Advice please- my wife wants to join here but is apprehensive

[Toni_Lynn]

As I've mentioned in several of my other posts, my wife is very very supportive of my crossdressing. She encouarges it and raises me up to levels of accepatance that I only ever dreamed off.

As we talked this morning over coffee, we chatted about her joining in the fun here at the forum. She's a bit reluctant for a few reasons.

One seems to be that she it might be invading some private space of mine -- not that I have anything to hide from her (and she has said this herself).

I've told her that I don't mind her joining in and commenting on our various girltalk discussions. I've read many of the threads I've posted to and those to which I haven't posted to her.

So, how can I convince her that

a) she not invading any secret/ private space of mine
b) that you'll all be on good behaviour :-)

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

[KandisTX]

Toni Lynn,

Another thing you might try stressing to her is the special forum for GG's ONLY. Many times even supportive and understanding SO's need to be able to talk with other SO's about some aspect of our CDing. Plus, she might be able to get answers she doesn't know how to ask the question to :)

Kandis:love::rose2:

[Vivian Best]

As we talked this morning over coffee, we chatted about her joining in the fun here at the forum. She's a bit reluctant for a few reasons.

One seems to be that she it might be invading some private space of mine -- not that I have anything to hide from her (and she has said this herself).

I've told her that I don't mind her joining in and commenting on our various girltalk discussions. I've read many of the threads I've posted to and those to which I haven't posted to her.

So, how can I convince her that

a) she not invading any secret/ private space of mine
b) that you'll all be on good behaviour :-)

Huggles

Toni-Lynn
Hi Toni-Lynn, I don't know about her invading any private space of yours, but I for one enjoy GG's perspective on many things on the forum. I hope she will join and add her opinion on our discussions. Good luck and I hope to hear from her.

[Tomara]

Hi Toni-Lynn , I would say that with what you have told us about your relationship that her joining us shouldnt have any negitive affect on your life together. I`m sure she would be welcomed with open arms when she decides to join us. I look forward to meeting her . Maybe she just needs alittle more time to think about it. Anyway good luck to you both . Tomara

[sterling12]

Toni, I think it's really wonderful that your wife is so supportive and wants to share an important part of your Transgendered Life.

However that part about good behavior.....
If you get a chance, look up DD's Thread (Demonic Daughter,) about the hassles and inappropriate PM's that she has gotten from A Small Minority. It was just a few weeks back. I imagine other Significant Others could probably relate some similar stories.

As long as your wife and yourself can tolerate a few boorish people, I think it would be a very enlightening thing. Often for a spouse, it seems like they are the only person in the world with a CD Husband.

Best case scenario, she joins here on The Forum and gains knowledge, new friends, and finds acceptance. The downside? Doesn't seem to be one....IF, she can put up with The Squids!

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Emily Ann Brown]

Good luck on us behaving !!!!!!!!


Emily Ann

[MJ]

both my older children are members here and we have nothing to hide .
it can be fun at times , but they have not met Emily Ann yet :heehee:

[Holly]

Toni, if your wife is into helping others, you might explain what a positive influence she would be here as another example that a husband and wife can and DO have wonderful lives together in spite of the TG challenges... and I'd like to meet her! :D

[TGMarla]

There are several couples that participate here together and have lots of fun. Look at Sherlyn and Di. They're a hoot, and seem to have a very good time here together. Rachel Morley (the former Angela Darling) has a lovely wife that used to participate here, and was highly regarded by all. Where's she at, Rachel? Hmmm? Anyway, only your wife can make this decision for herself, but I'm sure we'd welcome her.

[Firegirl]

I think its great that you can even talk about this with the SO. Hopefully she will see that this is a wonderful place and there is also a forum just for GG's:)

[NatalieBliss]

1. You are inviting her, so she won't be invading
2. Between the GG and GM forums you can both have a private place if you want it.
3. Most of the people on here are awesome and she should meet us!

[victoriamwilliams1]

Also there are not only SO's on here there are even some of the adult children here too.

[Bethany38]

Toni,
I think your wife should join. It would give her great insight into the world that is CD. Heck if it were not for my wife I would not be here. My lovely honey bunny showed me this site and I could never thant her enough. So I would show her some of these replies and tell her she would be welcomed in.


Sincerely,
Bethany

[DemonicDaughter]

because I often feel the same way. I never want to feel like I'm stealing Kayla's thunder and sometimes I worry that she doesn't post as much because I post way too much! LOL! But the truth is, she's just naturally a quiet person. I sometimes feel a bit apprehensive about posting because I don't want to invade her world, but I also realize she's long since invited me in and would tell me if she felt I was taking over in that aspect.

I for one would love yet another CD-loving GG to chat with. :love:

[Sandra]

So, how can I convince her that

a) she not invading any secret/ private space of mine
b) that you'll all be on good behaviour :-)

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

a) Ok she's supportive and you have nothing to hide and you've suggested it to her, so she won't be invading your secret/private space.

b) now thats a hard one you'll just have to hope that there's good behaviour.:D

She could also support other GGs and show that being married to a cder is ok, and as DD said "I for one would love yet another CD-loving GG to chat with"

[Angie G]

Tell her she'll really enjoy talking with ua and other GG's that we world love to have her with us. :hugs:
Angie

[Sedona]

Toni,

If your wife doesn't want to join, that's okay, and you shouldn't be pushy about it. I was bummed at first when my fiancee said she did not want any part of the forum. Her reasoning: She cares only about my CDing, not anybody elses. She is also happy with my openness, and feels satisfied with my answers to her questions.

If your wife doesn't want to join, not the end of the world, it'll probably be fine.

[linnea]

You are lucky to have a very supportive spouse--that's great. As far as her concerns go, we are supposed to be on good behavior anyway, so all that you really need to reassure her of is that she is not invading your space. I would just let her know that she's welcome and leave it at that. If she really wants to join, she can do so (she does not need your permission). Maybe she's concerned that you will want to join some of her circles.

[Toni_Lynn]

Thank you all so very much for your advice. As a result, Debbie has joined. Her intro is here:

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showpost.php?p=1320513&postcount=816

My wife is my sweetie, the love of my life, all I need and want, my number 1 and my partner forever! :love:

Huggles

Toni-Lynn