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JoAnnDallas
04-07-2008, 11:08 AM
Last year I finally told my wife about my fem side. We set some ground rules back then.

1, I could have one Saturday afternoon to be my girlself.
2. She did not want to see me dressed or pictures of me dressed.
3. I was to keep my fem clothing out of sight.
4. I was to wash and clean my own things.

This is was the status until about a week before Christmas. I usually get up way before she does. One morning it was real cold, so I borrowed a long fleece robe that zips up the front. Well one of the cats pushed my cereal bowl off the kitchen counter. This caused my wife to get up and come into the kitchen to find out what the loud noise was. Well she sees me in her robe but does not say anything. I tell her everything is OK and she goes back to bed. Then two days before Christmas she asks if I would like to have a robe like hers. I said “yes”, so on Christmas Eve we go to Macy’s. So we are looking at similar robes and she says “Try them on, so you will know they fit”. So I try them on, right there in front of everyone. Funny how I was not embarrassed and neither was wife. I select a robe, (PINK of course) and then she asks if I want anything else. I tell her maybe some new PJ’s. So we look at PJ’s and I select a PINK pair of Satin PJ’s. On the way to checkout she spots some fuzzy slippers and hands me a pair of PINK fuzzy slippers. So since then I have walked around the house wearing my PJ’s, robe, and slippers even around her and to bed.
I have been wearing panties pretty much 24/7 since she found out. With our agreement, I usually wait until my Saturday to do my washing. For some unknown reason (guess it was a senior moment), I am changing panties and by mistake dropped a Pink pair with little white flowers in the laundry basket. So we are sitting in the living room last night watching TV and she says, “Are those your PINK panties in the laundry basket?” First thought I had was “OH SH…..”, then decided to just to say, “Yes”. She then says if I have any more that need washing, to put them in the laundry basket. I said, “OK”. I get up and get the ones that are waiting to be washed and put them in the laundry basket. So I guess it’s another small step to acceptance. I hope I can now start keeping my panties in my dresser drawer with my drab underwear.

Nadia-Maria
04-07-2008, 11:19 AM
JoAnn, here are very good news ! Very Happy for you, and hoping my step-by-step policy will pay in the future as much as yours....

Love

Nadia

CrossdressinGoth
04-07-2008, 11:36 AM
awesome! its nice your wife is coming around with this with you. im sure in due time things will be even better for the both of you with this :)

Charolette time
04-09-2008, 07:47 PM
Hi Jo Ann, although the S O doesnt like to see me dressed, she does wash all my panties and folds and puts them in my drawer, one half for the boys and the other for the girls, maybe some day Ill be as lucky as you, Hugs, Charolette

Angie G
04-09-2008, 07:54 PM
That's great Joann it's going the right way hun:hugs:
Angie

danielle_from_cal
04-09-2008, 08:39 PM
The one thing I noted is that your wife went shopping on Christmas eve. Now everyone knows that only men shop on Christmas eve. Perhaps your wife's understanding is a cover for her own crossdressing. You ought to confront her.

Alice B
04-09-2008, 11:10 PM
It must be the moon for things are getting better for me also. Every little step is a big one for us.:hugs:

Princess29
04-10-2008, 06:19 AM
that is a good sign Joann

Raychel
04-10-2008, 06:34 AM
That is great JoAnn. Very small steps at thier pace, Is just the way to klife this life. You wife needs to know that you are still her husband, No matter how you dress.

We had a step here just this week too.
I had all my clothes locked in a cabinet here. On the top shelf I had all my dresses. Well my wife wanted to store some snack foods out of reach from the kids and asked if I could make room in my cabinet.

The closet in my office has all my mens clothes and some of her outfits hanging. I told her that I could hang some of my fem thing in there to free up some space in the locking cabinet. She said that was fine. She also said that there were some garment bags that I could use if I wanted.

So that was a great step at her pace. Now my nices dresses are hanging nicely in the closet, instead of folded in the cabinet
:love::love:

melissacd
04-10-2008, 07:12 AM
Life is full of wonderful little steps and surprises. I am so glad that you are making steps in a positive direction with her. It is always better for both of you that you can evolve with this in a way that you can both live with. You get more of what you need and she gets it in doses that she can adjust to. You push gently and she has time to decide for herself.

If only all relationships, where the secret comes out later, could unfold this way. Too often, a spouse is so railed by the deception, the betrayal of hidden cross dressing, that they respond like mine did, say that they were not given a choice in the matter because of the hidden truth (a fair assessment on their part), that they have lost trust and respect (again a fair statement) and cannot accept or deal with it and leave (as did mine).

In my case she knew after 15 years together and for 10 years afterwards before we finally threw in the towel. No amount of anything was going to move the notch anywhere closer to what you have achieved here so this is a great success for you and your relationship and I wish you further growth with all of this.

The irony of all of this in my case is that now that I have moved out and I am moving on, my ex is starting to tell me that she misses me and she loves me. The other night when I dropped off my kids she gives me a big hug and kiss and says how much she loves and misses me.

It is a case of too little too late on her part. I have reached a point in my journey where I could never go back to her, ever, because I know that she could never even do 1 percent of what you have described here and I cannot give up the miles of progress that I have made even just in thiese past few months on my own.

In your case you are gaining acceptance because she loves you enough to try a little bit each time. In my case my ex pushed me out of her life, required us to sell our house, to throw the kids into disarray, have me move into my own place at great financial and physical expense, required us to get rid of a lot of things because neither of us has space to house these things, through the period of separation was and continues to take mean vindictive snipes at me (I know this is her way of showing hurt) and then has the nerve to say that she misses me and loves me. I like to dress like a woman, however, if I live to be a million years I will never understand them. This is not meant to be a put down but an expression of frustration on my part. I can understand her feeling of anger and being betrayed, her challenges to trusting me, her dislike of this side of me, the feeling of being mis-led in the relationship and I was prepared to take a beating over all of that for the sake of the long relationship and the children, what I continue to be totally perplexed on is how she can just throw everything we have built away without even trying to understand and then say that she misses and loves me.

Sorry I did not mean to rant in this thread, I guess I am just trying to say that I respect what your wife is doing and I am happy that you are making progress.

KandisTX
04-10-2008, 10:11 AM
Sometimes baby steps is all we can ask or hope for. Congrats on another step being taken.

Kandis:love::rose2:

joann07
04-10-2008, 10:14 AM
That's great Joann.
It's a wonderful sign that change is happening for the better.
Just take one step at a time.

Hugs!