Crushing Defeat.

[Mariah]

I just got handed to me yesterday from my therapist A Letter... not the one We all want. But one to totally Withdraw me from school due to mental problems and that I can't function in the world as of right now. This saddens me at lot because it took a lot of work to get in to collage in the first place. and now that dream is over.

I'm also having to go on full med Disability Due to the same thing, I can't enter the work force and be productive in the world. I've feeling so down right now. In the long run I believe it might be the right thing to do. but what do I do now? sit at home and stare at the celling some more 7 days week?


keris

[Shelly Preston]

Hi keris

You may be able to do some volunteer work which wouold give you something to do as well as a good thing to have on your cv
Especially if you do manage to get back looking for a full time job

[MJ]

welcome to my world . i too have the same diagnosis for now it's a long road to recovery . but try to find things to do i am active at my local church thats helps me a lot but in the *down times * forgive the pun in my quiet time i read a little anything to help me through the depression . :hugs:

but i can't keep focus for long, i can't sleep can't be bothered to do anything i have to push myself to do anything . i understand :love:
all the best

[kerrianna]

Keris, this is obviously a time for you to repair your nets, to use a fishing term. You need to take time for yourself and your job is rebuilding your confidence, self esteem and stability.

That's a lot of work, so don't think you won't be doing anything.

On a practical level, like Shelly suggested, you could volunteer. You could expand your hobbies, maybe use them to connect with other people. You could explore things you have been curious about but never got to do.

Just because you are not going to be going to school doesn't mean you can't learn. Some of the most educated people in the world are self taught. And you can still take things like night school or other classes that might intrigue you.

Open your mind up honey and take this as an opportunity to dedicate yourself to yourself.

I know it's harsh. It's a real come down for you to get told that. But you can turn this around. You have to do the hard work of believing in yourself and learning where you need support and where you can freely give.

Do not wallow Keris.

We will be checking in on you and NO WALLOWING allowed. (ok, a little bit, it's human nature). But we will be on your ass if we think you're just staring at the walls all day.

Use this as a chance to reinvent yourself and learn to appreciate the little things in life that help get us through the days.

I'm sorry you are in such a difficult place right now. It'll get better hon. But you do have to want to make it better. :hugs::love:

[heidi99]

I just got handed to me yesterday from my therapist A Letter... not the one We all want. But one to totally Withdraw me from school due to mental problems and that I can't function in the world as of right now. This saddens me at lot because it took a lot of work to get in to collage in the first place. and now that dream is over.

I'm also having to go on full med Disability Due to the same thing, I can't enter the work force and be productive in the world. I've feeling so down right now. In the long run I believe it might be the right thing to do. but what do I do now? sit at home and stare at the celling some more 7 days week?


keris

Hi, Keris.

I'm going to try not to get on a soapbox (not about you, but about "professionals" that make one feel powerless.)

Some of the things I've read in the not-so-distant past concentrated not so much on "diagnosing" what is wrong with a person, but rather identifying those things the person is doing RIGHT/WELL, and using those as small victories upon which to build more victories. For instance, (there's not a lot of written info that you supplied, but...) you DID make it into college. If you did it once, it seems logical that it can happen again. Kind of get the hang? I would think that if one does this exercise (perhaps it's a little like practicing turning any statement on its head to reflect the glass is half full), that one will begin to feel more capable. Depression sets in when it feels like there is nothing we can DO about our situation, ya know?

Others recommended doing SOMETHING, like volunteer work or the like. I agree that sitting at home and staring at the ceiling will likely feed the depression.

My thoughts are with you, and I hope my words will help keep you from falling slave to what must have been some rather devastating words in that letter.

[Mariah]

sorry for the late reply, I've been sleeping alot. Tomororow I have to file everything. thanks for the great words everyone, I get such great support here. tommrorow is going to be soo hard.

I could volunteer but that requires me to intract with people. if I could do that I would not have to leave school and go on with my life with out a collage degree. it's hard but with support from wonderful people like you I'll get through it.

keris

[Felix]

Hi Keris Hun I feel for ya :hugs::hugs: It's a crap place to be. I recently withdrew myself from the workplace before the management did. I could see I needed time out for me like Kez said. Like you said it probably is the best thing for ya right now, I know it is for me :happy: Time for reflection and time for getting my head sorted away from the madenning crowd. You will be alright Hun we are all here for ya. Ya not alone Hun :hugs::hugs: Hope this has helped a little xx Felix :hugs:

[Joy Carter]

Oh Keris please don't give up Hun. Ive been where you are and it's not good. You are worth while. You are valuable. You just need to find the place you are appreciated.

God Bless

[tonette]

Keris,
You sound like a young person with a whole lot og life in front of you. Don't allow yourself to fall down when there is so much good to experience. We're all in a special group just like the Church Lady said on SNL.
You got into college and you can always work on it through out your life. I'm almost sixty and I'm still going to college and even getting invited to lecture other students in my profession. I never got my degree for a number of reason, most of them emotional, but in my mind I'm as educated and experienced as anyone.
You need to feel the same about yourself!
Go for it, girl!
Tonette

[Pamela Julie]

Keris, I am sorry to hear your depression has caused you to withdraw from school. After you recover some, and you will, you can always go back, possibly part time to start. The worst thing you can do is to lie around feeling sorry for yourself. We know you are a worthy person, now you need to feel your worth. There are many volunteer opportunities around, some near your home I am sure. Animal shelters, caring for the cute puppies and kittens. Churches, keeping up the facilities and grounds, or driving the church bus. Teaching the illiterate how to read and write. Meals on wheels, delivering one meal a day to the elderly and infirm. I could go on but you get the idea. You can also take online classes at your local college and some national colleges and work at your own pace. I know you will get through this, and I like everyone else here will help you.

[Mariah]

thanks everyone. can't volunteer requires me to be near other people. but worse news. my school does not have a med withdraw they see it just like a junky pot head withdrawing with all the bad that goes with it. so no more collage for me. got done with ssi fileing have to see how that goes. most likly denied did not work enough in the last 10 years. lol.

I'm going to lose everything. I have alot to talk to my theripest tommorow about.

thanks for the loves though it really helps!
keris

[KateSpade83]

I don't beleive what every therapist says. I was unvoluntarily put in the mental ward for 2 weeks several times and they all gave me some crappy diagnosis without seeing me much. Then I had a real bad setback, got probation for 30 months and no company would hire me but I got lucky with an SSDI income of around $730 / month. All I did was enjoy food, buy bikes and exercise to lose weight, and thrift shop for clothes. I would have to budget for brand new ones. Living on SSDI for life without working sucks and is so minimalist. Don't listen to your DR, try to get through college and a working career.

I very glad my career has been resurrected, as 4 days work > 1 month's SSDI! I now can enjoy spending money on a lot of nice things I want. A life on SSDI is so minimalist, boring, and limited. I plan to have a good career so I can be off SSDI, which I consider was temporary for me [I still get it].

[AmandaM]

If the cure is worse, don't do it. There must be a third option!

[Sally2005]

Do what you know you can live with and do what you need to do to get better. If there is a will their is a way. You need to get your desire/will back first and finding the solution/way to make the most of your life will follow. Even if your school says they can do nothing, if you withdraw from classes at least make it formal by sending them a registered letter explaining your case. You may be surprised how they can help and the value the letter may have in the future. Work with your doctor and do what you can to help yourself get better.