Nature or Nurture

[Nikki K]

During recent therapy sessions the concept of 'Nature' vs 'Nurture' came up. That is, are my TG/CD tendencies a learned behaviour (Nurture), possibly in response to childhood trauma, or a genetic or hereditary trait (Nature).

I thought a quick straw poll here would be enlightening.

For more details on "Nature vs. Nurture" see Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nature_versus_nurture).

Have fun!

Nikki.

[Deborah Jane]

I,ve got no idea where it came from!!!
I just know it,s something i need/want to do!!

[Lisa Rose]

I voted nature because that's were it came from but it's been nutured over the years.

[Laura_Stephens]

I wish someone could tell me definitively.

[VirginiaX23]

Although I was the product of a mother who was trying for the third time to have a daughter, there was never anything in the way my parents brought me up that would have encouraged me to be a CD. Perhaps I was supposed to have been my mother's daughter but that silly Y chromosome got in the way. Who is to say? But my desire to be as a woman at times does not stem from anything but that part of my brain that sees women and thinks, if not for silly gender politics, I could be wearing something like that.

[docrobbysherry]

Since my urge didn't begin until after I was 50, maybe u should have included another catagory for me: Fetish.

[SherriePall]

I voted nature because I remember wanting so much to be a girl or to dress as one ever since I was very young.

[Tomara]

Hi , My vote was nature, I dont think at 6 or 8 years old ( the first time for me) anyone knows that they want to be a crossdresser , so I would have to say it is likely genetic. I also think by regularly crossdressing it is somewhat nurtureing the want or need to continue .Tomara

[Paula Rae]

Nikki,

Good Thread!
I voted "Nature", I can't remember ever not wanting to be a girl, I always played with the girls
and hardly ever associated with the boys, jacks and hopscotch were my games along with dolls and playing house.

Paula Rae

[JoAnnDallas]

I voted for both. Having a Medical Research background, I suspect that a lot of our nature is from birth, but nurture also plays a role. How we grow up does help shape our perspective both physical and mental.
Scientist say that if you cloned a perfect replica of Aldof Hitler today, he would not be the same person when he grew up than the original was. That is is the Nurture aspect.
We may start off with a more fem brain structor, but items like if we had sisters, brothers, both, single mom, can affect how and when we start CDing and etc. If you only had older brothers, you may have started later in life than if you had two older sisters where you could try on their clothes or they found you out and gave you help early in life.

[victoriamwilliams1]

I say its both, I had situations at the age that I started dressing which makes me believe this. I was curious about dressing before I was made to wear a dress for my cousin that needed to be sewed and at the time we where the same size in height and clothing and from that day the journey stated. This includes events like my mother saying things while clothes shopping! All the time I would hear "I wish you where a girl, the clothing is much prettier" those are just 2 of the events.

[Sara Jessica]

No question in my mind, NATURE!!! There was absolutely nothing in my upbringing that was either the genesis or perpetuator of my transgender feelings. What on earth would lead a child of 4 or 5 years old to go to bed and pray to wake up as a girl and to imagine all that would follow from that magical transformation? I'll tell you what it was, NATURE! I am convinced of this to the essence of my being. It is what it is.

[Mona]

I voted both. I've kinda known since I was 10 or so and think that would be nature but my parents were traditional and I needed to break free from them before I dared to explore my femininity.

[Joy Carter]

God please tell me. Family raised in poverty (seven kids)and lots of arguing (I don't recall). I was maybe three or four when I went to live with mothers parents. There I had my first dressing experience. It was grandma's house dress. She represented security and love. But I was pretty attached to grandpa to. Is that why I dress ? I don't know, as my adult life is pretty good. So nurture.......possibly ?
One thing that I can say is when my spouse and I grew apart, intimently, the CD came in like gang busters. Maybe I'm onto something here. Sorry to get so heavy. But if it helps someone.

[LindaMarie]

I answered Nature because I think it's mostly Nature, but I believe it's really a combination of both (I'm one of those anal Information Technology people so if I were doing the poll, I would have had 16 categories with categories like 80% Nature, 20% Nuture and no one would have answered the poll at all :)

As others have noted, this is a very interesting thread. I think most of us wondered where this "gift" came from and most of us can't really explain it. There's usually no "ah ha" moment where we can say "oh, yes, that's why I love dressing up in women's clothes, of course." Sometimes, we back into explanations, but I don't know how valid those are.

[VtVicky]

I'm with DRS. Fetish is nurture.

I'm a big Learning Theory fan. I think we can generally find the roots of our fetishs in some learning sequence. Remember that both Classical and Operant conditioning can happen without our active participation/knowledge.

I'm not sure science has enough objective information to support the genetic etiology. In my experience, most CDs seem to have had some experience that connected CDing to pleasure, or at least pain relief.

But, since I do believe there is a genetic component to male homosexuality, I am willing to entertain the idea that some CDing is gentically driven. Or, at least, it is a learned response to something that is genetically driven.

Sadly, there is very little objective data in the scientific literature. Most of what is published is anecdotal and/or selfserving.

The very earliest psychologists were call Introspectionists. They looked into themselves and decided that what they saw in themselves applied to the rest of mankind. Thank God more objective scientific reasoning took over. I bring this up because much of what we read about CDing is written from the perspective of one individual applying his/her own situation and sensitivities to the rest of us. We can certainly learn from each other. But, we all have our own different learning experiences. And, while we often share traits and tastes, we are, in the end, quite different from one another.

[sissystephanie]

I voted for both, because I think most of us are that way. I am sure I am. I guess I did have some childhood trauma, since I remember my dear old grandma putting one of my sisters dresses on me to play in. On more then one occasion too! But I really didn't care, because I was playing with only girls anyway! This was when I was five or six years old!

As I got older nature took over. I tried other feminine garments and liked them. By the time I was 10 I was really hooked. I would have gladly gone to school in a dress and panties! Wasn't allowed to, of course!:sad: Don't know what a therapist would say about me, and don't really care! Don't want to be a female, just want to dress like one!!:heehee: Older age is wonderful!!:love:

Sissy/Stephanie

Lady on the outside, but man underneath!

[Kristy_Iowa_CD]

I voted nature because I had these feelings at a very young age. I distinctly remember wishing I was a girl when I was younger. My best friend in grade school was a girl and I was never a traditionally "masculine" boy (I had absolutely no interest in sports, scouts, etc.).

Plus, I didn't have a traumatic or dysfunctial childhood. So if not nature I have no idea where it came from.

[sterling12]

I voted for both, and I'll tell you why. I think it's possibly a case of one or the other depending on the individual, but you didn't offer that choice.

I know for myself, my earliest remembered occurrences of CD are around age four. It's that way for many Gurls. This happens so early in life, can't imagine how it would be a "learned" activity.

Conversely, a lot of Gurl's start around the onset of puberty or sometimes later, it's often related to adolescent auto-sexual activity. So, that's a case to be made for "Nurture."

Doc relates a late life CD, and it does occasionally happen. At least it gets told around here in anecdotal accounts. I would guess that it's been suppressed for years with late onset, and since we don't know how early, you could make a case for "either" with this situation.

There's a third theory about a "nurture/propensity." The idea is that you are born with the "propensity" to CD but it takes some type of learned activity to bring it out.

Since this is the first poll I've ever seen, and we aren't being very scientific, let us leave this one in the realm of, "Maybe we're all different and each case unique." However, it's pretty darn interesting. This has the potential to get some very thought provoking responses.

Peace and Love, Joanie

[chaotropic]

nature - I can't say I've ever had much in the way of positive reinforcemnt.

I do recall seeing transgendered folks on phil donahue's talk show when I was a tyke and knowing that is where I fit in, but I also knew that it was largely condemned and not understood by society. it's kind of funny how perceptive one can be as a child. I knew from the start that it was something I had to internalize and hide.

[Robyn2006]

Voted "both," but who the hell knows. All I know is that with a fairly absent father and TWO to-die-for gorgeous older sisters it was a pretty easy call for anyone taking a look from above. From day one it seems, all I wanted was to be as feminine as my sisters... it was as natural as taking my next breath.

And breathe I do!

Robyn

[Sarah...]

Oh, nature, nature, nature for sure!! Nature makes gorgeous things. I wonder for those of us who developed later in life we simply failed to nurture our nature properly. Speaking as someone who recalls dressing up at the age of 4 or 5 I'm convinced it can only be nature, which for me means it is exactly the spot-on, right thing - and oh boy am I nurturing my natural femininity now!!

What a fantastic question that was, really got my brain cells firing away - thanks.

Love Sarah...

[Joanne f]

I would say that it has to be in your Nature to start with and then you begin to Nurture it as you go through your life subject to opportunity, this could be done consciously or subconsciously.
I do not really see what trauma in your childhood has to do with it as i would have thought if anything it would turn you against it not towards it, but then i do have a thing about so called therapist`s that think they know why you do things yet they have never experience it themselves, ( no doubt read it in a text book ).



joanne

[Lanore]

Nature. My thoughts and feelings as for back as I can remember have been female. I know I was born male, but that just didn't fit to how I felt inside and I've never tried to figure it out. I was never pressured or told who I was supposed to be and am very thankfull I wasn't. Who I am today, is who I always wanted to be.

Lanore

[Lilith Moon]

I voted nature because I have felt "different" from "normal" males all my life although I wasn't sure what that difference was at first.

In hindsight and from old photographs I now know that I was quite girly looking and acting. Not deliberately, it was just me being myself before I learned to conceal such things.

[Keely]

I think nature since I've been doing this since such an early age I don't know how I could have learned it.

[Steveo]

i have to say nature, for these reasons. nature imply's that this part of our being, is a natural occourance, i do enjoy my dressing' but i have to say that from a historical view point (mine anyway) i would rather it not have happened. nurture, imply's an outside involment, and on this forum there have been posts of the kind were a perant or sibling have occationed the disire to dress, from my perspective there never was any outside influence,i did not start to dress untill late into my teens and by then both my perants were gone, one more thing, i don't beleave that a person could learn and then like to dress, unless his or her natural instinks were not there in the background somewere, however hidden they were.

[Bobsie]

When I was a child, and alone in the family home, I rummaged through some places where I was not supposed to go. I was looking for things to try on, of course, but one day I found an old letter from an aunt to my mother, dated just after my birth, commiserating with her that the much awaited and desired "Susan" had failed to arrive, and that I had shown up instead!
I remember that my bedroom decor, clothing and other accoutrements were in pink, so for sure my parents wanted and expected a girl. Strangely, Susan had then for long been my favorite female name!

I wonder if there is any way that the desire of a persons' parents before birth could influence gender identification?

Anyway, I answered 'nature', because I know I was born this way.

[jamie55]

There's a third theory about a "nurture/propensity." The idea is that you are born with the "propensity" to CD but it takes some type of learned activity to bring it out.

I like this for my answer. It's not like one morning over a bowl of Cheerios I decided to start wearing girls clothes but something inside me sure liked it. I had a normal male childhood, played sports, boy scouts, hunting/fishing, etc. and as a matter of fact still do those things. I work in a male dominated profession, in fact have never seen a female rig up driver and in 30+ yrs I've seen a bunch. I am the first born of 4 boys and so have no real positive female influences in my life that I'm aware of.

[jackie_p]

I have been a CD since I was 8 years old (49 now), and I have always wished it wasn't the case. Until recently I've suppressed it, purged, the whole nine yards. I think that if it was nurture it would be a whole lot easier to deal with. I wouldn't change it now, but I certainly wouldn't have chosen it when I was 8 years old.

Jackie

[trannie T]

It seems that about once a week there is a thread asking what causes us to be crossdressers. They all wind up with the same solution, 'We have absolutely no idea.'

[Nadia-Maria]

I voted both.

. Nurture seems to be clearly involved in my CDing since my mother crossdressed me as a baby (most probably wanting a girl instead of a boy) before I became later a CDer as a child.

. But, many crossdressers do have had an ordinary childhood.
Hence Nature has to be considered too.

Love

Nadia

[KimberlyS]

My personally reflections and belief is I am who I am from birth. My up bringing and society have had an affect on who I am, but the core of me is nature. As for my CDing, it is my up bringing and society that tells me what clothes a feminine person should wear and which clothes a masculine person wears. I guess my brain figured if it was ok for women to dress more masculine it was ok for me to dress my feminine self in more feminine clothes.

For me I am not trying to be a woman, just aligning my femininity with the clothes I have been taught to wear from day one of being born.

[tricia_uktv]

My first recollection of life was ridicously dressing in a show outfit of my Mothers when I was four. Was told not to be so silly!

[MWCMDarlene]

I voted Nurture. I remember as a 5 or 6 year old going ove to my friends house. His grandmother lived with them and she had several boxes of clothes (dresses, shoes, shawls, hats, gloves, etc.) that his mother and grandmother would allow us to play "dress up". We would both "dress up" and without even bit of hesitation or apprehension, go outside and walk up and down the street in front of his house. (Man, to be able to do that now!) However, I didn't see or view it as crossdressing. When I first began to truely experiment with CDing, I was 12 and was visiting my grandparents. In the newspaper was a column by either Ann Landers or Dear Abby about a man who wore his wife's clothes. I was intrigued. Within a week, I was over at my aunt's house (had a key and snuck in while no one was home), and in the laundry room was one of her bras out in plain view. That's when it first began with me.

[TGMarla]

I think blaming the whole thing on nature is a bit narrow. It shunts the blame onto an uncontrollable source, and thus allows the TG person to hold himself (or herself) blameless. I think that's very convenient and a bit of a cop-out. I admit that I may have had a tendency to be drawn towards feminine interests and items from a young age, but I didn't start crossdressing until I was 12. And I can attest that I helped it along a whole lot after that. I nurtured it myself. I continued to dress more and more because I liked it, and I wanted it. So while there may have been some at-birth predisposition towards my transgendered nature, I know I am to blame for it myself as well.

[noeleena]

hi...oh easy being born this way... nature ....it was not learned yet for me was just right . wow . the posts here are neat . where do i see my self . am i male or female ....or more to the point both. what made that change. at about 10 it was why am i not like the girls . 40 years later opooos i came out to jos my s o . hey i am a women from then on it was up & down .....oh dear ...... now i know i am both at 60 . & just slowly growing as a women & accepted as one ...& its so neat. he he . i love it ..... . ...noeleena....

[rustynail]

I can remember being fascintaed by my Mum's silky slips from a very early age (3 or 4), but i slept in their bedroom then so there may be a nurture element. However i know that my Dad was always buying Mum silky nighties and things, and had catalogues, so i guess he would have been into it as well if he had felt more free to indulge - so I guess that is nature and genes. Is there a "nylon gene"?

[yms]

Why does it have be a "childhood trauma?" Isn't trauma the opposite of nurture?


During recent therapy sessions the concept of 'Nature' vs 'Nurture' came up. That is, are my TG/CD tendencies a learned behaviour in response to childhood trauma (Nurture) or a genetic or hereditary trait (Nature).

I thought a quick straw poll here would be enlightening.

For more details on "Nature vs. Nurture" see Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nature_versus_nurture).

Have fun!

Nikki.

[Rachaelb64]

I haven't got a clue were mine come from, I'm just enjoying it :)

[DonnaT]

Mostly nature, as I believe for many, those who are trans in some way or another, the way our brain was wired contributed to being trans.

A little nurture is thrown in there as a result of 1) seeing a neighbor dress her brother, which triggered the desire in me to want to change places with her brother, and 2) the feeling that this is right resulting from trying on some clothes a few years later. Without those two triggers to close some trans switch already wired in the brain, I'd probably be one of those unwary trans individuals. Like someone who may be predisposed to alcoholism, but they aren't an alcoholic until it is triggered by their first drink.

[Byllie]

Now, this was a tricky question. You asked about "behavior" which, as we all know, for things is a bit of nature and a bit f nurture.

Now, if you had asked a question regarding the "need to" CD, Id have said nature right away.

[Steveo]

all i will say is could any of you give it up for good and not care,
that is the real reason as i see it, for being nature that instills in us the need to cross dress no matter when the trigger happens could be 5 or 55 the trigger is there in our brains just sitting there ready for the day we just think i'll just put that on and see how it feels, now so called staight males never have that, just moment' and one more thing apparently transsexual men have the same part of the brain that triggers emotion as women, or so i'm told.

[KandisTX]

I had to say both on this poll. One does not exist without the other. Each of us has certain things that are engrained in us at birth, but how we handle/respond to those criteria are aided by how we are raised. So, in my case I can safely say that it was a case of nurture and nature, even though there was not much support of my CDing early on in life.

Kandis:love::rose2:

[Nikki K]

I just reread my question and spotted the dreadful grammar!
Although a little late I've edited the original which hopefully makes more sense.

Nikki :o