Reasons to show your face in pics! [Archive] - Crossdressers.com - #1 Community & Forum for Crossdressers, Family and Friends

Ayame

05-23-2008, 12:38 AM

1) It is more comfortable to talk to someone who is willing to show their face.

2) If a family member, coworker, s/o seen your pic on here that would mean they themselves go on this site!

3) I understand showing your face takes a lot of courage however each person that shows their face makes it slightly easier for the next person to show theirs.

If you have any other reasons feel free to post them.

:happy:

This is not a post to bash on people that don't show their faces just a few reasons why they should. Me myself I didn't show my face till recently but thanks to my SO and this site I've gained a lot of confidence, support and a few friends.

harmony

05-23-2008, 12:49 AM

own up to who and what you are and proclaim it to the world=its the first step to self acceptance with inner peace and harmony to follow.

Rita cd12fr

05-23-2008, 02:26 AM

And a good reason not to (yet):

I don't want to look ridiculous. I have a wig on order but I have absolutely no make-up, so at the moment the very best I could do would be to paste an extremely drab male face.

That, in itself, is not ridiculous (I hope) but it is when set atop any female outfit.

Good for you if you started work from the head down but my work in progress started at the other end.

Maybe my next step, depending what the wig actually looks like will be a full length pic but with blanked-out face.

How long then until the full face? I don't know but my experiments with TAAZ suggest that it's likely to be quite a while - my best effort so far looks marginally more feminine than Bela Lugosi in his screen make-up. :-((

Wendy me

05-23-2008, 02:52 AM

it's up to the person .... and their level of comfort a picture here on-line is a huge step for a lot of us ..... lol i was real new to computers when i joined here ....... looking and reading threads .... i remember my first post on the forum i was shaking i was so nervous ....frist picture scared the hell out of me to post.....

i say to each their own ... but their is something to be said abought our steps and comfort level we go through.....try a picture feel the rush............

annabellesmooth

05-23-2008, 02:53 AM

being a tecno dinosaw, im flat out using this computa ,but im going to lerned how...
n try not to crack the lense, ha ha ha
i also agree that if some one see me, us.. on this site well...
WHO.... has the problem,.. not i !!!:battingeyelashes:
:love:
hugs n best wishess

Amy Hepker

05-23-2008, 03:02 AM

Because I like to see how you feel when you CD. Are you happy about CDing and feel good about yourself, you will have a SMILE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kate Simmons

05-23-2008, 03:13 AM

Mostly to show there is a person behind the words. With me, pretty much what you see is what you get (and then some). Those I have met from the Forum can verify it's the real me and all of my pics are "raw toonage" and never altered. Just me being me.:)

kay_jessica

05-23-2008, 03:32 AM

own up to who and what you are and proclaim it to the world=its the first step to self acceptance with inner peace and harmony to follow.

Absolutely, assuming off course that the picture posted is one of the poster and not of a fantasy wannabe. At least if one posts a pic a face other than your own at least make it the same age. I PMSL every time i see an avitar pic of a 20 yr old beauty only to read that the poster is actually 50+. I'm afraid any credibility of that poster posting outdoor adventures just goes out the window.

Be honest be true, I respect those that don't because they are still "getting" there and they should take as much time as they need.

Kay

anna72

05-23-2008, 04:06 AM

I will put up some pics of me once I get the time to take a nice set of photos and get my make, clothes and wig right.

Can be tough to get the time and place to do it properly.

Anna xxx

gagirl1

05-23-2008, 04:53 AM

i'm not pretty enough to post my face. gotta figure out the makeup and all that jazz.

Jenna Stunned

05-23-2008, 05:19 AM

I will post as soon as i have something worthy of posting. Right now i have a shaved head, no wig, and a goatee. And my girlfriend doesnt like it when i shave my face. So i supose i could post a pic like that but, I think it would be abit silly.

Im going to be buying a wig as soon as i have some disposable income. And told my girlfriend that i wanted to go all out when i do get one. So i guess ill just have to wait, Although i do really want something worthy of sharing.

faltenrock

05-23-2008, 05:19 AM

it's only up to each person, and any decision has to be accepted with no bad feelings or anger

Ayame

05-23-2008, 05:26 AM

deja true

05-23-2008, 05:40 AM

No pictures for me until I can get away from home and get this face hair gone and acquire some makeup skills. I mean who wants to see another bearded lady, eh? :heehee: Maybe next week from Be-All...

And I agree about using an age correct (or close) avatar if you're gonna use a stand in pic. Doing that also helps keep one's mind focused closer to the reality of our situations and the worst of the pink fog at bay...:)

And Kay Jessica...(stern looking smiley here)...over 50 doesn't mean I'm confined to a rocking chair, fer cripes sake! I dive, swim, rock climb and trek more than any baby-faced 20 or 30 something couch potato I know! Boomers Rule, bitch! ( my $2 worth! (inflation you know) )...

MarinaTwelve200

05-23-2008, 07:39 AM

Although I am a very private CDer, I don't have any problem showing my face---For the very reason that I consider myself unrecognizable in fem mode. The wig and makeup IS my mask.
Even I am amazed when I compare my fem with Male photos (which you will NOT see here ;) )
I dont blame those of us who wear no makeup or still look like their male selves for not posting their face, but if you do NOT look like your normal public male self (like me) why not post it? I think its kinda "cool" and a matter of personal pride that I can do it.

JoAnnDallas

05-23-2008, 08:39 AM

At first I put up a picture that did not show my head. Only because at the time I did not have a wig. Since I got my first wig, I changed my avatar to one that shows my full face. Have not looked back since.

docrobbysherry

05-23-2008, 09:41 AM

Absolutely, assuming off course that the picture posted is one of the poster and not of a fantasy wannabe. At least if one posts a pic a face other than your own at least make it the same age. I PMSL every time i see an avitar pic of a 20 yr old beauty only to read that the poster is actually 50+.
Kay

Yes that is both creepy and scary. I don't look at myself as a beauty and I don't look at myself as ugly either

1. I'm a closet CD. I'm not TG/TS, and do not plan to go out dressed. Or to come out to friends and family.

2. This is my fantasy, not yours. In my fantasy, I'm an attractive young woman. Not a homely old, bearded, balding 60 year old man in a dress.

3. Most of u wear wigs, makeup and fake figure enhancements. I use those same methods, except I skip the makeup and wear a mask instead. (Because I resemble the Frankenstein Monster in drag.) Is this such a huge difference?

4. I do not enjoy seeing me,(or any man), in my mirror or pics. I need to see what I imagine to be an attractive young woman. Someone who is a entirely different person than I. ( Remember, it's MY fantasy, not yours).

While my CD creations r certainly NOT perfect, let the CDs that R perfect throw the first stones!

Those r just my reasons, I'm sure there r many others!

tamarav

05-23-2008, 09:58 AM

Every time I read a post like this I remember when I was so incredibly paranoid that I actually closed the drapes anytime I got on the computer.

Nowadays I have trouble with neighbors driving by while I am on the front proch taking pictures before or after work. They want to stop and talk or gawk. For some reason I want to document every dressing, I am proud of the work I have put into it and want to be able to look back and see what worked and not repeat what didn't work.

When a person does not post their face picture it is entirely their option, we are all different, and unique.

Mostly I have problems restricting posting pictures. I just want others to see how happy I am...

I still get criticisms on some of my makeup, hair and dress for a 60 year old bald guy.

(damn, how did those pictures I took last night before going dancing get on here?)

Your sis,

Tami

Carly D.

05-23-2008, 10:19 AM

I agree with your "if your family or friends see your face here and recognize it why were they here" theory.. I have the same feelings.. if my family or whatever were to come here and see my picture(s) and be able to tell it was me, and ask me about it therein, my question to them would be "WHAT??" What were you doing there??? would you (I) be inclined to say welcome to the "darkside"... I doubt that they would but I have to say one thing.. I have a niece who is a bit of a bible thumper.. bible thumper in the "I believe in god on sunday but the rest of the week is for having fun".. (a hypocrite in other words).. and she would be the one that I could see finding my picture here... and would I worry about her doing so?? she might be the one odd member of the family that might could accept my crossdressing.. or not because she might just say "sinner"...

Ayame

05-23-2008, 10:37 AM

My apologies to anyone I offended with this thread for that was not my original goal with it. I figured that If I brought up some valid points it would help those who were previously scared to show their face and wanted to some possible courage to help them to change that. I am sorry once again for the discomfort that I caused because I don't want to come off as a bad person because that isn't me. However I still do hope that some of the positive points that were brought up help those who want to be seen. Maybe I am the odd ball out however even before I had any pics of me all prettified out I actually had a guy pic of me, I see nothing wrong with doing that. However I do understand that some of you do not wish to ever be seen and I understand that is a completely different situation than those of us who do but are still scaredy cats about it. Me myself I may act all tough on the forums but I'm still timid to go out in public, however over time I'm sure that will change so I so understand where you are coming from to a certain degree.

05-23-2008, 10:44 AM

because i look like a guy , because i am fat , because i am butt ugly ,
or because no one knows ...
And well i guess there is something i need to tell you :eek:
acceptance is the key ..and i did not take the picture but if you are going to play in the real world someone could snap a picture before you have a chance to hide lol
oh no someone with a camera too late

Paige.

05-23-2008, 11:03 AM

I was absolutely scared to death to post my face, mainly out fear of being identified. It took me a very long time to muster the courage. I pulled it up, covered my face with my hand, peeked through my fingers and hit the button. I look at myself everyday in the mirror but I couldn't wait to see my picture posted. It was a really good liberating feeling that washed through me, like I had passed a milestone.

Nadia-Maria

05-23-2008, 12:14 PM

I have been for many decades very deeply in the closet and when I posted my first pics, less than a year ago on Flickr , I had come out yet to nobody.
Then I posted the pics with my face carefully masked (fully or almost fully).

My avatar is a reminiscence from that era.

Little by little I opened to the world : I soon came out to my SO, I went outside for first time and I posted pics even of my face with natural hair (without make-up and wig).

However as a rule I prefer posting pics of me with a wig, cuz it makes me look better than my natural hair.

I am now about fully at ease with my dressing ,and if I were to be recognized I don't care at all.

I thank all of you for having contributed to my opening.

Kisses

Nadia

joank

05-23-2008, 12:38 PM

I am technalogically challenged and do not had the capability yet. Hang in there and it may happen yet with me.

JoAnnDallas

05-23-2008, 12:54 PM

I did a google search of my fem self. I did not find a trace to this site or the other two CD sites I visit. Thus if any of my family (other than my wife) were to say something about seeing me on this or the other two sites, then they would have had to do a fair amount of searching to come here. I would then want to know WHY they were searching for a site like this one in the first place.

RebeccaLynne

05-23-2008, 01:55 PM

Thanks Lolita, this is a really thought-provoking thread.

No one should ever feel obligated to post pictures of themselves on the internet, as there can be no reasonable expectation of privacy. Circumstances may require some degree of caution on the part of individuals in order to assure their anonymity.

OK, enough of the disclaimer.

My list of reasons for posting a picture is as follows:

1. Sharing the joy. I'm not the prettiest here, by any means. But I'm happy with who I am, and wish to share that happiness with others who come here.

2. Encouragement. If posting my picture makes anyone else more comfortable with posting their own, we all benefit.

3. Friendliness. This is the only forum to which I belong. I absolutely love the ambiance and support I've found here. I'm real and approachable, and feel a visible image "puts a face with the name".

4. Solidarity. We each enjoy CD'ing in our own way. I'm almost always dressed en femme when reading or posting, and imagine many others are, too. Even if they're not, that's my mental impression. I think of myself as a girl, and believe I'm interacting with other girls. That's why I come here! And I want others to see me as one, as well.

Now if only I had a decent camera, I'd update my profile/avatar pic. You can only do so much with a cellphone!:daydreaming:

Sweet Jane

05-23-2008, 05:34 PM

Its scary posting a photo for the first time.....all of those "what if" thoughts tumble about your brain!!!! I remember the feeling of "what the hell did I do that for?" wash over me, after putting a photo on here the first time, but then there was the feeling of genuine relief too. I suppose, by doing so, I'd made a statement saying "this is me", and I kinda feel good about myself......seeing me looking back from the page was very liberating and very satisfying in a narcissist kinda way! (laughing).......I also accept that people have differing motivations for being here as well as varying comfort levels with being seen feminised, and if you don't wish to post a photo, then thats cool by me too.

linnea

05-23-2008, 06:13 PM

I have posted pictures before, but I decided to change for awhile. Perhaps someday when I have some new pictures that look pretty good, I'll use one of them again. I do have a picture available to friends.

boy2girl31

05-23-2008, 07:05 PM

I recently changed my avatar to include my face partly because my old one had a great tan but winter ended that so it wasn't accurate but I changed it mostly because the support of you all gave me the courage to. I think that is what this thread was meant to do as well.

KateSpade83

05-23-2008, 07:15 PM

I love showing off my face and full body in pics, just to get positive feedback.

And I guess I'm one of the few lucky passable ones that go shopping in drag!

Jessie J

05-23-2008, 07:18 PM

I would love to get dressed more than I do now and post pictures. However, my family discovered my interests and freaked out and ruined that. So I'm very closeted now and I grew my beard back to appease them.

Just doesn't look as cute anymore with the fuzz on my chin.

veronica

05-23-2008, 07:20 PM

Let's also remember that one of the primary purposes of this site is to give ALL of us a place we can be comfortable , and the comfort mlevel is different to everyone.

I am very thankful to this site and everyone here, so thank you.

:love:

[
QUOTE=Rita cd12fr;1305041]And a good reason not to (yet):

I don't want to look ridiculous. I have a wig on order but I have absolutely no make-up, so at the moment the very best I could do would be to paste an extremely drab male face.

That, in itself, is not ridiculous (I hope) but it is when set atop any female outfit.

Good for you if you started work from the head down but my work in progress started at the other end.

Maybe my next step, depending what the wig actually looks like will be a full length pic but with blanked-out face.

How long then until the full face? I don't know but my experiments with TAAZ suggest that it's likely to be quite a while - my best effort so far looks marginally more feminine than Bela Lugosi in his screen make-up. :-(([/QUOTE]

trannie T

05-23-2008, 08:36 PM

It took me a long time to get a photo posted as my avatar. I am somewhat challenged when it comes to computers. I will post more photos as I become more computer literate.

Tomara

05-23-2008, 09:20 PM

boy2girl31

05-23-2008, 09:25 PM

speaking of showing your face I was told you can't see mine so look at the thread "first t-party" then say you can't see it:tongueout

CD Susan

05-23-2008, 10:03 PM

Lolita, we all have reasons for not posting pics showing our faces. I have nothing against anyone who does not show thier face on this site. I understand completely and this will never be an issue with me. I joined this site six weeks ago and for the first four of those weeks I chose to not show my face. Two weeks ago I posted an avatar pic of myself and am glad that I did. I want to be as open and sincere with everyone as I can be and this was my way of doing that. We all are different and have different situations so each one of us has to deal with our own situation in the best way that we can.

Tomara

05-23-2008, 10:08 PM

Thankyou Susan :hugs: Tomara

Nikki K

05-24-2008, 05:50 AM

Being able to show your face (the door to your soul) is all about your inner emotions, how you feel about yourself, and the image you want to portray to others.
I for one have only just spoken, for the very first time in 40 years, of my TG to my therapist. Plus, I joined this site a little over a week ago and this has been the first time EVER that I have discussed my feelings with anyone.
The result of all this is that I'm now feeling considerably more comfortable with myself, my feelings, and my sexuality. Therefore, expect to see a new photo in the near future; a photo of someone less ashamed and much more at ease with revealing their soul.

Nikki

Mitch23

05-24-2008, 06:03 AM

I much prefer to communicate with those who show their pics. Speaking personally, there is no possible way that family, friends or work colleagues would recognise me from my femme pics. I belong to other sites where I get a lot of requests for a meet with 'admirers'. I ignore those who do not have at least an avatar

mitch

Emily Anderson

05-24-2008, 06:35 AM

I would gladly post my pic, but I rarely do the whole makeup thing, and don't have any worthy pictures to post yet. On the other hand, joining this group has renewed my interest in exploring further than "just" dressing up, so I expect to be trying out some makeup, and purchasing a new wig soon. Maybe a photo will follow, we'll see.

Anyway, I understand those that do not want to post their picture, for whatever reason, and I feel strongly that we as a group should not "push" people into doing things with which they are not comfortable.

Michelle S

05-24-2008, 06:55 AM

Avatar pictures can be viewed by non-members. On Myspace I use the same avatar as I do here, but there I also post pictures that can be seen by friends only.

Although my job is secure, that is not the case for some. In many states in the U.S. you can be legally fired for cross dressing even when way from work. See:

http://www.tgirls.net/news/news56.htm
http://www.aclu.org/lgbt/transgender/11830prs20020123.html
http://www.brgslaw.com/management_memos/2002/2002-21/memo.html#06

"The courts have uniformly held that Title VII does not prohibit discrimination based on sexual orientation, transvestism, transsexualism or gender identity issues."

TSchapes

05-24-2008, 07:21 AM

Absolutely, assuming off course that the picture posted is one of the poster and not of a fantasy wannabe. At least if one posts a pic a face other than your own at least make it the same age. I PMSL every time i see an avitar pic of a 20 yr old beauty only to read that the poster is actually 50+. I'm afraid any credibility of that poster posting outdoor adventures just goes out the window.

Be honest be true, I respect those that don't because they are still "getting" there and they should take as much time as they need.

Kay

I've been posting my pictures here. I even asked my wife to find me here. I did not tell her my ID. She searched and searched and could not find me. I finally told her and sent her a link. Once I did that, then she could see the resemblance.

Now I'm sorry I look younger than my age. 50 is the new 30 these days.

I'm also going to be at the SCC this fall, live and in person. There is no reason for me to post a "bogus" picture of myself. In fact I'm working on my business cards to hand out to gals that I meet down there. This is my first attempt:

http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm4/TracySchapes/VerticalBC-Tracy3-sm.jpg

Other than the lettering on that picture, it's been cropped and the blue background has been brightened.

We all have our different levels of comfort. They are all valid. If someone is manipulating their photo somehow, they should explain what they are doing. I did this with the "masking" pics I did. Not everyone is out, some so far in that if they do out themselves they could loose their family and livelihood. I think we can get a false sense of security posting here. There are still a lot of mean and vindictive people out there.

Oh, and Kay I know you were not talking about me in your post. :love:

Love, Tracy

FanciJewel

05-24-2008, 07:28 AM

Taking pictures of your self is quite a skill requiring a camera, the knowledge to use it, and the time to do it. Getting the images from the camera to the computer, especially for the first time, is also a skill set that requires time, and the patience to figure it out. I have accomplished step one, getting the pictures on the camera. No w to get the pictures from the camera to the computer and then to this site. Last week I tried getting the picture from the camera to my avitar, but was told that the file was too large. Now I have to figure out how to get around that problem. I am sure there are many more like me who are in this learning curve. They want to post but haven't figured out how yet.
Fanci

Violetgray

05-24-2008, 07:39 AM

1. I'm a closet CD. I'm not TG/TS, and do not plan to go out dressed. Or to come out to friends and family.

2. This is my fantasy, not yours. In my fantasy, I'm an attractive young woman. Not a homely old, bearded, balding 60 year old man in a dress.

3. Most of u wear wigs, makeup and fake figure enhancements. I use those same methods, except I skip the makeup and wear a mask instead. (Because I resemble the Frankenstein Monster in drag.) Is this such a huge difference?

4. I do not enjoy seeing me,(or any man), in my mirror or pics. I need to see what I imagine to be an attractive young woman. Someone who is a entirely different person than I. ( Remember, it's MY fantasy, not yours).

While my CD creations r certainly NOT perfect, let the CDs that R perfect throw the first stones!

Those r just my reasons, I'm sure there r many others!

You make interesting point DocRobby, except for a few things.

1.) I feel as though the examples you provide in points 2 and 4 don't exactly hold up because that is what you want to see when you look at yourself. Of course you're entitled, so have fun! But that's a different matter than what one chooses to show the rest of us. In other words, you can't really say "Who are you to judge my fantasy" when you choose to share them with us in the first place.

2.) I don't think that when she was talking about "Why you should show your face" she was even thinking about maskers. At least you're showing a face, even if it isn't yours. That's different than say, a blank oval where a human face should be. If I were out on the street I would rather see a guy in a latex mask than someone with no face!

When I look at pics of trannies, the face is the best part for me.. that takes the most skill, and when done well, I admire their work. That being said, I will say that alot of the people to block that faces out (and just about all of the maskers here) are WAY better in the body department than I am! I'm jealous! Their pics arent worthless. Its just that for me personally showing a pic with no face is like reading a book with the final chapter ripped out.

Nadia-Maria

05-24-2008, 09:00 AM

Please dont judge someone on what they do or dont do.

Of course it is preferable not to "judge" someone else.

However most people would be very pleased to be judged essentially according to their acts (=what they do) instead of according to their skin color or gender or sexual orientation...

Kisses

Nadia

Chari

05-24-2008, 09:37 AM

Not that I don't want to post my pic, but I have to agree with FanciJewel, due to technical difficulties beyond my control - not having the knowledge or computer/camera equipment - at this time, I am unable to show my face or anything else!
Enjoy life, Chari

Sissy_in_pink

05-26-2008, 06:53 AM

Well I may have this wrong, but don't you have to be a member to be able to view content on this site. If so then anyone who will see you is not in a position to say anything without incriminating themselves.

Well guess what I am wrong, I just logged out and then tried to view content, holly cow content can be viewed:o

Ok so I was wrong, but I do have a suggestion is it possible to set this site up so that visitors can read posting, but cannot see any pictures unless they are a member and are logged in, then maybe more members would post pictures without fear of being seen by anyone who finds this site.:2c:

Maria2222

05-26-2008, 09:02 AM

I probably wouldn't have shown my face before I used makeup, but now it seems natural to show it.

Nikki K

05-26-2008, 11:31 AM

There! I've done it!
But you're not going to get a CU until I've had a chance to put some make-up on! ;)

Sedona

05-26-2008, 12:02 PM

I am sure that everyone myself included who has chosen to not post there pictures here has a valid reason for doing so. Please dont judge someone on what they do or dont do. Everyone here is there own person Tomara

Yep, agree. I'd posted a couple of face pictures here in the past (because of inquiries), but my SO flipped out about it. I don't live in an area that has just laws against CD discrimination, so it's her worst nightmare that I'd be outed. My relationship with her is more important than mine with folks on this board.

Besides, I don't have any desire (really!) to go out dressed, so see no reason to show my face. If I'm not showing my made-up face on the street, why should I show it here?

Maybe this will all change in the future, but it's what's happening now.

For all you girls who do "show," more power to you! I am fine with whatever choices folks make for their selves, as long as it doesn't infringe on anybody else's rights/happiness.

Cheers!

azalea

05-26-2008, 01:39 PM

There's already a picture of me in a dress somewhere on the internet to be publicly seen by anyone who knows where to look thanks to one of my brother's asshole friends, but I'm always afraid to post things on sites like this, especially in the main section. I don't wear a wig or anything when I CD so I'm rather recognizable no matter which gender I'm dressed as. So I don't know.

Carly D.

05-27-2008, 05:58 PM