The Merry go Round doesn't want to stop

[Nikki A.]

The past 8 months have been a blur and an eye opener for me. Since my wife passed away I've had the pleasure of really bonding with my 2 kids. Helping the oldest pick his college and now teaching the younger one how to drive. At work, I've been "promoted", more hours, more aggravation for not much more money.
With all this I've also come more to terms with my cding. With my wife there was no way she would let me go out(except on Halloween). I've only been out once dressed so far but I hope that by the end of the month I'll have two more trips out. One is this weekend at Rainbow Mountain and at the end of the month a commitment ceremony. I've come out to a co-worker (she and her husband invited me to the com. ceremony). I've gone into stores and said that I was shopping for me, after all the shoes need to match the dress. Even went to Maidenform and was measured and tried on bras.
In all that has gone on the world has not fallen apart and I'm still standing, just a little bloody. No way would I have attempted some of these things without the support and your reading of your experiences. I really do think that the biggest obstacle to our being who we are is our own fears. Even here in redneck Pa I have received positive support from those that I have so far told.

[Shelly Preston]

I am glad to hear the positive experinces have helped you in some small way

:)

[Angie G]

You go girl.:hugs:
Angie

[TGMarla]

These are good things to hear. I'm happy that you have had such positive progress in the face of your terrible loss.

[Seville]

I'm saddened at the loss of your wife, unaccepting or not.

Glad to hear about your positive experiences.

[Paula Rae]

Searching,

I know what you are going through, having lost my wife of 22 years and being left with a 12 year old son to care for.

The most important thing in your life is your kids. You didn't mention their ages but what ever you do keep them in mind and do what is best for them, even if it means not dressing for a while or even a very long while.

God bless you and your children.

Paula Rae

[Maddie]

searching hope to meet you at rainbow

hugs
maddie

[Amy Hepker]

It is fears that hold us back, that is so true.

[Nikki A.]

Again thanks for the condolences, we had a good relationship, while she didn't approve she knew that it was apart of me and tried to let me do my thing. My son is 18 and daughter is 16. She and I went shopping last weekend and she needed to replace some of her bras. I let her shop while I got a soda. In the car all she could do was complain how hard it was to get a good fitting bra. If only she knew how I can relate to that. Then I tried to explain to her that as band size goes down cup size needs to to go up (her mom told me LOL).
Anyway Maddie hope to meet you and hopefully some of the other wonderful and caring members of this forum this weekend.

[JoAnnDallas]

Sorry to hear about your wife passing. I know what you mean. Recently my wife deciede to accept my CDing and I am still trying to catch up. LOL I still have a nagging fear that she will all of a sudden do a 180 degree turn on my CDing, so I have been letting her take the lead and only very gently pushing some issues. So far everything is work out fine. The other day, she aske me to let her know in advance when I like to get dressed and go out, so that she could see if there would be any conflits with our schedule. Like for the past week and the next two weeks, our son will be in town working at a new CVS store. He comes over for dinner, stays a while and spend the weekend at our house so that he does not have to drive all the way back to Houston on Fridya and then back here to Dallas on Sunday. So we agreed not only not to tell our son that I am a CD, but I would not go out anywhere until the store opens and he leaves on the 24th. After he leaves in the evening and goes back to the hotel for the night, I then change into my satin PJ,s for the rest of the evening.
CDing can be a juggling match when you have others in the house that are unaware of it all.

[sissystephanie]

My condolences on your loss. I lost my wife of 49+ years 3 years ago, and it is still hard. Part of that is because I had told her about my CD activities before we were married, and she was fully supportive. In fact, she took over the job of doing my makeup and wig so we could go out as two girls.

I have two grown children, and only recently told my daughter. My wife and I had decided that we would keep that part of lives a secret. I still haven't told my son, and may not because of his wife.

Hope your life is good, and that you keep in touch on the Forum.

Sissy/Stephanie

Girl on the outside. but man underneath!

[SherriePall]

My belated condolences on your wife's passing.
The thing about rednecks is that most aren't suspecting CD's in their daily journies. As far as shopping, if you are pleasant and patient, most SA's are very helpful in selecting that special outfit or that pair of shoes. Some of them actually love to help and, sometimes I believe, have more fun doing so than we are trying those outfits and shoes on.
You'll have to let us know how attending the ceremony goes.

[Nikki A.]

I just found out the wedding isn't until the middle of June not May 31. Apparently my friend doesn't read well. It does make it easier to get the day clear. Now I hope it isn't too hot since most of it is outdoors.
I also asked her if her husband's parents would have a problem ( As much as I am really looking forward to it, I don't want to create any problems). Well, she asked her mom-in law and all she said that you obviously don't know the family. I'm invited to their house before and if I want I can change there also if I want. Ya see, if you don't ask you never know. Only relative who may be a problem in an uncle in the military, but then again it's a lesbian ceremony, other gays, other CDs and TGs. If he shows up(not really cool about his sister's lifestyle) he'll have lots more to keep him occupied.