View Full Version : Do you enjoy it when a woman reads you?
KateSpade83
03-29-2008, 07:48 PM
For those that go out in drag, do you enjoy it when a woman reads you? I really don't mind getting read by women, and it always amuses me what's their reaction! And then if they like a guy in drag, the better! But if a guy reads you, that's such a downer and a potential problem. The best thing can can do is just give him a good laugh - happened to me and I just made a little fun of myself by my expression. I don't mind making people laugh! Geez, you can't pass 100% !
What usually happens to you when you get read by a woman?
DanaR
03-29-2008, 08:05 PM
What I've seen is most of the time women will give you a big smile, which I'll return. Actually, I think that is nice.
Guys, usually a look of horror and a look why would you do that to yourself?
What I've seen is most of the time women will give you a big smile, which I'll return. Actually, I think that is nice.
Guys, usually a look of horror and a look why would you do that to yourself?
Danar is right on for me too . i get that smile and well i just smile back.
guys thats tough because you never know how they will react
Nicki B
03-29-2008, 08:20 PM
I don't take pleasure in being read - but I guess I expect people to see me for what I am and that doesn't bother me? (Most of the time.. :rolleyes: )
Esther
03-29-2008, 08:49 PM
I agree too. Actually, I like it when a woman reads me, but don't stick around if a guy does.
After I got my look together (what colors and styles looked best) I discovered that I enjoyed being read. I've only been out a few dozen times. Laughter is the worst reaction I've had. I prefer that to a hostile reaction of course.
I'm certain anyone who gave me a second look recognized me as male (I'm 5' 12", 190# and built like Red Skelton)!
KateSpade83
03-29-2008, 09:28 PM
OK, there are certain times when you don't want women to read you. The washroom. The Sales Clerk or fitting room clerk or else they won't let you try on women clothes in the women's fittting room. I came out to my St John Saleslady and we have a great relationship! She totally enjoyed seeing me in drag, and we had a good talk, and they let me try on St John clothes in drag. Problem is St John clothes are expensive, even at 60% off! She keeps pushing stuff at me! When I came out to the Macy's Skirt Suit clerk, she said I looked fine, but don't go in the fitting room! - What a downer!
Sometimes, when a few rare women give me the "gay hand," I wonder if they read me or are lesbian. Maybe I should try a lesbian hit on too!
Maybe I should try talking to female shoppers not using my femme voice!
Suzy Harrison
03-29-2008, 11:22 PM
After spending ages trying to get my appearance right I can't say that being read by anyone appeals to me much at all !
Valeria
03-30-2008, 06:52 AM
Sometimes, when a few rare women give me the "gay hand," I wonder if they read me or are lesbian. Maybe I should try a lesbian hit on too!
As someone who is lesbian, and who spends a lot of time with other lesbian women, a "gay hand" is not some sort of routinely used greeting or signal between lesbian women (at least, not in my area of the world). Honestly, outside of an innocent gesture in an animated conversation, I can't recall ever seeing a lesbian woman make that gesture - not our thing.
My best guess would be that they read you and think you are gay, but I seriously doubt that a lesbian woman would do that either (she probably wouldn't assume that a crossdresser is gay, and she probably wouldn't insult a gay man by making a stereotypical gesture like that). So you've been read by someone who's straight and clueless about queer people would be my guess.
But who knows. At least it seems friendly...
KateSpade83
03-30-2008, 08:08 AM
Thanks Kehlers - for the insight, but how do lesbian women signal / hit on each other? Do they just lick their lips when looking at another?
Valeria
03-30-2008, 08:38 AM
Thanks Kehlers - for the insight, but how do lesbian women signal / hit on each other?
Well, often you can pretty well tell if a woman is gay without having to ask (btw, lots of "women who like women" don't describe themselves as "lesbian", for reasons that are complicated - queer woman is often used instead). Also, if you are at a lesbian night club, or some sort of event for queer women, that's a big clue.
But actually, many women use a radical technique I like to call "getting to know someone before you hit on them". :)
Do they just lick their lips when looking at another?
Only in certain kinds of movies. :p
joann07
03-30-2008, 09:02 AM
Me, I really don't think about whether I get read.
Since I've been out so much, the thought of being read doesn't cross my mind because I'm just enjoying being my feininine self and going about my business.
I always have a happy look on my face and anytime I come across a woman, I always smile at her and she smiles back.
Hugs!
TxKimberly
03-30-2008, 10:09 AM
After spending ages trying to get my appearance right I can't say that being read by anyone appeals to me much at all !
Suzy took the words right outta my mouth. I am not CRUSHED when a woman reads me, but I would definitely prefer not.
I DO enjoy it when they bother to speak to me after they have read me. I'll take any chance I can get to help show people that contrary to what the movies and the media have shown them, your average cross dresser is NOT a freak.
At least I HOPE I'm not?! (Shut up Suzy! I don't want to hear the one liners I KNOW your thinking up!)
mylilsecret8
03-30-2008, 10:59 AM
I actually enjoy being read by GGs. The other day I was read by a woman who gave me the biggest smile and said "your shoes are fabulous!". It made my day. :D
It does make me nervous when a guy stares or if read by a group of males since you never know what they might do. I've been lucky so far and the worst that ever happened was a drunk guy lifted my skirt at a convenience store once while his buddies all laughed. I was able to get back to my car and left without any further issues.
KateSpade83
03-30-2008, 04:47 PM
Well, often you can pretty well tell if a woman is gay without having to ask (btw, lots of "women who like women" don't describe themselves as "lesbian", for reasons that are complicated - queer woman is often used instead). Also, if you are at a lesbian night club, or some sort of event for queer women, that's a big clue.
But actually, many women use a radical technique I like to call "getting to know someone before you hit on them". :)
Only in certain kinds of movies. :p
I had a woman lick her lips at me, but she was unattractive.
What you describe is the same way how Chinese men date and find gay guys in their unaccepting society. It implies it's unacceptable among women to be a lesbian too! Where do you live that it's like that? I thought guys thought it was hot to be a lesbian, and why do they put lesbian action insome mainstream porn flicks?
I've seen it where a women insulted another woman for dressing up like a man, when she only had a men's shirt. She called her a dyke. Would this happen often?
Valeria
03-31-2008, 04:35 AM
What you describe is the same way how Chinese men date and find gay guys in their unaccepting society. It implies it's unacceptable among women to be a lesbian too!
Umm, no.
It implies that we aren't being secretive, and we don't need some "special signal". All of my classmates and coworkers know I'm lesbian. There are 3 other lesbian women in my classes at school right now. We all talk about our sexuality quite openly. But most of us have life partners, so we aren't looking for someone to "hit on".
It also implies that most women don't make a pass at someone they haven't even chatted with for a while, and by the time you know someone well enough to be interested, you usually know if they are gay or not.
And those women who are interested in trying to pick up women they barely know usually go some place where the odds are in their favor - like a lesbian bar or cafe, or some sort of LGBT event.
I thought guys thought it was hot to be a lesbian, and why do they put lesbian action insome mainstream porn flicks?
Last I checked, what guys think about lesbians has absolutely no bearing on lesbian culture. :)
I've seen it where a women insulted another woman for dressing up like a man, when she only had a men's shirt. She called her a dyke. Would this happen often?
Well, in the circles I travel in, "dyke" isn't an insult. I'm a dyke. I've proudly marched in the Dyke March during the local gay pride. But yes, there are homophobic people out there who want to verbally harass anyone that doesn't conform. There are certainly people that call will call a man wearing something feminine a "queen", too. But that has nothing to do with lesbian culture, either. The woman flinging that "insult" wasn't lesbian, and the other woman may not have been a dyke either.
Suzy Harrison
03-31-2008, 06:06 AM
Suzy took the words right outta my mouth. I am not CRUSHED when a woman reads me, but I would definitely prefer not.
I DO enjoy it when they bother to speak to me after they have read me. I'll take any chance I can get to help show people that contrary to what the movies and the media have shown them, your average cross dresser is NOT a freak.
At least I HOPE I'm not?! (Shut up Suzy! I don't want to hear the one liners I KNOW your thinking up!)
Wouldn't dream of it, you're as sane as me..
"Hey is that a new (straight) jacket you're wearing?" :heehee:
Kate Simmons
03-31-2008, 06:14 AM
Makes little difference to me one way or the other Kate. I do this for myself after all and address each particular situation as needed.:)
Vicky_Scot
03-31-2008, 08:59 AM
For those that go out in drag, do you enjoy it when a woman reads you? I really don't mind getting read by women, and it always amuses me what's their reaction! And then if they like a guy in drag, the better! But if a guy reads you, that's such a downer and a potential problem. The best thing can can do is just give him a good laugh - happened to me and I just made a little fun of myself by my expression. I don't mind making people laugh! Geez, you can't pass 100% !
What usually happens to you when you get read by a woman?
Why do you use the word "Drag"
Just interested that you choose to use that word.
Xx Vicky xX
jessielee
03-31-2008, 09:13 AM
haven't gone out yet but did share a photo with a genetic girl whos a friend as an experiement and she didn't get it; she just said i look young in the photo. in soft focus from no flash, i guess the makeup wasn't apparent!
jessie
Desiree2bababe
03-31-2008, 09:25 AM
Yes I Love It When "real" Women Know!!!!!!!!
Carly D.
03-31-2008, 11:15 AM
I've never been out in public fully dressed to be tested in that way.. but I have wondered what women think when I buy something at a store.. as they ring it up on the register, are they thinking "this will never fit him".. or "great, another crossdresser."... or are they thinking as I suspect "two more hours and I'm getting rip roaring drunk"...
DanaR
03-31-2008, 11:22 AM
I've never been out in public fully dressed to be tested in that way.. but I have wondered what women think when I buy something at a store.. as they ring it up on the register, are they thinking "this will never fit him".. or "great, another crossdresser."... or are they thinking as I suspect "two more hours and I'm getting rip roaring drunk"...
Maybe all of those.
melissacd
03-31-2008, 12:06 PM
I am under no delusion that even at my best I can be anything but read. I do my best to shave and cover as closely as I can, I do my best to get my hair and makeup right, I choose age appropriate and suitable clothing, I do my best to talk softly and walk appropriately, however, I am not under the belief in my wildest dreams that anyone who looked at me would see me as anything other than a man in a dress - sooooooo
I enjoy when anyone treats me decently and respectfully and in the appropriate gender that I am dressed in. If they want to engage in conversation then I am very happy and willing to do so.
It is important to get past the need to feel that we pass because I think that most of us, if we seriously look at ourselves, cannot. If we can get comfortable with having fun with creating the illusion as best we can and enjoying being in the world in our femme mode, if we can enjoy the moment, then does it really matter if we are read?
Huggs
Melissa
KandisTX
03-31-2008, 12:16 PM
It would depend entirely on her reaction and any subsequent comments she made. If she were nice about it and made small talk with me, or asked me questions, in earnest to learn, and not made snide comments, I think I would have no problem being read in that situation.
Kandis:love::rose2:
Nicki B
03-31-2008, 12:32 PM
I actually enjoy being read by GGs.
I prefer being accepted - which is pretty normal? :strugglin
victoriamwilliams1
03-31-2008, 02:59 PM
I prefer being accepted - which is pretty normal? :strugglin
I agree, acceptance is more important to me, I have had guys hit on me both on the internet and in public, you just have to be careful wile out and about.
KateSpade83
03-31-2008, 10:02 PM
Why do you use the word "Drag"
Just interested that you choose to use that word.
Xx Vicky xX
I just used the word "drag" the same way as saying crossdressing. Didn't seem there was a difference.
vikki2020
03-31-2008, 10:42 PM
I think that when read by a woman, for the most part you receive a very "warm" smile, not a smirk or a "I'm laughing at you "smile.A genuine smile, you return the same, and it's a nice moment!
Trisha
03-31-2008, 11:11 PM
i dont think of my self in drag i dress to go out if i dress in drag i might get a job on stage as to getting read a small percent read me but most people are far to busy doing there own thing to worry about me or what i might be wearing :)
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