts patients (M-F and F-M). I am trying to sort it out for myself - some of the issues described for adolescence, teen years, and beyond for her patients seems familiar except for the sexuality. I have always been hopelessly interested in women and she describes her ts patients are being very conflicted in their sexuality. Another book I read recently in this search was Brain Gender, by a human physiologist interested in gender issues - she went into the the biology of hormones and development at different life stages and influences on gender (physical and psychological). It provides a biological basis for the continuous gradient idea for gender conceptualization. Too bad our choices tend to be join one club or the other, publicly at least. Joni

[vivianann]

Yes I want to be a woman, I know it is not all roses, but I would be the woman that I was meant to be. :love:

[Laurelanne]

I do I started young around 11 or 12 when I was 16 I read about Christine Jorgenson and I wanted to change. For whatever reason I didnt and went on as a guy When I was divorced from my first wife at 35 I wanted to get at least breast augmentation I took hormones instead again something slowed me down (I do have little cute ones) anyway now that Im too old I really regret not doing it. YES I want to be a woman L

[Lisa Golightly]

Well I'd rather be one or the other... Rather than both to be honest. If my female mind had been installed in a female body then life would have been life rather than existence, and I'm sure if my male body had been given a male mind it would have been quite happy... Probably have gone to a lot of parties... and been quite sociable.... lol... :)

[Raychel]

No, No, Not for me. There is no way that I could do all that a my woman does in a day.

Get up,
Get showered and all pretty for the day.
Work all Day
Come Home
Get Changed into everyday clothes
Make Dinner,
Deal with screaming kids
Do Dishes
Do Laundry
Make Lunches, for next day
Swap Laundry
Go to bed
Read for 1/2 hour
Sleep

Repeat

I get tired just typing it out. :rolleyes:

[JennifertampaCD]

Yes.....:-)

[JoAnnDallas]

I read where a team of doctors were successful at transplating a womb and ovariers from one GG to another. I guess they could as well transplant from a GG to a CD/TG/TS. Then that person COULD experience all of the tribulations that a real GG goes thru. LOL

[Patti Girl]

No. I feel that I am "somewhere inbetween". I have some feminine traits (according to my wife), and some masculine ones. I doubt that I'd really fit in as a full woman, but I can enjoy my feminine side while still doing other things that are more masculine.

Good discussion!

Patti

[KateSpade83]

I prefer that I should have been born a pretty woman, - in a good country like the USA. No Muslim, African, or Third World country. No sex change can give me that so I just live a guys life. The advantage of being a woman - you won't get drafted like during WW 2 or Vietnam. Bad thing though is multiple child pregnancies and having a rotten husband.

[sillyfish]

I dont think i would enjoy being a real girl to be honest, there are just so many aspects that are way too different so yeah. its a nice thought though haha

[Dalece]

Yes, right now I would. As Raychel says obout laundry and stuff . I do that now the only thing is I don't have to worry about kids because there grown. When I can i do that dressed.

[stormrider]

YES! YES! YES! A hundred times YES!

[thatgirl]

YES i want to be a women

[Amy07]

I love being male, but will not give up my femme things. Dressing is a close part of me. It is not a binary choice, imho, just do what you want to do when you want to do it.

[Deidra Cowen]

I like being a silly part time Tgirl! Probably even if I did not have kids and job obligations would not go full time and become a woman. But I could see myself going enfemme a lot more! Hmmmm....5 or 6 days a week?

But I am lucky being single and living in a big liberal city where ya can run around as both a guy and a tgirl and no one really bothers me about it.

[Josephine 2006]

The answer is of course YES. Now, do I have to qualify that I would not ever want to change the relationships with the ones that I love and my children, of course, never would want to change that. BUT, YES!

[AmandaM]

I think that if I was a woman, I'd just toss on some blue jeans, a top, and brush my hair. Forget that makeup stuff. In this context, yes, I could do that. :) All that makeup and hair stuff is compensation and trying to hide the male self. Think about it. Would you be female if you didn't have all the female clothes, makeup, and jewelry?

[shirley1]

i dont think i could be a real women even if i wanted to - i just love the thrill and alter ego - i still have problems puttin on tights ladders left right and centre caus i havnt got the patience to put them on carefully - when i dress up i just want to get the clothes on then i can relax - but its harder or at least more time consuming than dressin in male mode - then i think how could i do this every day with 20 mins to spare before i go out to work ! women are trained to do this from an early age - and the ones that dont opt out and dress more like men - its hard work i think being a gg i understand that much now - women have the best of both worlds - men just dont have to make the effort !

[Kate Simmons]

I think that if I was a woman, I'd just toss on some blue jeans, a top, and brush my hair. Forget that makeup stuff. In this context, yes, I could do that. :) All that makeup and hair stuff is compensation and trying to hide the male self. Think about it. Would you be female if you didn't have all the female clothes, makeup, and jewelry?Yep, that's pretty much my thinking as well Amanda.:happy:

[bobbi]

Absolutely, if things had been differant in my early life I would now be a woman. Sadly now it's a little too late.

[TGMarla]

Well I'd rather be one or the other... Rather than both to be honest. If my female mind had been installed in a female body then life would have been life rather than existence, and I'm sure if my male body had been given a male mind it would have been quite happy... I concur. The gender confusion is the raw end of the deal. I'm real happy wearing dresses and the like, but I still can't live it to the fullest as a part of my life. Sometimes I feel like I got ripped off, because the whole girl thing seems so much more normal to me at times. I'd be happier as a guy if I thought as most guys do. Same if I'd have been born a girl. There wouldn't be this constant confusion going on.

That said, I couldn't at this point in my life imagine my life without crossdressing. Since I can't have it as a mainstream part of my life, like women can, then I'm forced to do it in private. But I want it there.

So sure. I'd like to have been a woman. But I'm not, so I make do. I try to exploit the benefits of being a man as best I can, and I do the woman thing on my own time. But I'm not willing to go through transition to be a woman.

Kudos to you, though, Karen! You're the best! :happy:

[Valeria]

I read where a team of doctors were successful at transplating a womb and ovariers from one GG to another. I guess they could as well transplant from a GG to a CD/TG/TS. Then that person COULD experience all of the tribulations that a real GG goes thru. LOL
The only case I know of, the whole point was just to allow her to give childbirth. They had to give her powerful immunosuppressants, and as soon as she'd delivered they removed the transplanted organs so that they could allow her immune system to return to normal.

A TG would not have the proper hip bone structue to give vaginal birth, so at best they could carry a baby and deliver (probably early) by C-section. Except that there are a bunch of reasons why this is a questionable idea (and it's not so clear it was wise even for the GG), so I wouldn't expect to see it happen anytime soon.

[deja true]

Now look what you've done!

All of you!

With every post, I changed my mind!

Now I'm more confused an conflicted than ever!

I hate you for this question, Salandra!

I love you for this question, Salandra!

deja

Thanks for making me cry, again, you bitches!

[suzannecarr]

i have to say, that i agree so much with the point about feeling ripped off!! i look at other women and sometimes think" girl you dont know how lucky you are!" able to wear their hair a hundred different ways, able to wear such comfortable clothes(at least to me!) and the style and the matching of shoes and the whole different makeup for different feelings or days or clothes or attitudes!! i just feel as though i cant express myself as a man, and i feel as though some women who maybe need a makeover but wont do it , are so lazy !!!! i just want to walk up to them and say " look girl, you could look so cute if you would just cut your hair , let me take you to the mall, and for Gods sake, pluck your eyebrows once in a while woman!!!" ok, im alright now, no im not, im still a guy, wait, "click, click" theres no place like woman hood, theres no place like womanhood" girls(GGs) always remember this, everytime that you leave that house looking awful, or halfway fixed up, remember somewhere theres a guy standing in front of a mirror, going nowhere but looking ready to go to the opera, dancing, etc.) so remember to look marvelous while you can( one day you wont be able to wear that dress!)) btw i gotta go on a diet, im getting sooooooooo fat!!<, suz:heehee:

[DanaR]

"Would you really want to be a woman?"

Well, had I known what I know now about 30 years ago, I would have answered yes...

But now, being already 61 years old, I don't think it would be worth going through a lengthy, costly and often painful process...

I had that discussion with my wife and she is of the same opinion as I am...

:hugs:
Eugenie

I agree, the cost would be too much. I have a good relationship with my wife and daughters, but if I were to transition, I would probably loose that. My youngest daughter is a school teacher, has MS and lives nearby, I don't think that I could deal with bringing any more drama into her life.

If I were by myself, it would be different.

[deja true]

"click, click" theres no place like woman hood, theres no place like womanhood"

OMG!! Suze, I just posted that quote as a new thread topic,asking GG's to tell us how they felt about the paragraph that it's from. I feel the same as you and am really sad when I see how many present themselves to the world, especially in suburban malls.

More exposure for CD's in the real world might actually become another "women's consciousness raising" effort in the real world. Many of us may be dressing to create the ideal woman for ourselves that we haven't been able to find out there.

The mods may move it to the SO's section, I guess. But I can't wait to come back after work to check it.

respect & love

deja

[Alison Anderson]

Even the heading "Would" you really want to be a woman, begs the the question "if?"
Perhaps if Salandra had asked: "Do" you you really want yo be a woman", I would likely say No! I am happy within myself as the person I am as the product of life experienced 99.9% as male so far, even the bad times, makes me who I am now. Luckily, I have not had the kind of personal tragedies one would go back in time for to change.:sad:

After that confusing mind bend,,,(here`s another:D) I would not like a sex change and go through all the turmoil connected but I WOULD like to be a shape shifter and be able to change sex to a beautiful woman for a time and live two lives. I cant imagine losing the male side of my life completely. Nor would I like to be keeping a secret life from my loving wife and family. (if I had one) More like, I would like to be able to switch to an alternate universe where time would not lapse between the two (and a gap where I could get some sleep) ( though I think you would go eventually insane!)

As a woman, I might be a powerfull, independant, single woman, forget all the "caring for family- doing the dishes" stuff in this world of aquality, as the editor of a leading womens magazine. or Just a simple single "out on the town girl" with just enough money to indulge in all the best fasions and acsessories in my middle class town.
Or perhaps I would be a porn star! But the most famous porn star in the world!

I hope noone does mind these flights of fancy but we do excist in the world of illusion!

Too many glasses of port?

Lots of innebreated love,

Alison XXX!
A

[Kieroney]

I have thought about that question for many of years, I have pictured what I wanted to look like, and for a everyday thing as a woman no, but to just try it for a week, I could do that.

[Sapphire]

In ways crossdressers enjoy the best of both worlds. While sometimes I am tempted to think that it would have been better if I had been born female the fact of the matter is that I will never know what it is actually like to be a woman. However I do know what it is like to be a crossdresser, and now that I have finally come to terms with my crossdressing life has become that much richer.

[teresa jeen]

yes i would rather be a woman. i was raised am man and will always be a man but i can feel being a woman , if that makes sense. i observe them with awe, revere them with respect, i would want to be , yes i would! they have their physical issues as do we all. none are better or worse than the others. some dont go away some get worse with age.but, yes i would.also some go away with age as others get worse for some. yes i would.

[Kate Simmons]

For a couple of years there, when I first came "out", I was really into "IT" and felt like my feelings were becoming unbalanced in sort of a female way, so actually had to "gear down" a bit to feel comfortable. This is why I know just how powerful these feelings can be and the old saying that you want something so bad you can "taste" it applied.

There is no doubt in my mind I could have followed through and seen this transition process to conclusion, including possibly physical transition. What I eventually realized though is that I would never be satisfied with being JUST a woman. To truely be myself, I had to combine the feelings to be a whole and complete person and so what I was physically didn't really matter that much any more. So,in essence, I am a man, yes, but am also a "woman" in many ways and can perform both roles with equal ease. Sometimes you more or less have to "live it" to find out what your capabilities really are.:happy:

[Lidia_tv]

Well, Salandra, some of us do the chores (the shopping, groceries, washing, ironing) anyway - particularly if we live alone. So, being a woman on top of it would not change all that much for me in that department. It's all about accepting things, like accepting the fact that we crossdress.

Here's a thought for all:
- for a while I lived with a GG. There are many reasons that caused us to split, but to say some: she was a control freak, and very conservative person who could never come to terms with crossdressing - she ridiculed CDs whenever the topic came up or she saw them on TV. That's why I had to be very careful, and eventually, that was one of the main reasons why we split. But: she admitted that when it came to ironing and generally care for clothes, particularly the most delicate ones - I knew more, and was better than she was. So, after a day full of chores, sometimes the fulfillment of seeing them well done makes me feel more of a woman then the dress I'm wearing at that moment.

[Kate Simmons]

Hi Lidia, Many people who have the need to "control" everything basically have a lack of self assurance and get upset when things don't go according to plan or don't fit into their own particular "world". I prefer spontaneity myself. Not only does it "spice" things up a bit but sometimes inspires my creativity. This is why I prefer being a "person" rather than necessarily being either a "man" or a "woman" and it doesn't lock me in to what assuming either of those roles implies.:happy:

[Lidia_tv]

I agree with you on that one, a PERSON first, everything else afterwards.

[Anna the Dub]

Think about it. Would you be female if you didn't have all the female clothes, makeup, and jewelry?

In a heartbeat. To me the clothes are not really important. Oh I like nice things, who doesn't? But only in the right context, like a big night out. But they are just clothes, a useful tool to portray to the world how I feel inside. When I transition, I will quite happily just throw on a pair of jeans and a top for everyday, with little or no make up. That stuff is not important.

[Mary Jane1]

I've thought abought this a lot and I know I'd like to be a woman. Not because of clothes, shopping etc. But for the sheer joy of expressing my femininity and knowing and developing the inner woman and all that entails. The emotional, spiritual, compassionate and loving woman is amazing in my opinion. I envy her and would love to be her.


Yes I want to be a woman, I know it is not all roses, but I would be the woman that I was meant to be. :love:
I agree Vivianann. I agree, I agree, I agree.

[MJ]

=Bre Rue;1150411]I have had this discussion with my wife recently...
I have thought long and hard and know in my heart that if we had never met I most likely would have transitioned long ago.

Now I would have loved to be born a girl, actually when I was little I always wished for it!
So now here I sit, A place between hurting the one person I love the most and my own happiness. Overall I am a pretty upbeat and happy person, even with hiding my secret. I could realistically keep hiding it the rest of my life and be OK. Although I would never be whole.

So, here we are.....At the crossroads of life.

Good question Sal ;)

if the one i loved could except my cding i would be in bre's heels right now but sad to say she did not. and i chose the path to transition .
funny how one does not know how good you got it until it's gone


Hardly a problem for just women :2c:[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE]=dianarg;1151256]yeah, but it gets much tougher if your a TS.

preach it sister

[KandisTX]

In all honesty, I can say NO, I would not want to be a woman. I would lose too much in my life that matters to me. So, for me, I'll stick with being a man that just happens to be a crossdresser.

Kandis:love:

[RobertaFermina]

Salandra,

It is a choice.

I have not fully confronted and broken through all my barriers in becoming the *man* I want to be, and savoring the fruits of manhood.

When I'm satisfied that I have "been there, done that, ticked it off!", then I could take a turn at being a woman.

Perhaps in the next lifetime?

It is not about preference, it is about expanding my consciousness.

Why leave manhood half-done, to move on to womanhood when I have no overwhelmingly compelling reason to do so?

As for TS's, I concede that overwhelmingly compelling reasons do drive them to take that turn, and make it work.

:rose: Roberta :rose:

[britney]

i would love to. there are so many things i would do. I will say, i would want to retain my male memories. As a female who knows the ins and outs of the male mind, you could take over the world

[Nicki B]

There is no doubt in my mind I could have followed through and seen this transition process to conclusion, including possibly physical transition.

I answered this question, for myself, very soon after I came out... I looked at all things my female friends suffered (periods, PMT, glass ceilings, etc) and asked myself why I would want that? :hmmm:

I've found my place sitting happily on the fence, with, for me, the best of both worlds...



i would love to. there are so many things i would do. I will say, i would want to retain my male memories. As a female who knows the ins and outs of the male mind, you could take over the world

A friend of mine, who has transitioned, works as a life coach, teaching women how to succeed in a male business world? :)

Use the advantages you have been given (just remember to think of them as advantages)?

[Jena11]

Well, the answer for me has always been yes, but I was afraid to admit it. I wish I knew 30 years ago what I know now, my life would have been different. I was even scared a few years back when I started the laser hair removal but I then knew that I had to move forward, Things keep chaning and some things are much easier for me now. I am going to be starting hormones this week and am looking forward to my journey, I am sure that things will not always be easy or could be very difficult but if I made it this far in life being unhappy with living the lie of life living like a guy. I can make it through this journey to find some happiness for myself. It took so long to say that I was a cross dresser and now I have learned that I really only feel that I am cross dressing when I wear mens clothes. :o

[annekathleen]

I think there is a fine line between reality and fantasy.
In reality, we are all males.
In fantasy, we might want to be a female.
We are all in different stages of crossdressing.
I dont think I will ever really want to be a female.
Maybe, some of you do, and I respect that.
I think problems arise when we can no longer accept ourselves as male,
and try to live as women, and some of us make some very pretty women.
But a little bit of reality here, we are gentically male.

[Clarissa]

Even though im a full time crossdresser, i still love my **** and how its always awake before I wake up. lol.

[Echo Logical]

I am glad in a great many ways that I was not born female. There are Physiological reasons, cultural reasons, and personal psychological reasons as well.

Physiological reasons: Female Puberty, PMS, Menopause. I have an older sister who was so afflicted at puberty that she would at times cry herself to sleep at night because of the pain in her newly forming breasts. I have known a number of women who, for extended periods of time in their lives had periods so disruptive that they literally could not function. My sister for one, would at times be sick in bed for a solid week from the cramping and nausea. My mother during menopause had mood swings so violent that she sometimes thought she had gone completely insane, and sometimes we did too.

My wife is going through menopause right now, and she is having a rough time with it. There are changes in hormone levels, the changes in her skin, her hair, her emotions, her sex-drive, and more. It really gets to her, has her questioning her femininity. She is sometimes ill, can't sleep, night sweats and "Power Surges". As strong as I am, I am not certain that I could weather that storm personally, it is hard enough having to watch a person you love go through it. I have empathy and compassion, but know that I will never truly understand what it is like to go through it.

These reasons alone are enough to make me glad I was born a man.

There are cultural reasons: As much as we might try to pretend, this culture is far from experiencing anything like true equality of gender. Sure women can work too,but as a man I know that I will likely make more than equally qualified women working the same job.

There is also a disparity of authority, I have often been given more deference and respect over equally and even greater qualified women, merely because I am a man. While in a study group for a philosophy class I was amazed at how often people would ignore the answers given by a friend of mine merely because she was a woman. As an experiment I began repeating nearly word for word what she had said often moments before, and people would think I was brilliant for how well I understood the material. My friend was intelligent, articulate, and a deep thinker yet people seemed to believe that she couldn't possibly know what she was talking about because she was a girl. The truly amazing thing is that it was both men and women who treated her this way.

You will notice too that if a man is assertive then he is confident, secure, strong, and a good leader. If a woman is assertive then she is often considered a bitch. How is that equal?

Lets look at other unequal things; It is much easier to be an ugly man than to be an ugly woman, far more so than men, a woman is judged on everything based on clues of her appearance. Men who like sex are seen as studs, women who like sex are seen as ****s. The list goes on and on, and at every turn stacks the deck against women. I can go to war, fight terrorists, face IED's and rockets, yet I wonder if I have the fortitude to face the daily injustices that my wife, sister, female friends face over and over again all their lives.

While todays society sets quite a few ridiculous expectations on both genders, I think I would choose those faced by men over those faced by women.

Even if I were to go and get total SRS tomorrow, it would still be primarily a physical change, it would not suddenly mean that I felt to my core what it is truly like to be a woman from birth, to have dealt with all of the injustices, expectations, and physical issues that being born and growing up female bring.

I also have very personal reasons: I just plain like being male, and I like being the particular person that I am. Yes I have wondered what it would like to have been born a woman and have come to believe that I am very glad I was born a male. I may never look as good as a VS Model in thigh high patent leather boots, but wearing them will still make me feel good, and all without ever having felt bloated from a period. I know that there are many wonderful things about being female, it isnt all negative. I also know that there are some negative things about being a guy, it isn't all boxer shorts and beer. I am simply glad that I am male, I am also glad to have found that there are a whole bunch of other guys who like dressing in female things, as individual as we may want to be, it sucks being alone.

[Carly D.]

I think all crossdressers would like to try out being the opposite sex for a while.. and I have fantisized about what that would be like, but in reality I like to be a guy and crossdress..

[LisaLedoux]

In an instant, including pregnancy. However I was born with an XY genotype and now I am too old to consider surgery. I guess I have fall back on the old unattainable wish of waking up one morning as a biological woman...which I am mentally anyway...so I will live my life enjoying the time I can spend as Lisa however infrequent those times are.

[jessicacd43]

Yes!!! In a hearbeat or second or less forever!!!
Hugs
Jessica

[Kayla_Gurl]

The simple answer is yes. The more complex answer is maybe. I don't really know what it is like to walk in a woman's shoes. (well literally, yes, but figuratively, no)

[shauna 9]

At this time in my life, I would not want to become a woman.

[Alex!]

Not in a million years. I love women, but not that much :)

[jessicacn74]

yes a millon times yes i want to be a woman i would love to be jessica on a permint bases because i have been living as jessica for years but i want to be her on a perment bases..................:hugs: jessica e. rains

[Laurelanne]

When I was very young I read about Christine Jorgenson and I wanted to do it too, then I realized that being a boy wasn't ALL that bad...however now that all this time has passed... I WOULD have preferred to be born a girl.
(PS I probably would hate my period tho?:eek:)

[Billie Jean]

For about a week would satisfy my couriosity.

[shenangovalleygal]

thought has crossed my mind but i would never get srs. ive already had 2 sharp objects at my crotch, dont want anymore. 1st was when i was just a very little kid. i was in the hospital getting corrective surgery for my birth defect 'hypospadias' a condition where the urethra (pee tube) doesnt reach the tip of the penis. i still have the scars on its underside. the 2nd was at my one cousins house, playing fetch with his dog. i made the dog thinki threw the stick when i got its attention showing that i still had it, he cam eup to me and placed one paw on my thigh and the other on my left testicle. the next day my crotch started to hurt. i had trouble walking, sitting, etc... so i headed to urologist and told me that the dog made the testicle 3x bigger. i even had an ultrasound performed on my privates. now that was an experience, i thought the ladies who performed it were going to laugh at the size on my cycloptic friend.

if i do decide i would get implants and tell people thjat i have gynecomastia and they should mind their own business.

[Perrinielle]

All right... nice item to come across when not feeling absolutely sure about you're doing... :rolleyes:

I was absolutely sure I wanted to become a woman for a long time. But I have been in bed the last couple of days (flu) and I really started thinking 'what the hell are you doing?' My goal is still clear (at least I think) and that is that I want to become 100&#37; female. But I have to be honest with you I am starting to doubt it. So now I'm feeling like I missed a passing or so.

Perhaps the question 'what do you do if you make up your mind?' should be added...

thanks for this great post guys, I have been reading on this forums for the last couple of days and it has meant the world to me.

Leanne

[Daintre]

" Would I really want to be a woman "

A one word answer would be Yes.

This is something that has been in my heart for over 25 years. Back then, the process of becoming a woman was not talked about. I read the Christean Jorgenson story and saw the movie several times. Life throws all kinds of adversity at you and dealing with it can change your dreams. Not to go into it, if I could, I would but I cannot....what I can do is live my life as a TG without SRS, and that is as close as I can come.

[Julie York]

Not in a million years. I love women, but not that much :)

That made me laugh.

My sentiments. It's ok if you could be stuck at 'gorgeous' forever but they fall apart you know when they get older. No six inch heels or any of that stuff.

At least when you fall apart as a guy it is sort of expected of you.:D

:thumbsup:

[Sophie_C]

Provided that it would not have the negative consequences it has now (losing any chance of a good job FOR LIFE, losing most family and friends and being left in the dust, scorned by the public consistantly), sure, i'd do it.

All of the little 'issues' people talk about are just like any issues you get in life. You get used to it and deal with it. Waking up earlier each day to put on your face or shaving your legs just becomes part of your routine. There are things to help dealing with periods.

Not to mention, if it really comes to my day-to-day presentation, i'm fully aware that i'm just modifying what i'd normally be wearing if I was a woman to the male world. Colors, patterns, styles, they're all just modified to be 'male' so I can properly function in society.

Cliche, as it sounds, I know I really 'am' a woman (as the best way you can describe gender roles), just working the situation as it is.

So, we're just not there yet. Maybe in 20 years, fine, but who knows where any of us will be then.

[laceyjessica]

Definitely would love to be a woman full time 24/7

[bianncats]

absolutely..I just love the clothes they get to choose from depending on their mood. we have pants or shorts, tees polos or button down shirts. flats or flats:thumbsdn:

[sarahred]

I wouldn't want to really be a woman, I enjoy my masculine side too. That big said though, it would be fun to have a righteous set of real boobs!!

[QZ2]

I don't want to be a woman, I just want to play at being a woman. It really is a lot of fun but being able to be either M or F anytime I want is also fun.

[kellyann2012]

So many responses, where to start? Let's see I already cook, clean, take care of the kids, attend kids school functions, do laundry, dishes, work a full time job, go to college part time, take care of the sick and elderly in the family, shop, plan and balance the checkbook. The other day my teenage daughter told me that in my other life I was a girl. With all this being said, I think adding periods, PMS, child birth, discrimination, and sexual harassment would make a full time woman out of me. The only thing I don't do now is dress 24/7. Thanks for the question, it really puts things in perspective.

[Jessicainme]

If I was around 20 to 30 I would say yes.

[Amy Hepker]

Yes, If I can find a good job and be who I am inside. That is a dream come true and what I am working toward, being a womwn 24/7.

[Linda C]

Yup - sometimes :o

[jessielee]

this thread really impressed me while still lurking in january. your candor and your examination of true intent, ladies, told me this forum is for real people, not pie in the sky.
yes, on the surface, it would be too easy to say, "piece of cake 24/7, girlgon take me away!" that is my honest desire. my gut reaction.
and yet.
many of your responses back then made me think.
just now, i came from town hall where an ordinance the county historic preservation board (which i'm honored to chair)sponsors is being worked out with the town council. in fantasy land, i'm admiring the smart boots and skirt the town attorney who drafted our bill is wearing. but in the real world, i reflect i have invested so much in this community. if i were in chambers in dress, i would have no contribution. small town, they all know me. fantasy vs. particiation in the real world i have helped shape.
also and foremost, i have built a beautiful family whom i adore and have created a place in this world and environ.
i would not take it back.
another time, i mean to post on my passive desire to have outside forces magically transform me, all with no doing on my own part, no consequence for having my selfish way. for my way is undeniably to be female, despite the warnings that its more work than i might imagine. it is my dream.
and then again, here is my life.
so i remain closeted.
such a big chicken.
but without a time machine, which would mean undoing precious lives i just admitted i could never wish to see undone, to be made as if they were not, my sober choice is no, sorry, i could not and will not.
thanks for making me think.
i'll flit around the e-room as a butterfly another day.
for this day i will give thanks for what i don't understand and don't appreciate.
blessings, ladies, blessings,
jessie

[Kate Simmons]

Well Jessie, having done it to the best extent possible for me, I'm quite satisfied and I do believe I would be up for the task. However, if that particular genetic combination at conception happened to be XX rather than XY, it wouldn't have been me here writing this, so I've come to the conclusion we are exactly who we are supposed to be, plumbing notwithstanding. The ball is in our court though and we are only limited by our imagination and our resources as to how to proceed and being true to ourselves is the bottom line.:)

[NicoleScott]

No, I can't afford the decrease in income. Seriously, no. I'm just very happy too play one, every chance I get.

[jessielee]

You will notice too that if a man is assertive then he is confident, secure, strong, and a good leader. If a woman is assertive then she is often considered a bitch. How is that equal?

jessie teasches me its okay to be soft. i do not imply that women are or should be "weaker" or less assertive than males. but that i was and am.
sure, courageous and driven towards a task, like climbing as mountain. but too soft to be a "man."
when i knew i was a girl, years ago, i accepted it was okay to be gentle and caring and emotional.
but was still "wrong" all my life.
someone to be fixed
or at least nagged at.
well we know better now. but the damage had been done.
and, figuring it could be the end of the dressing road, since it leads to nowhere but fantasy, for me, i was depressed; am i only good for hiding under rocks, skulking in the darkness? that was last night.
today by the light of living sisters is it as emerging from under, from the dark
into the light of a new day of self acceptance and forgiveness and expression
and love to each of you.
my friends,
jessie

[Carol123]

If I was younger and could give birth,yes

[Mary Morgan]

I love the idea of being a woman and I am inclined to say that I would rush at the chance, but I have some concerns that we are the product of our environment as much as our genes, and I really don't know if would trade all the unfair advantages men have for all the disadvantages women suffer from men. In my fantasy world I am a woman with none of the cares about real world issues except my weight, my height, my wrinkles, and my relationships. I wish we lived in a time and place where we respected each other and celebrated our differences, but then if we did, we would all be content to be who and what we are. And I would be content to be a crossdressing transgender. The circle is now complete, or is it?

[avery99]

this question certainly would have a variety of possible responses, most probably revolving around true gender identity. but you asked for us to answer personally.

thus, i guess sometimes i'd like to be a woman and sometimes a man, but in some search for peace my own path has been to take the qualities i love in both feminine and masculine qualities and integrate them into a unique individual...somebody that is true to their own nature while also having much to offer outwards. it's not all about me.

[Claire3]

Im quite happy to compromise.However it would be nice for Claire to be a real woman when dressed.Never mind,life goes on.:love:XXX

[paulaluvssz8]

A real woman for a day or maybe a week but not for good. I still love the man I am.

[vivianann]

I have answered I would love to be a woman earlier in this thread, I have read the posts since then, and I want to add my thoughts, I know it is not glamorous to be female and I considered all the things women go through, ie menstruel pain, bearing children, and rearing children, etc. etc.. it is not glamorous to be female, however with that said, I would still want to be a female.

[KimberlyS]

I am just a guy with a mix of male and femme attributes, traits and physical characteristics. Just a guy in a skirt here no matter how feminine I look or feel.

[Chryl]

No...I like being a guy, being able wake up and be out and about in minutes...but I think I will enjoy playing gurl, so far I have.

Cheryl

[KathrynCleve]

In my mind and my heart, I am a woman and I love it.

[Edyta_C]

There was a time in my life where I might have said yes. Of course I would not have been the " girl of my dreams" and that probably would have hurt. My mother always wanted me to be a girl and was happy with me, but would have been ecstatic to have had a girl. So now at this point in my life and am very happy to switch back and forth (and keep my wife and kids).

Hugs Edyta

[VeronicaH]

Isn't that what CD'ing is all about for most of us? How many of you want to pass? If you were a woman you would.

[RockerTerri]

Yes. God, hear me please, YES.

This is probably one of the things that works against unity in the CD/TS community. Some of us like to dress up, primp up, and go live and love and party as our alter-egos, and then when the fun is over, go back to living as Bob or Tina or whoever. And i admire and envy them.

For others, it isnt at all about the clothes or makeup or how pretty we wish we were. Truly, yes, having a 36-24-36 body, being 5'6 and 120 pounds would be a dream come true....for us, and many GGs as well. Gender identity is MUCH deeper than clothes, or hair, or love or how we decorate our house. It is far more an internal process than an external one.

For me, it isnt about pretty dresses and being more "caring and nurturing" than i am now. I can be caring and nurturing as a man, and no one thinks twice about it. Its about self identity, about how we want the world to see us and react to us, for well or ill. Being a "real" woman isnt perfect, but being a "real" man is? Ever pass a kidney stone? How about mowing the lawn, how many of you like doing that when its 96 degrees and so humid and muggy that you can see the air? I just left a job that permitted long hair and earrings and shorts....if you were a woman. How about prostate cancer? Hair in your ears, nose, everywhere but on your head?

I would give anything to truly be a woman, a gg from birth. Lower wages, pain in puberty, every 28 days thereafter, childbirth and all. I would be free to wear what i want, be who i want, express myself however i damn well please, and no one would question it. Women face some serious social issues every day....but so do men. The grass is not greener on either side of the fence, but it dosent mean we cant prefer a side.

I could care less if after transition a sudden social-cultural revolution took place that allowed men to dress as women do now, and relegated women to boring ol' guy clothes. Being a man or a woman is a whole lot more than just what clothes you wear.

As for being fat, with greasy hair and bad teeth, that is something you allow to happen to yourself, society dosent force that upon you. A fat, bad toothed greasy haired man is any less of a social pariah? You can excersize, wash, brush your teeth, see your doctor. Thats like saying "what if you had lung cancer?" and failing to mention the person with the malady smoked for 20 years. I see lots of women daily who dont fit the barbie doll dimensions. I dont think they are lesser women than the lucky few who do.

Might be more interesting if someone started a topic that was "what does being a woman mean to you?" than just "would you if you could?". Not saying this is a bad thread at all, there have been some awesome responses in here. But for a lot of us, this is a pretty deep issue.

Terri

[Stormgirl]

Now that I think about it,I really don't think that I'd enjoy being a woman.

[RachelSue6]

A good question – and some thought provoking answers!

If it was just me, in isolation, then yes. After all, a woman can do just about any of the things a man can do these days – dig the garden, climb mountains, paddle a kayak, play a violin – you name it and there are women doing it. Being a woman isn’t about getting dressed to the nines every day, though that can be fun. What I like is just to go about the world doing ordinary things – but as a woman, and get treated as a woman. For example, today I went to take some photos of the town I lived in as a small child, and I went dressed as an “every day” woman and had a wonderful day. Nobody took any notice of me, except one man who saw me taking lots of photos and wanted to know if I was a council official. When I explained he was all smiles and couldn’t have been nicer. Have you noticed how people are more friendly towards a woman? Particularly if you smile at them? I guess women are less threatening than men.

So if it was just me in isolation, yes is the answer.

But it isn’t, of course. In the real world you have other people to think about – wives, partners, children, friends. I’ve been married for nearly 40 years to a wonderful lady who knows about the odd things I get up to and doesn’t turn a hair. If I said I wanted to have a sex change op I’m sure she’d rise to the challenge. But she wouldn’t like it. She’d be deeply worried about all the social implications, and it would be unfair to impose all the stress on her for my own selfish gratification. And then there are the children – and now the grandchildren. The children are old enough and sufficiently wordly wise now to cope, but in their teen years they weren’t – it’s hard enough getting used to your own sexuality without getting confusing messages from your dad – so we’ve never told them. Probably most of the people who matter would accept the change in me, but at my time of life (62) the network of people we know is huge and the explaining would go on for ever!
I don’t actually resent being the male me. Most of the time I don’t think about it. It must be different for some people – read Jan Morris’s book “Conundrum” for an insight into someone who was really obsessed with being the wrong sex. I’m not like that – luckily!

So the “real world” answer is no.

Thanks for asking, and making me think about it!

Love,

Rachel

[Karren H]

Hell NO!!! Women work too hard... and it's expected... Men have it easy... very low expectations I figure.... A women works thier ass;s off but if a son makes his bed they throw him a parade and buy him a new car... lol

Crossdressing is the best of both worlds.... imho.... Ya can get all prettied up when you want to.... ya don't HAVE to do it every day.... and when the real work commences you can slip back into guy mode and plead ignorance!!! hehehe

and Klinger thought he had a dodge ..............

[Joanne f]

Most of the time i would say that i do not seam to have a conscious thought of wanting to be any gender in particular as when i am doing things my mind is usually on that, but when i get time to dress and relaxes a bit i think that your mind starts to think in the mode that you are dressing in , so yes at those times i would say that i do want to be a woman, whether it is my mind playing tricks on me or whether it is simply that i am more relaxed i do not know or even an age type thing as in less male hormones (maybe i did not have many to start with):D again i don`t know .
But to make things worse i went shopping with my wife yesterday so that meant i ended up going into a lot of female clothes shops (oh how hard that was for me):devil: had to be dragged all the way (out) but i could not stop thinking about how much i wanted to be a woman and wear all those lovely clothes and to add insult to injury i am still feeling like it , have i finally lost it of course it doe`s not help being summer, (that's it been out in the sun to long) must put some thing cool on (a dress) god there is no escaping this madness.



joanne :heehee:

[Amanda0208]

To be honest - Not a chance. It takes Amanda easilly an hour and a half to get ready everyday. The burdens of child rearing and running a household are just incredible. As men we take so much for granted. I have taken over a good deal of the daily household stuff from my wife and it really is damn impossible to keep up. I don't know how she did it with my limited help for so long. And thats just one aspect. So while I enjoy dressing as a women and trying to be the best I can be, I think I will stay a man.

of course if I could do it for just a week or two:)

[JackieS]

I think there are two questions here. The first is, would you become a woman now if you could, the second is would you have preferred to be born a woman. Very different questions. The second one is where you get into the PMS, child-bearing etc. For the first, you can take all of this off the table, because becoming a woman at this point would not involve any of this.

Since I can't go back and change history, I am going to go with question 1. Would I want to become a woman now. I have given this a lot of thought and my house mate, Melissa, and I have talked about it quite a bit over the past couple of months. I don't cross dress for the clothes. Don't get me wrong, I love the clothes, but that is not the main reason. The main reason is because I feel more natural as Jackie than I do as Gord. Being feminine is not something I turn off when I dress in male mode. Sure, I suppress some of it, but my way of thinking and my view of the world is more Jackie than anything else. There is nothing I do as a male that I couldn't do as a female, that I want to do. All that being said, I have to think about who would be affected by my transition. Certainly, my daughter, my parents and siblings would be. Could they adjust, maybe. Do I want to put them through that, I am not sure. The longest I have spent totally en femme is 4 days. I felt completely comfortable and never once wished I could be back in male mode. So, I know I could do it. I don't think I ever will, though. I intend to become more feminine, I am even thinking of hormones. Hair removal started last year and there are a few other things I would like to do, but the idea of surgery gives me the willies.

Will I live 24/7 as a female, probably, will I become a woman, no, but not because I love being a man, but because I don't hate being one.