The urge to purge.

[Delila]

Lately I have been feeling a very powerful urge to quit CDing. I have come to good terms with my crossdressing years ago and I havent had the feeling of wanting to stop in years. Lately all of the old guilty feelings have been picking up and I am really confused as to where it came from. Has anyone here experienced any similar issues where the guilt has gone away for a very long time then returned without reason unexpectedly?

[crusadergirl]

I have come to accept my crossdressing. And still ever other week i want quit. But its not guilt. I really don't know what it is. I been wanting to sell all my stuff for no reason. I don't get why i like cding but i want quit every other week. It drives me crazy megan. But i know if i get rid of my stuff i will wish i didn't do it. Maybe i wasn't suppose to cd and something in my head is trying to tell me that.
Are i'm just crazy.

[Nadia-Maria]

The urge to quit CDing is not necessarily linked to guilt, I think.

Moreover, why should be feel any guilt for just crossdressing ?

As for the need to crossdress, it may be varying with some highs and some lows during a lifetime. It's wholly normal to have much or less (or even no need at all for any long period of time) need or pleasure to do it .

If you cease CDing, don't make the usual mistake to purge your clothes. You will be very happy to still have them, when you will CD again, even not before several years.

Many of us are partly man, partly woman. They want to live more manly or more womanly according to the circumstances of their life. Nothing noticeable at all.

Hugs

Nadia


I been wanting to sell all my stuff for no reason.

Maybe just to get the money !

Kisses

Nadia

[Delila]

I think maybe I misspoke with the word guilt. I am not sure what I am feeling right now it is stronger than the urge to just stop dressing for a while and give it a break I just associate with the feelings of guilt that my family made me feel when i was younger. This is just a feeling that i really havent had since my parents made me feel i was doing something wrong. I have had no reason to feel that lately.

[crusadergirl]

I know i'm not going to purge. Whatever keeps telling me to do this stuff goes away and i'm fine. But then it starts over again. I don't need money so it can't be about that.

[Sophia KT]

Hi,

I wouldn't purge if I were you. I can't say that the guilt has come back for me as you describe [it has gone away in my case] but I spent years not dressing up, and just feel like I wasted them now.

I found that no matter how much I distanced myself, and occupied myself in other ways, nothing took its place.

Hugs

Sophia XX


I know i'm not going to purge. Whatever keeps telling me to do this stuff goes away and i'm fine. But then it starts over again. I don't need money so it can't be about that.



I honestly think it is linked to dressing itself i.e. you put it on, you take it off.

If you see what I mean.

Sophia

[deja true]

If we've finally really come to accept our dressing and have no reason for guilt, then maybe what your feeling is sorta analagous to the "Pink Fog" that makes us want o dress feminine in the first place.

It's a "Blue Fog" that tells us that we're missing something about our male side.

Many feel that they are both male and female inside and often tell us that they are happy with both. Could be you feel bad about obsessing a little too much about megan lately and not giving "him" his chance to be him.

Just a thought!

Don't purge, though (unless it's just that hideous blouse you bought because it was on sale!).

Good luck with that, hon!

deja

[Sharon B.]

I would suggest you either pack it all away in a suit case or some type of box and wait and see if you can do without the crossdressing or not.
From my own experience I can say it hasn't stooped, I can remember some nice outfits I had but not anymore after purging once too many times.
Now I just pack them away in a suitcase knowing the urge will come back, whenever I feel I need to take a break.

[carolinebrookes]

I have a phase every now and again when I don't feel at all like dressing. I think I'm fairly normal in that. It happens to so many people in our situation.

Back in my formative years, I purged a couple of times and to this day regret it. Now, when that feeling comes on, I pack all my stuff into large boxes and keep it under the house till I feel I need it again.

I'm not sure it's any feeling of guilt that causes my downtimes. It is just something that happens and I acept happens from time to time. I no longer worry about it.

My advice is the same as some others. Pack it up and store it. The urge to dress always returns at some point.

[Emily Ann Brown]

Wake up girls !!!!! Think it through.


GGs don't like to dress up and run around in heels all the time. DUH HUH. Maybe what you are feeling is that same thing. You don't feel guilt, you just want a sweatshirt and a pair of shorts and lose all pressure to be "pretty". Be honest, it is a pain at times to spend an hour or more primping.

I have settled into a real female lifestyle and it's working. I only do makeup when going out. I am in stocking feet, and maybe a comfortable pair of flats unless I'm going out. My nightly outfit is usually a sundress or a cami and soft capris. My time is my own to read, clean, paint, whatever.


Emily Ann

["Mary"]

I would suggest you either pack it all away in a suit case or some type of box and wait and see if you can do without the crossdressing or not.
....


Wake up girls !!!!! Think it through. GGs don't like to dress up and run around in heels all the time. DUH HUH. Maybe what you are feeling is that same thing. ...

Good advice above. Pack it up and put it in the archives, then wait a few months/years and see if you still feel the same way.

[traceyanne]

i too go through phases of not dressing, im currently in one where i cant be bothered getting dressed, havent put a dress or skirt on in weeks but there is no way i will purge, wife would not let me even if i wanted. i dont know the reason why, but i have put a bit of weight on and some of my stuff doesnt look quite right when i have it on, maybe this is putting me off. will just stick with my frilly undies till the feeling comes back to me, which i know it will.

[Girdlewoman]

I'm in that spot now. I don't have any desire to be female at the moment. I have even let my body hair grow back after years and years of being clean shaven. I did purge a little. I took the opportunity to sort through my stuff and got rid of some stuff I know I won't use. I did pack the valuable stuff. I know I'll be back enfemme in full force soon enough I just don't know when. The one thing I have learned about this gender stuff is that we all seem to have several similar traits but they all very in some way. It's fun once one accepts this. Peace, Girdlewoman

[tamarav]

Megan,

If the feeling seems to keep lasting I have a solution for you. Pack everything up as others have said but don't store it, send it to me and I will store it for you. When, and we both know there will be a when, you get the urge once again, I will ship the boxes back to you, unopened and sealed.

My previous purges brought me up short on the reality side, I can't afford to dump all of my items, not even every ten years or so. Mentally it is worse than the physical loss of your femme belongings.

The offer is open, just ask.

Your sis,

Tami

[tamela bell]

the feeling comes and goes. when i get the urge to purge i just pack everything up and put it storage until it passes.then pull everything back out, and pick up where i left off.

[Angie G]

Many of us have I never felt any guilt about dressing and never thought of stopping and I'v been dressing almost 50 years hun. :hugs:
Angie

[StayceeCD]

I've never had the "urge to purge"... I've always enjoyed it. However when I was younger and did not realize there were others like me I thought I was maybe weird or a freak.. Which led to guilt and shame over what I was doing.. Back then it was only maybe a pair of pantyhose or a bra "borrowed" from sis or mom.. Even with the guilt I knew I would ALWAYS do it again.. I kept my "stash" .. Thank god I was never found out! I'm the oldest of 5 kids and the chances were against me! So don't purge! you WILL regret it! This is part of who you are.. It may lay dormant for a while but it WILL always come back.. Good Luck!
Staycee

[matrioshka]

Don't do it. I did it last year like a fool. Just in dollars and cents terms, this stuff is expensive. You will regret it, and start rebuilding what was lost. Better to put it away and forget about it for a while.

In my case, I was lucky: Some of my stuff ended up on Ebay, and I managed to buy the better items back.

M

[docrobbysherry]

Purging makes little sense. You're just treating the symptoms, not the disease!

When I started dressing, I thot I was TG/TS. But I guess I'm not.

Rite now, I don't want to quit CDing, but someday, I expect I will. I'm worried if I DID want to quit, I couldn't.

I have plenty of CD guilt. But it's not classic guilt. It's because I'm neglecting so many other aspects of my life to dress.

[Karren H]

Wake up girls !!!!! Think it through.

GGs don't like to dress up and run around in heels all the time. DUH HUH. Maybe what you are feeling is that same thing. You don't feel guilt, you just want a sweatshirt and a pair of shorts and lose all pressure to be "pretty". Be honest, it is a pain at times to spend an hour or more primping.

I have settled into a real female lifestyle and it's working. I only do makeup when going out. I am in stocking feet, and maybe a comfortable pair of flats unless I'm going out. My nightly outfit is usually a sundress or a cami and soft capris. My time is my own to read, clean, paint, whatever.

Emily Ann

Yeah..... What she said..... Plus, including myself, most everyone that has ever purged finds out that it was a mistake..... So set your things aside and see what happens...

or sent them to Emily Ann... Em, horizontal stripes??? :D

[rachel_rachel]

I've purged before... hated every minute of it too, the first time i did it i went and got it all back plus some, the next time i made sure it went. Then the urge came back even stronger.
So here i am now, i have more women's clothes than men's, more high heels than a shoe store, more underwear than i know what to do with.. and i told my wife i was going to get rid of it all cos i was feeling depressed about a seperateissue she said no you're not if you must get rid of it you sell it. Do not give it away.

[Deborah Jane]

I did a partial purge last night, mainly things i haven,t worn in ages and i don,t like anymore. I just cut it all up!!
I was going to carry on this morning, but looking at the clothes lying there on my bed, i know i,ll end up regretting it:sad:
I guess deep down we know this is with us for life and it doesn,t matter how much we try to lose it, it always comes back again!!

I,ve reached a point in my life where for the first time i think i,ve actually accepted who i am and anything i do from now on to stop or deny it is pointless.

Of course i,m a crossdresser, i even came on this forum in the middle of an attack of "self denial"!!!
How stupid is that?:brolleyes:

[Carly D.]

Lately I have been feeling a very powerful urge to quit CDing. I have come to good terms with my crossdressing years ago and I havent had the feeling of wanting to stop in years. Lately all of the old guilty feelings have been picking up and I am really confused as to where it came from. Has anyone here experienced any similar issues where the guilt has gone away for a very long time then returned without reason unexpectedly?

This feeling hit me this past Monday and it's the first time I have had these feelings since I threw everything away when I was in high school... and I'm not sure where this feeling came from.. I was doing something and the idea just hit me out of the blue to just load everything into a trash bag and throw it all away.. I know it would be a big giant mistake to do, but the idea hit... usually when this feeling hits me it is right after the first of the year as it was this year.. the best way to fight this feeling is to either put my clothes away somewhere, or to toss some of them... I wanted to do this with some of my old tights/pantyhose but there's just one problem.. I can still wear them, and I am one of those who if I could see "raiding" some womans closet and taking these tights and making them my own then why should I throw them away... I want less clothing but am settling on just having what I have and not buying any more.. for now...

[Emily Anderson]

Great advice from Sharon! Pack it all up and store it away somewhere where it is out of sight and out of mind. This "want to give it all up" feeling happens to me every once in a while, but the urge always comes back eventually, at least so far.

When I did purge (luckily only once), I felt really bad about having got rid of a load of things that I really liked, which was actually worse than the feeling I'd had about wanting to give it up!

[Janice1948]

I purged several times over the years and have wished so many times that I had never done that. I think it is rare that a CD gives up dressing and never comes back to it. I am in my 60's and have been dressing since I was 12. Fortunately I am at a stage now such that I can dress whenever I want to and believe me that is quite frequent (panties 24/7 of course). I agree with all the girls that recommend that you pack the stuff away in your attic. I think the day will come when you will be glad you did.

Hugs, Janice

[Danielle1960]

I wonder why we purge too. However there are benefits in that we get to go and find new stuff when we decided we might have over reacted.
Seriously though I think we are practical folks as well and we find some serious frustrations with the stigma we have to deal with.
I'm on a purge right now and it has lasted quite awhile. I decided instead of trying to look femme as I feel to dress my birth gender, so I'm cross dressing all the time. Confused? LOL me too.:heehee: Actually follow your heart the good thing about clothing is they put out new and nicer stuff every day!!
Cheers
Danielle

[Celeste]

I can't consider this again as it accomplishes absolutely nothing whether you are in agreement with it at the time or not. It's like a quick patch job to a severely flawed dam.I have a special closet and a special key to open it,this way no purging is necessary.I'll just lock it and take a break until I'm ready again.

[Stormgirl]

The urges will never go away, oh and happy birthday :hugs:

[dancer1]

Purging is bad when money is harder to come buy, cause sooner or later your going to miss the thing that for that moment brouht something to your life and you will buy it twice . Quick referance the other night at a card game a player has enough land for horses but he said to rich of a hobby for him, i stated owning horses is a way of life & buy no means a hobby , the same with CD its a way of life not every day for some . so the point is put it in a box and if you ever need them just open . best wishes Nadeen

[CD Susan]

I have purged three times over the years and regreted it each time. Each time I did it I was convinced I did not need to dress and if the clothes were not there to tempt me I could kick the habit. I was wrong each time and when the urge returned after a few months I would end up buying more things than I had before. My last purge was about ten years ago so I have more things now than I ever did in the past. I have learned from this and will never do it again. I read somewhere once that the older we get the urge to dress declines. This is not happening with me, the urge is as strong now as it was when I started.

[Amy Hepker]

You may purge, but down the road you will kick yourself in the butt for giving up all that wonderful stuff. If you feel the need to walk away for a while do so, but don't get rid of eveything, put it in a storage unit for a while away from you, then when you get the urge again it will be there and you won't have to get rid of the things you really like. Unless you have the money to replace everything again. Shopping is fun, being without your treasures is not.

[Carly D.]

I've never had the "urge to purge"... I've always enjoyed it. However when I was younger and did not realize there were others like me I thought I was maybe weird or a freak.. Which led to guilt and shame over what I was doing.. Back then it was only maybe a pair of pantyhose or a bra "borrowed" from sis or mom.. Even with the guilt I knew I would ALWAYS do it again.. I kept my "stash" .. Thank god I was never found out! I'm the oldest of 5 kids and the chances were against me! So don't purge! you WILL regret it! This is part of who you are.. It may lay dormant for a while but it WILL always come back.. Good Luck!
Staycee

I agree 100%... if you have to "purge", do a controlled purge, just something you haven't worn in forever...