Outed to the sales lady

[Shelly Preston]

I think I outed myself to the sales lady yesterday

The scary thing is I only just realised I did it

I was looking to buy boots (well not really but thats where I ended up)

So I asked the older sales lady (probably the shop manager) for some help

I explained I was not sure oh which size was suitable to get as sometimes a Size 8 was a touch tight

She told me if it was her buying boots she goes to the next size up so I bought a Size 9 pair :happy:

She never asked about who the boots were for or how did I know the size 8 was shoe tight

So I can only assume she knew

What do you think +?

[Felix]

That's cool Shelly :hugs: :thumbsup: xx Felix :hugs:

[Sharon]

She may well suspect that the boots were for you, Shelly, but, since you don't otherwise know the sales person, it doesn't really matter. It's just a shame you had to purchase them without first trying them on.

[Deborah Jane]

I guess she knows Shelly:heehee:..But you got the boots ok so no problem:happy:

[sandra-leigh]

I think I outed myself to the sales lady yesterday


Shelly, I haven't followed your postings or looked up what you have written about yourself -- but how could someone with almost 8000 postings here not have outed themselves to numerous sales people by now???

Reminds me of a couple of months ago when I went into a department store looking for a long skirt. Talking to a couple of SA's, describing what I wanted, I verbally described it, and then pointed out the length I wanted -- pointing on myself! I realized a few seconds later what I'd done, but IU just mentally shrugged and said to myself, "So what? They would have known quickly enough when I asked to try it on!

Heck, places don't just "read me", they recognize me and welcome me back! And somehow the places I've never been before aren't at all surprised when I openly shop for myself: it probably only takes a few seconds of watching me flipping through the racks and fingering the material and holding up pieces for them to figure me out :heehee:

A local lingerie shop owner told me that it is usually fairly easy for her to figure out who the crossdressers (or would-be crossdressers) are: if a guy looks at the selection and fingers the material, he is probably a crossdresser, and if he touches the forms, then he is definitely a crossdresser. So if you shop for yourself, even if you don't try things on, Sales Assistants often know what you are doing.

[Nicki B]

..The scary thing is I only just realised I did it

I was looking to buy boots (well not really but thats where I ended up)

So I asked the older sales lady (probably the shop manager) for some help

I explained I was not sure oh which size was suitable to get as sometimes a Size 8 was a touch tight

She told me if it was her buying boots she goes to the next size up so I bought a Size 9 pair :happy:

She never asked about who the boots were for or how did I know the size 8 was shoe tight

I think it that didn't really matter, to either of you - particularly if you've only just thought of it? But, from the conversation you just described, there's nothing to indicate one way or the other.

TBH I wouldn't waste any sleep? :)

[serinalynn]

I have shopped in stores near where I live and in Las Vegas and if the S/A's didn't know I usually toll them an item was for me. I've never had a problem with S/A's in any store I shop in. ANd at times I have even asked to use a fitting room and never had a problem getting one. :heehee:

[Nicole Erin]

Unless you are a regular at that store and the SA knows who you are, she probably never even thought about it. SA's don't really dwell on customers or sales.
So you shouldn't worry about it.

[Wendy me]

Shelly she knows ...... i told her they were for you...........

[Fab Karen]

Just try them on. The salesperson probably got that you were shopping for yourself & was being gentle with you to encourage you.

[trannie T]

What is there to hide? I believe Scotland is fairly liberal and a man will not be sent to gaol for buying women's clothing. I have outed myself to many sales associates and have always received a nice response.

If you have a question about whether an item will fit you, ask to try it on.

[Alice B]

I'm sure she knew, but so what. She did not make any issue of it. Did she offer the chance to try the boots on? I would think that trying them on would answer any fit questions. With the new ones (my first) that I bought last week I tried them on and I was totally in drab. No one said a thing or gave me any sort of looks. Was a boost to my confidence.

[Ema1234 GG]

You know what, I worked in retail for a long time and guys bought female clothes all the time. I'm sure I served many crossdressers at some point or another.

I honestly didn't bat an eyelid. Sometimes you knew, other times I'm sure I had no idea. But the ones that always made me think where the ones who made up a silly excuse.

In that case Shelly, I think she may well have thought you were buying for your Mrs? Or she knew but it really made no difference to her?

If a CD had come up to me and asked for advice and whether they could try it on I'd have thought it was great they felt comfortable enough to be able to do that and would have loved to have helped them. And that was all a long time before I knew my partner was a CD!

[Carly D.]

I don't think you "outed" yourself, really.. I mean you could have just as easily been telling the sales lady the other side of the conversation.. the girls side of the conversation.. maybe...

[Di]

Hon no worrys.....In retail she would be just happy it is a sale........and from what I've heard most shoe sales are commision....so if she wondered I'm sure she was just happy she made the sale. Now the important part...wheres the pics of the boots? Dish hon...tell me what they look like what color...I want all the details:p Enjoy them :love:

[ravens_roost2004]

I "OUT" myself every time I take something to the dressing room to try on. No one ever cares.

[Magickman]

After you conquer your fears and anxieties, it is no big deal to ask sales assistants for help, and to try on clothes in a store.

If shopping in a women's clothing store, I simply explain what I would like, give my size, and try things on, in the fitting room.

The sales people never give me any trouble, and usually are quite helpful.

[Eugenie]

Hi Shelly,

As Mlle Erin said:


Unless you are a regular at that store and the SA knows who you are, she probably never even thought about it. SA's don't really dwell on customers or sales.
So you shouldn't worry about it.

The only problem here would have been if this shop was a local store where people know you and where other people who know you, but not as a x-dresser, also go.

By and large, shop keepers don't really care about such thinks. Whet counts for them is to make a sale...

Thanks to the great content of this crossdressers.com forum, I have now come to feel far more comfortable telling shopkeepers or sales attendents that I am buying these feminine clothes or shoes for myself.

It saves a lot in trial and error...

:hugs:
Eugenie

[Susan.]

I think it being boots she probably already made the connection. Some things women just buy for themselves and I think boots would fit into that category for the most part. I think bras would fit in that category too, unless they are very sexy bras. If it is a plain ol' bra she knows it ain't for you. :2c:

[TSchapes]

If I'm spending more than $50.00 on a pair of shoes in a shoe store, I try them on, drab and all. I pick a store outside where I live, talk to the SA and say look I want to try on a pair of shoes. Sometimes they even offer to have me try them on in back, though that's always not necessary. My cheap gene reigns over my outing gene. :D

Love Tracy

[Sarah Rabbit]

Shelly she knows ...... i told her they were for you...........


Yeah...And I was the Sales Lady, brought in on a fact finding mission for head office....As soon as I realised who they were for, I added $30 to the price because I knew you wanted to get out of there without making a fuss..
:devil:

Sarah R. :bunny:

[Shelly Preston]

Yeah...And I was the Sales Lady, brought in on a fact finding mission for head office....As soon as I realised who they were for, I added $30 to the price because I knew you wanted to get out of there without making a fuss..
:devil:

Sarah R. :bunny:

Nice try Sarah but I dont use $$$ its £££££ here :heehee:

But I will be watching for you next time :)

[obsessedwithpantyhose]

:2c: as some of you know i DONT do the full en femme thing,,im a guy in womens clothes and its how i like to be,,,so if i need help finding something for me that was labled "womans" i HAVE to out myself if i realy want what ever it is im shoping for,,,and you know what? i dont give a crap who knows about it....:D