Failed Insult

[Jada Rose]

So here's one for you:

Gathered up the wife and son and went to a family dinner yesterday. One of my brothers was there that always trades insults about which one of us is gaining the most weight. This has been going on for years even though neither one of us is really overweight. I'm 6'3" 195lbs, and he's 6'2" 220lbs.
Anyway, he thought he would get in the first jab this time by saying," If you put on any more weight, your boobs are gonna be bigger than your wife's". My wife, who supports me in CDing and has known for some time, almost choked. She gave me one of those looks that said "If he only knew" and grinned. I wanted to tell him that actually, when enfemme, they are.:heehee: Anybody ever had something like that happen?

[Princess29]

I'm not sure if this counts but when I was going for a job recently (which I subsequently got), on the first day I was travelling up in an elevator with the boss (+2 others) and then one floor up, 2 women got into the elevator. The boss asked what floor were they after and I said "menswear" (this was not a department store by any means) and the boss said to me in response "I'm just surprised to see you wearing mens clothes for a change".
I had never met that guy before that day so it was a completely random comment but still, of all the jokes he could have made, hows that for one huh?

[curiouslooker]

Here's one for you.

I was at work and another employee came up and told me, "You need to tuck".

I got a smile on my face and said, "What?"

"You need to tuck, you came out, you need to tuck."

He was talking about my shirt.

I told my wife and we had a long hard laugh.

[Jenny Beth]

Not really a failed insult but a few months ago my wife and our niece planned a shopping trip to town to check out a new lingerie shop. When our nice arrived to pick up my wife she said it's a girl thing and I wouldn't understand. My wife looks over at me with grin on her face knowing full well I would have loved to tag along and gives me a little wink. The worst part was she didn't even buy me anything, but then I knew she couldn't without arousing suspicion. :sad: