what happens when we die

[adelle]

hi girlz hope you had a fun and wonderfull day. have you ever given this a thought?
if you are still in the closet and you have all you precious female goodies hidden all over the home and in the garage, what happens to it when you die and what about the person comming across your goodies?
keep safe
:hugs:

[Emily Anderson]

FYI I asked the same question in this thread:

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=81658

[Kate Simmons]

Hopefully it would be put to good use.:)

[Bart]

my feeling is that i'm gone so it wont really bother me and who ever finds your prized collection can explain it by saying " i never new ".

i wonder though as my last wish should i make them dress me enfem?

[KarenCDFL]

Honestly I have thought about it but my wife is more worried about having to clean all of my crap out of the garage LOL :)

[Tomara]

Hi Adelle , In response to your question I used to be afraid of what would someone think when they found all my femine apparel, I have also though about writing a note to explain this part of my life to the ones who will handle my estate. I have not done this yet and I dont really worry about what they will think of me when I am gone. I hope this helps you in some way. Tomara

[Sophia KT]

I went out in the car the other night and ended up more scared of crashing and surviving only to be found to be crossdressed, than of losing my life.

This public prejudice thing has got out of hand.

[SherriePall]

Since my wife knows about me, I figure she can keep what she likes and fits and the rest she can give to charity. When she finds my pics, well, that's a whole 'nother story. LOL

[danielle_from_cal]

I imagine my "stuff" would be found eventually. But I would be dead, so why would I care? My wife might think, "That explains a lot". Then she might ask my Mom or one of my sisters and they might say, "Yeah, he was dressing like a girl since he was 14". Overall, it would be no big deal. I would not worry about it on my deathbed.

[trannie T]

One of the reasons I told my brother about my crossdresssing was for this very reason. I really don't care who knows about me now and when I'm deead it will make no difference whatsoever.

[Roberta Llyan]

I feel as some of the others and, not to be rude to you, but WHO CARES! I'm dead so I don't give a S---!



Let my two sons fight over my femme clothes. Maybe they will advance in their thinking and get off their holier than me kick!

[linnea]

I've given this a lot of thought. Of course, as the one who has died, it won't matter to me. However, I do care about those I will leave behind. They may say such things as "That explains a lot" or "we never knew," but I think that they will have to deal with some disillusionment about the deceit--not so much the crossdressing itself. That's what concerns me.
So I have worked on this and rehearsed telling my daughter (grown, married, very understanding and open-minded), but I have not had the courage to follow through. I have a very good relationship with my daughter and my other [grown] children. I don't want to risk disrupting or damaging that relationship, so I am taking the easier route by avoiding the issue.
I have also thought about telling my lawyer or my family physician. I may do this, perhaps telling both. I've got to write and register a will. When I do that, I may tell my lawyer and ask his advice. When I go in for my next check-up, I may tell my doctor and ask for her advice too.
For me, it's not easy to say, "I'll be dead, so what do I care." Yet I haven't found the nerve (or the affrontery) to tell anyone closely related to me.

[docrobbysherry]

Which ever place I end up, I'm pretty sure I'll NEED all my gear!

[Cassy11]

I'm not worried about it. My wife and both grown children know. My wife keeps asking me what I want to be buried in (from the waist down of course), in particular the shoes.

[Randy]

My wife knows, so at this point, I'm confident that she will get rid of everything - maybe by burning them.

[Paula G]

When it is my time to go I know that my wife will keep what she likes & get rid of the rest. I haven't figured out what I would do yet if I outlived her, though.

[CharleneT]

search around here a bit and you'll find a thread in the recent past about this. If I remember correctly the writer had the text of the letter that she puts with all of her clothing etc. It explains why you've found what you've found. I remember the text as being very kind and thoughtful, worth searching to find it.

I am going to write such a letter and put it with my stuff. It seems like "my stuff" is getting to be a large pile, will have to leave several letters !!

I believe that a good letter is a great idea. Still, once you are gone, all they can really do is wonder about it all ( assuming that you were completely in the closet).



C.

[bimini1]

I have this feeling that it would somehow "tarnish" my legacy as a man. Even though I would be gone if the wrong folks found it it would somehow ruin my fairly decent reputation.

[ConnieLove]

My wife allready knows,but i wouldn't want my son to find them.I don't know if he would think any less of me,that his dad was queer,or somthing.I hope my wife would explain to him

[Rachel Morley]

When I was single, living in the UK, and I was living on my own, I used to worry about this because I knew my parents would be the ones to discover "my secret" if I were to come to an untimely ending.

However, I now live in America and have an accepting wife, if I do meet my demise prematurely (i.e. my parents out-live their child) then I'm sure my darling will spare my parents any embarrassment!

In my world, I don't think it adds any value to my parent's lives to tell them considering I live 5500 miles away from them. :D

[Staci K]

My wife is in on my CD'ing. Since we're the same size and already share clothes, I know my outfits that she's always borrowing will become her's and vise versa should anything happen to her.

Nicole :heehee:

[Angela-Russell]

My wife will have a lovely time selling all my goodies on Ebay. Might make her rich too coz there's an awful lot of it ha ha

[Alex-is]

Ive thought about this, and its kinda worried me. Not like Ill have anything to worry about, but Id like to have my final message to my parents not be "I wear Dresses!"

Ive thought about the note, but i think id just leave them, give them something to pnder

[LilSissyStevie]

I would just love to be there when they start digging through my stuff. :eek::confused2::rofl:

[matrioshka]

Stevie,

I'm with you. I'd love to be there and see their reactions. I'll be dead then, and what they will say won't matter (not that it does now).

M

[elizabeth66]

Hi the COSMOS AWAITS ME_US

He OR She ?????????dust to dust . life and more life??????

[Edwina]

My wife knows and she has already seen me (by accident) in bra and half slip so it is of no consequence. She might be surprised though at the extent to which I have gone.
Anyway I know she will pass everything on to someone who can get the most out of everything.

Edwina

[Amy Hepker]

A HUGE Garage sale with big profits.

[Ruth]

Somebody way back in this thread worried that the discovery of femme clothes would tarnish his/her reputation.
Get real. Your reputation only matters if it's the truth.
My wife knows all about Ruth and if I go first she will probably dispose of things quietly, but that's just her sensibilities. If I go second, Ruth will come to light but that's OK, she's real and should not be denied.
If I have any account to worry about, it's before God, not society. And my conscience is clear.

[Myst]

This has been on my mind a lot lately - especially since my closet has grown exponentially in the last couple of years!

I often wonder who will it be that will find my things, but no matter who it is, I know they would be shocked! The only person that any knowledge of my other side is my girlfriend, but then again, she has no idea about just how much more I'm into it now.

Sometimes, I think I should just get rid of it all and not worry - but yet I can't. It is becoming more and more a part of me. In the end though, I suppose they will just say that they never knew and that they had no idea.

But who knows? Myabe by then, I'll be totally out and it won't be a surprise to anybody!

[monalisa]

Maybe we need to form a secret society of crossdressers who will immediately come by after your death and clean out your closets before anyone finds out the truth. They can then split the clothing with the members of the CD Lodge. Or set your clothes in a self destruct container whereby everything is incinerated if you fail to enter the daily code numbers. Just like mission impossible.

[Mitch23]

an interesting question. most of my girlie gear is stored at a friends house and she is not in the best of health. So if she goes first, I would have some explaining to do. I also have my car boot full, so a car smash or a break in might be interesting. My wife knows so I dont care to that extent

Mitch

[Joanne f]

when i die you will hear one almighty "Hooray" hes gone :heehee:



joanne :devil:

[Kelsy]

I imagine my wife will keep them around just to remind her of me!! and becos we wear many of the same sizes she could wear them!:daydreaming:

Kelsy

[debbeelee1]

I'm taking my stuff with me! No, seriously, my SO would probably just give it to Charity and throw out the unusual stuff!

[Emily Anderson]

The funny thing about this thread, and the one I posted earlier is that we rarely see the perspective of those who are truly secretive about their crossdressing (i.e. Nobody else knows, at least not the SO, family etc.)

The question was posed to gain an understanding of how these people feel about the potential discovery (by their loved ones) of their crossdressing activity, and how they intend to mitigate that situation.

Perhaps even more strange was that some responses said (paraphrased) "Who cares, I'll be dead!".

Oh well...

[Raychel]

Well I would guess that when I am gone that my wife will have some cleaning to do. And when she is done she will have ALOT more closet space. :heehee:

[Donna Michelle]

My wife knows another crossdresser that wears my size. She also knows I would like to be dressed as a woman for my funeral. She said I would probably wear my pink top and black leather skirt. We haven't decided yet.

Yeah, my wife would like to have more closet space.

[CD Susan]

This is a subject that I have thought about my entire life. I have never read about this before anywhere else but since becoming a member here it makes sense that this subject would come up. I am not married so my only heir is my son. When I do pass on he will be the one to discover the truth about his dad. I have often thought should I leave a "letter of explanation" with my stuff or just let it be discovered as is. Sure I will be dead so it will not matter to me but should I have the foresight to consider my sons feelings at this difficult moment in his life? I have thought that it would be convienient to get rid of everything that would be of questionable nature prior to my passing but that is not practicable. So what should I do? I could tell him about myself before I pass so there would be no surprizes and that seems like the most practicle thing to do but that is not easy to do either. This is indeed a most difficult issue to address so if anyone can offer any insight into this I would appreciate it very much.