Jealous of effeminate men

[VirginiaX23]

Do you ever find yourself looking at another man and thinking that he's lucky because it would be so easy for him to pass as a woman?

[Karren H]

Nahhh... But I look in the mirror or window and think... Damn... I look like a friggin girl in a business suit!! Lol. Being caught between two genders......... Really makes it dificult to pass in either.. Sigh......

[VirginiaX23]

But Karren, I am jealous of you because when I look in the mirror when I am wearing a suit, I just see a big guy in a suit. When I look at your pics, I see an attractive woman.

[Fab Karen]

I think what you actually mean is an androgynous-looking guy. An effeminate guy would have people assuming ( whether the case or not ) that he's gay.

[TGMarla]

Being caught between two genders......... Really makes it dificult to pass in either.. Sigh......

Very interesting comment. Spot on, too, I think.

[Ashley Lyn]

Try as I might, I just can't seem to make myself look like a girl in anything...
Maybe from the back, while wearing boots and a skirt, but....:sad:

Some guys just 'aren't meant to look like girls'... DRAT! :straightface: I'd be so darn happy...:daydreaming:

For those guys who could, and don't, they have no idea what they are missing! :heehee:

[VirginiaX23]

I think what you actually mean is an androgynous-looking guy. An effeminate guy would have people assuming ( whether the case or not ) that he's gay.

You are correct, Karen. I was thinking of men with more feminine features.

[Lisa Rose]

Interesting question. I'll have to think about it. I do think about if I were gay I think I'd be more attracted to a more feminate man rather than the all masculine, body builder type. HMMMMMMMMM?

[Alana65]

Jealous ?

My answer is, YES. Whenever I see a man with a small physique, I always say to myself, "I wish I was small like that so I could dress & pass more easily. Then, I'd be "out and about" all the time." :daydreaming::daydreaming::daydreaming:

[tgirlinva]

I find myself like that all the time. Especially with some of the girls here. I guess I should count my blessings in a way b/c I have rather small features, but I can tell you that the process never ends. even if you were 100% passable, you would still look at other girls or feminine men and say "i wish i had this or that". but the fact that some people reach passability so easily drives me nuts! and i can totally sympathize with your feelings, no matter what i do, all i see is a man in a dress.

[Angie G]

Yes I have. :hugs:
Angie

[sterling12]

Initially, I will look at a gurl who is very petite and say to myself, "Gee I bet she has an easy time of it when she tries to pass."

And then I remember what probably is going on in her life when she's not en femme. Being small for a guy has all kinds of hassles attached to it. You often feel inadequate around taller women and it seems sometimes that the world is inhabited by giants. You probably got a lot of bullying and "beat-downs" when you were younger, and let's not forget buying clothes for your male self. My dad was very small, like 5' 4" and weighed maybe 105 pounds. He had just as many problems buying clothes as big men, maybe more. If you doubt, go to the store and see how much is available in "smalls and size 6shoes." It ain't much!

And here's an aspect of being petite that most people never think about. I'm over at The parliament House one Saturday night, and in the ladies bathroom I am just getting "dog-cussed" by this inebriated young thing. I thought she was angry cause' I was CD. Turns out after we talked; she was just P.O.'d because she still felt very short, even in high heels. She thought my 5' 9" was the ideal.

I guess that's the point. We seem to never be satisfied with "what we got." We always think something else is better. Turns out, everybody else feels the same way! Nope, I'm not jealous....envious maybe, sometimes, but not jealous.

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Nicole Erin]

Do you ever find yourself looking at another man and thinking that he's lucky because it would be so easy for him to pass as a woman?

Well turd yes I am!

Usually tho it is if they have kinda feminine hair and a face.

[michelle64]

i somewhat agree...i am 5'10 280 pounds with a very fit body due to extensive bodybuilding (hobby)...i have next to nothing in facial/body hair and what i do have is very very blonde...very small unnoticable adams apple as well...i have seen much smaller guys with enuff hair to be considered the missing link...it all depends on what you are born with and with the right wig, makeup and clothing even being "manly" you can approach passing (yes i hate that word)..the problem i see in those who have difficulty passing is no butt and no indication of hips...those 2 features are the most important (along with limited facial/body hair) i see in being able to successfully pull off the transition...keep in mind if i can go to the mall and pass i suspect most others can as well

[Julogden]

Yes, many times. Being 6'5" is an absolute curse as far as I'm concerned. What I would give to be a foot shorter and slender.........

Carol

[Cristi]

Yes, I notice shorter slim men with softer features and think to myself "It would be SO easy to pass if I had that body!"

But here I am, 6'1" and 220lbs with big hands and feet, doing the best I can.

I have SOME features that help a bit, though. Very small adam's apple and a bit softer than 'normal' features on the lower part of my face (no square jaw and cleft chin) make things a bit easier than they could have been.

But really.... I know tall women. I know women wth big feet or hands... and nobody doubts THEIR femininity, so I should be able to overcome these issues with practice.

[KarenSusan]

Do you ever find yourself looking at another man and thinking that he's lucky because it would be so easy for him to pass as a woman?

Yes, I do that all the time. The actor Christopher Morley who was in "Freebie and the Bean" was so fortunate in this regard.

[Sarah Doepner]

Hell yes!

[docrobbysherry]

No, it never occurres to me that others around me mite dress.

Yes, because guys that look as u described them, r called "cute" guys by GGs. And they get lots of GG attention. In my 60+ years, no one has ever called me cute! (Sherry, maybe, Robert, never.)

[Debutante]

This depends. Seeing an androgynous male, with more feminine features that are beautiful or appealing, can induce envy. So, yes, this feeling can happen.
But since I am one of those CDers dealing with a distinct masculine side, to get along in the world (in career, community, with my wife, etc), I am finding I need to have BOTH a healthy masculine side (i.e. looking less feminine), and developing my femme expression as well.
A tricky difficult business, this -- and some times painful.
I have had a someone feminine look at times, that seems to come and go, being noticed by others, so I know the uncomfortableness of looking 'feminine' as a male.
Being preyed on by agressive, nasty males as a result of looking feminine -- is not something I want to ever deal with, and do avoid.

[Debutante]

Yes, I do that all the time. The actor Christopher Morley who was in "Freebie and the Bean" was so fortunate in this regard.

Yes -- Chistopher Morley was wonderful in a number of films as an open, clearly Crossdressing male to female role.

[Pamela Julie]

I don't look at other guys and think anything about how they look. I look at many women and think to myself, I wish I looked that good.

Pamela:)

[MentalMercury]

Yes! This one guy I know.. who is mistaken for a girl constantly in guy mode. He's even said to me "it'd be way too easy for me to do drag, it would take no effort"

[KateSpade83]

I'm not jealous, because I'm perfect the way I am!

[carolinewalker_2000]

Using Karen's amendment to your original question; absolutely, happens all the time. There are lots og guys out there who would make beautiful girls - for all I know they may be CD'ers!!!

Still we can't do much to alter our basic male shape. I just grateful that, from time to time, I can look in the mirror and see the girl I know is inside me.



I think what you actually mean is an androgynous-looking guy. An effeminate guy would have people assuming ( whether the case or not ) that he's gay.

[Mollyanne]

Jealous ?

My answer is, YES. Whenever I see a man with a small physique, I always say to myself, "I wish I was small like that so I could dress & pass more easily. Then, I'd be "out and about" all the time." :daydreaming::daydreaming::daydreaming:


My thoughts exactly!!!!


:love: Mollyanne

[CaptLex]

Jealous ?

My answer is, YES. Whenever I see a man with a small physique, I always say to myself, "I wish I was small like that so I could dress & pass more easily. Then, I'd be "out and about" all the time." :daydreaming::daydreaming::daydreaming:

That sounds good in theory, but what about this?


I have had a someone feminine look at times, that seems to come and go, being noticed by others, so I know the uncomfortableness of looking 'feminine' as a male.
Being preyed on by agressive, nasty males as a result of looking feminine -- is not something I want to ever deal with, and do avoid.
That's what I was thinking when I first saw this thread - what happens to those guys when they go back to guy mode? I'll bet it's not that easy to live with that smaller physique and softer features in the boys' club. :straightface:

[BillieJoe]

Years ago at a store I frequently shopped at I would often have this one person check me out. Most people looking at this person could not tell if that person was a male or female. If you were to put a skirt or frilly blouse on that person you would believe without question that it was a female. A very androgynous hairstyle and clothes that looked neither male or female added to the look. I found out about two years after first running in to this person that it was a male. His voice also added to the illusion. He was too short to be be considered a man at first but then again too tall to quickly be considered a female. He could've transitioned without problems. His body shape also further added to the illusion that he was either/or. He was always clean shaven. I hadn't the slightest idea what his sexual orientation was, although I did eventually find out his name (no name tags). I later suspected that it was he that would often appear on another TG site that I used to frequent because he had the same name and was from the same city as I was. I used to think what a joy it would be to have all the same attributes as this guy. Yes, I was jealous of him and looked up to him as a near perfect role model of a very passable CDer. I haven't seen or heard of this fellow for many years now. I wish him/her? well....

[VirginiaX23]

That sounds good in theory, but what about this?


That's what I was thinking when I first saw this thread - what happens to those guys when they go back to guy mode? I'll bet it's not that easy to live with that smaller physique and softer features in the boys' club. :straightface:

Lex, the grass is always greener on the other side, I suppose... with the exception of those that were born exactly the way they feel and don't look at others and wonder what it is like to be them.

[CaptLex]

Lex, the grass is always greener on the other side, I suppose... with the exception of those that were born exactly the way they feel and don't look at others and wonder what it is like to be them.
I think that was my point, Virginia. It's a nice proposition if you're gonna present as female 24/7, but not really practical for those that don't.

[Alana65]

I think that was my point, Virginia. It's a nice proposition if you're gonna present as female 24/7, but not really practical for those that don't.

No offense Lex, but that's why I added.......Then, I'd be "out and about" all the time."............in my original post. If I had been "blessed" with a smaller physique, I (probably) would've transitioned years ago. I can't say that it definitely would've happened, but the choice to transition would've been a little easier (not that it would've been "easy"). I hope this reads the way I'm intending.

[CaptLex]

No offense Lex, but that's why I added.......Then, I'd be "out and about" all the time."............in my original post. If I had been "blessed" with a smaller physique, I (probably) would've transitioned years ago. I can't say that it definitely would've happened, but the choice to transition would've been a little easier (not that it would've been "easy"). I hope this reads the way I'm intending.

None taken, Alana, but "out and about all the time" can mean different things to different people. It could mean dressing and going out often, it could mean transitioning fully or something else entirely, so I couldn't assume anything in particular from your response. :idontknow:

[kimberlyt221]

I don't look at other guys and think anything about how they look. I look at many women and think to myself, I wish I looked that good.

Pamela:)

Me too! Also I am a bit jealous of some of the girls here.

[Sonia Kiss]

I have a little different take on this. Sure I'm envious when I see male that that has a less masculine body than mine, or less masculine facial features, but often I'm envious of the men who have obviously effeminate movement, mannerisms, or even voice. They bubble with style and personality and warmth and emotion. I see this so often in gay clubs and dance clubs. I wish I had half the femininity of some of these guys!

Sonia