Feeling pretty vs Being pretty

[TGMarla]

I just got a new dress. (Big shock, huh!) It's very pretty, in fact much prettier in person than I thought it would be from the pictures of it I saw when I bought it. But the best thing about it was that when I wore it, I actually felt pretty. And that felt good.

Many of us go to great lengths to appear pretty, or as pretty as we can be as genetic men. It's often a tough row to hoe, and the results can be spotty. One day our results can turn out much better than on other days. Sometimes the results, despite all the primping and preening we can muster, are that we look like guys in dresses with lipstick pasted on for some kind of effect. Sometimes we look in the mirror, shake our heads, and sigh, "You just can't dress up a pig."

Other days, the results can be much more pleasing. Sometimes I'll dress up all the way, and I'll think, "Now that's a pretty dress." But this time, I actually felt pretty, rather than just thinking that my clothes were pretty. It was a deeper, more inward feeling. So I got to thinking, there's a difference between looking pretty, and feeling pretty. And feeling pretty felt pretty good!

Your thoughts?

[CatAttack]

If I weren't a crossdresser I don't think I'd ever be able to understand why women like clothes, makeup, shoes, etc so much and take so long to get ready. It's because it feels pretty. I can't quite describe the feeling but I'm pretty sure you all know it.

[Katrina]

I think that is the difference between a good gender day and a bad one. On a bad one, I feel like a guy in a dress (if I'm at least in a dress). Its even worse if I'm totally in guy mode. :( On a good day, I feel pretty and the guy in the dress disappears.

[Karren H]

.... I guess it's all in your attitude... I feel pretty and look pertty (IMHO) no matter how I'm dressed or which gender I'm dressed as.... :)

[Rachel Morley]

Absolutely agree with you! Feeling pretty and cute is very important to me. Sometimes I can wear the same outfit, same makeup routine (same colors and everything), same wig, every thing's the same yet, one time I think I look cute, the next time I think my make up looks bad and the clothes make me look way less feminine than before. :sad:

When I mentioned this to my wife she said: "now you know how women feel. Sometimes our confidence about how we look is there, sometimes it's not"

Being a crossdresser has helped me show empathy for women in so many different ways! :)

[Shannen]

...it's like the stars are aligned... doesn't happen every day, but when it does! :D:D:D

[jamie55]

Hi Marla: I see myself as a guy in a dress, but show me where it's written that only gg's can be pretty. Even when I'm moving a rig all covered in mud and frost I still feel pretty because of what I'm wearing underneath it all. I really believe pretty is a state of mind not a state of apperance to others. Hold your head high, and don't lower your eyes for anyone.

[boy2girl31]

I have yet to find a day that I think I lookpretty but the feeling is there 95% of the time. If not for that feeling I wouldn't be here. I think it comes from liking myself no matter who I am.

I hope you and everyone here can have this feeling always for happiness comes to those who seek it.

[Paula Rae]

Hey Marla,
"I guess it's all in your attitude... I feel pretty and look pretty" (line stolen from Karren) every time I dress, which is daily.
Of course living as a woman 24/7 has a lot to do with it.
Most days I dress as a normal GG, Peddle pushers, nice top and a minimum of makeup.
See my album on my profile page, it has pictures of me dressed normal.

Paula Rae

[victoriamwilliams1]

I have had those days too and when I look at the photos it shows. On my days I feel pretty I feel like I can take on the world.

[docrobbysherry]

There r times that think I look rediculous, fat, or badly matched. But, when I think I LOOK pretty, I also FEEL pretty. I think so, not sure.
Maybe it is different when u go out dressed? Because u know people r looking at u?

[Jeannie Bingham]

I think it's just a good day as opposed to a bad day as well. I'm sure we all get them, I know I do. It doesn't seem to matter if I'm dressed as a woman or a man, feeling like s**t for no reason whatsoever just seems to be part of life.

[Sara Jessica]

Like any other girl I guess, there are times when everything about the look comes together perfectly and as a result, I truly feel as pretty as I hope I look. Moments like these make my confidence go sky high!!!

[carolinebrookes]

Hi Marla, Reading your thread made a U2 song pop into my head.
Some of the words for you

"Some days are dry
Some days are leaky
Some days come clean
Some days are squeaky
And some days just drop in on us
Some days are better than others"

The words fit my sentiment fairly acurately. I think that you can have days that are not so good and tend to go with whatever attitude you may have.

I know that on some occasions I land lucky and manage to look like a semi decent looking girl. Some days are leaky though and I end up looking like Robin Williams in a dress! :D

[Claire3]

Most days,i think i look great.A new outfit provides a rush to the blood.Ive a couple of new wigs on order,my senses are tingling!:)

[Alana65]

Absolutely agree with you! Feeling pretty and cute is very important to me. Sometimes I can wear the same outfit, same makeup routine (same colors and everything), same wig, every thing's the same yet, one time I think I look cute, the next time I think my make up looks bad and the clothes make me look way less feminine than before. :sad:

When I mentioned this to my wife she said: "now you know how women feel. Sometimes our confidence about how we look is there, sometimes it's not"

Being a crossdresser has helped me show empathy for women in so many different ways! :)

Rachel,

I feel the same way......you took the words right out of my mouth.

[Alicia_lynn419]

I have been saying for a long time... (crossdressing) is less about how you look, and more about how you FEEL.


KUDOS!

[JoanFlores]

It's all in your head dear, for me if I feel ok, then any thing I have on is good, but if I feel bad or sad, nothing works.

[Angie G]

I can look pretty from the neck down nut much can help above that. But I alway feel pretty and feminine and that puts me in a happy place. :hugs:
Angie

[linnea]

I just got a new dress. (Big shock, huh!) It's very pretty, in fact much prettier in person than I thought it would be from the pictures of it I saw when I bought it. But the best thing about it was that when I wore it, I actually felt pretty. And that felt good.

Many of us go to great lengths to appear pretty, or as pretty as we can be as genetic men. It's often a tough row to hoe, and the results can be spotty. One day our results can turn out much better than on other days. Sometimes the results, despite all the primping and preening we can muster, are that we look like guys in dresses with lipstick pasted on for some kind of effect. Sometimes we look in the mirror, shake our heads, and sigh, "You just can't dress up a pig."

Other days, the results can be much more pleasing. Sometimes I'll dress up all the way, and I'll think, "Now that's a pretty dress." But this time, I actually felt pretty, rather than just thinking that my clothes were pretty. It was a deeper, more inward feeling. So I got to thinking, there's a difference between looking pretty, and feeling pretty. And feeling pretty felt pretty good!

Your thoughts?

My first thought is to thank you for expressing this. I have had similar feelings on several occasions, and when I really feel pretty, it is fantastic. I was shopping at Lane Bryant one day, and in one particular outfit--it was the right fit and the right colors and the right style--I just felt pretty. I didn't want to take it off. And it was more than how it looked. It was how it felt.
I'm really happy for you for having had that feeling. I hope that you feel it many more times.
And thank you so much for sharing it.

[TiffanyTgirl]

I think clothing evokes certain feelings in all of us and being the unique individuals we are, we can enjoy the best of both worlds. I love high heels, and feel really complete when I wear my wig. I know my general build isn't all that femme, but the clothes make me feel it anyway.

[gennee]

How you carry yourself will reflect how you feel about yourself. The day I threw caution to the wind was the day I felt pretty. I feel it all the time when I'm dressed.

Gennee

:doll:

[CD Susan]

I think it is all about having the right attitude. If your mind is just right you will feel pretty. The clothes are only the outward appearance, what is projected from within completes the whole package and that determines how we feel about what we see when we look in the mirror.

[carolinewalker_2000]

In my opinion, if you don't "feel pretty" you won't look pretty, no matter how competent you make-up, etc is. Being "girly" has to start inside.

[charlie]

I feel pretty when the outfit is right, the nails match, the shoes are sexy and when I look in the mirror I think I look good. I feel and look pretty when I get to where I'm going and people come up to me and tell me that I look good to them as well. I'm just a sucker for compliments!

[SherriePall]

When you feel pretty and look pretty, well, you've got it going on, girl!

[Sinthia]

.... I guess it's all in your attitude... I feel pretty and look pertty (IMHO) no matter how I'm dressed or which gender I'm dressed as.... :)

I'm with you on that, Karen. Feeling pretty is a mental thing, and we all control our own mental feelings, so I feel SUPER all the time. On a scale of 1-10, I start my day at 13, and as the day goes on, I get even better. And when I get home and put a dress or skirt on, I zoom up to at least 20.

[adrienner99]

I suspect GGs go through the same thing. Just being female doesn't guarantee a girl will be pretty--but I bet they feel pretty sometimes...

It really grates me to see GGs who are obviously female but dress in T-shirts, jeans and sneakers. Don't they WANT to look pretty???? (I know, it's a lot of work for them, too.)

There have been very few times when I felt I looked pretty--but many when I felt, if not pretty, at least feminine...The muddle of feelings CDs go through never seems to end...

Wouldn't trade it, though.

[TGMarla]

It really grates me to see GGs who are obviously female but dress in T-shirts, jeans and sneakers. Don't they WANT to look pretty????


(Insert little smiley thingy that looks like a can of worms)

[Sara Jessica]

It really grates me to see GGs who are obviously female but dress in T-shirts, jeans and sneakers. Don't they WANT to look pretty????

OK, I'll take the bait. Who says a gg (or any of us) cannot look pretty in jeans and a t-shirt? I wore such an outfit on yesterday at home, jeans and a little cotton spagetti strap cami top with flip flops, a perfect summery look. And I truly felt pretty but was wondering if my arms and shoulders are feminine enough to pull it off when out and about. I hope they are and I have a really honest tg friend who will tell me the truth. But the point is that any girl can be devestatingly beautiful no matter what she wears, even if many tg girls have in mind that beauty is only equated to skirts/dresses, pantyhose and high heels.

[Joanne f]

Feelings come from the inside so when you got those, you have everything .:)






joanne

[Donna Michelle]

I know I could never look pretty (to others or myself), but I often feel pretty when dressed up. I feel happier. I am not even a good looking guy. Good thing my wife looks at the person inside.

[Melora]

Marla, Your words..
"Other days, the results can be much more pleasing. Sometimes I'll dress up all the way, and I'll think, "Now that's a pretty dress." But this time, I actually felt pretty, rather than just thinking that my clothes were pretty. It was a deeper, more inward feeling. So I got to thinking, there's a difference between looking pretty, and feeling pretty. And feeling pretty felt pretty good!"

And it Does feel GREAT! And I know what you mean.. It is sometimes a Rare feeling when dressing up too. Like putting lots of time and effort to look great and when you take pictures, they all just come out horrible, when you look at them the next day.. But when you took the Pictures.. You felt Awsome! Sometimes the Feeling outdoes the doing.
It does not happen every time that I dress up either.. Just every couple of times, that I feel like I "Just got it Right", whether from make up, clothes or both...

Pretty is in the eyes of the beholder.. And the most important beholder is You!
I agree Marla...

[Mitzi]

The only time I don't feel pretty/cute en femme is when an outfit just doesn't work. Otherwise, I look in the mirror and say, gee, you're pretty...

So it's time to capture that beauty in pics!! Ugh! That's not what I saw in the mirror...the lighting must be wrong...:sad:

Mitzi

[deja true]

Feeling pretty is a very good thing, but several, like Jamie and boy2girl and others have hinted at, feeling good about yourself, in either mode, is really the important thing.

I'll never be 'pretty' along the lines of 'just the right make-up' or 'just the right clothes' , but I will ever be happy with who I am now.

Many of you have steered my unhelpful thinking in that regard to a much better place of self acceptance. Be all you can be, girls. It's not really about the clothes.

[tiffany84]

I don't go out while dressed, nor do I think I would enjoy going out dressed. I have a beard, and have no problem with it. My style of dresses being the bridal and formal ones, I think I'd look pretty funny to anyone else. But I love feeling pretty.

[Jane G]

On the right day in the right mood I feel wonderfuly pretty in girl mode. Can't say I've ever felt that way in guy mode. If I dress up special I might feel smart maybe even hansom, in a good light, but never pretty. Pretty is reserved for Jane and Jane loves to look and feel pretty.

[CharleneT]

.........

Be all you can be, girls. It's not really about the clothes.

Now those are WORDS TO LIVE BY !!

All to often we gurls concentrate too much attention on the outward trappings. I know I am guilty as sin of this. I know I'll "pass" and be pretty when I believe it myself and do not look for others to tell me or validate me or whatever.

Charlene