Advice and Courage!

[charlie]

Hello All!
In several posts I have explained that I love going out after my hour and one half of getting ready, but have only gone to TG friendly places..ie bars. While these have been fun, I would like to try going out to a public place. I am apprenhensive about having problems though. I also have read several posts that say that being forthright and walking like you belong there will help. Where can I get and learn this. How did you ladies that go out get the courage to walk right into a grocery store or prance through Macy's fully dressed?

[Nicole Erin]

Well just don't act nervous.
It might be a matter of looking your own nervousness right in the eye and telling it to "f" off.

The more natural and confident you act the better off. Doesn't mean NO one will be a smart ass but it is less likely.

Of course remember small steps. Maybe start by shopping later when few people are around or whatever... small steps to build confidence, challenge yourself.

Sometimes when you are out you could come face to face with young people. They might giggle or act stupid. Yes you will want to run and hide in the closet but don't let it discourage you.

[Eugenie]

How did you ladies that go out get the courage to walk right into a grocery store or prance through Macy's fully dressed?

First of all I needed the support of various people, for one, the support of groups like this one have made me feel a lot more comfortable with my x-dressing.

Spending time with a woman friend who gave me lots of advice with my dressing and makeup styles and said confidence raising messages to memade e feel far more at ease.

Then, doing a coming out (while in drab) to a few friends helped me realize that I was well accepted by others. In particular my confidence was boosted tremendously by my coming out to a person whom I highly respect and who told me that I was doing nothing wrong and when I showed her a picture told me that I looked nice "en femme".

All these made me find the strength to go out in public, actually going out "en femme" from the hotel where I was hosted , walking through reception area full of confidence. And it worked out very well.

Since that time, I've gone out "en femme" several times and have enjoyed it tremendously.

:hugs:
Eugenie

[Nicki B]

Try going with a friend, first? :)

[Sally24]

This might help a little.
http://www.masstpc.org/mediawiki/index.php?title=MTF_passing_tips

[tamarav]

Its just like everythinbg else in life, you don't know until you try. It can be harrowing but the rewards internally far outweigh the fears.

I once quit dressing and going out because of a rude remark by a Macey's clerk. It finally dawned on me that another person was not controlling my life, I was. I had a long talk with all my personalities and got back on the horse and went out with a vengance. I now see the same little dumpy sales clerk and flaunt my look right past her. She has never said anything to me since. In fact she came into my salon to have her hair cut and almost peed her pants when she spotted me. She was new to the salon so one of the newer stylists cut her hair, and did a great job. She is still dumpy....

You go girl! Hold your head up, walk like you belong (and you do), and smile at everyone.

That's my 7 cents worth of old fart advice.

Your sis,

Tami

[JenniferR771]

Ease into to it gradually. Dress in slacks if you must. Get a professional makeover. Do a little mall walking. It gets easier.

[SandyR]

Smile! Look them in the eye, be proud. You have a right to be there. I know the nerve thing, we all do, but the rush of filling up the car with gas, going to the mall, its all worth it!

Hugs!

SandyR

[paulaN]

Ya gotta take a deep breath and just do it. If every thing works out good and in your favor. You will say, that was easy. If it doesn't then you will have to get up the courage to try again. I'll bet that your going to say, That was easy. Cause if I can say (that was easy) anyone can say it. Look at my pics hun I'm no knock out. I am shy, I get all nerved up, but I have been there and done that and said. WOW!!! that was easy. Lets do it again!!!!! Gawd I love going out.