What now?

[Kate Simmons]

We are explorers and we are adventurers. We come to this fabulous "girl land" to seek fulfillment and adventure. Sometimes we hit peaks and valleys, sometimes we hit a lot of roadblocks, impediments and booby traps along the way, sometimes it seems like we are on a treadmill with endless repetition. Put it on, go out, take it off, repeat. We are driven to do it--never mind society, this is our "baby", our challenge, our goal.

What happens when we reach the summit of the mountain, plant our "flag" and bask in the sunlight? This is pretty much where I am right now. I'm at the top, I've accomplished my goals and am pretty satisfied and fulfilled. I've amalgamated all of my feelings and can be anyone I want to be which is no mean feat, considering how fragmented I was in the beginning.

A lot depends on our outlook I guess and how we view ourselves when we are doing this stuff. It can seem outright silly, pointless and meaningless for an able bodied man to want to look like and act like a woman, on the surface at least. Like many adventurers though we seek a treasure. The secret of this treasure can be perplexing until we dig a bit deeper.

I won't describe it here but those who have seen it know what I'm talking about. Obtaining it requires fortitude and is not for the faint of heart and is sometimes very costly. Is it worth it? Oh yeah. The problem is once we have it, what do we do with it? That is my next quest it seems.:happy:

[Jennaie]

Salandra, my friend, if I were in PA and could come visit with you, I would take you fly fishing (en-femme of course..what a site that would be) and we could jointly decide that the key to life is endurance.

[Kate Simmons]

I think that would be pretty cool Jennaie. I miss the simple pleasures. When I was in Nam, we used to sit up drinking until 3 AM solving the mysteries of the Universe. We did pretty well really. Problem is, we had to get back up at 7 AM to go to work. By the time we got 5 cups of coffee in us, we forgot all of the solutions, so I know full well what you mean when you talk about endurance. Such is life.:happy:

[Dalece]

Your right Salandra It takes endurance I to was in Nam and was up for three days straight. How do you fly fish. Done normal fishing live near the lake. Our treasure is in your heart follow it and you will find your treasure. I follow mine and what I want. If I get kicked down then I get up and brush it off and trudge forward. And to sister Salandra welcome home.

[Bethany_Anne_Fae]

Excellent post, Salandra

I don't know what my "peak" would be yet because I am still exploring so many different aspects of dressing. Maybe there isn't one where I am concerned. Everything is still very much alive and FUN and it is my hope that it stays that way for a long time. If not, then I will probably come here, and pose the same question for others to ponder.

Thank you, for what you (and many others I deeply respect here),bring to the table.

*hugs*

Zara

[Kate Simmons]

Your right Salandra It takes endurance I to was in Nam and was up for three days straight. How do you fly fish. Done normal fishing live near the lake. Our treasure is in your heart follow it and you will find your treasure. I follow mine and what I want. If I get kicked down then I get up and brush it off and trudge forward. And to sister Salandra welcome home.You've got it Dalece. Old "birds" like us who have pretty much seen it all and pretty much know what it's all about. There is very little anyone can do to us really and I for one don't really give a rat's whisker. We've done our duty for our country and our family. We've done the guy thing and the girl thing and are pretty satisfied and in charge of our own destinies. Not everyone is ready for self ownership but once I got there, I wouldn't trade it for anything. The greatest treasure for me is knowing who I am and that it is totally my choice.:happy:

[melissacd]

Salandra,

I am still at the beginning of this journey and have much to learn, much distance to travel to reach the peak, plant the flag (it has to be a nice pink one) and see the glorious view.

Perhaps the answer to "what now" is exactly what you are doing here, asking these types of questions and helping others get to the top. You have gone through many trials and tribulations to achieve what you have achieved, you have reached a level within yourself that feels like the right place, you have made peace with your femme side - now perhaps the next mountain to climb is that of mentor and ambassador for the community, assuming that these are things that fill your soul with purpose and meaning.

I know that much of what you have said on the forum and directly to me have been very helpful and has assisted me on my own personal journey. I hope that as I grow in all of this that I can help others in theirs.

Thanks as always for the inspiring thread.

Huggs
Melissa

[Ruth]

Thank you Sal, your posts are unique and you always manage to dig a little deeper than everybody else. I have not reached my destination yet as regards CDing but I understand already that it's just another station on the way.
Life should be an adventure and I try to make sure it stays that way.
Thanks again for your insights and inspiration.
Love,
Ruth

[Kate Simmons]

Thanks Melissa, you've given me much to think about. Finding the treasure is only the beginning really. Using it wisely is another story all together. Everyone's particular treasue is a bit different and custom made for them and them alone, I realize that now. We are all different and it's never a "one size fits all". Not only would that be impossible but totally impractical as well. We all have different outlooks, different skill sets and different expertise. Turning what we do into something that is value added to others is positive but in order to do that, we have to understand ourselves and who we are first. That takes time and effort and as you know, it certainly doesn't happen overnight.

We talk sometimes about having an instant "button" to become a woman and I suppose it would be nice if that were so. The only drawback I see to that is that there really is no taking of ownership there and no real "work" required to get it. Hard as it may be, experience is really the best teacher. How do we handle issues and things that will come up unless we actually "live" it? That's why your great femme experiment is a good thing. You get to see and experience things first hand and gain the ability to make decisions. If the situation were suddenly thrust upon us by pushing a "button", most of us would be clueless on how to react. Talk is "cheap" as they say. Would we really be able to hold up our end of it? Only those willing to take the "plunge" can really answer that.

In any case, I look at this as a new challenge. Where things go from here is anyone's guess. None of us have all the answers really and that is why the Forum is such a great place. It's the greatest co-op and collective in the world for TG issues and as much experience in life that I have, I'll be the first to admit I learned something new or gained a new perspective. We support one another.:happy:

[Kathy Renee]

Hello Salandra,

I agree totally with Melissa and have enjoyed your posts and threads immensely. I have been CDing for a long time. Because of the decisions I made with regard to family, I will never reach the pinnacle of having a beautiful body with closets full of clothes accompanied by many adventures enfemme. I think the pinnacle is reaching the peace of mind you have obtained. The clothes and makeup are just window dressing. In my case, I am still striving for perfecting makeup, etc. but since accepting myself for who I am, it seems less important.

We all tend to look at things from a perspective of what we know. For you, your Vietnam experience seems to be that perspective. I am a geologist and evolution is an important aspect in my technical training. I tend to view all things from an evolutionary perspective. As odd as it sounds, bra stuffing is an evolutionary process – first with tissues, then socks, then birdseed, then foam forms and ultimately silicone forms. A first bra yanked from the rack at WalMart to going to a department store and having a fitting and purchasing an expensive bra. But again, all window dressing even though it is a lot of fun dressing the window. It is the evolution of the mental aspects of CDing that has caught my attention the last few years and this forum (your posts particularly) has helped me greatly in the short time that I have been here.

So what now? People have climbed mountains since we as a species first stood erect. Mt. Everest was conquered. That did not stop others from trying to this day. What became of the people who have climbed Mt. Everest and planted their flags, they became teachers or leaders for others. This whole post may not make any sense as I seem to be rambling but I see you as a teacher or leader. I do not know if you have any desire to do that but as I see it, you are doing it any way through this forum.

[Angie G]

We must just keep on going and see what's down the road hun :hugs:
Angie

[Kate Simmons]

Thanks Kathy but I don't see myself as anyone special--never did. Just a guy (girl, whatever) ambling along life doing my thing. Most of the stuff I make up as I go along, improvising and ad libbing all the way and that's the fun part. There are no definate "rules" for what we do, so we mostly have to modify conditions to make things fit for our particular situation. I've always been a kind of "seat of the pants" type person anyway and when accidents and mistakes happen and things still work out anyway, "mum" is the word for me.:heehee:

Still, things do not happen on their own and we need to provide input in our own life and in the world. If we do not, entropy is always there waiting to take over. We are here to experience our emotions and feelings and to develop as a race and it seems that we stand here poised to make the next evolutionary leap. How much do we really control our own destiny as a species? Only we can make that call and only we can make it a pleasant one.:happy:

[Carol A]

Good question good answers, I kinda feel like a football player give me the ball and let me run and we will see what happens.
I only have a step or two to take before I reach the top of that mountain then who knows?.:heehee:

[Lois1234]

http://www.panhala.net/Archive/The_Journey.html

I feel it's a journey that has too many variables to ever seem i'm at the peak. Once you climb a montain, you'll see many more that you haven't climbed. The site above is a poem by Mary Oliver i found that best describes how i feel.

Hugs, Lois

[Holly]

One peak down, infinate number of peaks ahead. The thing with life is that the answers always seem to contain more questions. I guess it proves we're still alive.

[docrobbysherry]

Sorry Salandra! I know u hate that, but they r rite.
I went thru the same war u did. And thru the Hari Krishna/peace movement. U give off the same relaxed, calm vibes that the Masters did/do.

" U must relax Grasshoppa!" "It is Not about the destination. More important is, to enjoy the journey".

Well, I'm still at the "kid-in-the-candystore" stage of dressing. Having been married, I know this honeymoon with Sherry won't last. I expect if I just relax and let it happen, the hidden, next phase of my CDing will appear.
But, it is still such a high for me, I'm a bit jealous of anyone who has a casual attitude toward dressing.

I'm too old to be having, and enjoying sex this much!
RS

[Kate Simmons]

I hear you RS but the greatest teacher we all have is ourself and our own experience, not to mention our brain and our thinking ability. One of my favorite comic book heroes growing up was Adam Strange. He was an American archeologist who got wisked away by a teleportation beam to a distant planet (Rann). In a "silver age" of super heroes, he had no super powers to speak of, only his intelligence and his raw courage. He became the hero of his adopted planet saving it time and time again by listening to his own innate intelligence.

The point is he listened to himself and paid attention, won the day and got the girl. It's no big secret really. All that is required is having faith in ourself and our own abilities and we can accomplish many things and be whoever we want to be. Taking ownership of ourself and responsibility for what we do is the key really.:happy:

[vikki2020]

Salandra, I never pass up one of your threads, and posts like this are the reason.As I move forward, I'm not yet sure where the peak is yet, but in just the few months since I discovered this forum,I have a better sense of direction,and I'm much more "sure footed" as I climb.Thanks to all of you.As for what to do when you reach the top? I don't know,but at least stop and enjoy the view for a while!

[Nicki B]

The point is he listened to himself and paid attention, won the day and got the girl.

Seems like that's what you've done.. So - what did he do next? :winking:

[Kate Simmons]

Well,Nicki, the premise of the story was that the Zeta (teleportation) beam charge in his body eventually wore off and he was drawn back to Earth but knew where other beams were scheduled to strike, so kept going back to Rann (his girl friend lived there after all). Invariably, every time he arrived, there was always a new menace to overcome which is why it was a series. Eventually he went to Rann without the teleportation beam and he and his sweetheart Alanna were married, settled down and had a child. Of course being a hero you are always called on to do something it seems which is why I did't want to be one because heroes get tired. Damn, that's how I started this journey to begin with isn't it? It's always something it seems.:heehee: