GUILT: other peoples' clothes

[susan2010]

I started wearing my sister's petticoat, then mom's slips and pettipants. Later, I wore my first, then second wives' slips, panties, nightgowns, pantyhose, dresses, and even squeezed into their dresses when they were away. I know I didn't have the opportunity to have my own fem clothes when I was 4 or 5, but I feel guilty having worn other peoples' clothes without permission, and downright weird for wearing mom's and sister's underwear. Now I make it a point never to wear wife's clothes.
Anyone else?

[veronica]

As a child and still experimenting options are limited. :sad:

But yes as an adult you should feel guilty. clothes, especially ,under things can be very personal.

[Notbychoice]

Weird? No. Jealous? Yes

[Angie G]

When I first started dressing there was no other choice but to wear other peoples clothes And now my wife and I swap thing but not undies. :hugs:
Angie

[susan2010]

True, I didn't have much choice when I was little. I don't remember my sister ever dressing me up, but one time my older brother spoke pointedly about the effects on boys of being dressed up when young. He was refering to an in-law of his, but I thought he might have had been implying more than he said.

[Melissa73]

yes, i do feel guilt over wearing my sisters clothing, as i grew up. BUt i also have had the tables turned on me, and thats how i figured out my guilt. ABout a year ago......i was living at the motel, where i was employed (Basically, working for my room) and it was a good arrangement. anyways, we were a loosly run motel, and well on a day i was out, one housekeeper had opened my room up, and found one of 2 of my bras. (and she took them). ASND HERE I WAS, IN THE CLOSET, AND I COULDNT TELL anyone!!!! or they too would know.

yet, i suddenly realized what i felt w/ my clothes disappearing, my sister must have felt the saME. i guess what goesa around, comes around

[boy2girl31]

I feel guilt a lot some of my clothes used to belong to my girlfriend who died it probally sounds weird to still have them(really weird after 12 years) but I don't wear them anymore we both did when she was here but I loved her with all I had and can't bring myself to get rid of them. So the guilt goes on.

[CD Susan]

I think that the vast majority of us started out dressing by wearing our moms or sisters clothes. When you start doing this as a child there is no other option. I do not feel guilty about it at all. That is just the way it was for me and was the start of a lifetime of being a cd.

[Angela-Russell]

I started by borrowing my sisters clothes, & if I had a chance would try on things belonging to female relatives. I suppose there's a little bit of guilt at the back of my mind, but there really wasn't a choice, I couldn't stop myself from doing it, & I was too young to buy things then. I started buying my own female things at 16, when I started working, & eventually stopped borrowing when I had enough of my own. My wife was very understanding & helpful when we got married & has bought lots of girly things for me, so I have never had to borrow anything of hers. If she buys herself something new & I like it she will always let me try it on, & will usually ask if I would like one too. So I don't have any guilt about trying her things, as I always ask first.

[Amy Hepker]

Go out and buy your own. Don't be scared, ENJOY

[karynspanties]

I only feel guilty about the items that I "aquired" when I was younger (teens).
A teen or even a preteen going and buying a slip or panties......was not going to happen. So alternative collecting was required.:devil:

[satin_luva]

When I was 14 my father and stepmother discovered my Aladdins' cave under my bed during the middle of the week. On the Sunday, the day after they sat me down and... interrogated me, my stepmum found out that I had flogged some of her lingerie as well. The next few months were more than awkward for everyone.:doh::eek::Angry3::argue:

[Emily Anderson]

I'm sure there are plenty of CD's on this very forum who are still borrowing their wive's/SO's clothes without their permission. I know I would have been if I had subscribed to this group eight years ago.

It's not an easy thing to accept oneself as a crossdresser, and having been there, I can well understand those who are so deeply in the closet that they don't have the courage to go out an buy their own stuff, are afraid of what the reactions at the store might be, are afraid of their "stash" being found by the wife etc. etc.

I'm not condoning the practice. I'm simply saying that for some crossdressers it seems to be the only way to manage their situation, and I can understand that. It took me many years to realize that I would never be able to give up, and finally decided that I would have to do something else (i.e. tell the wife that I was a CD...), all the while feeling very guilty about "borrowing" her clothes.

We should to encourage CD's to step up and take their responsibilities, but also be able to understand where they are coming from...

[melisss2u]

Had no sisters so moms clothes were all that i could borrow

[Joy Carter]

Guilty as charged.......But really what would the reaction have been, had I had a stash and it was found. Years latter the guilt and fear is in the past. Half my closet is girlie things. :D

[TGMarla]

I agree with what susan said. I don't really have any guilt about it. It is what it is. And after all, it's just clothing. Every now and again, I still borrow an item or two from my wife. It doesn't diminish my feelings for her one bit. She borrows my things as well. I'm very careful whenever I borrow anything from anybody, be it tools from a friend, or articles of clothing from my wife. I mostly wear all my own stuff, but I'm not going to go on some guilt trip if I borrow a slip every once in a while.

[Cristi]

I wouldn't be surprised to find that almost all of us start with 'borrowed' clothes. Between access to your own things, and guilt about what you are doing it a difficult time.

Once you get a bit older, have a better living situation (with your own closet, instead of having hiding places under the bed, etc) and have more self confidence you can start acquiring things for yourself in ways that don't involve 'borrowing'.

Now there is no guilt left, because EVERYTHING I own I bought with my own money, either over the counter or by mail order. They are not "girl's clothes", they are MY clothes.

Just think of the borrowing as a stage we all go through. It is almost forced upon us until we gain enough self-confidence to move beyond it.

[Ayame]

I never really felt guilt because I've never really been a fan of undergarments, for me it was always the look that gave me a rush and not the feel of anything. I think there is a huge difference between trying on a dress or undergarments. I think trying on clothing is not so taboo but trying on undergarments of someone elses is going to far.

:2c:

[Vivian Best]

Like many of you the only clothes I had access to was my mother's. After I married I would borrow some of my wife's after she had gained some weight. I have absolutely no guilt about borrowing from either.

[Sharon]

I used to take my sister's things -- you name it, I wore it -- and I collected quite a sizable wardrobe over the course of a couple years. I apologized to her years later for my thievery, but she said that she never knew! Gads....

[Vieja]

I don't feel any guilt about wearing mother's and sisters clothing when I was just starting this journey that still has a way to go. But now I would never wear another's clothing except if we were sharing the experience of trying on each other's dresses. I have only had that opportunity once. Darn.

Vieja

[Julie York]

Here's another angle.

Since buying my own stuff and indulging my fantasies .....It just isn't the same heart attack oh god finger trembling feeling faint experience it used to be.

[adelle]

:o me 2 GUILTY

[debbeelee1]

My SO and I share our wardrobe and we think that it's pretty cool!

[Farrah]

I started wearing my sister's petticoat, then mom's slips and pettipants. Later, I wore my first, then second wives' slips, panties, nightgowns, pantyhose, dresses, and even squeezed into their dresses when they were away. I know I didn't have the opportunity to have my own fem clothes when I was 4 or 5, but I feel guilty having worn other peoples' clothes without permission, and downright weird for wearing mom's and sister's underwear. Now I make it a point never to wear wife's clothes.
Anyone else?

I agree, especially when you see them in the dress you had on. I felt like this when I was a home with sisters and mother things.

[Dragster]

I too started with my mother's clothes (no sister), and when married, my wife's. I bought her many "sexy" items of underwear because I wanted to see her in them, especially in the bedroom, but she didn't really like that idea, and wore them very infrequently. At the time I think I wore them more often than she did!

As her tastes have become more conservative over the years, I no longer feel her clothes are as exciting as when she was younger. I still like to try on anything she buys (even the ones she returns) even though my own small stash has grown to satisfy most of my needs. Funnily enough, over half my stash are clothes she has thrown out, but I have intercepted them on the way to the bin or the charity shop! I still feel closer to her whenever I put on her lingerie or one of her skirts or dresses; it adds to the excitement for me, knowing that she's been in there too. Does anyone else feel that?

Tony

[susan2010]

To Debbeelee:
Sharing is a little different; sharing is giving permission, not sneaking into someone else's drawers.
I'd love to share clothes, but that's not going to happen.

[susan2010]

To: Dragster;
It's not clean from your post if your SO knows you wear her things, including things she thought she got rid of.
Are you keeping all dressing from her?

[paulaluvssz8]

been borrowing moms, aunts, and wifes clothing for years. Just don't have the opportunity to purchase much for myself. So I guess that since my wife and I wear nearly the same size then it is good for me....

[whitelace]

:battingeyelashes:
Hi girls btw this is my first post
I had quite an interesting ritual going when I was in my teens . I lived only a few blocks from a large hospital in the inner city and Sometimes I would deliberately walk past the laundry and watch the pretty young nurses wash and dry their clothes later on I would check out the dryers to see what was left behind then as time qiucky past I became bolder and became quite the daring theif. I unfortunately I had no sister If I had I would probably have adored her.... so you all will just have to do. I'll go a little further and tell you some of my other daring escapades I'm in kind of a tell all mood tonight I had a job that put me in college dorms (girls) frequently well you guessed it I found myself going through hampers for freshly scented panties .I kept up this practice until the oportunity no longer existed Guilt no actually not a shred of it. And all this a precurser of what was to to be a wonderful and exciting life. As an adult now I look back and shake my head ....and smile....lacie

[Melissag]

When i was younger i took every chance to wear girls clothes. I wore so many peoples, mostly my sisters and moms. When ever my sister would have friends sleep over i would try on their stuff. While visiting female cousins i would try on their stuff. Looking back i feel no guilt whatsoever, in fact if i was in a situation to wear their things again, i would. I only wear stuff that fits and i dont cause it any harm. I only ever took one item of clothing and that was from my sister.

[Dragster]

To: Dragster;
It's not clean from your post if your SO knows you wear her things, including things she thought she got rid of.
Are you keeping all dressing from her?

Susan,
My wife's in the stage where she "doesn't want to know" about my CDing, and has been for almost 20 years. I made a last attempt to get her to understand my needs 3 years ago, just after I found this site, but progress is painfully slow, and she's still in the out-of-sight, out-of-mind mode.

For many years I wore her clothes in secret, but in one of our conversations, she suggested that I don't need to buy any clothes because I could wear hers. She's paranoid of me being seen buying womens clothes for myself, or even of a parcel going astray if I use mail order, and it was her means of eliminating that risk; not a tacit approval of what I was doing. She's also unaware that I've intercepted clothes that she'd "thrown out". I'm not proud of deceiving her, but I find little alternative to continue my occasional CDing without causing her grief, until we get to some agreement; and that's difficult when she doesn't want to talk about it. I even bought "My Husband Betty" to act as an icebreaker, and a prompt for her questions. She claims to have read it (I doubt she's more than skimmed it) but had no questions to ask! "There's nothing there I didn't already know!"

I love her so much that I'll never consider leaving her after 39 years of marriage (and that feeling is mutual), so I'll just plod along hoping that one day I can get a real dialogue going on the subject. The reason I made the post was because I felt a special thrill wearing her clothes because it made me feel a little closer to her, and I wondered if others felt the same.

Tony

[Emily Anderson]

The reason I made the post was because I felt a special thrill wearing her clothes because it made me feel a little closer to her, and I wondered if others felt the same.

Many of us feel the same. Just a pity that it's a deluded sense of reality as far as connecting to the SO is concerned. Those (SO's) that do not understand us in a way such as you described never will, because unfortunately they are living in a closet of their own.

 

[susan2010]

Dragster:
I agree you don't have many alternatives. I know how difficult it can be with an unsympathic spouse, and I respect your love for her. It's great that at least she acknowleges that you dress, and you have permission to wear her clothes.
Best wishes

[Alys]

I've never done the whole 'take without consent' thing :3 But growing up in my teenage years, me and my girlfriends all wore close enough clothing sizes that we communally shared pretty much all our outfits.

[dominique]

As I'm still in the closet to my family. I have no alternative to "borrow" my wife's clothes. It would be impossible to get my own clothes as we are on a very tight budget and my wife does the home accounts. She would notice any money spent.

[Karren H]

Nope.... Never ever felt guilt over borrowing someones clothing... Mothers, Step-mothers... Girl friends... Sisters... Wifes... My 10th grade English teachers who was renting a room from us... And I tended to select girl friends that were more my size... For some strange reason.. :D.

And most were returned... But like others have said... There are very few options... And that doesn't make it right...

[Emeralddragon]

Well in the beginning with myself and my girlfriend when i was first realising I liked to dress i would borrow an item of hers and shed find it funny more so than anything else so i never felt guilty much. A little but not much. Of course these days it doesnt happen much cos we normally share stuff. Though if she gets something and doesnt wear it in time i might take a liking to it and wear it first. Then i feel guilty. Ah well its her own fault for leaving clothes there for me to find :P

[alisontv_uk]

i used to borrow a family friends clothes when i was younger. nowadays i have my own. i dont feel guilty about it either. it got me here to where i am now. and gave me the thoughts of what i want in life now.

Alison
x

[Angela Dressing]

All I had was my moms clothes when I started dressing. I was more concerned with getting caught then who the clothes belonged too. Everything she had was a good fit and what I wanted to wear. My wife seems to be clueless of my closet CD life, unfortunate for me she isnt into dresses and what she has is mostly to big for me.:daydreaming:

[Kristen Marie]

There are very few items of my wife that I wear or have worn, mostly because of the size difference. But in my early years, I would frequently borrow my friends' older sisters clothing. They had great stuff!! I don't really feel guilty about that.

[RachelVTTV]

I didn't have a sister so ended up with Moms stuff. One time I was house sitting for a friend. As it turns out we were about the same size and had a field day. When she came home she didn't notice, or didn't say anything.:2c:

[Donna Michelle]

I never felt guilty about "borrowing" other people's clothes. The urge to dress was so strong that it was more important. I didn't damage the clothes and I often took things that they didn't need, fit or miss or I would put them back (only to borrow them again).

I felt more guilt over keeping my dressing a secret from my wife for the first 5 years of marriage. Then I only wore panties and bras, but I was still secretly wearing her other clothes. I recently came out and wanted my own clothes. She bought anything I wanted and thought of everything!

I don't need to borrow things. I used to tell her when we got married that what is mine is hers and what is hers is mine. We share everything. She had NO idea I was talking about clothes. She was thinking of the cars, house and furniture. All I think about is clothes, jewelry, perfume and stuff like that. :D

[Rachel32533]

None! no guilt for me.. I enjoyed my sister's and mothers clothes for a long time. My father and brother didn't have what I wanted! I loved to wear my older sister's dresses, and would often dress completely. I even told her years later that I had worn her cloths when younger, and she told me that she had seen me dressed several times and could tell that I was so excited that she kept it a secret. I only wish she had told me then.

[KandisTX]

I had both mother and sisters wardrobes to choose from. When I came out to Mom, she promised she wouldn't tell sister, but there are times now I wish I could/would have told her then. She might have been a great ally to my dressing. I would like to find her again (we lost touch years ago) and tell her that I am sorry for taking her things without permission, but do I feel guilty for wearing it? Nope, not for wearing it, it was what I wanted to wear, the guilt I feel is for stealing the things I did for my secret stash.

Kandis:love::rose2:

[Lara Smith]

Except for the first time when I was very, very young, and tried on my mom's panties for the first time, I never did it again. That was a fluke, but it set the tone and I was hooked. I didn't "acquire" any panties until I was in my teens. We lived in Phoenix at the time, and summer nights were sensuously warm. And in the mid 60's, everyone hung their wash on the line overnight. Back then, everyone had an alley. It was a simple matter to stroll the alleys in the wee hours and see an endless array of panties and bras and slips on backyard clotheslines. Now and again, when they were too pretty and feminine to resist, some of them disappeared. It was wrong. I am a very honest, and I believe, moral person. Did I feel bad? I have to be honest and say no. I never took more than one or two from many, many pair hanging crisp and lovely on the lines. Sometimes there would be a line with ten or fifteen pairs of panties and often matching bras on a single clothesline. Nothing else! The excitement and anticipation of taking them and waiting to get home and wear them in my darkened bedroom was an incredible turn on and so exciting. I would lie in bed in a beautiful pair of nylon full cut or bikini panties and lacey underwire bra and imagine how beautiful and sexy the woman was who had worn them, and I would become them, transported into a world I would come to love.

That went on for a brief period of time. Then it stopped and with one exception, never happened again. Once I finally fully dressed many years later, I always bought my own things whether through catalogs, or later as I became more confident, in person at the store.

I have been married for thirty years and have never worn anything belonging to my wife. She has worn some of mine though! We were young, and we all know how driven we are. Looking back, it never occurred to me to just go into a store and buy what I wanted. Then again, the allure of knowing I was wearing things that belonged to a woman or girl that obviously loved to dress as feminine as possible underneath was such a powerful draw…….