Crossdressers Answer Only Pls.

[Vicky_Scot]

A GG can speak about having a CD husband or partner but from a Crossdressers point of view can a GG really have any real understanding of how we feel or how we view things?

[Jill]

Can anyone really have a true understanding of how others feel especially when there is a difference in gender?

[satin_luva]

To the full extent, absolutely not. Our crossdressing is our secret (or not so secret) little passion and escape from our stressful lives. Most people would say "how the f#*@ can certain clothing and makeup make you feel all better?"

Some women can understand very well. Because a lot of women crave for lingerie and couture gowns and makeup they have a fairly good idea how it feels for us to wear what they wear. But we are men and we have clothing specifically designed for us and are (by the majority) socially expected to wear them.

I used to be a skateboarder about four or so years ago. When I was skating I looked at the people around me that didn't have skateboard and thought "how can you live life without skateboarding?" Because I was so obsessed with it I thought it was one of the very few important things on this planet. Now that the dream has almost completely gone I have seen the light and can see how people can live without skateboarding. People around us can ever so easily see how UNimportant CDing is and don't completely understand how it feels to us.

[jaina]

Very few can.
Some can with lots of time spent with a very good gender counseler that is also very good at teaching.
Most will never get it.

Geographic area and culture has a lot to do with it.

[CharleneT]

No more than we can understand what it is like to be a GG. Still, some folks are very understanding and learn about their spouses/SO's etc feelings and thoughts.

[Emily Ann Brown]

I'll answer YES.

I think some have a clue because of things they have experienced that are somewhat similar in general concept. Of course since we are all unique we are all a bit different.


Emily Ann

[Annaliese]

Can a GG have a understanding yes, Can they turley understand no, I do not truley understand my self. Other than this is who I am.

Anna

[Nicki B]

It depends how good you are at explaining, dunnit? :strugglin



PS - I think it's a shame the GGs haven't been invited to express an opinion?

[kristiCD]

My experience is that most GG are completely turned off by it

[Pandora]

I would think no since it is such a unique situation. However, I often think of all the different situations that others different than myself go through (being GG or a different race or gay or paralyzed or whatever) and try to be as empathetic as possible. Will I ever really know what it's like to be those things? no, but it shouldn't get in the way of trying to understand and being accepting. This is something I've noticed myself doing alot more of the as the years have passed and I've met more and more people different than myself.

Hi Emily. I noticed you said yes because of things similar in concept. Care to elaborate? My brain is locked up right now and I can't think of any. (probably because I'm trying to be a skinny bitch too! I need food. love the blonde btw) :hugs:

[sissystephanie]

I believe it would depend on the GG! I have been blessed with two GG's so far in my long life that did understand as far as possible. One was my dear late wife and the other is my GGF in Scotland. However, I also agree with Jill. Can anyone, male or female, truly understand the full thinking of another? I think not. That is how Psychiatrists or Psychologists make their money!

Sissy/Stephanie

Girl on the ouside, but man underneath!

[ChristineRenee]

I think that they can have an understanding of it to a point, but unless you are CD/TG/TS like we are I just don't think that one can fully comprehend totally what it is like to be one of us. Just my opinion on that.

[kym]

ya know, sometimes I don't quite understand myself, so can others understand me or my feelings and desires? now, if I found a GG that could even begin to understand me, it might be a little different response.

[Sinthia]

Can anyone really have a true understanding of how others feel especially when there is a difference in gender?

Everyone is different, and I do not believe anyone can have a true understanding of how others feel about something, regardless of gender.

[TGMarla]

No more than we can understand what it is like to be a GG.
:yt:

Just as many true women on this forum have said that there is no way that we as men can truly feel what it is like to be a woman, I think that there is no way that a GG can truly know what is is like for us, unless she is also transgendered. Even in such a case, it is doubtful. Empathy is one thing, but true understanding is another. I admit that I have a difficult time understanding just what our FTM members feel, as I cannot empathize with their overwhelming desire to be male, or emulate men. I understand being transgendered, because I am. But I don't get with their desire to "be" male. I'm sure it's similar, only in reverse.

But I know what it is like to have feminine feelings and desires, as a consequence of my transgendered nature. That, however, is not "feeling like a woman". That is fantasizing that I'm a woman, and harvesting the feelings that go along with it. Does that make any sense?

[Shadeauxmarie]

The largest part I don't believe most GGs would understand is the compulsion. The drive to dress is ALWAYS there. Suppressed sometimes for years, but it NEVER completely vanishes.

[Joy Carter]

Too many variables in the reasons why all of us dress. How is a GG to really know ? Even if your up front with them, can they really understand ? :2c:

[Angie G]

Some of us don't have an understanding of it. Why would they. :hugs:
Angie

[Rachel Morley]

Depends on the GG ... but IMHO what almost all GGs have, is an abundance of empathy. That does a lot to go towards understanding almost anything. :)

[deja true]

A GG can speak about having a CD husband or partner but from a Crossdressers point of view can a GG really have any real understanding of how we feel or how we view things?



A CD can speak about having an understanding DH or SO but from a GGs point of view can a CD really have any real understanding of how they feel or how they view things?

How does that sound?

In both cases, the answer is, of course not. No one person regardless of gender, will ever have a real understanding of how anyone else feels or views things.. (except maybe identical siamese twins who share the same nervous system).

But some people, especially many here (but obviously not all), are able to empathize to a remarkable degree with others, no matter the gender. And that's more than enough. Who wants a clone for a partner?

Your question is worded in a way that only one sensible answer can be given, a way that agrees with your implied opinion. "... really have any real understanding...". And I sense that your opinion is no, but not in an unbiased curious way.

In fact, it occurs to me that you want GGs to read this or it would have been posted in a private forum like the GM forum.

Whatever your opinion and whatever your motive for asking this question this way, you have my answer. But somehow, it doesn't feel right...

I'll not post in this thread again. I'm not up for a war of words...

[Ibuki_Warpetal]

Can anyone really have a true understanding of how others feel especially when there is a difference in gender?
^This.



--

Depends on the indivudual, doesn't it?

[Veronica 1]

Each and every person have their own life experiences that taint their understanding of others. Everyone has their own failures, successes, wants, and desires that will influence their thoughts and perceptions. As stated earlier, this is why psychiatrists get rich, and they probably do not really understand but base their opinions on ingrained training and previous experiences. So, in essence, no GG can really understand a CD any better than most of us CD's can understand ourselves.

[Jada Rose]

I have trouble understanding myself sometimes. That being said, a GG may not understand, but can be understanding. We're all individuals with unique thoughts and feelings. :)

[KatherinePaige]

A GG can speak about having a CD husband or partner but from a Crossdressers point of view can a GG really have any real understanding of how we feel or how we view things?

Can we really feel what it is like to be pregnant for 9 months and give birth?
No, so to answer your question I would say they can sympathize with us try to see it from our point of view but can they really grasp what it feels like to finally be yourself?

IMO about as much as we can be pregnant for 9 months and give birth.:2c:

[docrobbysherry]

I have trouble understanding myself sometimes. That being said, a GG may not understand, but can be understanding. We're all individuals with unique thoughts and feelings. :)

I don't think u should exclude ANYONE in your question.
The reason I haven't told anyone about my CDIng, is I don't think ANYONE; male, female, dog, cat or alien would understand it!

Even many CDs here don't get my CDing. And to be honest, I often don't get the CDing others do.

My hope would be for a future GG SO, to be UNDERSTANDING when I dress up like her!

[Sugar]

or Sherry if you prefer.

It's a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world...

I agree with you wholeheartedly. My family has known about me since I was a child and don't understand. Shoot, I still don't understand. All I know is that it is me...who I am.

There have been people in my life that had a clue about the feminine me and they were cool with it and there have been the ones that just had to confront me in the most negative way.

Just now as I sit here reflecting...I don't think my life has been so bad. I've learned to play the hand I've dealt.

Rambling on...and I was just going to read tonight.

Sorry,

sugar







I don't think u should exclude ANYONE in your question.
The reason I haven't told anyone about my CDIng, is I don't think ANYONE; male, female, dog, cat or alien would understand it!

Even many CDs here don't get my CDing. And to be honest, I often don't get the CDing others do.

My hope would be for a future GG SO, to be UNDERSTANDING when I dress up like her!

[Joanne f]

No i don`t think so as they are FAB so they would not need to understand as it is a part of them , unless you are going throu or have been throu the same things i think that it would be impossible to truly understand how someone else feels (unless you are a Vulcan :heehee:) but that should not stop anyone trying to understand how someone else feels.


joanne

[melissacd]

Perhaps the best any of us can do is listen with an open heart and mind and care enough to do our very best to understand and respect each other. We are unique and very complex individuals and there is no way that anyone can really, truly, 100% understand another person's reality. We can, however, accept and respect that it is their truth, as valid to them as ours is to us.

So then the question becomes...do we have to really truly understand so long as we try to understand as best as is reasonably possible for a human being? that becomes the foundation of a good, loving, caring relationship.

[dominique]

No, I don't. The reason for this is they are not going through the emotional highs and lows that we go through. No doubt they see this and ask us what's wrong many will say nothing because the fear of being found out is too great. If told the reasons why we crossdress they react either by going off the deep end at the time we need their greatest support, or they give us the support and love we need to progress. But on the whole they cann't understand what we are going through.

[Carol Richards]

In my case, I told my wife a few weeks after we first met that I liked to wear womens clothes. Being a closeted cd it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. At first, she didn't really understand, but she also didn't think it was all that bad. She didn't want to see me dressed at first, but after awhile she wanted to see me dressed(scared to death), but it went ok. Since then she has helped me with clothes, makeup, etc. She realized that I was just a man(all man) that liked to wear the clothes that she wore, just as women like to wear mens clothes, and for the first time I could feel comfortable about myself. A fact that took me so many years (and this website) to learn about me and that I was not the only one.

It's just too bad that society can't be as tolerant about men wearing womens clothes as they are about women wearing mens clothes, but there are gg that can understand, just as gg like wearing mens clothes. We like to wear the clothes because they are comfortable and they make us feel good about ourselves. I think that people that know you and are open minded are more likley to see through the clothes just as we see through women wearing mens clothes. I thank god every day that he has blessed me with such a great wife. Sorry to be so long winded with my response.

[noname]

Can anyone really have a true understanding of how others feel especially when there is a difference in gender?

Sure.

GG's can understand. It's like this. Ask them to cut their short with a nice buzz cut. Have them wear crappy mens pants. Then ask how they would feel if their failure to comply would mean a job loss. Possible divorce and lose of friends.

I take it back, women can not understand the suffering and oppression that is put upon men.

Tisk tisk, isn't it sad. It doesn't matter if you clothes and hair isn't you. Society says, it WILL be how you dress or face the consequences.

[Eugenie]

can a GG really have any real understanding of how we feel or how we view things?

I think the answer is "No more than we can really feel what a GG really feels." Actually it even more complex, we can never feel exactly what someone else feels.

Howver, we can have more or less empathy with what other people feel. In that respect, both sides of the "picture" can have mutual empathy.

I think that it is often one of our problems to attribute the lack of understanding to our wives/SOs...

:hugs:
Eugenie

[Bethany_Anne_Fae]

A GG can speak about having a CD husband or partner but from a Crossdressers point of view can a GG really have any real understanding of how we feel or how we view things?


Yes, they can (some of them anyways). I know this because I married one ;)

Zara

[Krista M]

i dont see how anyone can truely understand what we dont understand about not understanding
how a GG can understand how we feel about understanding ourselves
hell i dont even understand why i want to dress but the compulsion drives me nuts and i dont understand why i have the compulsion to dress.........wait asecond 1....2.....3.....4
well i am lost now well anyway i dont understand

[ChanDelle]

All good answers, but I do think that a few GGs here approach understanding us. I'd like to see what some of them have to say about this and what makes them think so. I know understanding and acceptance are different, but doesn't there have to be some shared reality level for true acceptance (not just tolerance) to occur?

ChanDelle

[Ibuki_Warpetal]

One would hope two people who have committed to a stable relationship are sharing their realities.

[Farrah]

The question is, do we understand. I'm almost 30 and i've been cding for most of those years and i still don't understand. If any one understand, please tell me.

[Beth-Lock]

Doubt it, but then I do not understand it myself. Maybe tolerance and sympathy are the relevant traits to be desired in others and ourselves.

[az_azeel]

To quote a famous Scot... Mr Robert Burns
"the greatest gift that god could give us
to see ourselves as others see us" (translated slightly)

[occdresser]

Simple-no:mooning:

[victoriamwilliams1]

In the case of my unknowing GG the answer is no. She made this reply several times over the years when the topic came up on television or in public when we have seen a CD.