One more time

[jill s]

Going back to a Therapist tomorrow. It's what my wife wants and I really need this roller coaster to even out before I lose what's left of my sanity. I talked with this lady once right after I came out to my wife, she knows gender and sexuality issues pretty well. The last one I went to almost a year ago I didn't feel was too up on this issue. Well wish me luck, for some reason I'm scared this time.

[Brynna M]

I'll leave the advice to the thearapist but I can somewhat understand being afraid (I'm in therapy for non CD related things)

I hope you have good luck, all the strength you need, and solve whatever it is needs solving.

B

[Nicki B]

Going back to a Therapist tomorrow. It's what my wife wants and I really need this roller coaster to even out before I lose what's left of my sanity. I talked with this lady once right after I came out to my wife, she knows gender and sexuality issues pretty well. The last one I went to almost a year ago I didn't feel was too up on this issue. Well wish me luck, for some reason I'm scared this time.

Jill, what would be the desired result, for you and for your partner?

[jill s]

Desired results; For me some some way to deal with the guilt/shame that I think is causing these 180 deg. changes in my view of myself. Two days in a row of either: "I'm OK with being Trans-something" or, "I never want to even think of putting on a dress" , would be better that this constant war in my head. For my wife I really don't know. She is outwardly calm about it as long as I keep it out of her sight. The few times we have talked about my dressing she always ends up sobbing and usually brings religion into it. We are a mixed marriage, she is Christian and I'm totally non-religious. I think that makes any real understanding of some subjects imposable between us.

[Nicki B]

So you both need to find some acceptance, then? Is she going to attend any of it? If not, you look as if you may not solve anything, particularly if she's hoping for a 'cure'... :hmmm:

[trannie T]

It appears that you are dealing with some serious emotional issues. Thinking of your session with the therapist may also cause you to focus on these issues. The only advice I can give is to be honest and open with her.

[jill s]

Nicki, we both did go to the same therapist. My wife won't go to anyone that isn't Christian and I want someone that has experience in gender issues. She has said she will meet with this lady but won't be counseled by her. I feel I need to get myself more stable before anything else can change.

[Nicki B]

Jill, I'm sorry, of course you need to get yourself on an even keel - but what I was getting at is the whole solution must involve you both, as a couple, for your partnership to find some peace?

I wonder how she would cope with seeing a Doctor who wasn't Christian - surely, what is most important is to find someone who is an expert in their field? :strugglin

[Scotty]

Churches tend to place a lot of guilt on people that don't conform.

No disrespect intended to any church going people, if you are here and are going to church you obviously have an open mind, but plenty that go to church do NOT have an open mind and thus we are abominations. (Yet the catholic church will say that John the baptist was a crossdresser before they admit Mary Magdelline is in the last supper painting....).

Go figure.

You may be experiencing some of that guilt, indirectly?