How supportive is your world?

[bi_weird]

I was thinking the other day, about how different my haircut would have been if I was still in Michigan. There I have a number of non-straight friends who, while not actually being trans, get gender issues much better than straight people. They also understand a lot more why I am the way I am. Here...everyone's straight and no one quite gets it; they just let it slide 'cause they don't understand. So it was more lonely to get my hair cut, and yet more uniquely me, something that I did because I wanted to and did for myself.
So I was wondering, how supportive is your life, and do you think it affects your transition? Are your friends mostly some type (or many types) of queer, or mostly straight? Any queer family members? And do these people accept you more because of their own identities or not? How do you think this shapes your trans experience?

[Kieron Andrew]

95% of my friend/support base is Trans in one way or another

[Christina Louise]

I have no family and only know a few people to chat with down the pub. Therefore any decisions are down to me, which means having to face any consequences all by myself. Of course this site does provide wonderful support but it's not the same as having someone there in person.

[SirTrey]

Most of My friends are trans...My family is getting used to it, but some are not so thrilled....but they have to live with it...My partner, Toni, is SUPER supportive....so, overall, I am VERY lucky! And I DO believe that affects your transition greatly....Transition is the time you NEED the support the most...Best thing to happen to Me for a while...I got a Christmas card from My oldest and dearest friend, Debbie...We have been friends since fourth grade, we were ten...So 38 year friendship...The card said, "To My favorite brother"....:) I will keep it forever! She said to Me at Christmas time, "Well, I always wanted a brother"...:) Now THAT is acceptance! So, I like My world, and overall, I find it to be a pretty friendly place.....**Trey**

[Adam]

none of the people in real life i talk to are trans or gay not one but lucky for me there all suppotive they may ask silly questions time to time but there all cool :D

[ZenFrost]

My immediate family is really supportive, and my father's side is pretty good. (My mother's side, not so much.) None of my friends are really LGBT and some of them seem cool with it. But where I live in general, people are really against LGBT stuff.

[Cai]

Depends on how you count my world. Most of my family doesn't know, and while my dad knows, I'm not sure he's really dealt with it.
But my friends either know, suspect, or don't care. Here at school, I'm pretty free to do what I want, and people don't argue. (it's been really nice this week to get up in the morning and decide my clothes based on what I want to wear, instead of who I'm going to see that day) My roommate is amazing, completely supportive and understanding. I have a fair number of lesbian friends, and two other people at school that I highly suspect are trans. So I'm pretty comfortable here.

[Felix]

Good question!! Well I can't tell my parents it would kill them. As for friends well my gay male friends seem to understand more. I thought my ex understood but turns out I was right and she didn't. I have a close transman friend who I have known 5-6 years he does fully understand. I have a couple of lesbian friends but don't know how much they understand but they are there and one in particular is especially there for me. I can't tell the rest of my family they wouldn't understand. I have lots of support from all you my friends in here and that means a lot. I have a couple of straight friends who are very accepting which is great xx Felix :hugs::hugs:

[TeaPirateFox]

I don't have much family besides my grandparents and a couple cousins on the West Coast. But their all lovingly supportive actually. My grandma PREFERS me being male. I actually got quite lucky and blessed in that way.

As for friends, they've just accepted it. Its who I am. But I have alot of outcast friends to who understand the discriminations of being different (Gay, Lesbian, Bi, Trans, Crossdressers, hell, even a few that just dress differently).

And then this lovely group here.

So I got lucky. I've got all the support I need in the world.

Truly blessed.

And its probably why I try to be as supportive and giving to others as I can.

[Sares]

No one in my family and none of my friends know that I don't feel like I'm 100% girl, but I know that at least some of them -- especially my parents -- suspect. My sister actually seems to get it. We'll be shopping for sweaters at J. Crew (which is the one store we both love), and my sister will hold up something in a more masculine style and say "You should try this on -- this is your style." She knows what I like and what I can't stand to wear. I don't believe that she thinks about me as being androgynous or boyish. She just thinks of me as me.

I have a lot of gay male friends. I do live in NYC, after all. But I don't really think of them as a source of support, because I think they're just as oblivious as everyone else, even though I pretty much dress like them. :blush: They also unknowingly complicate everything, as I've fallen for over half of them at some time or another. Sigh! But I do think that being not-100%-girl and straight-but-not-straight has allowed me to be even more supportive of them, which is a plus.

I don't know that I will ever explain my feelings to my family. I think it would just upset them and it isn't necessary. I can go on being a girl at work and at family functions and be perfectly fine, because I don't mind being part girl. I'm more likely to eventually talk about this sort of thing with my friends and my sister, who might not understand but also wouldn't create any drama. In the meantime, I'll just go on doing my thing. Sometimes I feel like the only genetic female in this city who doesn't wear skirts and boots and carry a huge purse, but that's just my perception, and the truth is that I don't stand out from the crowd of eight million.

[Taylor105]

Support. Well, I have more support than I thought I was going to have. I don't have any real life trans friends yet but I am going to be meeting a lady and her wife at a restaurant this coming up Sunday. She is a pre-op trans woman. But she has been on hormones for three years. I'm really excited about meeting her! Friends have been supportive for the most part. My family is a whole mish-mash of people who don't conform to the norm...whatever that is. lol On my dad's side he has a brother and a sister who are gay. My Aunt passed away from breast cancer a couple of years ago. It was really hard on the family. Then there is me. The lone trans person. At least so far. lol I have a cousin on my dad's side who is a lesbian. On my mom's side I have a male cousin who is gay. But he told me he has dated a trans woman before. So it's really a good thing to have a family like mine. The only person who is still having a really hard time with it is my sister. But I can totally understand her feelings. We grew up together 18 months apart and we slept in the same bed. Did all the sister things. Whispering into the night when we were yelled at several times to shut up and go to sleep. haha Just normal things growing up and my sister is afraid that if she embraces me as her brother it will be like saying our childhood and all of our memories as sister's are dead. That Shelly is dead. And I told her that my memories are all still there and I treasure them too. That I am the same person inside that I always was. I will let her come to terms with it in her own time. I have only been out to my family for two months. My mom is calling me Taylor. It's really cool actually. I was so afraid to out myself but as some of you remember, I was bullied into it. Blackmailed into it. And the overwhelming outpouring of love and acceptance was more than I could have ever hoped for. So yeah, I don't have any real life trans friends yet and wish I did. But things are pretty good mostly. I know I have more support than a lot of trans friends that I have met online.

[Tobie]

My family doesn't know, nor are they likely to ever know. My other has a hard time dealing with my other 'oddities', and I think telling her I'm part guy would do her in.

Some of my friends know, the ones who I trust to keep their traps shut as I don't want it made completely public knowledge. S/o is very accepting and loving, but he still has a hard time knowing when I'm more one or the other, let alone knowing when I sit as both.

[Leo Lane]

My mother suspects, but is very, very uncomfortable with the idea. I can't tell her, not now anyway.

I have two good and dear female friends who are far from being girly themselves and who, though I've never spoken to them about being transgendered, accept me without giving a damn about what I wear and how I act. One once said to me about a dance, "Why don't you come? You don't have to dress up all girly."

At school, uni, work, people haven't seemed and don't seem to care about my boyishness, but that's probably just because they don't really care about me; I'm shy and have unusual interests, and so find it difficult to make friends.

[Cai]

I have two good and dear female friends who are far from being girly themselves and who, though I've never spoken to them about being transgendered, accept me without giving a damn about what I wear and how I act. One once said to me about a dance, "Why don't you come? You don't have to dress up all girly."

I have similar friends. I wore a suit and tie to a "True Colors" dance, figuring that anyone who didn't know would just assume I was in costume or something. I told one of my friends, who I'm not out to, that I wished I could wear that outfit to a speech competition (I have to wear my girly suit). She goes "Well, why don't you?" :happy:

[Drake]

Yeah, I wish I could have wore a suit and tie at my prom. Instead I had to wear all this makeup and a dress and ugh.

I'm not out to any of my family but I pretty sure my sister suspects I'm into girls. She just doesn't know the whole story. I'm sure if I outed myself, my parents would be absolutely disgusted, both sides of the family too. I can only think of 2-3 people in my whole family that would be able to tolerate it.
(That's why I'm telling them when I move out of the house.)

I've told most of my friends. The ones I haven't told yet I'll get around to. (I've been pretty obvious around them so I don't have to "say" it) I'm sure they'll all be really supportive. I have great friends.