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Wickanne GG
01-25-2008, 05:27 PM
If you are simply a FTM CD, why do you name your male persona? {I can understand why TSs take a male name to complete the illusion or the transition.} Why would a heterosexual FTM CD find a need to take on a male name?

Pretty much everyone on the Internet has an alias to protect their privacy. If you have a ‘female’ name and you change it to a ‘male’ name to use, for example, on this forum, would you select a different ‘male’ name to protect the privacy of your first ‘male’ name?

How important is your ‘male’ name to you? Does it have a specific meaning to you or do you change it to suit your mood?

I asked similar questions in the MTF section.
(For exact question reference)
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=74038
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=74319

They have led to some interesting discussions, and debates, off the threads.

One of the things I like about this site is the diversity of answers…negative, positive, ambivalent…it’s all good. What provoked the questions was, more than once, someone has said, “We’ll have to give your ‘male persona’ a name.”…and other statements to that effect. I have never felt a need to distinguish between the two because I am blended into one. I am me whether designing/engineering or sewing a hemline…just facets of my personality. I am comfortable with who I am. Maybe it is because I grew up in a home where individuality was encouraged…I was definitely ahead of my time in that respect.

Now I am curious as to how the questions would be answered in the FMT section.

:love:
Wickanne

ZenFrost
01-25-2008, 06:57 PM
I think I'm going to take a stab at this even though I'm not CD.


If you are simply a FTM CD, why do you name your male persona?


Personally I'm not a CD. Most FtMs are not CD either, it's actually pretty rare. And I'd hardly call someone 'simply a CDer' because there tends to be more than just clothes involved. Not to say that all FtMs are transexuals, but even a woman who dresses like a man on occasion tends to have more to her gender than could be called 'simple' or just a persona. I know some prefer to take an androgynous name to use all the time, male or female.



{I can understand why TSs take a male name to complete the illusion or the transition.}


I'm not trying to get up in arms about that but calling it an illusion is somewhat offensive. I know you were borrowing someone's words from the other thread but for me, being female is the illusion. My male name doesn't complete an illusion, it shatters it. And I think most transexuals wouldn't call being their true selves an illusion. Being biologically female doesn't make me any less of a man, and I don't consider it to be an illusion to present as male at all. In fact it's more the truth than presenting as female ever was.



Why would a heterosexual FTM CD find a need to take on a male name?


Why does your question only address heterosexual FtM CDs, what about bisexual or homosexual ones? Or any other sexuality for that matter? I'm not sure I understand the need for the distinction here.



Pretty much everyone on the Internet has an alias to protect their privacy. If you have a ‘female’ name and you change it to a ‘male’ name to use, for example, on this forum, would you select a different ‘male’ name to protect the privacy of your first ‘male’ name?



I go by Zen on this forum (or at least that what most people call me here) and that isn't my male name. In real life I have a male name 24/7 and so do use it on the 'net where applicable. I tend to avoid using my full real name anywhere though for security.




How important is your ‘male’ name to you? Does it have a specific meaning to you or do you change it to suit your mood?


My name is important in the sense that it's my name. It's something for people to call me that I recognize and go by. I've been trying to legally change it for months but it's not easy where I live. The meaning isn't important, a name is just a name, but I prefer to be recognized for the man that I am so I never use my female name because it only furthers the illusion of what I'm not.

CaptLex
01-25-2008, 07:59 PM
Hi Wickanne:

You're right about the diversity here and I think you'll probably get different responses on this side of the fence.

I chose a male name way before I even realized that I'm TS. All I knew at that time is that I had a male side, and I thought he deserved his own name to identify him and differentiate from my female side. But my male name is a part of my whole name, so that's the significance of it for me. Male side or female side, it's all me - so my female name and male name are both part of my full real name.

And even though I'm in the process of transitioning, I'm not changing my full name (which causes some confusion, but I don't care). :tongue: But I live as a man full time now, so I have to explain to people that I prefer not to be called by my first name. Most people are okay with it once I explain it.

Like Zen, I'm also confused about the "hetero" question - what's the difference? :confused:

Wickanne GG
01-25-2008, 08:48 PM
....Personally I'm not a CD. Most FtMs are not CD either, it's actually pretty rare. And I'd hardly call someone 'simply a CDer' because there tends to be more than just clothes involved. Not to say that all FtMs are transexuals, but even a woman who dresses like a man on occasion tends to have more to her gender than could be called 'simple' or just a persona. I know some prefer to take an androgynous name to use all the time, male or female.

Then I suppose I would fall into the “rare” category, but experience has shown me that it is not as rare as some seem to think it is. Maybe forty-seven years of living as I have makes it “simple” for me. I don’t make it complicated, it just is. I don’t hide it, I don’t make excuses, I don’t apologies nor do I find a need to explain who I am. If someone else wants to make who I am complicated then that’s their choice.
I am not sure where you are getting “just a persona” from. “Just a persona” sounds very trivial, where as assuming a persona is anything but trivial.
I am curious…have you ever read Jungian psychology?


I'm not trying to get up in arms about that but calling it an illusion is somewhat offensive. I know you were borrowing someone's words from the other thread but for me, being female is the illusion. My male name doesn't complete an illusion, it shatters it. And I think most transexuals wouldn't call being their true selves an illusion. Being biologically female doesn't make me any less of a man, and I don't consider it to be an illusion to present as male at all. In fact it's more the truth than presenting as female ever was.

Where some see it as an illusion, others do not. That’s the wonderful thing about forums…so many opinions and not all of them agree. A wealth of knowledge can be harvested from forums.


Why does your question only address heterosexual FtM CDs, what about bisexual or homosexual ones? Or any other sexuality for that matter? I'm not sure I understand the need for the distinction here.

Why does my question have to be about bisexual or homosexual? Why can it not be just about heterosexual? Does one never wonder about the heterosexual side of the spectrum?


I go by Zen on this forum (or at least that what most people call me here) and that isn't my male name. In real life I have a male name 24/7 and so do use it on the 'net where applicable. I tend to avoid using my full real name anywhere though for security.

The question was never about full real names. Anyone out here should know enough to protect themselves for security/privacy reasons.


My name is important in the sense that it's my name. It's something for people to call me that I recognize and go by. I've been trying to legally change it for months but it's not easy where I live. The meaning isn't important, a name is just a name, but I prefer to be recognized for the man that I am so I never use my female name because it only furthers the illusion of what I'm not.

I am sorry to read that you are having a difficult time changing your name :(


CaptLex:....Like Zen, I'm also confused about the "hetero" question - what's the difference?

It's simple...curiosity. This is a forum, everyone is free to answer the thread.


You're right about the diversity here and I think you'll probably get different responses on this side of the fence....

I was looking forward to different responses...but I didn't assume anything.


:love:
Wickanne

CaptLex
01-26-2008, 12:39 AM
It's simple...curiosity. This is a forum, everyone is free to answer the thread.
Agreed, so maybe I misread your first post - are you asking for responses from hetero FtM CDs only? :raisedeyebrow:

TeaPirateFox
01-26-2008, 01:46 AM
It kind of sounds like you have your own idea Wickanne, and it doesn't really matter what we have to say.

No meaning to come off as rude, but that's the feeling Im' getting here.

Sares
01-26-2008, 03:33 AM
Yeah, I kind of get that impression, too, especially from this:


...more than once, someone has said, “We’ll have to give your ‘male persona’ a name.”…and other statements to that effect. I have never felt a need to distinguish between the two because I am blended into one. I am me whether designing/engineering or sewing a hemline…just facets of my personality. I am comfortable with who I am. Maybe it is because I grew up in a home where individuality was encouraged…I was definitely ahead of my time in that respect.

You are comfortable with not distinguishing between the two, because they are blended into one. Other people are comfortable making that distinction -- they're not "blended into one," as you are, but that non-blended-ness is a part of them and their male name reflects it. That's my response, in a nutshell.

TeaPirateFox
01-26-2008, 03:59 AM
Yeah, I kind of get that impression, too, especially from this:



You are comfortable with not distinguishing between the two, because they are blended into one. Other people are comfortable making that distinction -- they're not "blended into one," as you are, but that non-blended-ness is a part of them and their male name reflects it. That's my response, in a nutshell.

I prefer my male name, Maxik, to my female name because when Im' called that, people assume I'm a guy because its a harsher sounding name compared to my female name.


blended-ness

And just wanted to add, thats my new favourite word now XP

Sares
01-26-2008, 04:11 AM
Yeeahh, I make up words a lot. I aced the SAT vocabulary section, but I can never think of proper words when I actually have to use them to communicate, so I just stick -ness on the end of everything.

Wickanne GG
01-26-2008, 02:51 PM
Agreed, so maybe I misread your first post - are you asking for responses from hetero FtM CDs only? :raisedeyebrow:

No not at all, but, at this moment in time, that is were my curiosity is focused.


TeaPirateFox: It kind of sounds like you have your own idea Wickanne, and it doesn't really matter what we have to say.

And it kind of sounds like you're making an assumption about me. Not meaning to come off as rude, but that's the feeling Im' getting here. Just a thought...did it not cross your mind that had I had my own idea I wouldn't be asking a question?


Sares: ....Other people are comfortable making that distinction -- they're not "blended into one," as you are, but that non-blended-ness is a part of them and their male name reflects it. That's my response, in a nutshell.

What can I say other than...interesting response.

:love:
Wickanne

Felix
01-26-2008, 04:00 PM
My answer to this is that I have two sides my male side is stronger so I wanted a male name to represent my male persona some people call me by my female name and some by my male I have no problem with that as they are both parts of me that are intrinsically connected. Poeple who have never met me before I introduce myself as Felix because I feel more Felix than anything else.

I also do no feel that I am creating or living an illusion these are both real parts of me!! xx Felix :hugs:

CaptLex
01-26-2008, 06:59 PM
No not at all, but, at this moment in time, that is were my curiosity is focused.
Not to be dense, hon, but you lost me. Are you saying that your curiosity is about hetero FtM CDs, but you're okay with those of us that don't fit that description answering the thread? :confused:

Tamara Croft
01-26-2008, 07:08 PM
Not to be dense, hon, but you lost me. Are you saying that your curiosity is about hetero FtM CDs, but you're okay with those of us that don't fit that description answering the thread? :confused:I've been following this thread, and she did say we could post... and I'm must be as dense as you Lex, because I'm completely lost about this thread. I think going into a forum section and asking only about hetro FTM CD names is rude... I'm sorry, but it is...

TeaPirateFox
01-26-2008, 10:40 PM
I've been following this thread, and she did say we could post... and I'm must be as dense as you Lex, because I'm completely lost about this thread. I think going into a forum section and asking only about hetro FTM CD names is rude... I'm sorry, but it is...

Simply agreed. Feels like a bit of discimination.

Wickanne GG
01-27-2008, 10:30 AM
Since when does a forum take away MY right to as a specific question? Funny, I see threads on this site aim at…GG only question…MTF only question…for blah, blah, blah question. Does one feel “dense” when they come across those threads or do you think…okay, maybe the person has a reason to ask just this certain “demographic”. I cannot stop, nor do I wish to stop, anyone from answering which is why you don’t see “For Heterosexual MTF CD” in the thread subject line. Now that to me could be taken as “rude” or discriminatory but I just look at those “for” and “only” threads and don’t bother answering because they are asking a certain group for their own reasons.

But if anyone here knows of a site that is strictly “Heterosexual MTF CD” I will be more than happy to go to that site and ask the same question….No? I didn’t think so.

You can continue to make an issue where there is no issue, you can ignore the thread, or you can answer the thread...it is your choice in an open forum.

:love:
Wickanne

Felix
01-27-2008, 12:47 PM
Just wanted to say I think this thread is getting silly no disrespect but why don't we close it before it gets out of hand xx Felix :hugs:

Kieron Andrew
01-27-2008, 01:00 PM
Just wanted to say I think this thread is getting silly no disrespect but why don't we close it before it gets out of hand xx Felix :hugs:
Ditto i feel the same, Wickanne you specifically singled out FtM Hetro CD's you are gonna be hard pressed to find an FtM that covers ALL those bases, there might be one or two of us lurking here but thats it (for the record i dont cover ALL those bases)

Tamara Croft
01-27-2008, 01:02 PM
I think enough of our FTM members have been upset by this thread and with that, I'm closing it.

Those threads aimed at specific members, do not specifically state... oh and btw, only answer if you are hetro... do they? That is the problem with this thread...