For most of us is it our destiny to be alone :(

[jeniinnylons]

I am truly starting to wonder if it is our destiny for most of us to be alone. :sad:

Having been thru a divorce due to immaturity and raising kids with no me time'm starting to winder if I will ever meet a SO. :sad:

[Kate Simmons]

Funny, I've been wondering the same thing Jenni. Even with my new balanced feelings, I've come to the conclusion I may be destined to be alone. Time will tell, I guess.

[Kris]

I am trying not to upset anyone but .. pleeezee!

Salandra..... Are you depressed? This isn't the Salandra that I have spent hours talking to!

There are many GG's out there that are interested in CD's. Maybe it takes time, but we are out there. Also, if I recall, before I went missing in action, you were about to stop cding and reconnect with your wife..

If that didn't work out sweetie - that doesn't mean the world is ending. It just means there is someone out there that is more suited to what you like! :hugs:

There IS someone out there for everyone.

Kris

[Stargirl]

Sometimes we can be by ourselves, and not feel lonely if we know that someone loves us. They may not be dancing happy circles around or doing handsprings, but we feel loved by someone. On the other hand, we can be surrounded by tons of people, and feel utterly invisible. Imagine having the opposite problem: Four people who want to be a part of your lives, and worrying that you might choose the one who is the least compatible. Janie on a good day might be worse than Lola on a bad day. No one wants to be with a mean tempered money grubbing floozie. And the Earth Mother type might bore your sox off. Relationships aren't easy. There are people who seem to have all the luck. Are they as interesting as the girl in an old gothic drama who runs toward the cliff shouting " I will NOT settle for the boring John Clopptwiddle" ?

[Suzy Harrison]

One thing I've learnt is that things can change - quite suddenly.

You may feel alone and lonely today but tomorrow you could meet the right person and your whole world could change in an instant.
So please don't let things get you down.


:hugs: Suzy

[Chryl]

well, I hope I do not end up alone, but being alone and being able to dress and do what I need to do is better than hiding everything and subjecting everyone to the moods when I can not dress.

I will still try and never give up, there seems to be females out there who will have fun with this "past time", it is a quest to find that one

never give up, a be happy with who you are

Cheryl

[harmony]

i have been a bachelor now for 24 years and alone.
but i am not lonely-i am good company!!

[LilSissyStevie]

I met my wife when I finally quit looking for someone. When I became comfortable with living by myself, there she appeared.

[Colleen Merryweather]

I am still looking for the crossdressing partners who will make all my dreams come true, and I know I am not the only bisexual woman who enjoys dating tgirls, transvestites, crossdressers... and all the other names and variations.

[Sonia_cd]

I have to say I too feel the same way. Whilst I don't rule out the possibility of finding an SO who will accept and support my CD'ing, I bring additional issues to the table in that I am asexual and simply have no interest in getting physical. That pretty much rules out most of the female populace out there I think. No matter though for I still have wonderful company, namely Sonia, and a few good friends who don't know about her but are good company for the male persona.

S

[ReginaS]

OK, I have been divorced twice with my crossdressing as a major contributor and have had other relationship problems with it BUT I truly believe that as I am becoming more and more comfortable with exactly who and how I am I will be able to attract a GG who is OK with me as I am. I kinda like being alone right now but I know it will happen. How lucky will some girl be to have a sensitive partner who can relate on so many levels, can fix things around the house and can dance in heels!

[Joann0830]

Kris and Suzy Harrison said it all, I always say if you look down you may never see that understanding GG in front of you that would enjoy being with you and share the fun. Joann0830:battingeyelashes::heehee::love:

BTW Welcome Back Kris and as Louis Armstrong said in his Song "Its so Nice To Have you back where You Belong"

[Joanie B]

, I bring additional issues to the table in that I am asexual and simply have no interest in getting physical. That pretty much rules out most of the female populace out there I think.
S

Sonia,
I actually saw one of those TV (no pun intended) magazines about the new asexuality. Some people are very happy without sex. So, you may find someone like you after all. Also, I am told many older women don't want sex any more, so maybe you have more potential partners than you think...

Hugs,
Joanie

[Sonia_cd]

Sonia,
I actually saw one of those TV (no pun intended) magazines about the new asexuality. Some people are very happy without sex. So, you may find someone like you after all. Also, I am told many older women don't want sex any more, so maybe you have more potential partners than you think...

Hugs,
Joanie

Thanks Joanie. Now that is encouraging I have to say. Only I have to move to another country soon :D No chance I will find anyone here...

And...if you don't mind my asking...by older you mean???

[Stormgirl]

I've come to accept the fact that I may be alone for the rest of my life, and would actually prefer that than a marriage of unhappiness. I don't see myself being happy with a wife,the kids, a nice house,a pickett fence, and the whole nine yards. I also don't want to grow old and alone, so I see myself deceased before the age of 60 as well. :)

[bEEb]

We come in alone and we exit alone. In between we can have meaningful and lasting relationships if we don't ask or expect too much of one another. Love comes in many different packages. Marriage is not necessarily the best one. I never figured to make it out of my 20's. So I didn't take as good of care of things as I might of. Live and learn to be a quick understudy..... "Life's tough, but it's even tougher if you're stupid"- John Wayne

[Angie G]

Good things come to those who wait hun. she will come along give it time. :hugs:
Angie

[Kate Simmons]

To clarify a bit, what I said was not out of frustration or from being depressed so much as it was making an observation. My being Salandra by it's very nature puts me above binary thinking. This is all mostly new thinking and concepts for me. It's one thing to talk about it, it's another thing all together to live it and process it. As I said before, it's "terra incognita" until I fully understand how it is supposed to work and unless I understand it myself, I cannot hope to explain it to others. Simply put, the nature of beings experiencing the third dimension is set up as binary as there is only limited space available to accomplish the purpose for being here. Going outside the "box" can be confusing and takes time to adapt to and living it is even more challenging.

Knowing the difference, can we be satisfied with less? We have to be willing to admit that most people, especially those we love and care about, may not be ready for this. While it can be somewhat disquieting, it is a fact nonetheless.:)

[deja true]

Cloptwiddle? OMG, stargirl! I dated that guy in high school and your right! How boring. A loser with a capitol "L". But, since she's transitioned and become a moderator here, she's a completely different person!

And Jenny Rotten and bEEb... Before I was 20, I knew I'd be dead before I was that terribly ancient and horribly straight arrow 40. Then when I was 40, I yearned for death before I was the totally crippled and disgustingly ugly 60. Well...My 60th b'day was last month and guess what? I get smarter and better looking every day! Can't wait tillI 'm as old as Joan Rivers! Not Larry King, though.

[DemonicDaughter]

This post inspired me to write another...The secret to finding/keeping a SO (http://crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=80368)


Sometimes we can be by ourselves, and not feel lonely if we know that someone loves us. They may not be dancing happy circles around or doing handsprings, but we feel loved by someone. On the other hand, we can be surrounded by tons of people, and feel utterly invisible. Imagine having the opposite problem: Four people who want to be a part of your lives, and worrying that you might choose the one who is the least compatible. Janie on a good day might be worse than Lola on a bad day. No one wants to be with a mean tempered money grubbing floozie. And the Earth Mother type might bore your sox off. Relationships aren't easy. There are people who seem to have all the luck. Are they as interesting as the girl in an old gothic drama who runs toward the cliff shouting " I will NOT settle for the boring John Clopptwiddle" ?

Beautifully put yet again my dear. You are such a joy to read and bring something so whimsical with your words that I cannot help but love you. And yes... I do believe that gothic drama you mentioned might have been about me, but I was thwarted at the cliff by a woman with an adam's apple in a tight black skirt and sexy heels. :)


Cloptwiddle? OMG, stargirl! I dated that guy in high school and your right! How boring. A loser with a capitol "L". But, since she's transitioned and become a moderator here, she's a completely different person!

OMG! YOU TOO?! I dated him too! And yes, I have to admit that since her transition to a moderator on here... well she's just been.... wow... :heehee:

[KarenSusan]

I am truly starting to wonder if it is our destiny for most of us to be alone. :sad:

That is certainly the way it turned out for me.

[tamarav]

The only reason to be alone is because you want to be alone. If you desire someone in your life to share all its glories and have an open mind (which is assumed at this point since we do what we do) you will walk right into someone.

I felt the same for a few years following my divorce, then I met the woman I have been with for over 23 years that has accepted and supported my feminine side (as well as wearing my clothes). Being alone may cause you to develop a more open point of view than you already have and allow you to accept some one else into your world.

Remember, if you want someone to share your world, you must share theirs. It took me a few years to get beyond the fact that I was not the only one in the relationship. It doesn't all revolve around me.

I think my pictures, that I tend to post at the drop of a hat, will show that happiness is attainable.

Your sis,

Tami

[bridget thronton]

I have been fortunate to find a women who loves me and I love her in return (this is independent of any cd behavior on my part). So I do not accept the premise that we are all destined to be alone (though, if my wife should die before me - I have no plans to seek a replacement)

[debbeelee1]

I am extremely lucky to have a great "keeper"! I'll never do anything to screw up this relationship!

[vivianann]

OK, I have been divorced twice with my crossdressing as a major contributor and have had other relationship problems with it BUT I truly believe that as I am becoming more and more comfortable with exactly who and how I am I will be able to attract a GG who is OK with me as I am. I kinda like being alone right now but I know it will happen. How lucky will some girl be to have a sensitive partner who can relate on so many levels, can fix things around the house and can dance in heels!

I agree Regina, a sensitive partner who can fix things around the house. I am noticing the GG's can pick up on our acceptance of ourselves, and our confidence of who we are. I really enjoy being feminine, and love it when GG's notice. I know it is lonely out there, but the right GG will find you.

[deja true]

I am noticing the GG's can pick up on our acceptance of ourselves, and our confidence of who we are.


VIVIANANN!

This is it! This is the key!

I read it in another thread a while ago too, but it didn't hit me like this has just now.
A fearful, wimped out demeanor is not, never has, never will be attractive to anyone, especially women (if that's who you're looking for).

But the supremely self-confident air (as long it's not the macho posing of the "wild and crazy guy" type, is something that attracts other's interest. It's a blend of charm, well spokenness and an air of self-reliance that makes people come to you.

Thanks, sis! This is a simple enough statement of yours, but another little epiphany for me. It's been a good week for epiphanies. Must be the moon or something.

deja

[Deborah Jane]

I,ve thought the same thing a lot in the past!!
But now i,ve learned to accept who i am i want to find someone to share it with.
A woman to love and cherish, who i know longer need to hide half of myself from...A soul mate who will understand me, while i in turn understand her needs and desires!!

[Pandora]

I would tend to disagree as I don't believe in destiny. We all have freewill to do what we want and life is what you make it. I've always found that if I wanted something bad enough I would somehow attain it. In a world of 6 billion+ people you can't believe there's absolutely no one out there. (that sounded like a movie trailer.) Don't give up yet Jeni.
:hugs:

[MJ]

yes i think I'll end up alone . just my luck . but you never know there might be someone out there there again pigs could fly too ..

[tricia_uktv]

Hi hon,

I'd just say "get out and do it"

I promise you won't be alone,

Hugs and good luck,

[Rita Knight]

Hi Everyone,
If marriage works for any reader, I hope it continues to bring you happiness. However, I don't think it will work for me. I got officially divorced in 1992 and have never really emotionally recovered from it. However, I never regretted getting divorced. I see a relationship requiring things I don't want to give. A hell of a lot of looking. If you do hit it off, a hell of a lot of maintainance. And I don't want to get burnt again.

Regina, you must be a real glutton for punishment if you were divorced twice.

Let it also be known that crossdressing has brought me a lot of friends and a whole social scene to discover.

Someone on this forum said this before, "I could not find the woman of my dreams so I decided to become her."

[Amy Hepker]

I do think the more we get out and about, the more people will accept us and find out more about us and not belittle us so much, I mean after all we are people too and not out to hurt anyone, just to be who we are. The thing is if we are going to want to be with Females and we want to dress like females, then we should meet females while dressed, that way there is no surprises.

[Tasha T]

Being alone seems to be my destiny. I've always wanted someone who loved me for who I am and vice versa, but I've never been able to find anyone like that. I haven't given up hope completely, but I've come to realize that with my unique combination of issues that the odds of me finding someone who can accept me for who I am are astronomical. I am used to being alone, and in some ways really enjoy it, but it would be nice to have someone in my life who cared about me.

[jennifer41356]

I am truly starting to wonder if it is our destiny for most of us to be alone. :sad:

Having been thru a divorce due to immaturity and raising kids with no me time'm starting to winder if I will ever meet a SO. :sad:

I may not have a wife or GF, but I have good friends, and my siblings and my folks are still around so i dont consider myself alone and it doesnt make me sad... I actually like it because I dont have to get someones permission to dress like a lady and i dont have to worry about her feelings and I can be a girl anytime I want:D:thumbsup::love::drink::Party2:

[goofus]

I may not have a wife or GF, but I have good friends, and my siblings and my folks are still around so i dont consider myself alone and it doesnt make me sad... I actually like it because I dont have to get someones permission to dress like a lady and i dont have to worry about her feelings and I can be a girl anytime I want:D:thumbsup::love::drink::Party2:

Yeah it is nice to be free to do what you want when you want. Then again, I wouldn't mind spending time with someone special. :2c:

[KateSpade83]

I'm used to being alone and alienated too.

[sterling12]

I sometimes think that keeping a lasting relationship is a lot like tending some exotic hot-house orchid. It requires constaint maintenance, vigilance, anticipation, clairvoyance, and oodles of love.

I've had my shots, been involved with a lot of women, and you know what? If it doesn't happen for me anymore, I can deal with being alone. Sometimes you have just been hurt too many times and the risks outweigh the rewards. And, joanie may be all of The Girlfriend I need. At least we are comfortable with one another!

Peace and Love, Joanie