First Post - I feel like an amateur here...

[Natalia]

I'm sitting in my living room during the morning news...kids off to school and wife doing erands...in a lovely flouncy pink knee length jersey dress and my wonderful C cup (almost perfect) falsies...

But here's the problem...

I look at some of the pictures of you beautiful girls, with lovely delicate features, your perfect hair, nails, and make up - there are a few of you that I would have hit on in my single years - you are indistinguishable from the real deal!

My face, with make up, looks like a bad halloween mask - I couldn't 'pass' (above the neck) at the Helen Keller school.:violin:

So I wear lovely clothes and look athleticly very female from the neck down...my wife yesterday told me she was jealous of my body and how good I look in some of my outfits...:battingeyelashes:

I am 49 but still have a 32" waist and my butt is still firm and "up"...(former Olympic wrestler - still in good shape after all these years)

But I haven't even tried a wig because it would just make me look like an idiot...

Is this a common problem? The closest I could come to passing would be to look like a halfling FTM...

Very supportive wife (really my best friend):hugs:- yesterday she found a pair of white garter stockings in her dresser and laid them out for me..."These must have been put in the wrong drawer"

[Annaliese]

I felt the same way a few years ago, I posted my first pics a few weeks ago. It just takes practice. It sounds like your wife is helping you, get her to help you with your makeup.

Hugs Anna

[JoAnnDallas]

I agree....get your supporting wife to help you. She can help you select a wig that will look good on you and can help you perfect your makeup.

[DanaR]

One of the things that I've found, it takes a lot of time to be a girl. Times when my wife and I have gone to a cross dress function, she takes her 5 minute to get ready and me my 1 1/2 hours. She is amused that I spend that much time.

Anyway it takes a lot of practice and time. If this was something you did every day, it might be easier.

[nikki47]

Hi Natalia,
I know how you feel some of the girls on here are stunning.I just spend hours practising my makeup and i am still my own biggest critic,nothing ever seems right,there are times when i think i look great and others not so good.
I will never give up because after 30 yrs plus i still love what i do.

Nikki

[harmony]

you should try a good transformation service-you could get surprised how they can make a silkpurse out of a sows ear!

[CharleneT]

I know how you feel, I am the same in many ways. I went "out" for the first time recently and I am sure almost everyone in the bar (went to see a band) knew I was a man. But, I did the best I could, they were quite nice to me and I loved the experience. The next time I will be better, I know that!! It takes practice to change our mannerisms etc, after all, we've been "men" for many, many years. Cannot happen over night, although that is my great wish!!!

[tamarav]

Dear Natalia,

Don't be fooled by the pictures. I put up my very best and I am still not satisfied. Any of the really good looking girls that post here will also tell you that it takes years of practice or at least a lot of practice to look more feminine. I have been at it for over 50 years and feel that I finally have achieved a pretty good look, but you will never see the thousands of crap pictures of the really bad makeup or the piss poor hair or whatever. You also never get a complete look anyway when you aren't completely dressed.

When I am getting ready I always take a few "just makeup" pictures. When I look back at them all I see is a guy in makeup, no female staring back at me. You need the whole personna to carry it through.

Get help, take makeup lessons, learn to walk in heels, learn to carry yourself in a feminie fashion, it all helps to put you in a softer place. Learn how to style your wig, how to sit, how to talk, all of those things simply take time and practice. We are all used to getting immediate gratification for our actions and this in not one of the things that it works for.

This in not like building a street rod where you order the frame, the body and the built crate motor and have someone else put it together for you. You must fabricate every part, build the motor from your own research and broken knuckles. This is a very personal voyage and it takes a lot of baggage packing to take it.

Take your time, learn from every source possible and tke small steps. It will come together very soon, trust me, I am a professional and I did stay in a Holiday Inn last night....

Go to my site and read everything you can and read every other site available. Pick up all the previous errors that others have made and learn from them. It will work.

Your sis,

Tami

[Kate-May]

Hi Natalia, you are certainly not alone in those thoughts.

I have to say that I look at some of the photos and simply sigh and wish that I could achieve what some of our sisters can. However I know my linitations and can achieve happiness at my level by wearing whatever I choose and, if I glance in a mirror, look from the neck down.

[debbeelee1]

Hi Natalia and welcome to the forum. Don't be so hard on yourself, you will probably look great with a wig, some make up and jewelry on. Give it a try and jump right in!

[DeeDeeB]

I know what you mean. My first attempts at makeup were more suitable for a circus clown. I've improved greatly over the past few years, but still not confident enough to post pictures here. There's lots of us in the same boat as you.

There's lots of good advice here. Follow the links to learn, and practice, practice, practice. And don't be afraid of the wig. I put it on last, and it really makes the transition complete.

Dee :doll:

[kaitlyna]

I'm sitting in my living room during the morning news...kids off to school and wife doing erands...in a lovely flouncy pink knee length jersey dress and my wonderful C cup (almost perfect) falsies...

But here's the problem...

I look at some of the pictures of you beautiful girls, with lovely delicate features, your perfect hair, nails, and make up - there are a few of you that I would have hit on in my single years - you are indistinguishable from the real deal!

My face, with make up, looks like a bad halloween mask - I couldn't 'pass' (above the neck) at the Helen Keller school.:violin:

So I wear lovely clothes and look athleticly very female from the neck down...my wife yesterday told me she was jealous of my body and how good I look in some of my outfits...:battingeyelashes:

I am 49 but still have a 32" waist and my butt is still firm and "up"...(former Olympic wrestler - still in good shape after all these years)

But I haven't even tried a wig because it would just make me look like an idiot...

Is this a common problem? The closest I could come to passing would be to look like a halfling FTM...

Very supportive wife (really my best friend):hugs:- yesterday she found a pair of white garter stockings in her dresser and laid them out for me..."These must have been put in the wrong drawer"

I feel your pain. Just a couple of months ago was when I started venturing into fully dressing and just as recently as a month ago I tried the make-up and wig. My wife did all of my make up (God I love her) and helped me pick out my clothes. When the make up was done and I had the wig on, I looked in the mirror. I guess I always thought I could somehow pass someday, but what I saw in the mirror would make Ed Wood wretch. The pictures that I took that night that I put on myspace were blurred in the face. Not for privacy issues, necessarily, but because I hated how mannish my face looked. :( Part of my problem, aside from the too high expectations, was the wig. I purchased some cheap Hanna Montana wig, just because I wasn't sure of how far I wanted to take dressing. Oddly enough, I'd attempted to purchase a $250 wig (ANGELICA by Noriko; Paprika color) that was on sale for $98 a couple of months back, but got a canceled order notice because the wig was out of stock. Last week it surprisingly showed up at our doorstep. I tried it on and WOW, what a difference. Not only did it make a HUGE difference in the look, but also how it felt. I instantly felt feminine. I put on my favorite blouse, skirt, bra, panties, and stockings, loaded up my female persona on RockBand and rocked out for 2 hours with my wife while dressed. I can't emphasize the difference the wig made. My wife even put my "hair" in a pony tail for me as it was getting in the way of playing (Did I mention how much I love this woman?). Anyway, that's my experience. Oh, and as an added bonus, my wife put on the wig that night because I've always wanted to see her as a redhead and.... WOW!!! It was intense, that's all I'll say.

Ciao,
K

[celeste26]

I used a transformation studio to produce the look in my avatar but what's inside counts almost as much as the outer layers. Enjoy your experiences while dressed, just get out of your own way and however they turn out and it will begin to make you more feminine.

There are hypnosis files on the web that might help if you want to try them out. I recommend www.allisoninlove.multiply.com/ but these files need to be listened to in a quiet situation not while things are going crazy all around you.

[Lilith Moon]

Several issues. Practice and confidence, of course. That is number 1.

Number 2. Most of us will typically take tens or hundreds of pics and post a handful of the very best in here.

Number 3. Many of us (but not all) use photo retouching software to iron out those creases or lighten that beard shadow.

You will get better at this as your confidence grows. If you have a trim firm figure you already have a head start. Find the beauty section, read posts, ask lots of questions. Above all, have fun. :hugs:

[Natalia]

You are all very kind...I live in the middle of Maine where just about everyone (my wife included) wears plaid - and not a kicky little plaid skirt...

We joke to each other that we are the perfect gay couple...I dress like a girl and she dresses like a male farmer...

This state is incredibly repressive and tight assed...in 2005 we finally passed a no discrimination law for lifestyles and this week a christian group announced a petition drive to revoke it. This would make discrimination based on orientation LEGAL again. Since 45% of my neighbors voted against the bill we now have, this little bit of bigoted heaven WILL be on the ballot.

There is absolutely NO WAY anyone could go out 'dressed' in Maine without getting into difficulties...Barny Fife and Andy would definitely arrest you (and later have to admit that they were mistaken). I could easily see my Yuk Yuk neighbors looking the other way from just about any form of violence, discrimination or what have you...

I envy those of you who have the freedom of geography...Miami, SF, NYC etc...

On the up side, we have 1,000,000 people in a state the size of all the rest of New England combined, so I can take LOOOONNNNNGGGG walks in the woods and never see another soul...(heck I can't even see a neighbor's window...)

As for help from my wife with make-up...she hates the stuff...LOL I am definitely much more fashion conscious than she...

There are no mirrors in the back wood of Maine!

[Nicki B]

The difference between an amateur and a professional is practice?

[deja true]

Well, Natalia sweetie...maybe you've gotta ugly puss, for now, but you do have something that many of us would even move to Maine for....an accepting SO that likes what you do and has fun doing it.

The cosmetic challenges of new hair or makeup are only temporary and can be overcome, like all the girls here say, with a bit of hard work. Don't worry about those things. They'll straighten themselves out as you progress with help from here.

Most important? Stay on good terms with your amazing wife. If it helps any, we all love her already and we haven't even met her!

respect & love,

deja

[joann07]

Practice does make perfect and in time you build confidence.
I've had help along the way and without that I know I wouldn't look how I am today.

Hugs!

[victoriamwilliams1]

It takes allot of practice and if you seen any first pictures of any of us you would be amazed. Now for some of he girls they come out the gates looking stunning. I know for me I am not quite there yet and it is a growth process for all of us plus it take practice.

[vanessatevesti]

Hi Natalia (nice name btw), it just takes practice practice practice and a few 100's dollars, that is for finding the right makeup and the right colors for your face: most gg's try them in-store so they can see how they look instantly. Sadly, many of us (myself included) had to buy a lot (I mean a LOT) of different brands of makeup, try it on at home, discard it and so on until we found the right one. Once you do find the makeup that best fits you, play with different looks.
Go buy some fashion magazines, many of them have tips and even makeup guides (or just search the internet for one). But one thing is for sure, the wig makes ALL the difference so don't be afraid to try one on, you'll find yourself completely transformed and I'm pretty sure you'll like the results!

[Angie G]

Well at lest we are dressing hun even if our faces don't look that good. :hugs:
Angie

[Fiona K]

Practice.
But do get a wig, it makes the most amazing difference once you have your hair on!!

[Ruth]

Natalia, passing in public as a woman, and dressing in private to express and enjoy your feminine side, are two different things. If you presently have no confidence in your appearance, just enjoy the private side of the activity and take your time settling in and becoming comfortable with your femme side. Experiment with make-up and wigs. At some point you will probably find a "look" that is acceptably attractive to you.
And when you are at ease with yourself, you will project a certain self-possession that will make you look better.
Sorry if this sounds rather vague, but it's kind of a holistic process and as others have said, we men have a good deal of work to do to achieve a reasonable feminine exterior.
You can have a lot of fun trying though!

[Sasha Anne Meadows]

hi dear.. you are embarking a wondrful journey...by all means get some nice wigs...that helps so much

[DonnaT]

The question is Natalia, do you really need the wig and makeup? If you feel good dressed up, even without them, then why fret over them. If you have no plans to go out, then why fret over them?

I only wear the wig and makeup when I go out to the clubs. I've been out without either, though. They aren't something I really need to feel good about myself.

As for the wig, if you haven't even tried a wig how do you know it would just make you look like an idiot? You never know what an appropriate wig and a little makeup can do for you, until you've tried.

Heck, some of us look pretty frightening as guys, but the right wig and makeup seem to hide it pretty well.

[danielle_from_cal]

I suggest that you at least get a wig. Give it a try. It really can improve your appearance far more than you might expect. Get your wife to help you find one that will suit your features. And don't go too cheap. If you get one of those $20 costume wigs you will look like crap. If you can afford it, look in the $100 to $150 range. You will find a lot of great quality products in this range (maybe a bit less on sale). It will change your life.

[Chari]

Natalia, As many here have stated, practice, practice, practice. It is great that your wife is accepting and helpful in your transition. IMO, trying on a wig, makeup, and dressing up are just small parts of understanding your feminine side. You have to find and add the conifidence, attitude, and comfort that suits you. Only you can say what is your calming level when you become Natalia. Sometimes it is tough when we become our own worst critic, so please post some pics if you need other opinions of your progress.

Enjoy life, Chari

[Natalia]

Many thanks for all the kind replies...

Especially for saying that you like my name!

The only restriction my wife has placed is the getting of a wig...but, every time I have pushed the chiffon envelope, she has caved and gotten turned on by the result...she once confided that she was attracted to a long haired brunette...

Long brunette wig? giggle giggle...

[DemonicDaughter]

None of us were born instantly knowing this stuff. We all have to learn. Don't worry, I bet you are more passable than you think. :)

[docrobbysherry]

It's ALL about "looks" for me. No matter how bad u think u look, I'm sure I'm much homelier AND much older! I solved my problem by cheating! My masks solved my "looks" problem.

That may not work for u, but something else will! Just keep trying and don't give up!

[Kris]

Natalia,

I just have to add to the practice practice stuff you've been told that MANY of the members here are really good with photo shop! Don't you think for a minute that everyone actually looks like they do in their pictures. They have photo shop and also pick the very best one out of a BUNCH to post up.

I am sure that with time, practice, and help from your lovely wife, you will do fine. And.. at least you aren't phony and use some software program to distort yourself.

Good luck!
Kris

[CD Susan]

Natalia, I have to agree with what else has been said here. You are very fortunate to have an understanding and supportive wife. Try to get her to help you with a wig purchase and to help you with your makeup. Some of us girls have learn this on our own but you are fortunate to have a wife who can help you. Let us know how things progress.

[Claire3]

Natalia,You are so fortunate to have an understanding wife.Time and patience is the key.My clothes came first and are still the most important part of my xdressing.My make up,wigs,jewellery,etc are secondary but a very special addition when i want to feel more femine.You'll get where you want to be.Dont put youself down and good luck.Love.Claire.XXX

[ReginaS]

It's all about presentation baby!
I think the first few times I tried makeup and wigs I looked rideculous but I kept at it and I sought out people to help me. Gradually, over time and as I could afford it, I added better and better quality makeup and wigs as well as jewelry and other accessories.
You can do it Sweetie!

[Stephanie Scott]

Natalia,

Trust me, sister, I know exactly how you feel! But it is important to understand a couple of things:
1) You will always be your own worst critic.
2) Since you have a wonderful supportive wife, I betcha she'll help with makeup and stuff that is currently unfamiliar to you.
3) Get the wig! It is HUGE for me to have it (my lovely wife bought it for me). Now I can't be dressed w/o it, because it makes me FEEL so much prettier (even if the reality is something else!)
4) Just BE happy about how you look and feel.Confidence and comfort in your own skin goes a long way toward determining how attractive you are to others. I have known many women who perhaps have average facial features but actually look very pretty because of their countenance, as it were. A bubbly, happy personality covers many physical flaws.
5) Have fun, enjoy the ride, and thank God for the blessing of a supportive and understanding wife.

God bless,
Stephanie