Is CDing Your Comfort Zone Too?

[Jilmac]

I only just met my SO last October, but we have gotten to know each other quite well in a short time. We have been intimate on numerous occasions, and I also told her about my dressing shortly after we met. She still has a lot of personal conflict with my dressing, but she is also trying to understand my need to do it.

Last night we had a frank and open discussion about my dressing, and I told her of the many times I dressed during low periods in my life (starting with the death of a sister when I was 15). Then she said something that made the bulb light up. She said dressing was my comfort zone. All the years I have been dressing, feeling good while I did it, but not knowing why I felt good, was summed up in that one statement. I wish my first and second wives could have had that insight.

I have talked to counselors about my dressing, I've talked to clergy, therapists, discussion groups, etc. and don't recall any of these so-called professionals mention a comfort zone. I know I fully enjoy dressing and always will, and now I'm aware of one of the reasons it makes me feel good.

Now I'm wondering if any of you girls out there realize your comfort zone when you are dressed? If you have a story to go along with your comfort zone, feel free to tell it here. I'd love to hear some feedback from all you lovely ladies. Luv and :hugs: Jill

[StacyCD]

For many years I could not understand my need to dress. Only recently, with the help from this list and other on the WWW have I come to accept myself and my need to dress. What I've discovered is that I'm not sick or demented in any way, dressing just allows me to express a part of myself. As to dressing being in my comfort zone, I'm not sure if I'm there yet because although my SO knows, she has not seen me dressed. If/when that happens perhaps I will be in the 'zone.'

[Michelle-NC]

I have a high stress job, and CDing is an escape to a comfort zone for me. When I dress, I have no stress, only to be comfortable. My wife actually prefers for me to dress, as she can see the feminine influence and calming effect it has on me.

[barbara blue]

I have to agree with your gf. I can come home from work, shower, put on some comfy clothes,a wig, some perfume, and heels, take a deep breath and relax in font of the computer. It just feels good, ya know?
This forum has allowed me to feel so much better about myself.
thanks for the insite.
BB

[LACD]

Now that wife is accepting I find that I can really veg out. It is really good that we have something in common and I can really relax. Enjoy and have a ball.

[sissystephanie]

I have a high stress job, and CDing is an escape to a comfort zone for me. When I dress, I have no stress, only to be comfortable. My wife actually prefers for me to dress, as she can see the feminine influence and calming effect it has on me.

My late wife, who knew about my CD activites before we were married, was just like Michelle's wife. When she saw I was stressed about something, she would say, "let's get dressed and go out." That meant for me to get enfemme!

It definitely was, and still is, my confort zone. She passed away almost three years ago, and I now find myself as Stephanie more often than not. Without her makeup work and wig styling, I don't pass. However, if you have read many of my past posts, you know that I do go out in public frequently dressed enfemme. Not in dresses, and not real flamboyant. Just classic semi-dressy, sometimes a skirt and top or maybe a skort and top. I wear female shoes a good part of the time, since I have noticed that hardly anyone pays attention to your shoes. Unless, of course, you are wearing real high heels!

Put those pretty things on, and get in YOUR Comfort Zone!:happy:

Siss/Stephanie

Outwardly a girl, but there is a man under the silk and lace!

[docrobbysherry]

I've never tried it. But I imagine my CDing is similar to using heroin. It's addicting because of the incredible high I get.
If I want comfortable, I open a brewski and turn on a Lakers, Ducks, or Angels game. Maybe that's just me?
RS

[Aeslyn]

I'd have to say for me it is something different, but you could use the same name. I find girl's (and yes, i always use the term girl, i like that sound of the word more than women) clothing to be more comfortable than mens in many respects. Maybe not for some of my day to day activities cause i am definitely closeted. And certainly not for my usual recreational activities. Ever tried to sail a sloop in an evening dress and heels? But I find panties more comfortable then mens underwear. Both the cut and material. I never wear thongs or g-strings cause these are just plain uncomfortable. I do like the feel of a bra. And i love the feel of nightgowns and skirts hanging from my body or swishing around my legs. And don't even get me started on stockings.
As for a "comfort zone", I'd have to say no. At these low points in my life I'd have to say I dress less often simply cause I don't bother to expend the energy to change when I get home. Though I wear panties on just as regular a basis as boxers.

[teresa jeen]

id have to say yes it is a comfort zone for me. i would prefer to stay dressed all the time tho.

[Samantha43]

I have a high stress job, and CDing is an escape to a comfort zone for me. When I dress, I have no stress, only to be comfortable. My wife actually prefers for me to dress, as she can see the feminine influence and calming effect it has on me.

My wife actually told me that she prefers the feminine side of me. I have a strong male personality and can kind of be demanding and intense. The cross dressing completely changes my state of mind and calms and relaxes me. Now I know why she has been so supportive of my dressing...:happy:

[Seville]

I have talked to counselors about my dressing, I've talked to clergy, therapists, discussion groups, etc. and don't recall any of these so-called professionals mention a comfort zone. I know I fully enjoy dressing and always will, and now I'm aware of one of the reasons it makes me feel good.


Counselors, clergy and therapists are a waste of time and money.
C/Ding is a pleasant stress relieving activity. :happy:

[Sexy_Girl]

Yes absolutely, similar with another sister here,when I am a guy, my personality is very strong, tough and mean ( I always think I am Chevy truck if I m a car lol ). At the same time, in the mind of people surrounding me, I am helpful and discipline. When I m fully dressed, I m being another person, who is a bad girl, and do something I will not do when I am in Guy Mode such as listening dance music, go-go dancing and just having some very sexy postures. At that time, I feel another part of me and being in a comfort zone to release my stress.

[Kate Simmons]

Actually my comfort zone is when I have the male and female feelings balanced. If I go too far one way or the other, I get into trouble. That is what my being Salandra is all about--to keep me that way.:happy:

[JoanFlores]

Yes, I have noticed that when I am feeling low, I dress more and feel much better.

[melissacd]

As I sit here reading this thread in my nightie, fluffy slippers and cozy pink housecoat - I know I am in my comfort zone :)

[Carly D.]

That's nice... I think it is a comfort zone, for many if not all crossdressers.. I feel more comfortable when wearing womens clothing.. I don't think I would feel that way in public.. it's always been a private thing for me... I always say that if wearing womens clothing were to be accepted by everyone that I would like to think I would dress this way all the time, but I'm not sure...

[TrekGirl1701]

I am definitely more comfortable when I'm dressed up. My whole life shopping for my male clothes has always been a chore. I just find them too plain. When I shop for female clothes, though, I have to stop myself from spending too much, because there is just so much out there that appeals to me. The way female clothes are designed just looks cooler to me. It just seems like more thought is put into them than male clothes.

[Amy07]

Not to get to boring or technical, I have taken psych courses in the past that discuss the Comfort Zone. We all have a desire or tendency to do what we know, what we like, see and be with people we know, be in situations that don't hit the "fight or flight" buttons in our heads. Remember how you felt before your first roller coaster ride? Or the first time you put on femme clothes? Once you do it, okay, this is fun, and nice to do. Sometimes, bad outcome, we don't do it again. Dressing is my comfort zone too.

[JoAnnDallas]

When I was younger, dressing was much more a sexual thing than a comfort thing. Today it is all about being comfortable and relaxing. My wife bought me a Pink zip up the front robe, Pink Satin PJ's, and Pink fuzz slippers for Christmas. It is still too cold to wear the PJ's, but she allow me to wear the robe and slippers anytime I want to. They feel so compy and the robe keep me warm and the slippers keep my feet coszy. I can't wait until it gets warmer so I can start wearing my new PJ's.

[Tee]

yes, comfort zone when i am stressed!

[camera_laura]

I only just met my SO last October, but we have gotten to know each other quite well in a short time. We have been intimate on numerous occasions, and I also told her about my dressing shortly after we met. She still has a lot of personal conflict with my dressing, but she is also trying to understand my need to do it.

Last night we had a frank and open discussion about my dressing, and I told her of the many times I dressed during low periods in my life (starting with the death of a sister when I was 15). Then she said something that made the bulb light up. She said dressing was my comfort zone. All the years I have been dressing, feeling good while I did it, but not knowing why I felt good, was summed up in that one statement. I wish my first and second wives could have had that insight.

I have talked to counselors about my dressing, I've talked to clergy, therapists, discussion groups, etc. and don't recall any of these so-called professionals mention a comfort zone. I know I fully enjoy dressing and always will, and now I'm aware of one of the reasons it makes me feel good.

Now I'm wondering if any of you girls out there realize your comfort zone when you are dressed? If you have a story to go along with your comfort zone, feel free to tell it here. I'd love to hear some feedback from all you lovely ladies. Luv and :hugs: Jill








I wish I had your courage. My heart goes out to you (and my support!)
I keep my "comfort zone" to myself.
While my SO (read my BB) accepts me, it is because she doesn't know 100% about me (but that is *my* choice) and I hope someday to be totally honest with her.

[camera_laura]

My wife actually told me that she prefers the feminine side of me. I have a strong male personality and can kind of be demanding and intense. The cross dressing completely changes my state of mind and calms and relaxes me. Now I know why she has been so supportive of my dressing...:happy:


You are the *bomb*!

[Angie G]

I am an only child and at times had no one around to hang with when I was 11 or 12 I found some dresses and shoes skirt & blouses in the attic where we lived They belonged to a woman In one of the appartments in the building I'd go to the attic and wear them. I think it was my Comfort zone when I was alone :hugs:
Angie

[Wickanne GG]

JiFem9ll,

I am happy to read you’re still with your SO and working through the challenges. :hugs:

I don’t think what you are referring to is exclusive to MTF CDs (and I am not implying you thought it was). I am a GG but with a “masculine” element. When my emotions are challenged, with something I am not ready to deal with, the first thing I tend to do is wrap myself in the security of track pants/army pants and a sweatshirt. Dressing in “typical” male mode is like a ‘mental security blanket’. I know the clothing doesn’t change anything regarding the issue(s) but it does facilitate the mental change of attitude and bring about a stabilization of the female/male balance…it places limits on the “stereotypical” female hysteria.

With all that happened in 2007 I don’t remember wearing any make-up or really doing any truly feminine dressing. It seemed like too much trouble to go the lengths a girl has to go, at a time when upheaval prevailed in my life.

Having come to terms with an ersatz relationship, my son’s injuries, and umpteen other things…now 2008 is staring to see a shift in clothing choices, make-up, home décor, income level, partner preferences…it’s all good because I still have my “male” pursuits also.

All the best to you and your SO.

:love:
Wickanne

[brandi lynn]

I also agree dressing is my comfort zone. When I'm dressed it brings a calm natural feeling to me. I can think,relax and see things in a different light which seems to make things better. My wife also will tell me you need some dress time when she knows I'm stressed or feeling down, knowing it will pick me up and put me into a better mood.

[Mary Jane1]

I've never thought oi it in that term but I guess a rose by any other name.... Yes, it is a comfort zone. Even with public disapproval, nervousness about being found out before I'm ready to come out and all the little inconveniences and difficulties of being a cross dresser, when all is said and done, if I'm 'en femme' I feel secure as a woman. Or comfortable, if you will. I'm closer to my natural self and I like it. It feels good.

[Christen3042]

Absolutely, dressing en femme puts me in my "comfort zone".

It used to be all about the sexual thrill, but I've found that dressing also calms me down and relieves my depression enormously (depression: that's a whole 'nother story). I think that one of the reasons is that when I dress, I become Chris - she doesn't have a boss, she doesn't pay taxes, she doesn't have a mortgage - she doesn't have any worries at all.

Now THAT'S a comfort zone!