Has all CDer's had a same sex experience

[paulaluvssz8]

I am a hetrosexual. Very much in love with my wife. And lately on this forum I have noticed alot of the members are talking about having relationships with men and women. So it made me wonder how many CDer's have done this and is this a reason for some who CD to help them identify their sexual idenity...

[TV Wannabe]

No, but I am a little intrigued by it.

[tommi]

No but is my wifes biggest worry.

[DonnaT]

No but is my wifes biggest worry.

Same here.

[Marcie Sexton]

I noticed that long ago, I for one do not think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence...I perfectly happy with my sweetie and she is happy with me...

[Daphne]

Nope.:tongueout

[Rachaelb64]

Nope, I'm a happy hetrosexual with just a few 'kinks' :)

[Daintre]

I think it is mostly fantasy talk, I think that at some time during your life you may wonder, and that is just curiosity. If faced with a real situation, I personally believe that most would avoid a same sex experience.

[DawnRodgers]

I'm sure it is an individual preference - just as there are many types of sexuality among the po-pulation at large. It is affected by our upbringing, religion and a million other things.
I think, in my case, I just totally wanted to experiece everything from a feminine point of view. I weanted my appearance and personality to be as deminine as possible. Did thid lead me to sexual experimentatiom, was I always leaning that way, if I want to appear as femionine as possible is that the last step? All very good questions. The answers though are most likely determined by each and every individual and what they deeply feel about it.
Many never cross that line, some are intrigued, some repelled, some have no interest whatsoever, some jump in with both high heels. It does take all types to make a world.
Dawn

[Deborah Jane]

Don,t appeal to me!!

[MentalMercury]

not dressed- hot blooded straight male

dressed- hot blooded 'lipstick lesbian'

:)

[shalini_ukunge]

not dressed- hot blooded straight male

dressed- hot blooded 'lipstick lesbian'

:)

Ditto.

Shalini

[Julie York]

Nope.

[MarciManseau]

I'm totally bisexual and very proud of it. If I want to be with a lover, it's about the person, not what's between their legs. Everyone is beautiful and sexy in their own way - you just have to look. :2c:


Hugs 'n smoochies, Marci :hugs:

[Michelle-NC]

I am with Marci on this one.

[sandra-leigh]

None here. I wouldn't absolutely rule it out, but it isn't on my "43 things" list.

[DanaR]

not dressed- hot blooded straight male

dressed- hot blooded 'lipstick lesbian'

:)

Ditto!

Usually when I'm talking to someone that doesn't know me and the question always comes up are you gay? My answer is, if you mean when I'm dressed like this am I looking for a guy? The answer is, no I'm a lesbian.

This will bring on some strange looks, but then they get it.

[StayceeCD]

I've only been out a couple of times but in my limited experience going out around other girls, I see quite a bit of T Girls being with each other. To each their own but it's not for me. I'm married and hetero! :)

[karynspanties]

I am bi, wife knows. She kind of ignores it. We had one experience, her, me and another guy. She enjoyed it but does not want to do it again.

[SarahHall]

I am bi sexual and very comfortable with it.:hugs:

[Jenny J]

Nope, not interested in changing teams.

Jen

[TxKimberly]

Here's one I bet not many can say! I've only been to bed with one woman in my life - my wife of 20 years. I have no interest in men.

[Sophia KT]

Yes

Like other tvs most ['birds of a feather..etc'].

Women are okay and men...well :cheer:I have yet to find out.

Sophia:daydreaming:

[jaina]

I am a hetrosexual. Very much in love with my wife. And lately on this forum I have noticed alot of the members are talking about having relationships with men and women. So it made me wonder how many CDer's have done this and is this a reason for some who CD to help them identify their sexual idenity...

Even though so many here try to sweep it under the rug, gay and bi crossdressers do exist.

[Amy Hepker]

I am only interested in GGs. Guys Gross me out. I would not mind having CDers as friends to do things with, but Not sexual relations.

[Raquel June]

I am a hetrosexual. Very much in love with my wife. And lately on this forum I have noticed alot of the members are talking about having relationships with men and women. So it made me wonder how many CDer's have done this and is this a reason for some who CD to help them identify their sexual idenity...

Actions speak a lot louder than words.

First you have to realize that most CDs I've met have been in clubs that have drag shows which would mark them as gay bars in most people's book, so I'm not saying my experience applies to everyone.

But anyway, most CDs I've met have found time to mention that they were actually totally hetero guys (odd how many volunteer that info, seeing as I've never found myself asking).

And yet, these same CDs have also almost always made some kind of sexual advance towards me by the end of the evening, whether it's grabbing at me or trying to kiss me or just suggesting that they'd like me to do ... uhh ... something to them, or them do something to me.

I've often found myself leaving tables with CDs and hanging out with drag queens (ones who are 100% up front about being totally gay) just because they have better manners. I've witnessed astoundingly inappropriate (not to mention gay) bahavior from CDs who claim to be totally hetero.

Personally, I really don't care what people think of my sexual orientation. I'm attracted to girls, but I guess I've found myself attracted to a guy now and then. Hey, if he's doing a good job of looking like a hot girl, I'd feel pretty homophobic if I wasn't attracted to him. So I guess to be honest I'd call myself bi. But that's not something I let get too far very often. I've made out a little with a few CDs and queens, and I'm not a big fan of stubble, even if it's hidden under thick foundation.

But at the same time, I do like guys hitting on me when I'm en femme. I've never been hit on by a guy that I didn't think I could pretty much flatten if he got too persistant, so it's never been that uncomfortable ;)

[Ilovemyself]

Yes I have had a MMF experience with my wife and she initiated it. it was very important to her that I embrace my fem side and she is on board 100%!!!

[TGMarla]

I have not had a same-sex encounter, nor will I.

[deja true]

"...Even though so many here try to sweep it under the rug, gay and bi crossdressers do exist."

And it's generally thought that the percentages within the CD community are about the same as in the general population.

Some may get an impression that 'non-normal' behaviour is higher among CDs, but that may be because it's common to see 'girls' flirting among themselves or with guys. But that doesn't mean that many go any further.

Not that there's anything wrong with that!

[KatrinaAshley]

You can say I'm curious, but overall I have little attraction to either sex no matter which side of my personality is in control. Is there such a category for that?

[Jacqui]

Here's one I bet not many can say! I've only been to bed with one woman in my life - my wife of 20 years. I have no interest in men.

Kim, I'm one of the "not many." Don't take this as one-upgirlship, but I got you by 5 years!
It's nice to know, though, that I'm not the only one.

Men in fantasy, maybe, but definately would consider myself lesbianical; men in reality, nope!

[KateSpade83]

No men here, but I'd do role reversal with a woman. And then sometimes when I see a hot guy, I say to myself, - if I were a woman I tear him up! So it's only fantasy for me.

[battybattybats]

The most recent statistic I heard was that at least 30% of the Australian male population has had at least one consensual same-sex encounter!

Almost 1/3rd!

So are CD's more or less likely? I don't know. However because many fear the public perception of crossdressing as a gay thing a lot are very adamant about only liking girls.

Are many Bi and in denial? Quite possibly. But lets be compassionate about that. Plenty of people have trouble admitting that they are bi or gay just as many are closeted about being crossdressers. To themselves as well as to others.

Unless there is something about crossdressers that makes them less likely to be attracted to men than the rest of the population then we should expect at least 30% have had a same sex experience.

[Patty]

Nope

[jasmine57]

I'm Bisexual and proud of it. But my CDing has nothing to do with it. When I dress it's always alone. Not that I wouldn't enjoy the company of others, it's just that I haven't worked up the courage yet.

[Suzy Harrison]

Here's one I bet not many can say! I've only been to bed with one woman in my life - my wife of 20 years.



You're right there Kim, I haven't even met your wife, ...let alone.........er.........I'll go back into my corner now

[deja true]

You can say I'm curious, but overall I have little attraction to either sex no matter which side of my personality is in control. Is there such a category for that?


If you're into categories, it sounds like asexuality. About 1-2% of males are reckoned to be asexual, but little research has been done on this subject. It doesn't seem to fit in anywhere in the common peception of gender being a binary concept. Go figure!

There are a few others here who are asexual as well.

You're not alone here. Nobody is dear one...

This is a good subject for a new thread, hon. Wanna post it?

deja

[O2B Barbara]

Have no desire to be with a man. The thought of my wife always wins the lust contest with no competition!

[victoriamwilliams1]

Nope, I did meet an admirer and he was all hands for the five minutes we met. He kissed me and I was grossed out and it took months t lose that image.:eek:

[danielle_from_cal]

Okay, I will confess that I have been with a man. However, it is not part of my life now (or for the past 15 years or so). I enjoyed it at the time but, unless some fantasy man came along (and I don't even know what I mean by that), I will stay with my wife. She's too good to let go for anything.

[TxKimberly]

You're right there Kim, I haven't even met your wife, ...let alone.........er.........I'll go back into my corner now





ROFL - You know, I was read my post while looking at other responses and thought struck me that some wiseguy would probably take that ball and run with it. And what do ya know, it just HAD to be you Suzy! :hugs:

[docrobbysherry]

I used to think I was. Until someone asked this question:

What if u met a CD that was so feminine, so sexy, so desirable, and she looked like the girl of your dreams? Would u just blow her off, or maybe just fool around a little?

How would all of you "hetero" folks answer that one? Huh?

( My answer was, "Fool around"). Am I still hetero? Not sure now, how about u?

[LilSissyStevie]

When I was younger I was convinced that I must be gay since had some strange sexual proclivities and was a sometimes crossdresser. I just felt no attraction for men. My life probably would have been easier had I been gay but I learned to attract the right kind of woman.
:dom:

[kimmy p]

Even the thought of kissing a guy...Yuck! For those who are wired that way, I don't care, not my business. But for me, yuck.

[kimmy p]

Here's one I bet not many can say! I've only been to bed with one woman in my life - my wife of 20 years. I have no interest in men.

Maybe not many, but I qualify! My wife of almost 16 years (Next month) and I are each others one and only experience. Hell, we could be terrible at it and never know it but it's steel good. :tongueout

[marny]

This is a good start in your research. You will find some bi wherever you go, but I think among the cd community most are not. :battingeyelashes:

[CharleneT]

Hmmm... interesting to see what folks have had to say.

I've watched this ball get batted around in the "swingers" world and the results are about the same, with a twist... There, 98% of men state they are strait as an arrow, and 95% of the women say they are bisexual (well, often they say bicurious). In my experience, the number of bisexual folks in that group mirrors the rest of the society pretty well. About 20% of either men or women.

Now the GG's there often have sex with each other, but it also turns out to be much more entertainment for the men - not a real attraction. It is funny, with the swingers, the men are often pretty fearful of bimales, but will only have sex with another couple if the women are bi ?? I've never quite figured that one out. Often people fear being associated with alternate sexualities.

My bet: in about 15 years or so, maybe 20, the population will be much more tolerant of alternative sexualities and those that claim to be bisexual will likely be pretty common... what's the magic "real" percentage ? I wish I knew !


Charlene
p.s. just for the record, most "swingers" think CD/TG/TS etc are crazies.

[Raquel June]

So are CD's more or less likely? I don't know. However because many fear the public perception of crossdressing as a gay thing a lot are very adamant about only liking girls.

Are many Bi and in denial? Quite possibly. But lets be compassionate about that.

I totally agree with you. I like girls, but I could care less if someone thinks I'm totally gay. And I go through some really asexual phases. Maybe I'm straight, maybe I'm bi, maybe I'm an aspiring monk...

I just don't have much of an "ooh that's gross" feeling about anything. Well, God (and my therapist) knows I've had some encounters that bothered me, but I'm OK. I guess what I'm saying is, when it comes to sex, I'm never thinking, "I don't like that because it's gay." But I very often think I don't like something because it just doesn't turn me on. Sometimes for weeks I wonder if anything can turn me on. Sometimes I think just being desired by someone is better than the actual sex.

I do tend to emotionally put masculine or feminine twists on things. The few times I've been with a girl en femme, the way the evening progresses I usually end up being pretty aggressive, so the sex to me feels like I'm being very masculine. But then when I'm in regular guy mode, with some girls I'd say even 50% of the time I'm being very passive, lying on my back with my eyes rolled back in my head. So in a way I feel kinda gay when I'm just a regular guy being ravished by a woman, but I feel really manly and hetero when I'm dolled up and getting lipstick all over a girl.

I think I'm rambling and making no sense ... lol.

I think I know what a lot of CDs who are so adamant about being hetero are feeling, though... It's the whole, "I really don't think guys are attractive, but I want to be a pretty girl so much!" It's more trying to convince yourself that your feelings make sense when they really don't seem to on the surface.

[crusadergirl]

Just women for me either way i dress it don't change what i like.

[Delila]

I have had relationships with men and women. While the [U]idea[U] of having sex with a man while dressed is appealing it was not all that the fantasy lead me to believe. I would say that many not all cders have these urges i expect that at least some of them that follow through end up regretting it. I do not feel that being with a man helped me identify as a woman but that is just my experience.

[Pandora]

I would say no to having had a same-sex experience, although one time may remotely qualify. Well over 10 years ago when I used to question my sexuality due to my dressing (even though I had relations with women and loved it) I was out one night (drab) with a big group and one of our friends was a good looking gay guy. Somehow the two of us ended up at my house alone and we were pretty drunk (which you would think would lower inhibitions.) I pretty much said to myself that if I had any doubt I should just figure it out. I went to my bed and hopped in and he did right after me. I really gave it a chance but couldn't even bring myself to touch or kiss him. I had to hop out and go sleep in the guest bed. It's just not in me, but I'm happy I gave it a chance to know for sure.

I don't have to ask a gay male friend "why don't you like women?" anymore. (I did once.) If they feel towards women like I do towards men then I guess I understand. From that moment I think I started being alot more accepting of all people. We're all different and there's nothing anyone can do to change that. And it's probably a good thing. How boring would this world be if we were all the same? Very!

Cheers to all. :hugs:

[Jill Mac]

well i'd say i'm bi, i've had a few very brief bi encounters, one of witch was with a guy who knew i dressed, this made it even more exciting.I also get turned on by other cder

Jill

[dominique]

I'm 100% hetrosexual love my wife. It's just that I love to dress in female clothing.

[lusciouslisalips]

I would say no to having had a same-sex experience, although one time may remotely qualify. Well over 10 years ago when I used to question my sexuality due to my dressing (even though I had relations with women and loved it) I was out one night (drab) with a big group and one of our friends was a good looking gay guy. Somehow the two of us ended up at my house alone and we were pretty drunk (which you would think would lower inhibitions.) I pretty much said to myself that if I had any doubt I should just figure it out. I went to my bed and hopped in and he did right after me. I really gave it a chance but couldn't even bring myself to touch or kiss him. I had to hop out and go sleep in the guest bed. It's just not in me, but I'm happy I gave it a chance to know for sure.

I don't have to ask a gay male friend "why don't you like women?" anymore. (I did once.) If they feel towards women like I do towards men then I guess I understand. From that moment I think I started being alot more accepting of all people. We're all different and there's nothing anyone can do to change that. And it's probably a good thing. How boring would this world be if we were all the same? Very!

Cheers to all. :hugs:

You are very perceptive and correct in your assertions....lisa

[Melora]

I am Married, But..
Currious.. I have dreamed a bit though....About other T-Girls..
I love to Dream... Sometimes......

[alisontv_uk]

bi and happy. been in relationships with both and suppose call it lesbian CD relationships. been with my partner a few years now and are happy with the way we both are,.

alison x

[nikki47]

No Desire ever to be with a man.ugh

Nikki

[KandisTX]

Nope, not at all for me. I've got ZERO interest in a same sex experience.

Kandis:love::rose2:

[Glenda]

I have had one same sex relationship.......over and over and over. I had always been curious but afraid. I never acted on it until about 3 years ago when a friend and his wife (who I had also been intimate with before they met and sometimes after) stayed over. When he asked, I didn't say no.

I've turned down more than a few, but must admit there are others that I would not hesitate to be with if (or when) they ask. To me, being intimate with another is more about the other than the intimate.

And yes, after 3 years I am still occasionally seeing my friend and, on other occasions, his wife. I'm strange and not surprised that I would fit into a 30% profile.

[Sally24]

Here's one I bet not many can say! I've only been to bed with one woman in my life - my wife of 20 years. I have no interest in men.

Wow Kim, something else we have in common! (30 years for me) I doubt there are many of us "old school" girls around anymore!

As to the topic, I'm curious but married so it's not an issue. I do consider myself hetero.

[MsEva]

Here's one I bet not many can say! I've only been to bed with one woman in my life - my wife of 20 years. I have no interest in men.

I can Kimberly. Only one woman for me. We have been together for 33 years. Married 27years!:)

[Sally2005]

Nope not interested at all. Also, my wife is my one and only.

[Mona]

Like some others have said it is all about the person for me.

[bobi jean]

Paula
I have tried it. Not bad, Had a couple really nice relationships but after a few year or so of a Bi lifestyle I decided that the stress, was a extremely heavy, the pleasure was good but the stress just flat out weighed the pleasure. Maybe if I hadn't been married at the time (over 35 years to the same woman now), or I had found the right situation at the time things would be differant now. Not sure where I stand in the "LABEL" catagory now, but I used to be straight, then I was Bi and now Im straight again. Call me what you want, I'M A CROSSDRESSER AND LOVE IT.

[LindaMarie]

Here's one I bet not many can say! I've only been to bed with one woman in my life - my wife of 20 years. I have no interest in men.

Married and faithful to the same amazing woman for almost 27 years.

[TxKimberly]

Wow Kim, something else we have in common! (30 years for me)

Married and faithful to the same amazing woman for almost 27 years.

I can Kimberly. Only one woman for me. We have been together for 33 years. Married 27years!:)
Wow, congrats girls!

[robbie]

Nope, never and do not want a sexual relationship of any type with a man. Now, women, often, many, all at the same time. Maybe dressed in matching panties while we do it.

[Scotty]

I am a hetrosexual. Very much in love with my wife. And lately on this forum I have noticed alot of the members are talking about having relationships with men and women. So it made me wonder how many CDer's have done this and is this a reason for some who CD to help them identify their sexual idenity...

I've thought about it, but I consider myself TG or somewhere in between.
While an opportunity did present itself, he was a friend.

But unless an opportunity presented itself I've been hetero to date....:)

[KellyCD]

Wow I guess I one of few here then, I am bisexual. I don't normally mention it to the whole world (I can't anyway-you gurls know why), my wife is bi as well.

I have had a few "encounters" with a man-my best friend-and I loved it. My wife knows about if you people must know, she had no problem with it.

Would I do it again? Yes.

[deja true]

I like women.

I find men repulsive... not attracted at them at all...


But how 'bout a man that looks like a good lookin' woman?


Hmmmm?

[MarinaTwelve200]

I'm strictly hetro. Its important to realize that not ALL CDing is sex or sexuality based. We are NOT dealing with CD as ONE condition here, but rather several DIFFERENT psychological conditions thay only share CDing as a common element, and for different reasons.

Transsexualisim, fetishisim, escapisim and "taboo tripping" are all very different examples in where those affected might wear the clothing of the opposite sex, but not even remotely for the same reasons---

No general statements can be made concerning CDing as it is not a thing in itself, but rather a common response to a variety of conditions, just as a cough or fever are symptoms common to several unrelated ailments

[deja true]

... just as a cough or fever are symptoms common to several unrelated ailments



Don't really like that analogy, Marina, but I get it.

You a pro psych person?

[Staci]

I am only interested in females. Whether dressed or not it does not change who I am.

[Sarah Doepner]

nope, probably never will.

[Crystal Alberta]

If you had asked this question a few years ago, I would have said that I was 100% straight. Now I'm not so sure. I've never had an encounter with a man, and at this point I don't think I'd go out of my way to have one, but if something were to come up, then who knows . . . I might give it a go, especially if he were dressed as a woman.

Crystal

[Sugar]

I'm with you honey. I'm about the person, the moment, the sparks flying.

I feel the need to make a disclaimer. I've been in a relationship with a post-op transexual. She was great. My only other relationships have been with GG's. They were great too. I never cheated on any of them.


Sugar




I'm totally bisexual and very proud of it. If I want to be with a lover, it's about the person, not what's between their legs. Everyone is beautiful and sexy in their own way - you just have to look. :2c:


Hugs 'n smoochies, Marci :hugs:

[AmandaM]

I tried it, it was okay, didn't do it again. And I "had to be" a woman while involved. Couldn't see a man-and-man thing. That thought was turning me off at the time.

[Lora Olivia]

Amazing to me that so much research (Kinsey etc.) has shown that many men have had a same sex encounter and yet it seems that the cd community seems like very few. Is it really that way or is it a biased question. For me i have long said i was ambisexual...could do it with either hand....in reality I am bigendered and for me to be fulfilled instead of just (him) being gratified a hetero (me being with a man) encounter may well be desired and may never be consumated

[DonnaWanna]

Yes, I have had a same sex experience more than once while cd'ing and it was very pleasureable.

[jessbcuzz]

No! My rear end is marked "exit only, do not enter"!

[Billijo49504]

KIM, As I've said before, my first died of cancer, after 13 years. And my next has been going for 23 yrs and we are going for 24, on Nov 9. She is my world. A long time ago, she told me, I don't care what you drag home, as long as it's not another woman. Well there have been jeeps, rabits and many dogs. I've now settled for rescued grey hounds. And I just last week hauld home a 14 ft fishing boat and motor. She said wow!! We can go fishing. How can you beat that attitude...BJ

[paulaluvssz8]

The question was not to judge any of you. But thanks for being so open to us all here.

My wife isn't tolerant to CDing, a very unforgiving person. A small town girl who was raised very conservitive. And I have been encouraged by others here, to have her to come here for support. She ask the question when I opened up to her about my CDing, "Are you Gay?" Well NO.... But that is her perception due to society and its stance on the subject. My fear if she were to come here that she would assume that her fears were true and that I was gay because there are some here that are BI or Gay. I am not judging you and I want you all to be very happy in what ever your life brings to you. I just wanted to express my fears about the site.

[kaitlyna]

Well, I'm not quite sure what label my sexuality would get, so I'll avoid that for now. I've had sexual encounters with a couple of men; best friend, friend and his wife, even one on one with a gay man. I've never done it while dressed, though that is something I'm interested in someday. I would love to be with an understanding guy and my wife while dressed. While I do enjoy sex with other men occasionally, I'm not necessarily attracted to them. I'll elaborate; Sexual acts are fine, but I'm not into kissing and I don't really look at guys and think "God he's hot". I can recognize when a guy is attractive, but don't look at them nearly the way I do when I see a smokin' hot woman. Luckily my wife is bi and very understanding and accepting of me just for me. In fact when I asked her, before I told her about my experiences, what her biggest sexual fantasy was she said it was to see 2 guys together. Well, did I have a surprise for her. Of course one of the hottest things for her is to see 2 guys kiss, and that's the one thing I don't really care for. I guess if I had to label myself, I'd probably say bi with a bit of favor towards the female half.

[missattitude]

yes. i love men. i am a gay wouldnt have it no other way

[Raquel June]

Wow I guess I one of few here then, I am bisexual.

I don't think it's that few. I guess I shouldn't speculate about numbers, but straight CDs are much more likely to talk about their hetero-ness (out of defense for the inherently kinky non-hetero image of CDing) than bi CDs are to talk about their bi-ness, and there are definitely bi CDs who claim to be totally straight.

There's this stigma about bisexuality. People think bi means "I'll screw anything that moves," when (for males) it's more likely to mean, "I may not be particularly attracted to guys, but I'm just not hung up on labels and I'm not worried whether people think I'm gay or not." In that context, straight guys are more likely to be worried about being viewed as gay, so they're more likely to mention that they're straight.

There's also a difference between your occasional thoughts and your reality. If you're (a male) bisexual, as soon as you get into a monogamous relationship with a woman, you really should be considering yourself hetero out of respect for the woman you're with. And vice versa, if you're bi and you're in a monogamous relationship with a guy, you need to consider yourself gay because anything else is basically an attack on your partner. You can't be bi-sexual if you're only sexual with one gender.

I suppose there should be another category ... straight-curious? I'm not grossed out by the idea of sex with a guy, but I don't find guys attractive. If I'm en femme I might do something with another guy en femme, but I'm not going to be weird and creepy and aggressive about it. To be honest, what really turns me on is feeling like someone's really into me, so maybe I could fool around with a guy, but I could never take seriously the idea of an actual relationship with a guy. I think we all want some kind of long-term loving relationship, and I do think that falling in love with another guy is something that could never happen to me.

I think a lot of what CDing is is about the gender roles where girls get to be the pretty ones and guys are supposed to chase them around. I wanna be the pretty one and have girls chase me around. I guess that's not gonna happen, though.




No general statements can be made concerning CDing as it is not a thing in itself, but rather a common response to a variety of conditions, just as a cough or fever are symptoms common to several unrelated ailments

I dunno, I think we've all got closely related fevers ;)




No! My rear end is marked "exit only, do not enter"!

:rolleyes:

That wasn't the question... I've never been "entered" by a guy, but I've done a few things that would be considered a same sex experience.

[Chrissy8888]

This is just my way of thinking. I am not really attracted to guys. I am women though. However what I look for in a women is a girly girl. I do think some of that is my cross dressing. I have experimented with a guy once. It was not super sexual in any way, just mostly oral stuff. When I walked away from this I was left neutral. Which is different than what I thought. I figured it would be one of two scenarios. I would either be head over heels with the experience or so sickened that I would need psychological help. Instead it was like OK, I didn’t really enjoy it, but I didn’t hate it either. That was about 5 years ago. Now I am kind of at a point where I really would just like to find somebody (male or female) that loves me and accepts me for who I am. I will always have that fantasy of having hot sex with a man. I have these feelings when dressed and in drab. Having said that, that I have same feelings about women. Am I bi, gay, bi-curious, or totally straight? You know what I don’t really know or care. Forget the labels, at least for me. I am sure that there are some that want sex, hey who doesn’t. I just want to be loved and cared for and return the same feelings and emotions to my partner. I don’t walk down the street and think that all guys are hot, but I don’t walk down the street thinking that all women are hot either. I look at the person. So what happens is what happens. I will be fine with it.

[KatherinePaige]

I have never had a same sex experience but when I dress the urge is very strong, with that said I couldn't bring myself to have a encounter with a masculine dressed male, She would undoubtedly have to be En Femme.

[battybattybats]

Perhaps we should have an anonymous poll and encourage everyone to vote. A survey of posting members to see what the demographics here actually are?

[Farrah]

My wife only!

[ReginaS]

I have never been with a man and have been only in relationships with gg's but there is some level of fantasy around being perceived by a man as a beautiful woman and, while there is not much I would do sexually, I do think I would *please* a man. It seems like it would be a feeling of feminine power.

[Eva Marie]

. . .about having relationships with men and women. So it made me wonder how many CDer's have done this and is this a reason for some who CD to help them identify their sexual idenity...

Paula prefaces two questions with, " . . . having relationships with men and women." If we take this literally, then it must be a threesome, but we're left to guess about what sort of relationship. Nonetheless, my answer is "yes", however it may be interpreted. The second question must also certainly be "yes" because "some who CD", as several have already reported, are "hetero" when "in drab" and "bisexual" when "dressed". On that one, I'll go along with the crowd. (I must miss grading papers.)

[Lucypink]

I am Happy as I am, but I want to be Lucy for a full weekend, going out for shopping, dinner and night clubing with some CD Friends, and next day start as Lucy with breakfast just to do every thing all over again. I do not think that being with another men will make any diference for me.
I have never been atracted or been with a man. So far I am not intrested in men, but I do not discard the posibility that I could meet a CD that changes my mind in one of this weekend adventures...
Lucy.

[Maddie]

kim i am like 36 yrs only 1 woman

i love her deeply

also i know from expirence that guys are messy (giggle)

Maddie

[Raquel June]

I feel that we are all born bi and it is just the environment and social constriants put on certain people that they feel they have to conform to what they believe is normality.
Don't you find that those who claim to be very macho and Hetro are the ones that really have desires for a "gay" relationship or experience.

I think that's going a bit far to say the super-macho types are secretly gay (a lot of people say that).

I heard a few Loveline shows where Dr. Drew talked about a study where they gave many people ... well, I forget what kind of a scan it was. I don't think it was an MRI or PET scan, but something where you could see brain activity. Anyway, female brains didn't have much of a reaction to seeing porn, but when talking about relationships their brains would totally light up. Males brains would totally light up when looking at porn, in the same way it would for any other major biological drive. Then most males that were shown guy-on-guy porn would have the reaction of a severe threat, like their life was in danger.

I'll have to find one of the shows again, because it's a little fuzzy. But the point was that those reactions can be linked to being legitimately scared of and threatened by gay-ness (not just simply "not into it"), but it's not the same as secretly liking it.

[akaCathy]

I've enjoyed the company of men while dressed in drab and also a CD sister where we were both dressed. I look at the person and not at the sex. I have been married a very long time and love my wife dearly. We enjoy a wonderful and loving relationship. I told her of my bisexuality before we wed. I have yet to experience a man while dressed, but would love to experience this side of my femininity.

[MarinaTwelve200]

Don't really like that analogy, Marina, but I get it.

You a pro psych person?

I was reluctant to use that analogy too, but I couldn't think of anything else at the moment.---Notice I use the word CONDITION rather than "disorder" to describe motivations for CDing. I AM sensitive about things myself.

No, but I have had a life long interest in Psych. I have also had Psych courses (which I ACED, BTW). I didnt like the work prospects for Psychology, so I got my advanced degrees in one of the "hard" (rather than "fuzzy") Sciences.

I have my own take on Psychology---after reading all I can and could on the subject, usung the data and applying hard science techniques to it---rather than build on the early theories developed when much less was known about the mind---which still prevail today.

My own work with Artificial intellegence models has further refined my ideas on how the mind works, and I have made several interesting discoveries on my own (some of which I see varified in the work of other people)

Not to be bragging, I would put myself up against ANYBODY in the feild of Psychology and Functional analysis.

[mattie]

I consider myself completely heterosexual. And when dressed, I suppose I become a lesbian :)

[Jazzmine]

Just women for me thanks!

I've wondered about whether there is a bi side to me. All my sexual fantasies are with women, and in particular, my wife. The gay or bi thing just doesn't get me going, in fact has the opposite effect, even when dressed.

I can understand the visual/emotional turn on of being dressed and acting like a women. I get that side of it, but my fantasy would be to have a woman enjoy this experience with me, not a man.

Also, everything about women turns me on. On the other hand men seem clumsy and gross in comparison. To take it further, sexually I see other men as competitors for the women I would/could fall in love with, so in this regard my attitude is like a hot blooded male or lesbian protecting their loved one. It's kind of hard to then be attracted to a man after that!

Now having said all that, I have seen some stunning ******** etc that are just beautiful looking women. Knowing that they are anatomically men puts me off somewhat, but I do feel totally jealous of their undeniable sex appeal. And you have to wonder, as an open minded CD, how you would react if you had fallen for a beautiful woman, only to find she was once a he. Certainly would put the tomcat amongst my feathered desires!

Hugs Jazzmine

[EveMarie]

I had my first (shall we call it "experimental") encounter with a male partner when I was 16. Since then I have found I am "Bi" in the sexual area, but as far as relationships I have been a strict heterosexual. I love being a woman, I love looking at mens asses , and love even more being with a woman as a woman. I have been married 4 times, never to a man, have had affairs with a man, but don't think I could ever live with a man as a "partner" or otherwise.

I am the true cliché - A lesbian trapped inside a man's body.

:battingeyelashes:

[Raquel June]

mrsb1975:

I'm not sure why you deleted your posts...

I don't think we're on different wavelengths. I just think when you say things like "everyone is born bi," many people (mostly the people who are hardcore about their hetero-ness) will either get very defensive or else totally tune you out. It's a biological fact that many men are extremely threatened and horrified by the idea of doing something gay. I think it's correct to call that homophobia, and many people have it; it doesn't make you a bad person -- but the term homophobia is often associated with hatred (not necessarily true), so there's another reason that homophobic people will get defensive because they don't necessarily hate gay people.

Anyway, I think to be honest I would have to apply a label of somewhat non-practicing bisexual to myself. I'd like to be a pretty girl, sleep next to a girl at night, make out with whoever I want on the weekend, and be left the hell alone the rest of the time. I'm thinking that's too much to ask, though.

[Megan (VA)]

I am bisexual with more of a physical preference for men no matter how I am dressed. There is just something about the way they feel, the way a fit chest, calves and butt look, they way they touch me, the way they smell when aroused, just their way, that gets my motor humming. I'm picky though, I like men who take care of themselves physcially, can take care of me and can carry on a decent conversation.

But I know I like women too. For me, this is more complex because for me with women it is much more about who she is as a person. With women I can much more easily overlook some things because with women it is our relationship, usually the intimacy of our friendship that ignites a sexual spark.

[tanya3]

I am bi sexual and very comfortable with it.:hugs:

i have only had one same sex encounter i really enjoyed it and would do it again given the chance .

[kaitlyna]

Does anyone find that they would only entertain the idea of being with a man while they're dressed?

[deja true]

Does anyone find that they would only entertain the idea of being with a man while they're dressed?



Well...so far that's exactly it! sort of.....maybe.....kind of.....i guess


???

[~Seana~]

Warning: This post is likely to be long, and test some social boundaries. Skip if you dont want to read it all

because it likely wont make sense otherwise ( and even then).

I'd consider myself a society induced baby bi. I cross a number of society's boundaries in my life, starting with my

interest in bdsm. I'm primarily dominant with my partners but that doesnt necessarily mean I'm strictly that way. I

filled the role of a submissive/heavy bottom for nearly 13 years. During that time I was with a partner who often

ridiculed and feared homosexuality. We had discussed bisexuality at various points and i had admitted that I

harboured some bicuriousness and was often made fun of for that. Add to that that I come from an extremely

strait-laced family and you can see some of the societal pressure areas to conform. We really are taught from birth

to conform to societies rules and two of them happen to be not to crossdress and not to have sex with the same

gender.
Now here's the strange thing. I didnt crossdress especially for almost 10 of those 13 years, and when i did it was

in secret, for fear of being belittled for it, which did eventually happen . But I did have some bisexual fantasies, and they had to do with my submissive side . And even stranger still I've never explored these fantasies, when I have been with men I've been dominant.Perhaps there's still some fear or apprehension there, but I think it's something I WOULD do now.
Now contast that environment with where I stand now. I have explored my bisexual side ( and embraced it) but I really could not...and would not...have done so without the assistance and support and yes a fairly good shove by my present partner and you can see what a HUGE effect the environment around us has on what we are willing to do.
Now the human brain is a strange and wonderful thing. Often when we do supress some things they come up in other and sometimes innapropriate places. We on this board are our OWN society to a very large degree. And we are supportive of one another and try to shy away from degredation or belittleing others. I would be really not be surprised to find that we have a larger percentage of gay or bisexual members here, and that the number would likely exceed what would be indicated by self -reporting as at least one person seems to ave indicated when they mentioned they are often approached by people who said they were strictly heterosexual. This would indicate to me at least that normal societal pressure still has an effect, even in our smaller society. I have srtrong suspicians that the " it will come back if you try and stop" aspect of crossdressing is closely related to bisexuality, and it may well be that a large percentage of those reporting such that may explore bisexuality. Some will conced to whichever societal pressures ( be that from a spouse , the general society or from here) others will resist more or not be willing to admit it ...even to themselves. And you dont necessarily have to like the look of men to be bisexual either. I dont look at most men that way, in fact I do tend to look for feminine qualities in my guys like nice hips and feminine facial features but I think that has more to do with THEIR having a good time than mine as odd as that sounds.

I'd be really interested to see what a poll would say. I think it would HAVE to be anonymous. And even then the results wouldnt be anywhere near scientific but may indicate a higher percentage here than elsewhere. Some psychiatrist who's name escapes me ( and that someone here will probably come up with the name of) said that it's somewhere near 10% but there's argument these numbers arent accurate either. But I think even in this thread we've seen far in excess of 3 % which is another number I've seen bandied around. The cause and effect here could be from any number of factors, including menal openness to ignoring societies regulations

So in short:
yes i'm bisexual
I enjoy it tremendously.
I think there would be a hefty number more bisexuals or homosexuals if it wasnt a sort of societal taboo.


Amanada
The Happy ****!

[flacindycd]

Yes I do enjoy both sides of the aisle....but to eaches own I suppose. I sit squarely in Amanda's camp...

On another note, I CAN differentiate between sex and love, you can have sex without love, just as you can have love without sex...sometimes we are lucky where where we can have sex & love if we are lucky(as I do with my wife) however I do enjoy sex with others but...I feel the only 1 I can and do truly LOVE is my wife...confused?... you betcha!!!!!! most of us gurlz always are...:)

[racquel]

Lately I have been having a desire to introduce another man into our love relationship.I believe that my femininity ie having my breasts against hers, has detracted from my wife's ability to experience a true orgasmic episode as she would experience while with a 'real' man,
I also imagine being used sexually by this man as the sissy I am.:o

[bobbi sue]

i am married and bi i have not been with a man for 20 plus years but my dressing does seem to bring out the woman in me that wants to be with a man.

[Tammy298]

Nope, strictly hetro. I've had fantasies about being with another couple (or woman) but still hetro.

[ConnieLove]

aaaaaaall male,but dress me up anything can happen

[angelfire]

I would use the term 'heteroflexible' or even bi-curious. I've never been with a guy before, but I would consider it if the circumstances were right. I'd be open to a relationship with a TG also.

[LisaLedoux]

When I am dressed I am a woman...in all respects including responding to a man.

[gueebster]

My first proper forum post, hooray.

I have only had sex with girls, but i've kissed a few boys. The way i feel about that experience is a good microcosm for how i feel about hetro/homo sex in general; beautiful, well build, sexy men and women attract me equally as much, and my fantasies are divided between the two depending on my mood, but i ENJOY having sex with girls more, because they're generally much softer and sensuous.

I've always wanted to have sex with a very hot boy with an amazing body while i was in the utmost of ****ty CD. That would blow my mind. He would have to be incredibly sexy though - a prime statuesque male, not simply a male for the sake of it. Being treated like a girl but a breathtakingly sexy man would make me feel incredible.

Give me a soft curvy girl any day of the week though.

sorry if that was fence-sitting. I'm too open minded sometimes.

[Nicki B]

I am a hetrosexual. Very much in love with my wife. And lately on this forum I have noticed alot of the members are talking about having relationships with men and women. So it made me wonder how many CDer's have done this and is this a reason for some who CD to help them identify their sexual idenity...

I guess I'm unusual, particularly these days - I've only ever had sex with one person, and we've been a partnership for 28 years now (legal for 23).

Personally I've never fantasised about sex with any man - but I've been known to flirt on a few occasions... :whistling:


But as to 'has all CDer's had a same sex experience' surely that's like saying 'have all men', or 'all women' - the answer is bound to be down to the individual? :strugglin

[Laurelanne]

No, but I am a little intrigued by it.

My wife too is worried about it, we have had 3somes in the past with other guys well twice, and once i did perform with HIM for her I am BI but I dont push that onto her .Im happy 2 be with her sexually as long as I can be ME>>>:devil:

[Stephanie Anne]

I wonder if gay men have similar stereotypes as we do about them?

Why such a fear of homosexuality I wonder? I don't buy into the lesbian when dressed thing but that tis just me and I don't think I could say it was wrong.

My feelings change as often as my mood I guess. I was born a man. I do not consider myself a crossdresser. I am more attracted to men than women.

When I was a child I was raised to believe homosexuality is a moral sin. as I grew up I associated with gay communities more than straight.

As I got older I still had an almost subconscious apprehension of homosexuality much like a hidden voice saying "hate gays".

Over the last several years I have finally given up that foolishness.

I have never slept with a man and for the last I do not know how many years, have not had sex period. I just did not feel like it.

I find women attractive but no longer in a purely sexual way. It is more an admiration when i see a very beautiful and attractive woman, I appreciate her.

When I see a very beautiful man it is more sexual but I could never see myself as a man with a man. Not because I see it as wrong but because at my core I have a soul, if I believed in such, as a woman and it is as a woman I want to have a relationship.

I don't know what that makes me nor do I really care. Sex is not my driving force and attraction is attraction regardless of the gender of the person.

I would prefer a long term relationship with a wonderful man but only as a woman.

I would and could have sex with a woman but I just do not think I could have the same deep feelings as I once thought I could.

This is why I think living life without barriers of sex and orientation is so much healthier, it allows us to truly grow.

[Seville]

Nope!

[kristiCD]

I consider myself bi but attracted to females. I would never want to kiss or cuddle with a man. I have never fallen in love with a man. But I have been sexually submissive to a man (use your imagination) and loved it. I have never been with a sexy CD but would like to try.

[laura.lapinski]

When I was young, 12-14, I had sexual relations with one person, the same person each time. Even during that time I was never attracted to males, always looked at Penthouse magazines, etcetera. I think it was just being young, horny, and getting release with someone I knew well and was comfortable with. I have always regretted having done that, but I must admit that the one time I took it from behind it was physically stimulating. I've never done it with another male since then. I've had fantasies when dressed, but as soon as the fun is over, its the last thing I want to think about. I am entralled by the female body. In a fetish type of mood, if I was dressed sexy, and a femenine looking CD came around, and the planets were aligned, I might consider it, but I'm afraid I would regret it later, so I stick to fantasy and am satisfied with that.

Laura

[flatlander_48]

Here's one I bet not many can say! I've only been to bed with one woman in my life - my wife of 20 years. I have no interest in men.

Close.

2 women, 5 men

1st wife, married 30 years, divorced
2nd wife, married nearly 3 years, seems to be working out

All the men were about sex. Fun, but no long term relationship was pursued. 2nd wife knows all about me and it's not a problem. The last time I slept with a man was several years before I started crossdressing.

[Michelle 51]

No guy,s for this girl.

[Desiree2bababe]

I have and only while dressed. Yes, it did "complete" the process. Just as my wife presumed "Why go to all the trouble with makeup, jewelry, clothes" if not to attract a man. Being wanted and desired is fun no matter how you are dressed and to know you've pleased someone, makes the experience all the better.

[CaptLex]

Why go to all the trouble with makeup, jewelry, clothes" if not to attract a man.
To attract a woman who likes women? I guess I don't get that thinking - not all men are into women, not all women are into men, right? :idontknow: Whatever floats your boat. ;)

[Janet Bern]

When dressed I am a lesbian. when not hetero. Dont have the desire for a man at all. Thought about it ... Naaa!

[Julogden]

Other than a bit of kissing, no. I'm mainly attracted to females, but occasionally have been attracted to other TG women.

Carol

[Susan Smith]

Not interested in men. Been married to the only two women i've ever had sex with.

[EveMarie]

I am Bi all the way. I had my first "encounter" with a man when I was 16. I was a gymnast in highschool and wasn't into dressing like I am today. then I would (please forgive me) hitch-hike on Sunset Blvd. and be just as comfortable with a man who wanted sex, or to take pictures, etc. (in the late 60"s this was almost the norm in Hollywood). Now (I'm 56) I still enjoy sexual activities with men and women, but my "Love and Romance" and emotions belong to my wife.

xxx, Evie

[Sinthia]

I think that women are so 'absolutely wonderful' that I would never want to be with a guy. But to each his own.

[me2]

Up until now I have only been with women but I have been Bi for probably most of my life. And if I ever meet a guy that im comfortable with I would really like to have the experience. It will have to be right and in a relaxed atmisfear but im going to have an encounter sooner or later. I think it would real nice to have my first experience with a couple and I would like it to be more of a love making session. As I say, it would have to be right.

[vivianann]

never been with a man, and never will. I love women always whether I am dressed as a male or female.

[dakota_ann69]

sorry gotta say that I am 100% hetero.

[satin_luva]

I've always been attracted to women. There are some that I've been close to and known that I will never get anywhere with them sexually and it makes me feel angry and alone. But lately I have been semi-fantasizing about giving men oral sex. It seems like more fun then oral sex with women. I'm yet to do either. I don't like the thought of being gay, though. All the social stigma would drive me to suicide. What do you have to say about this?

[Annemarie]

Well...perhaps crossdressing could be interpreted as a form of unconscious homosexual behaviour.Witness the vigour with witch most CDs deny any homosexual leanings...

[ErikaLadyoftheDesert]

I would like to believe that most CD's are very open-minded people and are all-inclusive; Therefore we have some gay, bi and straight in our mists!

Me personally I am bi, but have only a few experiences with men.
Like satin_luva above, I did "fantasize" about giving oral to a man many, many years before I actually had the opportunity to put my fantasy into reality. It is something I really enjoy doing with another man, actually it is the only "sex act" that I will do with another man. :heehee:

[CaptLex]

I don't like the thought of being gay, though. All the social stigma would drive me to suicide. What do you have to say about this?
I'd say that's pretty sad. :sad:

[cinderellaman]

Put me down as VERY bi-curious. Whether dressed or not. Would not say no under the right circumstances. Would LOVE to find another cd'er to try this with:devil:

[onceinawhile]

I hear a lot of you speak of your wives and how kind and supportive they are. My wife and I of almost 10 years are splitting up; the divorce is almost final. She threatens me constantly about my crossdressing (e.g. calling my job and telling my co-workers) The thing is, while I did crossdress before we were married, and I was single; I stopped doing it during the marriage. She only knew because I told her. I guess at this point I am distrustful of any new relationship. I need to crossdress, there is something so deep in my psyche ever since I can remember. My soon-to-be ex satisfied me and alleviated that need until she chose to punish me sexually. I guess you could say my marriage sucked, except for my 8 year old who I live for. I'm trying to find time and energy to build a credible femme personality. Sometimes I fantasize being a woman with a man; but I don't think I could do it. Or maybe I don't think I could pull it off. But never, a man with another man.

[RachelPortugal]

Being bi-sexual, whether dressed or not I have no preferences as to gender of a partner. So far, when dressed, I have only been hit on by guys out for a bj or more, but if he's cute then what the hell.

My wife is OK with that, so long as I take precautions. She even encouraged me with a male friend who commented on my manhood, so she could watch. Voyeurism is her kick.

[trannie T]

I've only had sex with women. I am attracted to women. However I am curious about being with another man. The thoughts about a same sex encounter have become stronger as time has gone by. We'll see what happens.

[EveMarie]

I hear a lot of you speak of your wives and how kind and supportive they are. My wife and I of almost 10 years are splitting up; the divorce is almost final. She threatens me constantly about my crossdressing I guess you could say my marriage sucked, except for my 8 year old who I live for.

I can relate totally, My first (I was around 20something was in to playing and experimenting, (somewhat of an enabler) my second understood but didn't encourage or want to participate, and was the mother of my son (at the time of our divorce he was 8 also), my third, was not only an enabler but helped me buy sexy dresses, pants, bras, shoes, etc. but when push came to shove during our split up she denied having any interest in my CD at all. Now my current 4th and absolutely love of my life (12 years now) knows of my past, accepts it for what it was but doesn't know I still do it, and more now than ever.

I have found out that letting it all out at the beginning of a relationship is (for me) the best, especially if you plan on continuing.

:) xxx, Evie

[Kayla86]

I am not ruling it out, but so far I haven't met any men that I was sexually attracted to.

[Misty_cder]

Let me start by saying you ladies who are married for 20+ years are my role model. My wife and I have known each other for nearly 17 years, married for 8, and well on our way to reaching the 20 year and beyond mark. As for my sexuality, I consider myself bisexual. but I only recently came "out" about my orientation. During high school, I had several encounters with a friend. I never dressed in front of him, except once. I wore his mothers bathing suit in the hot tub for him. I looked back on this as just a phase and considered myself pure hetro.

When my wife and I were dating, we would talk for many hours about me dressing and the fantasy of being with a guy while dressed. While out on dates, we would look at guys and girls and discuss what we would look for, body wise, if we were to explore more. This talking continued for many years and recently, we were very close to having a three way with a fellow dresser. During the discussions with my wife about having a three way, I concluded I was Bi, and my wife is accepting of it. Now we can only hope to one day be given the opportunity again for that three way. :D

[Claire3]

Nope!

[marykrissmithcd]

I've thought about this at some length and come to the conclusion that if the person was right I might take the next step. By right person I mean another crossdresser. The other person would definately have to be fully dressed as a woman for me to be interested.